Saturday, February 28, 2015
It Only Seemed Like the Longest 28 Days in History
Now that #If Black Lives Really Mattered History Month is finally almost over, everybody’s wondering when it’ll be “White History Month.”
Probably never, since we now have to pander to all those other minority groups. For example, March is now officially One-Eyed Hunchback Lithuanian Lesbians History Month, and WLW Hate Radio trash talker Bill Cunningham says, “Now that February is over, maybe we can use the word ‘niggardly’ again without being called racists.”
And with this year’s #If Black Lives Really Mattered Month (now called “Half-Black History Month” in honor of the current resident at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue) only 28 days long, several Black Guys still didn’t get their “profiles” in The Fishwrap. To deserving darkies like Nate “Rhymes with Hate” Livingston, “Buckwheat” Blackwell, and Ken “Mad Dawg” Lawson, Metro Mole says one of Skaggie Maggie’s minions is now writing his sincerest apologies. Maybe that’s why she got her sorry ass fired!
However all month at the end of every aisle at your Kroger grocery store, you saw a photograph and biography of a black person. In Hyde Park, these were just about the only black people inside the entire store.
Even The Blower ran out of days this month and couldn’t run a Black History Month Racial Healing Profile for That Corrupt Evicted Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Bought-and-paid-For Tax-and-Spend Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s eviler twin sister Jennifer Black.
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry, according to all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Voters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, who would rather ride to downtown Cincinnati on a bus and stand in line for three hours to vote, than mail in absentee ballots.
Also Before the End of the Month
Squeaker John Boehner’s House Republican leaders are trying to pass a stopgap funding bill to prevent being blamed for an imminent partial shutdown of the Homeland Security Department, as RINOs in the Senate will struggle to reach a long-term cave-in deal after passing a so-called “clean” bill to fund the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) 68-31 on Friday, less than a day before the department was poised to run out of money. We can hardly wait to see which RINO Surrender Monkeys in the Senate waved the white flag. By the way, we’ll be watching the DemocRATS renege on the deal and refuse to allow a vote on preventing Obama’s Illegal Amnesty. You’d think those RINOs would’ve learned from watching cartoons when they were little and Wimpy promised to pay for that hamburger next Tuesday.
UPDATE
Friday afternoon there was chaos in Congress when House Republican leaders failed to squeeze out a short-term victory, after the chamber rejected a three-week funding measure that would prevent the Homeland Security Department from shutting down at midnight. All of which really doesn’t matter, since Disingenuous DemocRAT Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid has vowed to block a conference committee over DHS funding, fearing that it could lead to immigration riders being attached again. Still, Senators voted Friday night to pass a short-term spending bill, less than four hours before the department ran of money, so of course we’ll be back here again next week.
More Fake Local News
Chaos in Columbus
Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Ohio Republicans appear to be laying in wait for Disingenuous DemocRAT Former Gayvener Ted Strickland’s return to Ohio to run against Senator Rob “Fighting for Same Sex Marriages” Portman. They say we shouldn’t forget Strickland’s disastrous four years as governor of our state: 350,000 lost jobs, $8 billion in budget deficits and a true lack of leadership. Go to RetreadTed.com to learn more about Ted’s record.
Melancholy at the Morgue
Oh, boo-hoo! The Hamilton County Coroner, who was chosen because she is an Indian, to replace the dead Indian previous coroner, is whining about the county commissioners’ unanimous decision not to accept the old Mercy hospital in Mt. Airy for an expanded coroner’s lab.
Sammarco, who can’t do any autopsies because she isn’t qualified to do so as a radiologist, wants 100,000 square feet of space. Don’t we all, Lakshmi!
You may recall this is the same coroner Sammarco who dragged her feet and played dumb for ten months before giving a highly-criticized cause of death of “undetermined” in the death of U.C. student Everett Howard, Jr. who died of heart failure in 2013, hours after being tasered by U.C. campus police. Wasn’t Sammarco pulling that “undetermined” caper because she thought U.C. would finance and build her a new lab ? We guess you’ll have to go back to U.C. with your hat in hand yet again, Doctor Sammarco.
Insanity in Northern Kentucky
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says that Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (including the Lisa Wells WLW Fan Club) couldn’t stop laughing this week when they heard Channel 9 “Substantially True” News was reporting “Crazy Eric” is now suing the Kentucky Bar Association for damages and reinstatement of his law license.
Noted Whistleblower Psychiatrist Adler Jung says it’s not really surprising. “Crazy Eric is extremely unhappy because as a narcissist he’s not getting the media attention and public love he thinks he’s entitled to. He even says that lesser men than he would have crumbled. This is a kamikaze dive, doomed to end in a spectacular, fiery crash.”
A well-known Northern Kentucky Public Official says, “Eric Deters is just like herpes… He never goes away.” Eric’s fortunes too a real turn for the worse when he unsuccessfully tried to sue Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane for defamation of character a few years ago.
Troubled Tort-Fighter Tino Delgato says Bull Dog Deters should be allowed to practice law as long as it is in Cuba. That is one locale he would fit in. Plus he could open another restaurant; this time with $tan Che$ley. They could establish a new firm there aptly named Dewey, Cheatum and Howe. Go Figure!!!
And The Blower wonders when the judge will schedule a commitment hearing scheduled for “Crazy Eric.”
Internet Neutrality
At yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about all that “Net Neutrality” BS that’s supposed to make access to the Internet equal for everybody, just like it says in the Constitution.
“It’s already working,” Kane explained. Last night I received an e-mail from the DemocRAT Senate Campaign Committee thanking me for being one of their strongest DemocRAT supporters they have but saying they we were surprised to see that I hadn’t renewed my DSCC membership for 2015 yet: [DSCC Membership Status: pending 2015 Membership Rate: $5 (renew now)]
“And minutes later, an e-mail from Alison at GOP.Com informed me that I only had 24 hours left to confirm my 2015 Sustaining Membership with the Republican National Committee and receive your membership card in the mail. This would be the most important action I could take today to have a direct and lasting impact on GOP victories in 2015, 2016 and beyond.”
“But thanks to Obama’s new Internet Neutrality rules,” Kane added, “I didn’t experience even a smidgen of guilt when I trashed those fundraising e-mails from both political parties.”
TODAY’s BEST “LIBERAL LIAR” AWARD GOES TO
Dishonest DemocRAT Kentucky Congressman John Yarmuth, who plans to join Obama’s Doofus Vice President Joe Biden’s Obama Administration-Sponsored Boycott of Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s controversial speech to a joint session of Congress next Tuesday.
In his March 3 speech, Netanyahu is expected to criticize the White House’s negotiations on Iran’s nuclear program, which would allow Iran to develop a nuclear bomb to destroy Israel.
“We know what he is going to say,” Yarmulke John claimed said in a statement. Is there anything so disgraceful as a Jew-hating Jew?
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“Gripe” by James Jay Schifrin
Last week, I got another irate phone call from Commissioner Swindle in Patronage County.
“Why do you always gripe about the way politicians steal taxpayers’ money,” he asked. “Gripe, gripe, gripe—all you ever do is gripe!”
I guess it’s like my old daddy always said, “If at first you don’t succeed, gripe, gripe, again.”
Maybe I do gripe a lot. But griping is a fundamental freedom guaranteed in the Bill of Rights. Throughout our nation’s history, griping has been as fundamental as baseball, apple pie, hot dogs, and Toyotas.
When Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, he affirmed that people are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of griping.
In the midst of naval battle, John Paul Jones swore, “I have not yet begun to gripe.”
Nathan Hale regretted that he had but one gripe to give for his country.
Patrick Henry agreed when he shouted, “Give me liberty, or I’ll gripe.”
Abraham Lincoln griped all the way to Gettysburg. Reading from the back of an envelope, the old railsplitter predicted, “Griping of the people, by the people, and for the people will not perish from this earth.”
Teddy Roosevelt said, “Walk softly, but carry a big gripe.”
Calvin Coolidge said, “I choose not to gripe.”
General MacArthur said,” Old soldiers never die, they just gripe.”
At his inauguration, John Kennedy said, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but how much you can gripe about what your country can do for you.”
Neil Armstrong, setting foot on the moon, said, “One small step for man, one giant gripe for mankind.”
Avis became number two by griping harder.
And don’t you just love it when every bank teller and sales clerk tells you to “have a nice gripe?”
To gripe or not to gripe—that is the question. These are the times that gripe men’s souls. What this country needs is a good five-cent gripe! United we gripe, divided we fall.
So the next time you see something wrong, like politicians stealing your money, just don’t sit there—gripe.
This op-ed column first appeared in the feisty Mt. Washington Press on February 25, 1981.
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