Friday, June 27, 2014
Whacking Koskinen
Republicans are certainly having a lot of fun in D.C. these days, especially during Congressional Hearings when Obama-Donor IRS Commissioner John Koskinen keeps getting caught in more lies about how Obama’s IRS “Deliberately Destroyed” Lois Lerner’s e-mails. John Koskinen claims he really didn’t contribute $100,000 to Obama and the Devious DemocRATS. It was only $85,000.”
Obama Supporters in the Press are doing their best to cover it up, but they must not be doing their jobs, since Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says only 12% of Americans say “It Was an Accident,” and that includes all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice.
ABC and NBC continue to ignore the fact that Obama’s IRS didn’t follow the law, so maybe everybody’s listening to Rush Limbaugh these days.
Obama’s IRS targeted Conservative groups and the TEA Party, the NSA illegally spied on Americans, the Justice Department illegally wiretapped the press, and Obama’s Dishonest Attorney General Eric Holder committed multiple acts of perjury. At least two dozen scandals have rocked this presidency. When will enough be enough?
Now Let’s Meet Today’s Guest Editor:
Why, it’s none other than South Carolina Republican Congressman Trey Gowdy, who cut Obama-Donor IRS Commissioner John Koskinen’s balls off in a devastating example of what a good cross-examination sounds like. Monday night, Gowdy criticized Koskinen for having the unmitigated chutzpah to claim there’s no evidence of criminal misconduct at the IRS over the targeting scandal.
That’s why The Blower, which takes pride in rewarding anybody blasting Obama’s more than a smidgen of coruption to be this week’s guest editor and choose three items plus a Quickie for today’s E-dition from our Current Cadre of Conservative Columnists and Contributors, and our Quote for Today Committee chose Gowdy’s “Facts are neither Republican nor DemocRAT.”
- “TOP TEN OVER-TAXED PAYERS EXCUSES” by Steve Stockman
Last week, Texas Republican Congressman Steve Stockman introduced tongue-in-cheek legislation that would allow over-taxed payers “to offer the same flimsy, obviously made-up excuses the Obama administration uses.” Under Stockman’s bill, “The Dog Ate My Tax Receipts Act,” over-taxed payers who do not provide documents requested by the IRS can claim one of the following reasons:
1. The dog ate my tax receipts 2. Convenient, unexplained, miscellaneous computer malfunction 3. Traded documents for five terrorists 4. Burned for warmth while lost in the Yukon 5. Left on table in Hillary’s Book Room 6. Received water damage in the trunk of Ted Kennedy’s car 7. Forgot in gun case sold to Mexican drug lords 8. Forced to recycle by municipal Green Czar 9. Was short on toilet paper while camping 10. At this point, what difference does it make?
- “NO ATHIESTS IN FOXHOLES” by Ernie Pyle
If you look closely at this picture, you will note that all the Marines pictured are bowing their heads. That’s because they’re praying. This incident took place at a recent ceremony honoring the birthday of the corps, and it has the ACLU up in arms. “These are federal employees,” says Lucius Traveler, a spokesman for the ACLU, “on federal property and on federal time. For them to pray is clearly an establishment of religion, and we must nip this in the bud immediately.”
When asked about the ACLU’s charges, Colonel Jack Fessender, speaking for the Commandant of the Corps said (cleaned up a bit), “Screw the ACLU.” GOD Bless Our Warriors. Send the ACLU to Afghanistan!
Please send this to people you know so everyone will know how stupid the ACLU is getting when they try to remove GOD from everything and every place in America. May God Bless America, One Nation Under GOD!
What’s wrong with this picture?
Like an earlier e-mail about the alleged removal of cross-shaped headstones from cemeteries, The Blower has discovered that this item is a fabricated exaggeration of the American Civil Liberties Union’s (ACLU) stance on the overlap of government and religion. It doesn’t represent either a real event or a position the ACLU has taken, and the supposed spokespeople quoted — Marine Colonel Jack Fessender and ACLU spokesman Lucius Traveler — do not exist.
We have been advised that the ACLU also notes the falsity of this item in a web site FAQ entry: The ACLU has no knowledge about the photograph of Marines praying that has circulated on the Internet. The ACLU has also never had a spokesperson — quoted by news organizations as “Lucius Traveler” — by this name.
This is why people should always double-check the accuracy of all those e-mails they forward to their friends.
- “JESUS AND THE DEMOCRAT,” by Billy Graham
A Republican in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that Jesus sitting over there?” The waitress nodded “yes,” so the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.
The next patron to come in was a Libertarian with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, “Is that Jesus over there?” The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, “My treat.”
The third patron to come into the restaurant was a DemocRAT on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, “Hey there, honey! How’s about gettin’ me a cold glass of Miller Light?” He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, “Is that God’s boy over there?” The waitress once more nodded, so the DemocRAT directed her to give Jesus a cold glass of beer. “On my bill,” he said.
As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Republican felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.
Jesus also passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, “For your kindness, you are healed.” The Libertarian felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.
Then Jesus walked towards the DemocRAT. The DemocRAT jumped up and yelled, “Don’t touch me… I’m collecting disability.”
- AND A QUICKIE By Belligerent Black Blogger Nate “Rhymes With Hate” Livingston
At breakfast, a husband asks his wife, “What would you do if I won the Lottery?”
“I’d take half and leave you,” she says.
“Great!” he replies. “Here’s $6. I won $12 yesterday. Stay in touch, Bitch!”
These items are perfect to forward to all of your Internet Buddies and Facebook Friends with too much time on their hands.
Stories We’re Working On
SOTUS Unamously Rules Obama Not A King- Lerner Sought IRS Audit of Sitting GOP Senator
- Killer Bears in Montgomery
- Hunter calls Joe Deters A Vindictive Moutherfucker
- Gasoline in Northern Kentucky Tops $4 per Gallon
- Nudists in Florence
- For Whom the Bridge Tolls
Whistleblower Web Poll
This week, here’s why the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said Obama still hasn’t done anything about cleaning up his mess in Iraq: (A) The War on Terror has been won: 2% (B) Navy Seals had already killed Osama bin Laden: 1% (C) Obama’s Secretary of State John Kerry has everything under control: 1% (D) The 2014 Elections are still 130 days away: 96%
Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!
Some of Today’s Conservative Political Cartoons
Weekly Whistleblower Limerick Contest
Could It Possibly Be True?
This week, everybody who says Newsweek didn’t do Obama a favor when they called him “America’s First Gay President” because some of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, are stupid enough to believe Obama is actually afflicted with The Gayness, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is Gaywad Flamer, who says he’s not really homosexual, but he is willing to learn.
Gaywad wins a “LGBT for Obama” bumper sticker (It’s Fabulous!”), a chance for somebody to push his stool in at the next Log Cabin Republicans meeting, a Three Way with Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis, and an equal opportunity to walk in the next Gay Day Parade with the gay member of Cincinnati Clowncil of his choice. His winning entry is:
Obama now says it’s good to be gay, But he can’t help selling out: he was “born that way.” Barry gives new meaning to the term “sucking up” – Will he now fund-raise by giving head and a schtupp? Maybe he’ll resign before he sinks any lower, I pray.
And from the Anderson Laureate (whose old girlfriend’s gynecologist just found his high school ring):
Obama now says it’s good to be gay And blesses homos on their wedding day Gee, that’s not what he said Why isn’t his face red? Oh, I know. He did it to make political hay.
The first line of next week’s limerick is: “When we celebrate the Fourth of July”
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially our Smirking Gay Activist Judge Timothy Black, who strongly objects to the subject of this week’s Limerick Contest.
GAY MARRIAGE RULING HOT LINE
e-mail your rants and reactions today.
Some gay-disapproving items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally gay-disapproving subscribers.
Whistleblower Link of the Day
Let’s All Celebrate
(Sent in by Citizens for Community Value President Phil Burr-ass, who says “I never met a homophobe I didn’t like.”
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here
