Sunday, February 15, 2015

The Whistleblower Week in Review    

• MONDAY (February 9), in our Special “Early 2016 Election Focus Group” E-dition, The Blower said, “Best of Luck Figuring Our Which Candidates’ Lies to Believe!”

• TUESDAY (February 10), our Special “Lying Newsmen on TV” E-dition said, “Brian Williams is now almost as untrustworthy as the news networks reporting on him.”

• WEDNESDAY (February 11), our Special “More Liberal Lies” E-dition said, “And the Lies Just Keep on Coming!”

• THURSDAY (February 12), our Annual “Lincoln’s Birthday” E-dition said, “You can fool some of the Republicans all of the time!”

• FRIDAY (February 13) in our “Just Another Guest Column E-dition, The Blower wished everybody a Happy Friday the 13th!”

• AND SATURDAY (February 14) we had two E-ditions. In our Special “Rudolph Valentino’s Birthday” E-dition, The Blower said, “Obama was still blaming Bush for the high price of Valentines,” and in our Special “Sorry I Forgot Valentine’s Day” E-dition, we said, “Did Al Capone know how to celebrate St. Valentine’s Day or what!”

This Week’s Top Stories

• OUR NUMBER ONE STUPID LIBERAL LIAR AWARD COMMITTEE STORY THIS WEEK was when the Obama Administration really hit the trifecta On Wednesday. First, Obama’s White House Propaganda Minister Josh Earnest said “Climate Change is a bigger threat to America than Terrorism.”

• OUR NUMBER TWO STUPID LIBERAL LIAR AWARD COMMITTEE STORY THIS WEEK was when at the State Department, Jen Psaki backed Earnest’s “random” talking point, claiming Jews “Were Not Specifically Targeted” during the Muslim Terrorist Attack on that Kosher Deli in Paris.

• AND OUR NUMBER STUPID THREE LIBERAL LIAR AWARD COMMITTEE STORY THIS WEEK was when Obama Advisor David AxelDouche admitted in his new book (Believer: My Forty Years in Politics) that Obama misled Americans for his own political benefit when he

Not that any of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, would give a big rat’s ass!

THIS WEEK’S BEST BLASTING OBAMA’S BUREAUCRATS AWARD GOES TO

Obama Veterans Affairs Secretary Robert McDonald, who on Wednesday asked a Republican lawmaker who had served in both Iraq wars, “What have you done?” after Colorado Congressman Mike Coffman criticized our ousted former P&G CEO about construction delays and cost increases at a long-delayed hospital project. After a few minutes of arguing, McDonald snapped at Coffman: “I’ve run a large company, sir. What have you done?” Coffman, an Army veteran, did not respond at the hearing. But the four-term lawmaker said in a statement later that he could tell McDonald a few things he hasn’t done: “I have never run a federal agency that tolerates corruption the way the VA has. I’ve never built a hospital that’s years behind schedule and hundreds of millions over budget. And I’ve never been a shill for inept bureaucrats who allowed American heroes to die on a medical waiting list,” Coffman said.

 Edward Cropper’s World

Today PHOTO-SHOP EDITORIAL SPOOFER EDWARD CROPPER shows us a picture of our Supreme Court Justices after Ruth Buzzy Ginzsburg admitted she wasn’t 100% sober during Obama’s latest State of Disunion Address. You can see more of Mr. Cropper’s fine work HERE.

This Week’s Top Item On The Conservative Agenda

 Our Anonymous WordPress Wizard changed the appearance of our web page Thursday morning, actually improving it from the way it looked before The Blower’s Christmas Eve Hack Attack. It even has one of those silly little Social Media “Like” things at the bottom of the page our Media and Culture Blogger said we had to include, but only Persons of Consequence are permitted to push it. The last time we looked we had one freaking “Like,” and that was ours.

Racial Healing Update

 Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane says he’s really proud he was that he and his brother from a different mother Buckwheat Blackwell are again finalists for this year’s Ebony and Ivory Racial Healing Awards during Black History Month (sometimes called Half-Black History Month in honor Obama and other times called #If Black Lives Really Mattered History Month in honor of Obama’s Protesters), and Award-winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception thinks those guys have a pretty good chance. 

Whistleblower War on Political Correctness

          Now let’s see how Political Correctness has infected the Valentines’ Day greet card industry.

They have Valentines for people you like and Valentines for people you hate. They have old-fashioned Valentines, contemporary Valentines, Miss Vicki Valentines, Archie and Amanda Valentines, Miss Piggy Valentines, Bill Clinton Heart Surgery Valentines, same-sex Valentines, Ragu Pizza Quick Sauce Valentines, Valentines for people with Ghiz all over their faces, and even Valentines for That Out-of-Office, Corrupt, Evicted, Lying, Plagiarizing, Meddling, Overblown, Bought-And-Paid-For, Tax-And-Spend, Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-In-A-Ditch Mean Jean Schmidt, Valentines from the Auditor’s office showing you how much they just jacked up your property values, Valentines for Sheriff’s Department Employee Mickey Esposito currently ensconced in prison, Valentines that say “Thank You For Not Masturbating in My Car” for Disgraced Former Anderson Township Trustees, and free-home delivery of Valentine’s Day dildos from Patty Brisben’s Dildo World for uptight bitches in Fort Mitchell who fake their orgasms and Strauss & Troy secretaries spouses. But the one we liked best was the one from Obama that said, “Roses are red. Violets are blue. I’ll raise you taxes and there’s nothing you can do.”

More Valentines From the Obama Administration

The Feck Stops Here

 JimRomenesko.Com reports this catchy headline in The Fishwrap’s coverage of Doctor Froeich’s Finger this week, which has shed all pretense of being a “G-rated” oops, family newspaper.

The Blower would’ve probably told readers about all those times the Depraved Doctor used his penis instead.

Perverted Physicians has now been officially added to The Fishwrap’s Liberal Agenda along with last week’s local Corpsefuckers, to be included with PC (If It’s Politically Correct, You Can’t Object), Tree Hugging, Keeping People From Smoking, Diversity Uber Alles, Unions Blues, Fanatical Feminists, Supporting Sodomy Rites, Global Warming: G-Uncontrol, Liberal Brainwashing In Schools, Voting Rights For People Who Are Too Stupid To Vote, Streetcars, Scalping the Washington Redskins, and Giving Away Free Stuff With Your Money. 

But why should any of this surprise you? After all, don’t our Feckless Fishwrappers always say:  It’s not Baseball, Mom, or Apple Pie that have always made our area great, it’s our “Fingerfucking Diversity.”

Meanwhile, other current items on The Conservative Agenda will just have to wait, including: Obama’s Leadership, The Clinton Legacy, Other Dishonest Democrats, Obama’s Secret Service, Biden’s Blunders, Obama Supporters In The Press, DemocRATS In Disarray, Polling For Trolls, Veterans, Racial Healing, Amnesty For Future DemocRATS, Baby Killing, and Making Sure Not To Hurt The Feelings Of All Those Murdering Muslim Bastards.

Another Item from The Cincinnati Mess (You Only Read About in The Blower)

The Cincinnati Police Department promoted four officers to Lieutenant and seven to Sergeant on Friday. This is always a very big deal within the police division to promote those who have worked so hard for their promotion.  So, guess who was obviously absent from the ceremony, the police chief! There was no explanation of where he was or why he failed to show.  But after all, Friday is always his getaway day to get to his full-time residence in Columbus, Ohio.

All three Assistance Chief’s had the forethought of attending along with former Police Chief Tom Streicher.

Everyone was asking the same question about the Chief, which seems to be heard on an endless basis – “Where in the hell is Blackwell?” A promotion ceremony is one of the most important occasions in the police department.  The agency celebrates the individual efforts and family sacrifices of each person who is promoted, while emphasizing how critically important these positions are to the department and the community.  Family members are recognized and thanked for their continuous support.

All in attendance consider these ceremonies as highlights in the department’s history, as well as, significant benchmarks in the officers’ careers.  The Blower believes everybody in attendance was flabbergasted by Chief Blackwell’s absence and even more so by the absence of any explanation as to his whereabouts. Sadly, his failed leadership has come to be expected and is considered the “new normal” by the majority of the police department.

In Northern Kentucky

Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says everybody in Washington is watching to see if RINO Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell change the Senate rules to reverse Obama’s illegal executive action granting Amnesty to Illegal Aliens. If House Conservatives get their way, McConnell would change the rules for passing spending bills in the Senate to require a one-vote majority, according to a report from thehill.com. The rule change would make it impossible for Disingenuous DemocRAT senators to filibuster. Using the “nuclear option” has come up in the past when D-RATS controlled the Senate as a way to avoid filibusters from the likes of Kentucky’s Real Republican Senator Rand Paul and TEA Party Texas Senator Ted Cruz, but wasn’t utilized, because Republicans always caved in.

The question is: Does McConnell have the Balls?

More Politics Unusual

• HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says according to the History Channel, on this date in 1898, a massive explosion of unknown origin sunk the battleship USS Maine in Cuba’s Havana harbor, killing 260 of the fewer than 400 American crew members aboard. An official U.S. government inquiry has still not affixed the blame.

• THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose “Remember the Maine, to Hell with Spain!” That phrase became a rallying cry for action, which came with the Spanish-American War later that year. While the sinking of the Maine was not a direct cause for action, it served as a catalyst, accelerating the approach to a diplomatic impasse between the U.S. and Spain. Had this happened today, Obama and John Kerry would still be negotiating.

• THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says this week Obama asked Congress to authorize more military force against ISIS up to and including the use of combat troops, but are most Americans willing to go that far? Also on the speaking front, the president proposed $74 billion in new spending in his State of the Union address last month, and Republicans predictably said, no way. But it appears DemocRATS weren’t strongly persuaded either.  Congress at week’s end sent a bill to the president calling for construction of the long-delayed Keystone XL oil pipeline from western Canada to Texas, but Obama has vowed to veto it. Voters wish he wouldn’t. Voters also remain opposed to the president’s decision to give Amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants.

• OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Conan O’Brien’s “NBC has suspended Brian Williams for six months without pay. Williams said he’s not worried because soon his veterans benefits will kick in.”

• RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: It’s as if we have forgotten why we celebrate Black History Month in the first place. Historian Dr. Carter G. Woodson established “Negro History Week” in 1926 as a means to highlight the contributions of African-Americans and the development of Black studies. In a time where Blacks were conspicuously left out of the history books, Woodson’s vision gave African-Americans a pathway to their roots. In 1976, President Gerald R. Ford expanded Negro History Week to cover the entire month of February.

• LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” it says during Black History Month (formerly known as February), always refer to it as “Fake History Month.” Then explain that you refuse to support a racist event which essentially demeans African Americans by subtly implying that they are too bigoted and dumb to relate to any historical event which doesn’t involve people with the right skin tone.

• GOING GALT means taking the John Galt Pledge. Let’s all say it together: “I swear by my life, and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”  

• IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “BE MY VALENTINE,” We learned the real meaning behind Valentine’s Day. That op-ed column first appeared in the legendary Mt. Washington Press on February 10, 1982.

PLAGIARISM ALERT: Several Persons of Consequence noticed a tremendous similarity between this week’s Patronage County column entitled “Be My Valentine” published 33 years ago and Saturday’s “Valentine’s Daze” E-dition. Many of the words and phrases appear to have been copied verbatim, which means “word-for-word” for all our Failed Cincinnati Public Schools and Forrest Gump Schools graduates. Is it possible that somebody at The Whistleblower-Newswire pilfered the prose from that little-known op-ed columnist at the Mt. Washington Press for his own purposes? Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane says you may be sure we will be getting to the bottom of it. 

• NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (THE ODIOUS OCTEGENARIAN): This poem appears in his “Sentimental Poems of Presidential Birthdays,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves. 

Ode to Presidents’ Days
George Washington, your day is through.
Abe Lincoln, you are done.
Instead of honoring your birthdays,
We just have retail fun.

• THE MUCK STOPS HERE: Over at Citizens for Community Values, Phil Burr-ass is unhappy that Republican U.S. House Speaker John Boehner, R-West Chester, said recently that lawmakers will wait for the court to make a decision – and not try to intervene. Burr-ass, a Boehner constituent, said he was disappointed that Boehner’s attitude is to “hide behind a judge.” Burr-ass threatened elected officials who turn their back on “traditional” marriage will pay the price in the future at the ballot box.  Meanwhile, Ohio U.S. Senator Rob “Fighting for Fagellas” Portman says, “Phil Burr-ass can go piss up a rope!”

• WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says Reuters reports U.S. stocks are poised for more upward momentum even as uncertainty over oil prices and Greek debt negotiations keeps the market on tenterhooks. After starting 2015 with its sharpest monthly drop in a year and a spike in volatility, the benchmark S&P 500 .SPX hit an intraday record on Friday while the Dow Jones Industrial Average .DJI reached its highest point so far this year, which is why The Blower says, “Hold on, it’s going to be a bumpy ride!” 

• THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone willing to help himself from the stores of others. For his last two years in office, Obama plans to be Santa Claus, giving everyone everything they want — for free.

Fresh from offering “free” health care, “free” phones and “free” food to the masses, he’s upped the bribery to “free” community college tuition and “free” child care. Since someone has to pay for these expensive, new entitlements to the Free Stuff Army, Obama has proposed yet another “tax the rich” scheme that, that will never be enacted would eventually plunder working-class families. To liberals, that’s what tax “reform” is all about. Over a few decades, the U.S. government has morphed into a gigantic income-redistribution machine, the ultimate mugger.        

Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.

Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice.

• FINALLY AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF CONSERVATIVE AGENDA THIS WEEK, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why The Blower was changing the name of its weekly Political Correctness Report IN THE Weekend E-dition from “PC Running Amok” to “The Whistleblower’s War on Political Correctness.”  “It’s just like what that old proverb says, “Kane explained, “Drastic times call for drastic measures.”

Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower.

THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL

Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.

                   

SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE

e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.

AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:

• Monday (February 16) we’ll be celebrating Presidents Daze, and we’ll be predicting 704 more days of bad government remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless he’s impeached.

• Tuesday (February 17) we’ll we covering the real Mardi Gras in New Orleans, and we’ll see what our Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers have to say about that.

• Wednesday (February 18) in our Special “Ash Wednesday”  E-dition, The Blower will be asking, “Are Most Americans Giving Up Hope Again For Lent This Year?”

• Thursday (February 19) we’ll probably be partying like it’s 4712 as we celebrate the Year of the Sheep to usher in the Chinese New Year during a Bribe Lunch at the Hibachi Grille.

• The first line of Friday’s (February 21) limerick is: “The best part about Dead Presidents Day.”

• And Saturday (February 21) we’ll be getting ready to celebrate the Real Washington’s Birthday on Sunday, because The Blower believes the Father of Our Country deserves a holiday of his own.

Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially REAL RACISTS!

 And Also Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Hamilton County’s Disingenuous Double-Dipping Democrat Auditor, who still hasn’t explained exactly how his office came up with its Fair Property Values for your Jacked-Up Property Taxes. Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception shows us what might happen if you file a complaint with the Auditor’s Board of Revision.

WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE

e-mail your revolutionary recaps today

Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more. 

Whistleblower Video of the Day

Judge Jeanine Pirro: ‘2016 Can’t Come Soon Enough’ 2-8-2014

Published on Feb 14, 2014″There’s something about being an American, a sense of pride, confidence, the wind always at your back, even when you’re in a foreign country,” Judge Jeanine Pirro said in her Opening Statement. “Kind of like a guardian angel watching over you or the cavalry riding in to protect you. At least, that’s the narrative I grew up with.” “This week, Obama said he did everything he could to protect Americans in Benghazi…”

 PLUS

There’s a Muslim Living in the White House

Published on Feb 3, 2015: As a follow up to the smash hit, “There’s a Communist Living in the White House,” we have had 7 years to accumulate more information about the mysterious man who was voted into office by the uninformed masses, the deceived and those voters living off of the government who simply want “free stuff”. TV commentators keep asking, “Why is Obama releasing dangerous terrorists?” and “Why won’t he call it what it is?” Maybe because he is one of them. Maybe he is our enemy. Maybe Obama is a Muslim Jihadist. What’s the difference between a Muslim and a Jihadist? If you follow Mohammed, you follow Mohammed.

 Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

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