Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers
Nothing says what’s right with Obama’s America like millions of under-employed, Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters watching multi-millionaire athletes inflict concussions on each other in-between scores of over-hyped $4 million 30-second TV commercials as the nation plunged further into debt, coming to you live from the MetLife Stadium, as Adipose Americans consumed 1.25 billion more chicken wings, 50 million pizza slices, and a little beer in sports bars across the country and at home. —The Moral Minority- Although two weeks ago Obama said that he would not let his son, if he existed, play pro football, Barack Obama marked Super Bowl Sunday by tweeting a picture of Barack Obama throwing a football like a girl. —Obama’s White House Press Dweeb Jay Cardboard
- I tried to throw in the towel during our humiliating 43-8 loss, but the other side woul’ve just intercepted that too. — Denver Bronco MVP Quarterback Peyton Manning
- After further review Peyton Manning did not have the normal Flu, he had BIRD FLU from too many Seahawks. Go Figure!!! —Trouble-making Tailgaiter Tino Delgato
During my pre-Super Bowl interview on Fox News, Obama said there was “not even a smidgen of corruption” behind the Internal Revenue Service’s targeting of conservative groups, and then he said, it all depends on what the meaning of “smidgeon is.” —Bill O’Reilly- Last week on the Chinese New Year, did anybody remember to send them a New Year’s card instead of our interest payment on the $1.3 Trillion we owe? —American Over-Taxed Payers
- Is this the Winter of Wall Street Discontent or what? The Dow was only down 326 points for starters this week on Monday. —Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes
On this date in 1789 the first U.S. president was elected by a real landslide when George Washington, the commander of the Continental Army during the Revolutionary War, got all 69 presidential electors’ votes. —Hurley the Historian- Maybe that’s why we chose GW’s “I walk on untrodden ground. There is scarcely any part of my conduct which may not hereafter be drawn into precedent.” —Our Quote for Today Committee
- Since Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow Sunday on Groundhog Day, that means you only have six more weeks to sign up for ObamaCare. —Cincinnati’s own incompetent HHS Secretary Kathleen Sebelius
- During Friday’s Larcenous Lobbyist Lunch in a private room on the second floor at McCormick & Schmick’s overlooking Fountain Square, do you think anybody will ask featured speaker Diminutive DemocRAT Cincinnati Mayor John Cranley about that paltry $9,000 per month he was paying me before I was forced to resign the account? —Chippy Gerhardt, III
Please don’t ask why it took two reporters (Sharon Coolidge and Chrissie Thompson) to not explain why Dispirited DemocRAT Hamilton County Commissioner Odd Todd Opportune decided not to run for Ohio governor on Friday night. —Feckless Fishwrappers- If you think your Hamilton County Property Taxes were humongous, why do you think I have to moonlight playing old Frank Sinatra records on WMKV-FM? —Your Disingenuous Double-Dipping DemocRAT Hamilton County Auditor (who until this year has always been permitted to run unopposed by the RINOs at 700 Walnut Street)
- Why isn’t The Blower doing more to make white people feel guilty during Black History Month? —Belligerent Black Blogger Nate “Rhymes With Hate” Livingston
- In last week’s column titled “Truth—The Best Defense,” We heard what happened when Muck Raker, political columnist for the Patronage County Innuendo, testified as an expert witness at that $10 million libel suit against the National Enquirer. —Your Friends in Patronage County
Would anybody be interested in a big announcement from Clermont County about a primary candidate before tomorrow afternoon’s filing deadline? —Clermont County Crony in Chief Tim Rudd - Was it only a coincidence that guest columns and letters to the editor from TEA Party Patriots demanding I be removed from office appeared just before tomorrow’s filing deadline? — $tate Rep-tile-for-Sale Peter $tautberg
- Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible. —The Seediest Kids of All
- We think we deserve more credit. —United Appall People
- This year we shelved our patented over-the-top sexual innuendos in our Super Bowl commercials and attempted something different. —GoDaddy.com
- Does anybody remember last year when sexy supermodel Bar Refaeli French-kissed Jesse Heiman (the luckiest computer nerd in the world) in that uncomfortable close-up shot. We understand it only required 65 takes to get it right. —Bluegrass Computer Geeks
- Does anybody remember PETA’s Banned Super Bowl Ad? —Your Good Friend Bobby Leach
- I still haven’t gotten over last year’s Super Bowl ad where that sexy Teleflora girl says “Give and you shall receive,” promising you a “Happy Valentine’s Night.” —Horny in Hebron
- In watching the NFL Red carpet coverage on Saturday and Sunday, something seemed out of whack. It seemed that every male “celebrity” over 50 brought a much younger date with him. Then it occurred to me that maybe there was a father daughter dance being held. Go Figure!!! —Super Bowl Bob
- There are still a little more than six more weeks to wait for BB&BJ Day. —Bobby Leach
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell runs dead even with Democratic challenger Alison Wondergams Grimes in Rasmussen Reports’ first look at the 2014 U.S. Senate race in Kentucky. But McConnell’s GOP primary rival Matt Bevin leads Grimes by six points. —Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen- If you think there was a lot of Super Bowl Hype last weekend, just wait till tonight’s big “Creation versus Evolution Debate” at the Lizard Museum in Boone County. —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
I’ve already won, since Ken Ham from Answers in Genesis is paying me all that money to fly in to debate him. —Bill Nye, the Science Guy- Could we say it’ll be “Ham on Nye” tonight? —Paul, the Pisgah Punster
- Do they really have Dinosaurs at the Creation Museum’s Petting Zoo? —“Trish the Dish,” Channel 19 News
- I quit WXIX-TV to embark on the most ambitious independent journalism project in history and make the Truth in Media project a reality. Now you can visit our web site where you can buy an “I Support Truth in Media” bumper sticker for only $5. No kidding! —Ben Swann
- And if all of that isn’t Newsworthy enough, check out my new video this week. —Uncle Jay Explains the News
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Evolutionists.
— Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer—
Sometimes The Blower ridicules Super Bowl Hype to show that placating the masses with bread and circuses is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t still voting on his favorite Super Bowl TV commercials.
Disclaimer: This publication is sometimes a work of fiction, but it may still contain inappropriate remarks and unsupported personal attacks, especially shameless sponsors willing to pay $4 million for a 30-second ad.
SUPER BOWL COMMERCIAL ANALYSIS HOT LINE
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WHISTLEBLOWER LINK OF THE DAY
Judge Jeanine Pirro Opening Statement: “Take the Pen”
(Sent in by James “The Rock” Bogen)
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