Sunday, March 15, 2015
The Whistleblower Week in Review
MONDAY (March 9), in our Official “Political Backstabbers Week” E-dition, The Blower asked, “Is that a dagger in your toga, or are you just glad to see us?”
TUESDAY (March 10), in our Special “Backstabber Nominations” E-dition, The Blower asked, “Is Obama America’s “Backstabber in Chief?”
WEDNESDAY (March 11), in our Official “Backstabber Voting” E-dition, The Blower said, “Best Friend” is ten letters but so is “Lying Bitch.”
THURSDAY (March 12), in our Special “Backstabbers in History” E-dition, The Blower warned, “It’s Almost the Ides!”
FRIDAY (March 13) in our “Just Another Guest Column E-dition, The Blower said, “Hillory’s in the Pillory!”
AND SATURDAY (March 14) in our Special “Political Backstabbers Day Eve” E-dition, The Blower said, “Don’t say we didn’t warn you!”
This Week’s Top Stories
OUR NUMBER ONE HILLARY SCANDAL UPDATE STORY THIS WEEK was when Hillary won the Whistleblower’s Best Liberal Liar Award this week because not even all those Kneepad Liberals in the Press still believe her about her missing e-mails.
OUR NUMBER TWO HILLARY SCANDAL UPDATE STORY THIS WEEK was when Business Insider reported one of Hillary Clinton’s neighbors placed a sign near her home in Chappaqua, New York mocking the ongoing controversy over her emails. The sign declares there is a “Used Email Server” for sale at the Clinton home with a “Clean Hard Drive.”
AND OUR NUMBER THREE HILLARY SCANDAL UPDATE STORY THIS WEEK was when Biz Pac Review reported the next Hillary Scandal after a federal judge on Friday ordered the State Department to release the passenger manifests of overseas flights the likely 2016 presidential hopeful took while serving as secretary of state. Did she take Clinton Foundation donors with her as a thank you for their support? Some Mean-Spirited Republicans are wondering.
Edward Cropper’s World
Today, PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFER EDWARD CROPPER shows us a picture of Bill Clinton telling us he’s never had e-mails with that woman.
You can see more of Mr. Cropper’s fine work HERE.
Breaking News
Doctors and nurses performed the first successful Penis Transplant at Stellenbosch University in Cape Town, South Africa, but Sky News forgot to mention if they found a transgender Dick Donor.
This Week’s Top Item On The Conservative Agenda
With Republicans in Congress cave in to Obama and the Disingenuous DemocRATS on raising the Debt Ceiling one more time? The latest suspension only expires TODAY, resetting the new debt limit at the current paltry level of about $18.1 trillion.
Other current items on The Conservative Agenda will just have to wait, including: Obama’s Leadership, The Clinton Legacy, Other Dishonest Democrats, Obama’s Secret Service, Biden’s Blunders, Obama Supporters In The Press, DemocRATS In Disarray, Polling For Trolls, Veterans, Racial Healing, Amnesty For Future DemocRATS, Baby Killing, and Making Sure Not To Hurt The Feelings Of All Those Murdering Muslim Bastards.
This Week’s Liberal Liars Award
Goes to Black Racist National Urban League Chief Marc Morial, who says Ferguson Police Shootings shows “People Want Further Change.” Obama says “The path to justice is one that we must all travel together.” After months of race-baiting from Obama’s favorite race-baiter Al Sharpton, Obama’s Disgraced Black Racist Attorney General Eric Holder’s new bold statement on the Police Shooting In Ferguson was: “This was not someone trying to trying Healing to Ferguson.” Meanwhile, Ferguson Protest Leader Shaun King said, “Protesters who witnessed the Police Shooting “Are Victims Too.” So was it really a surprise that only a day ahead of Obama’s photo op trip to Selma to commemorate the 50th anniversary of Bloody Sunday, a new poll showed that nearly half of Americans believed race relations had worsened during his presidency.
This Week’s Racial Healing Update
The left-wing Univision cable network has fired Emmy-winning host Rodner Figueroa for comparing First Lady Michelle Obama to an ape. During his show, Figueroa showed photos of the First Lady and said, “Mind you, you know that Michelle Obama looks like she’s part of the cast of “Planet of the Apes,” the film.” Figueroa, BTW, is a Gay Hispanic who voted for Obama. Is this a trifecta of a Racial Healing Update or what!
Whistleblower War on Political Correctness
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry, according to all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, who would rather ride to downtown Cincinnati on a bus and stand in line for three hours to vote, than mail in absentee ballots.
Now Here’s Today’s Politically Incorrect Joke: What word that starts with “N” does WLW Hate Radio Trash Talking Racist-in- Residence Bill Cunningham never want to call a black person? “Neighbor.” (Send us your politically incorrect jokes. If they’re offensive enough, we might even publish them.)
The Feck Stops Here
Down at The Fishwrap, Metro Mole says Skaggie Maggie nominated the Guys at Gannett for the Whistleblower Backstabber of the Year Award after they threw her out on my whiny ass but her Liberal Legacy will surely live on for a long time, especially since support for our local Swingers, Perverted Physicians, and Corpsefuckers at the Morgue have now been officially added to The Fishwrap’s Liberal Agenda, along with PC (If It’s Politically Correct, You Can’t Object), Tree Hugging, Keeping People From Smoking, Diversity Uber Alles, Unions Blues, Fanatical Feminists, Supporting Sodomy Rites, Global Warming: G-Uncontrol, Liberal Brainwashing In Schools, Voting Rights For People Who Are Too Stupid To Vote, Streetcars, Scalping the Washington Redskins, and Giving Away Free Stuff With Your Money.
But why should any of this surprise you? After all, don’t our Feckless Fishwrappers always say: It’s not Baseball, Mom, or Apple Pie that have always made our area great, it’s our “Disgraceful Diversity.”
In Northern Kentucky
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says according to Breitbart, Republican Senate Surrender Leader Bitch McConnell doesn’t have to bring U.S. Attorney Loretta Lynch, Obama’s nominee to serve as the next Attorney General of the United States, up on the Senate floor for a vote next week—or EVER—if he doesn’t want her confirmed. But he’s doing it anyway, even though just four Senate RINOs have said they’ll vote for her—and even their support for her is questionable at this point.
McConnell’s office has struggled to defend the Majority Leader’s decision—which flies in the face of a pre-election promise to not allow any attorney general nominee who supports Obama’s executive amnesty. McConnell’s spokesman Don Stewart repeatedly refused to answer when Breitbart News asked him why the leader plans to bring Lynch’s nomination up for a floor vote next week. He also refused to state whether McConnell himself—even though he’s bringing up Lynch for a vote—will personally vote for Lynch, something that would be a direct violation of the pre-election promise McConnell made to voters.
More Politics Unusual
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 44 BCE Roman Emperor Julius Caesar ignored his soothsayer’s words of warning and went to work that day anyway, whereupon Brutus and the rest of the RINOs in the Senate stabbed him in the back, and the front, and just about every other place on his body.
THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose “Beware the Ides of March” from Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar.”
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen the fallout continues in Ferguson, Missouri, following a Justice Department report accusing the city’s police department of a widespread pattern of racial discrimination. But in most inner city communities, is police racism the real problem? Not according to 70% voters who think the level of crime in low-income inner city communities is a bigger problem in America today than police discrimination against minorities. [READ MORE HERE]
MORE RACIAL HEALING: Never one to shy from controversy, Rush Limbaugh pointed out what many others consider impolitic to state aloud — that the racist chant led by University of Oklahoma frat brothers and captured on a video that went viral could be mistaken for a rap tune, and if Kanye West sang the Racist Frat Song, it would be a hit.
OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Kimmel’s “There is controversy surrounding Obama’s appearance on the show. Monday we announced the president would be here. This morning I got a letter from 47 Republicans telling me not to sign any deals with him.”
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #91 says you should turn up at your local Muslim outreach program by wearing an “I’d rather be Waterboarding” t-shirt.
GOING GALT means taking the John Galt Pledge. Let’s all say it together: “I swear by my life, and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”
THIS WEEK’S SEEDIEST KID OF ALL WAS “YOUNG TOM BRINKMAN,” who learned to hate taxes at an early age. [READ MORE HERE]
THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “Your Money’s Worth” told what happened when the Coalition Opposing Unemployed Politicians came up with the idea of electing nine county commissioners instead of three. This op-ed column first appeared in the feisty Mt. Washington Press, personally edited by eminently renowned publisher Dennis Nichols on March 18, 1981.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (THE ODIOUS OCTEGENARIAN), a special St. Patrick’s Day offering from his latest book, “Love Poems for the Horny Hibernians”:
As you wander the valley of life
May your troubles give you a pass.
And now and then a friendly wind
Will blow gently up your ass.
THE MUCK STOPS HERE: A & E’s new reality series “Sluts in the Suburbs” is a show about neighbors and friends who attend parties as married couples for the purpose of switching spouses and having sex. Over at Citizens for Community Values, Phil Burr-ass says, whatever you do, Jesus will know if you’re watching it next Sunday, March 22 at 10:00 pm.
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says Reuters report the U.S. stock markets are in the midst of a “‘patient’ panic” ahead of Wednesday’s Federal Reserve statement, when many investors expect a change in the Fed’s language that would send the clearest signal yet that a rate hike is coming soon. Stocks may fall further if Fed Chair Janet Yellen drops a pledge to be “patient” about rate hikes in the Fed’s statement after the upcoming policy meeting. Most economists expect her to erase that word as a precursor to starting rate hikes in June, according to a Reuters Poll.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone willing to help himself from the stores of others.
This week Free-Grainers are wondering about that new T-shirt out there making the rounds. It says: “I am one of the people who pay for all the free stuff Obama gives you.” The only problem is, you have to pay for it. The FGP is again pleased to tell you about those Secret Senior Citizen Discounts at Rumpke. Call the Geezer Garbage Department at (513) 742-2900.
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press.
FINALLY AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF CONSERVATIVE AGENDA THIS WEEK, Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane about all those Backstabber nominations The Blower received for Backstabbing Politicians Day on March 15, and our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, “God must really like Backstabbers, because he made so many of them.”
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”
Monday (March 16) we’ll celebrating Heterosexual St. Patrick’s Day in Cincinnati, along with celebrating 676 more days of bad government remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless he’s impeached.
Tuesday (March 17) we’ll be celebrating Ohio Senator Rob “Fighting for Same Sex Marriage” Portman’s two-year anniversary of announcing his son had been afflicted by The Gayness, and we’ll see what our Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers have to say about that.
Wednesday (March 18), The Blower will still be checking to see if Obama’s declared War on Israel.
Thursday (March 19) will be our Official “Remembering Shock and Awe” E-dition, and while we’re advising Republicans should use the same strategery on Obama today
The first line of Friday’s (March 20) limerick is: “Today is BB&BJ Day.”
And Saturday (March 21) we’ll be checking to see if Spring has really arrived in the Tri-State.
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Wussie RINOs!
Also Remember
We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Hamilton County’s Disingenuous Double-Dipping Democrat Auditor, who still hasn’t explained exactly how his office came up with its Fair Property Values for your Jacked-Up Property Taxes that were due on Ground Hog’s Day. But you may still file a formal complaint with the Hamilton County Board of Revision until March 31. Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception shows us what that might look like.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Video of the Day
How Liberal Journalists Think
(Sent in by Women’s History Month Faux Facebook Friend Pat Havlik Stern, [442 Friends, 18 Mutual Friends], Retired Executive Director at Intercommunity Cable Regulatory Commission.
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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