Here’s the latest from our Scandal-plagued School Superintendent
Monday, May 4, 2015
FROM: “SMILING DALLAS” JACKSON
TO: TURPIN TEACHERS
RE: FUTURE TESTING GUIDELINES
The past weeks have been rather difficult due to the unneeded light being shined upon me, my family and some students, causing many in the Forest Hills School District administration to scurry and hide like roaches when a kitchen light is turned on.
Unfortunately, many teachers, which may include you, have short memories of the last tax levy I led, swindling voters into approving and causing me to have a perpetual ear-to-ear grin on my face. It’s been less than a year since ignorant voters said yes, and while this latest tax grab is sure to harm the savings and retirements of Anderson Township residents, forcing some to move out of the community, remember your paychecks and retirements are now “good as gold” thanks entirely to me with the unwavering support of the “rubber stamp” Forest Hills School Board, a group that would never go against my word or rule.
Therefore, moving forward, student tests, especially tests my son, daughter or any immediately family member, which is to include 3rd and 4th cousins by marriage, are to be graded using the following guidelines:
Question #1: What is your name? 50% of the score.
Question #2: What is your age? 30% of the score.
Question #3: What is your gender? 10% of the score.
(Students are allowed to look if unsure.)
Question #4: What is your school’s name? 4.5% of the score.
(Turpin, Terpin, Turpen will all be acceptable.)
Question #5: For Calculus – Evaluate .5% of the score.
Should you have questions, keep in mind I am the one regularly reaching into the pockets of Anderson Township over-taxed payers.
Joyfully,
“Smiling Dallas” Jackson
