One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Happy Birthday to the Old Rail-Splitter

• Hurley the Historian says today is Lincoln’s real birthday, and to celebrate that occasion in 1999, the DemocRAT Controlled U.S. Senate voted to acquit Pants-Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton on his impeachment charges of perjury and obstruction of justice.
• In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo wonders if any of our local Kneepad Liberals in the Press will remember any of this when our Peyronie’s President campaigns in 2016 for Hillary’s equally foolish attempt to get elected president.
• Our Quote for Today Committee’s selection by Abraham Lincoln should come as no surprise: “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” Back then, however, Honest Abe could’ve never imagined today’s Republicans in Congress, who appear ready, willing, and able to cave in to Obama one more time.
• Meanwhile, NBC News has suspended Superstar Celebrity Anchor Brian Williams for six months without pay for trying to fool people for more than 12 years with the same lie about coming under fire in Iraq. He should’ve remembered NBC’s policy limiting lies to only ten years and who believes Brian is really not on the air for six months and he’ll be “more truthful” when he returns?

• But today, what will make this Thursday all the more historic will be when Obama tries to fool all of the people one more time with his annual Lincoln’s Birthday Greetings, so Obama Supporters in the Press can spin favorable comparisons of Obama and wonder aloud when Obama’s likeness will be added to Mount Rushmore.
• Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Senate Republicans now face a tough vote on Obama’s Attorney General nominee Loretta Lynch’s confirmation, which has fast become a litmus test on President Obama’s executive actions on immigration. Meanwhile, RINOs in the Senate like Lindsey Graham proved how often he could be fooled when he told Obama’s Black Liberal Replacement for Disgraced Black Attorney General Eric Holder that advocating Partial-Birth Abortion didn’t disqualify Loretta Lynch from serving as Attorney General.
• So there’s little to worry about for all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters who gave Obama another four years to ruin the country in 2012. They can still look forward to enjoying the next 707 days of America’s Dark Ages during Obama’s Second Term (unless he’s impeached).
• How many of you remember Obama’s Annual Messianic Message first delivered at Obama’s First State of Dis-Union Address in 2009? The Fishwrap’s front-page White House Approved headline said it all: “We will recover,” Obama declares.
• It was no wonder Award-Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception said he felt so secure all of a sudden.
• Whistleblower Presidential Historian Dorian Grady says it would’ve been nice if the Media’s Messiah had ever explained “how and when” or even “how much Obama’s Recovery would cost.” In every one of Obama’s Annual State of Dis-Union Addressees, not a single speech revealed a clue about how his administration would help people find jobs and grow the economy. Unfortunately, but not unexpectedly, during the first five years, not a single one of Obama’s cockamamie Liberal ideas worked. Even more unfortunately, all those Obama Supporters have afflicted the rest of us with three more years of failure.
• These days, TEA Party Patriots are attempting to rally their members to call Republican Senators already running for re-election in 2016 and ask them not to go on recess next week until they force Disingenuous DemocRATS to stop Obama’s executive amnesty. Last week, new Senate Majority Leader, Mitch McConnell, held a series of votes to proceed to debate the House passed HR 240, which would fund the Department of Homeland Security and block the President’s illegal executive amnesty. The measure – which needs 60 votes to pass – was defeated every time by Harry Reid and the Senate Dems. They are willing to gamble the nation’s security to protect Obama’s illegal action. The Senate is scheduled to be in recess next week for the Presidents’ Day holiday, but Republicans need to tell the D-RATS “NO RECESS FOR YOU until you DO YOUR JOB!”
• FOOL’S ERRAND UPDATES: Speaking of people you can fool every time, Gullible Republicans hereabouts remember last year at this time when Hamilton County RINO Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop was tweeting every five minutes about his incredible efforts to bring the 2016 Republican National Convention to Cincinnati. Welcome to Loserville, Population: YOU! 
• FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATRIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about all those Lincoln-Obama comparisons you’ll be hearing from our Obama Supporters in the Press today, and Kane asked the group where they were eight years ago this week and reminded them about that moment eight years ago on Tuesday in the Land of Lincoln when 15,000 freezing souls stood watching then U.S. Senator Barack Hussein Obama announce his seemingly Quixotic run for president. DemocRATS in the scrum included Joe Biden, Hillary Rodham Clinton, Christopher Dodd, John Edwards, Mike Gravel, Dennis Kucinich, Bill Richardson and Tom Vilsack. “Just think,” Kane imagined, “could the country have been any worse off today had one of those other Dishonest DemocRATS been elected? President Kucinich probably even would’ve been an improvemen.” 

TODAY’S WEEK’S BEST “LIBERAL LIAR” AWARD GOES TO

Obama’s Doofus Vice President Joe Biden, who during an event for lawmakers and disability advocates who helped pass the ABLE Act, said, “I actually think it’s [Congress] an equal branch of government.” See, we told you Dennis Kucinich would’ve been an improvement.

Bluegrass Birthrights

Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says our Kentucky born 16th President’s birthday is today, and he’s waiting for the inevitable comparisons between the old rail-splitter and Obama by our Obama Supporters in the Press. So with a little help from Hurley the Historian, we present these similarities and contrasts:    

1. Lincoln placed his hand on the Bible for his inauguration. Obama used the same Bible.

2. Lincoln came from Illinois. Obama comes from Illinois.

3. Lincoln served in the Illinois Legislature. Obama served in the Illinois Legislature.

4. Lincoln had very little experience before becoming President. Obama had very little experience before becoming President. 

5. Lincoln rode the train from Philadelphia to Washington for his inauguration. Obama rode the train from Philadelphia to Washington for his inauguration.

6. Lincoln was a skinny lawyer. Obama is a skinny lawyer.

7. Lincoln was a Republican. Obama is a skinny lawyer. ${USER_DISPLAY_NAME}

8. Lincoln was in the United States military. Obama is a skinny lawyer.

9. Lincoln believed in everyone carrying their own weight. Obama is a skinny lawyer. 

10. Lincoln did not waste over-taxed payers’ money on personal enjoyments. Obama is a skinny lawyer.

11. Lincoln was highly respected. Obama is a skinny lawyer.

12. Lincoln was born in the United States. Obama is a skinny lawyer. 

13. Lincoln was honest, so honest he was called Honest Abe. Obama is a skinny lawyer.

14. Lincoln saved the United States. Obama is a skinny lawyer. 

          Amazing, isn’t it?

More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our February fund-raising drive by the “Honest Abe’s” Auto Sales, exploiting the 16th president every day just like if was that President’s Day 365 Days a year. 

LINCOLN’S SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY HOT LINE

e-mail us your favorite rail-splitter jokes today. 

Some really historically inaccurate items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally really historically inaccurate items subscribers.

Whistleblower Video of the Day

Abraham Lincoln Tribute

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 Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

Whitest Kids U Know: Sic Semper Tyrannis

Abe Lincoln GEICO Commercial

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