Wednesday, July 2, 2014
What a Difference a Year Makes
Think of how much things have changed since the first week in June, 2013. Last year, Liberals were all celebrating cheering the Supreme Court rulings that promoted gay marriage. They felt it would bring the country one step closer to what they call “Real Marriage Equality,” which means that any collection of at least two or more adults should have the right to marry each other. This includes a bisexual marriage of three, polygamy, group marriages, and incest marriages. Since the Supreme Court said, in the name of equality, that all marriages must be treated equally, how will they be able to reject honoring these sacred marriages along with all the others? Equality means equality. And where in the Constitution does it say only two people can be married to each other at the same time?
This year Fox News Guy Chris Stirewalt says so far, 2014 is shaping to be the worst year of President Obama’s tenure. The economy is bad, scotching a DemocRAT plan to hold the Senate majority by touting the long-awaited economic recovery. The Supreme Court, which once spared Obama’s signature health insurance law, has turned from friend to foe. Justices have issued setback after setback to the president, his allies in government worker unions and to his argument that legislative gridlock allows him to broadly expand his powers. The grades are in, and the man who ran for office touting his status as a constitutional lawyer flunked this term. Obama is trying to get back to even on the scandal that rocked the Department of Veterans Affairs, meanwhile those other lingering scandals, particularly the targeting of Obama’s political enemies by the IRS, have gotten new life instead of fading away. Oh yeah, and we haven’t even talked about Obama’s disastrous foreign policy results.
Not only that, “Americans have less confidence in Obama’s administration than they did for George W. Bush’s at the same point in his presidency, according to a new Gallup survey.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN said on today’s date in 1964, President Lyndon B. Johnson signed the historic Civil Rights Act into law in a nationally televised ceremony at the White House. And today, our Kneepad Liberals in the Press are still making sure Republicans never get a bit of credit for all their hard work. But just to be “fair-and-balanced, all those media whores always neglect to mention that Al Gore’s dad and Dead DemocRAT Dean of the Senate Robert Byrd voted against Civil Rights for Darkies.
THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Black 2012 GOP Presidential Candidate Herman Cain’s “The DemocRATS co-opted the credit for the Civil Rights Act of 1964. But if you go back and look at the history, a larger percentage of Republicans voted for that than did DemocRATS. But a DemocRAT president signed it, so they co-opted credit for having passed the Civil Rights Act of 1964 and the Voting Rights Act of 1965.- WHITE GUYS LIKED FRIED CHICKEN TOO: At this time last year, everybody was getting ready for National Fried Chicken Day, a day to enjoy crisp and tasty, finger licking good fried chicken. And we don’t care if it does make us sound slightly racist, our Freebie Gourmet says, “Popeye’s do make some fine chicken. And wouldn’t you know, our Good Friend Bobby Leach says he prefers a big breast.
THE LATEST POLLS: Last year, Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen said according to Gallup, 71% of Americans thought the Founding Fathers would be disappointed by the United States these days. Did that mean they wouldn’t approve of Obama? Photo Spoofer Edward Cropper wasn’t sure.- CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET said last year now that Mickey Esposito, his wife Allison, and her son Adam had pled guilty to stealing drugs and jewelry from the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office Property Room, everybody was wondering how long the sentences would be when Wild and Crazy Hamilton County Judge Steve Martin sentenced them on July 29.
CH also wondered why The Blower hadn’t said anything about Sheriff “Jimmy” not doing anything about inmates doing drugs in the jail yet. The Fishwrap had reported that when five inmates on an OTR work detail came back to jail, one overdosed on heroin and four tested positive for cocaine. His solution was to stop all outside details rather than to order the deputies to do their jobs, like watching the inmates and searching them before they enter the jail. OTR had garbage/litter everywhere since it wasn’t being picked up by the work details. Plus the incompetence went even further. Word was the investigation of the incident was to speak to only one of the four surviving inmates. Also, the Sheriff was five million dollars over budget in the first six months of being on the job. He has already asked the commissioners for more money. If they didn’t give it him, he was threatening to cut patrols and say the commissioners are not for public safety. Of course, how can anyone get elected if they are not for public safety?
And how was this for a Courthouse Latrine-o-gram: Charlie Luken would be running against Chris Monzel in the next election.
IN DETROIT: Cincinnati’s Disgraced Former Fourteen-Star Police Chief James Craig promised to make the Motor City safe. Award-Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception imagined how that might come about.- MAYORAL MADNESS: The Hamilton County Board of Elections presented prospective mayoral candidate Stacy Smith with some very bad news on Monday last year. She didn’t get enough signatures because six pages of signatures from two of her petitioners were thrown out when it was discovered the petitioners were registered to vote in Saint Bernard, which they mistakenly believed was in the City of Cincinnati. That’s OK, residents of Saint Bernard still got to pay Cincinnati City Income Tax, if they worked in the City.
And everybody was wondering who paid Former Arizona Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords to campaign against gun violence while riding in the Always-Liberal-Friendly Northside 4th of July Parade. Maybe Foxy Roxy paid for it out of her office funds.
- LESBIANS ON TV: Ditzy DemocRAT State Rep-tile Connie “The Pillager” was on PMSNBC’s low-rated Rachel Madcow’s Lesbian News Show this last year week to promote Connie’s campaign for Ohio Treasurer. Those two ladies have so much in common.
REDS RAINOUT: the Reds may not have played baseball on the Fourth of July last year, and fireworks at King’s Island didn’t go boom, but our casino was packed! Our Card-Counting Cheat says cars were so stacked and packed around the place, many couldn’t get in.
Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall wondered if TV viewers who didn’t realize the Reds Fourth of July game had been postponed were surprised to see Homer Bailey pitching another ho-hitter following Thursday’s weather delay. And did Homer drop the “F-Bomb” again during his post-game interview?
- SOREHEADS IN THE SUBURBS: Our Colerain Confidante (probably not Colerain Trustee candidate Goofball Greg Insco) said normally he’d have been watching the Colerain fireworks last year but the Trustees took that away too and The Blower’s Faux Facebook “Friend” Rusty Nail said it was another reason to be voting for new Trustees last November. Just like cancelling the Colerain Township Summer Camp after 30 years, Ritter and Deters-Rinehart could’ve done the fireworks but they didn’t. It was strictly political because the Trustees didn’t want the summer camp and summer events as opportunities for the political opposition to use against them. They’d light off “some” fireworks after the Waste of Colerain in August. The Confidante said last time he checked July 4th is July 4th, NOT August! Don’t be surprised if the Ritter Regime asks you to celebrate Christmas in January too. RIDICULOUS!
- FROM THE GREAT WHITE NORTH: The Lebanon City School renewal levy was ready to be voted on. Over-Taxed Payers could vote against it at the Board of Elections (406 Justice Drive in Lebanon) between 8AM and 4:30 PM Monday thru Friday.
TALENTLESS IN THE TOWNSHIP: Registration for last year’s “Anderson’s Got Talent” at Greater Anderson Days had been extended until July 15.
And did somebody really suggest that teachers at the Forrest Gump Schools “give back” 5% of their salaries and benefits like Obama claimed he was doing, just because teachers’ incomes were 36% higher than the average median incomes in the district, and The Blower wondered if anybody would check to see if Obama kept that promise?
And did you hear about the Anderson Township trustee who scammed an area restaurant out of $15? Maybe it was the one trustee who always seemed to be in some sort of trouble.
And if you thought The Blower’s New Cyber-Spy Columnist Edward Snowden’s travel plans were hard to follow, you should’ve tried keeping track of Anderson’s Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen, who spoke at the Fourth of July event last year at Seward, Nebraska (wherever the hell that was.) Meanwhile, Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup was closing his personal gmail account. And you thought he never bothered to read your crappy e-mails before!
IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Our Clermont Crony said since it was revealed that Clermont County Communications Director Annette Meager had been given a job and was renting her apartment from one of the people who voted to give her that job, some were suggesting there may be have been more interesting information out there about Ms. Meager.- LOOK UP IN THE SKY: After those deaths at the Dayton air show last year this week, it was a little unnerving to have that B52 use our trees as its turning point for plane rides at Lunken. That monster plane was 100 feet over the tree tops off Salem. Not to worry, if your insurance covered plane crashes into your house. Angry Andersonians hated the air shows and B52 rides that disturb weekend relaxing in their swimming pools. Daily take offs before the sun came up were OK, but all day rumbling was like living in England during WWII.
- WHISTLEBLOWER GOSSIP COLUMNIST LINDA LIBEL said Hollywood actor Michael Douglas claimed he caught throat cancer by giving his wife oral sex. Was this a sound medical diagnosis, or was Douglas just the latest DemocRAT to blame everything on Bush?
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo wondered if Dipsy DemocRAT Alison Wondergams Grimes was a serious candidate for Desperate DemocRATS to run against Bitch McConnell for Kentucky’s U.S. Senate seat? Obviously, the McConnell campaign doesn’t think so.
And The CamBoozler said, “Yes, we were once again scooping The Fishwrap. In Campbell County, Ole Coach Coleman, the educator turned Rogers-Nolan-Voelker Library Hater, had announced a few weeks ago that he was running for county commission against Brian Woodman Painter. It seemed today that the old coach did not have a good game plan because, we kid you not, he didn’t even live in Painter’s district. The Bellevue Coach bombed again by following another Nutsy scheme.
Also in Campbell County, Judge Spendery hadn’t realized he was judge no-more, but you could read some desperation in his recent invitation. The tri-fold had over 100 names of just “hosts.” This would make someone assume that all of these folks were all in for $1,000 apiece. Even folks that lived in the area were saying, “What home would hold that many people or parking spots?” The funniest thing was that some of the folks on the invitation were not even supporters. Seems Spendery preferred “over-exaggerating” like other “overs” he was so fond of: over-taxing, over-spending, etc. Meanwhile, Give Em Hell Sell said folks would see the report after the next deadline and he might have a Spendery Over-Hosting and Over-Taxing party for all of the angry citizens over in Campbell County.
LOCAL LEGAL UPDATE: That Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Still Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (Including the Lisa Wells Fan Club) continued to be amused, especially after Crazy Eric claimed his bimbo client Sarah Jones was not a “greedy nut job” before the replay of her $11 million lawsuit against a gossip website the following week. Didn’t Crazy Eric get suspended again? Maybe he got a stay, but nobody really knows. The Blower couldn’t find a judge who’ll own up to signing off on it.
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about that note from Ohio TEA Party Guy Tom Zawistowski, who was complaining about how the mainstream news media was not only failing to capitalize the first letters of the words “Tea Party,” but were also not capitalizing the entire word “TEA.” since it has always stood for “Taxed Enough Already.” The Blower has always used “TEA Party,” ever since we helped publicize that first big “Taxed Enough Already” Rally on Fountain Square, back in 1990s. Other folks who haven’t gotten the word to capitalize “TEA Party” seem to include the Cincinnati Tea Party, Anderson Tea Party, Clermont Tea Party, Cincinnati East Tea Party, West Chester Tea Party, and the SouthWest Cincinnati Tea Party, wherever the hell that is.
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Mickey Esposito A687641, currently on a six-year sabbatical at the Southeastern Correctional Institution (wherever the hell that is).
Some of Today’s Better Political Cartoons This Time Last Year
NATIONAL FRIED CHICKEN DAY HOT LINE
E-mail your extra crispy orders today.
Some finger-licking good items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally finger-licking good, but we could always use more.
WHISTLEBLOWER LINK OF THE DAY
The Obamas After Dark
(Sent in by Julia A. Pierson, Director of the United States Secret Service, the first woman to head the male dominated agency.)
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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