Sunday, January 26, 2013
The Whistleblower Week in Review
OUR NUMBER ONE GLOBAL WARMING STORY THIS WEEK was when Kneepad Liberals in the Press just couldn’t stop talking about how all of this cold weather we’re having this winter is actually being caused by Global Warming.
- OUR NUMBER TWO GLOBAL WARMING STORY THIS WEEK was when plumbers across America reported a record number of froze pipes this winter due to Global Warming.
- AND OUR NUMBER THREE GLOBAL WARMING STORY THIS WEEK was when Duke Energy told everybody to expect higher energy bills this winter because of the Global Warming.
- MONDAY in our Special “Salute to Black Republicans” E-dition, The Blower asked, “How many ways can a slain civil rights leader’s memory be exploited?”
With the hypocrisy of our Disingenuous DemocRATS’ unanimous forgiveness of equally Disingenuous DemocRAT US Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid’s racist comments about Obama’s being a “light-skinned African who won’t scare white people” and doesn’t talk in “negro dialect unless he wants to” still ringing in our ears, we can only imagine what Dingy Harry might say today on the day of Obama’s Totally Meaningless Second Historic Inauguration because both Obama and Biden were actually sworn in during separate ceremonies the day before.
Because contrary to Mendacious Media Mythology, Obama’s “historic” first election did not usher in a post-racial America. Instead, speaking openly about race is still forbidden. Just ask Harry Reid, who had dared to use the term “Negro,” although the National Council of Negro Women and United Negro College Fund still exist.
We remember years ago, on the day before the “historic” Coronation of the man WLW Hate Radio’s Racist in Residence Bill Cunningham dared to call Barack “Hussein” Obama, every racial racketeer was once again exploiting the memory of Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. and Liberals were once again posthumously ignoring the wishes of the widow of the slain civil rights leader, because she believed in honoring her husband’s legacy the way he would if he were still alive today— by WORKING.
[READ MORE HERE]
- TUESDAY in our Special “Obama’s Sixth Year Begins” E-dition, The Blower said, “We’re Counting Down Another 1,095 Days Until Obama’s Third Term” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
Today begins Obama’s sixth year in office, and Conservatives are wondering if this is the year he will finally admit some responsibility for the economy or anything else. — Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus
From the day Obama first took office, Obama continued to blame me for everything. —George W. Bush
In 2012, Obama ran for re-election by telling lies, buying votes, using the government to attack his opponents, and claiming a single four-year term just wasn’t enough time to fix things, and even more than that “47%” who would never vote for me believed him. —Mitt Romney
At least they figured out Romney was right about that 47% who would never vote for him, no matter what. Those people are still dependent upon government. They believe they’re victims. They believe the government has a responsibility to care for them. They believe they’re entitled to free health care, food, free housing, and all the other free stuff they could get their hands on, including ObamaPhones. These people pay no income tax. —Obama’s Campaign Committee
[READ MORE HERE]
- TUESDAY in our Special “Just Another Service Interruption” E-dition, The Blower said, “They Say Your Business Is All About Successful Connections!”
Your Trouble Was Not In Our Computer
Remission from last weekend’s Time Warner Business Class Temporary Service Interruption lasted an entire 24 hours before The Blower was out of business again Tuesday morning, and at 2:30 PM when we were getting ready to send out this e-dition, Time Warner Business Class Technicians in the Philippines still seemed totally unaware of problems in the Anderson Township area.
And when will The Blower’s usually reliable service be restored? As the Time Warner Business Class Technician in Guadalajara told us at 4:58 PM, “Quién Sabe?”
Reacting to all those Time Warner’s Temporary Service Interruption items on Google, Cable TV Troublemaker Tino Delgato asks, “Have you thought about switching Internet Service Providers? I keep Seeing Bill Cowher talking about how wonderful Time Warner Business Class is on TV. Go Figure!!!”
Our Mench from Mensa says, “I have dumped Time Marvin Warner. Once C&SBT got their FiOS in this neighborhood I switched to it. It has higher quality than Warner and, considering I now have my phone, cell phones, internet (about 12X faster than ZoomTown used to be) and now TV on it, it is a good deal cheaper too. If you can get FiOS where you are you might want to look into it. And, one day the TV was out for about 8-10 hours. They sent everyone a $25 gift Visa card to apologize for that.”
The Blower wonders why no attorney has yet filed a class-action lawsuit when Time Warner Business Class temporarily puts businesses out of business. Where’s our former neighbor Chris Finney when you could really use him?
[READ MORE HERE]
- WEDNESDAY in our Special “Service Temporarily Restored” E-dition, The Blower said, “Yeah, But For How Long?” And We Brought You The Rest of Wednesday’s E-dition.
It would appear that Time Warner Business Class has now temporarily restored our service, and as Paul Harvey would say, The Whistleblower Newswire is pleased to attempt to send all of those Persons of Consequence on our e-mail list the rest of our Wednesday E-dition.
[READ MORE HERE]
- THURSDAY, in our Special “Chilling Out” E-dition, The Blower said, “It’s So Cold, Even Congressional Hot Air Has Frozen!”
FROZEN PIPES ARE NO JOKE: Joe “The Plumber” says you should try to remember to drain all water from pipes if leaving for an extended amount of time. If you are heading south on I-75 to Florida, be sure to cut the main water valve off and drain all water from pipes to ensure that there is no freezing and damage while you are away.
Larry from Yorktown, Virginia says proponents of global warming are saying that all of this snow and cold weather is actually being caused by global warming. When the next ice age arrives it too will be the result of global warming. And did you know that there is a difference between climate and weather? Well I don’t know about you, but I always thought that the weather determined the climate of a region. We could always apply the Pat Robertson theory to our weather patterns, it’s a voodoo curse on Washington.
[READ MORE HERE]
- FRIDAY, in our “Just Another Guest Column E-dition, The Blower explained, “But It’s Still the Same Old BS!”
Now Let’s Meet Today’s Guest Editor:
Why, it’s none other than Frank Weikel, whose “Talk of the Town” column used to be published six-days-per week in The Enquirer (before it became The Morning Fishwrap). Frank reports: I covered two executions when I was with the paper…Both guys were convicted of shooting and killing detective Walter Hart during a robbery at a west end cafe… I responded to the cafe and Hart was still alive…But died before the ambulance came… Believe me, it is not easy seeing a good guy die…It convinced me capital punishment is a must… The electrocutions were swift, but the killer still had the pain they deserved… I hope the do gooders who now run the local Fishwrap do not go on a campaign to do away with the death penalty. We need it!
That’s why The Blower, which takes pride in supporting executing murderers, has selected the Cincinnati news media’s much respected and admired “King of Scoops” to be this week’s guest editor and choose three items plus a Quickie for today’s E-dition from our Current Cadre of Conservative Columnists and Contributors.
[READ MORE HERE]
- SATURDAY in our Special “Opposite Day” E-dition, The Blower had, “It Really Gets Confusing When You Use Sarcasm!”
Happy Opposite Day, Everybody…
…when everything you say and do are supposed to be the opposite of what you really mean. If you say “yes,” you mean “no.” If you say “turn left,” you mean “turn right.” And if you say “I love you,” you really mean “I hate you.”
We’re not really sure who created Opposite Day, but some sources vaguely connect the holiday to President Calvin Coolidge. Coolidge told the press “I do not choose to run” in the 1928 election, which left everyone wondering if he really meant the opposite.
And at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane told Political Insiders, “Every day is an ‘Opposite Day’ for politicians, because you can’t trust any of those lying bastards ever to tell you the truth,” which was probably the truth, since yesterday wasn’t “Opposite Day.”
This is the Official “Opposite Day” E-dition. Any other “Opposite Day” E-dition you might possibly see is surely a fake!
[READ MORE HERE]
This Week in Kenton Circuit Court
The latest and greatest e-dition of Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth’s Attorney E Rob Sanders industrial strength e-newsletter is on cyber news stands now!
This week’s This Week Edition features the usual bevvy of beauties, including a gun toting felon, convicted in yet another jury trial win by the Robster himself, but the most amusing part of the latest issue of the Robster’s e-rag is this guy who pled guilty to a felony… as if being named “Sunshine” wasn’t punishment enough.
More Conservative Posters
More Weekend Political Insight This Weekend
FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: Down at The Fishwrap, Metro Mole says nobody was really surprised when The Morning Fishwrap editorialized against moving the Hamilton County Board of Elections to Mt. Airy because all of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters couldn’t find polling locations in their own neighborhoods and were willing to travel downtown and stand in long lines to vote for whoever promised to give them more free stuff. What’s the problem? The DemocRAT Party will continue to bus free-stuff grabbers to the new location, and illegal voters will still get to sit up front.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1788, a fleet of 11 British ships delivered the first convicts to Australia, and Obama wonders why the Aussies aren’t begging to accept a few of our poor misunderstood GITMO inmates he still plans to turn loose.- THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Obama’s June 27, 2007 quote, when the junior Illinois Senator told a crowd in Texas, “We’re going to close Guantanamo. And we’re going to restore habeas corpus,” Obama says. “We’re going to lead by example—not just by word but by deed. That’s our vision for the future.”
OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “According to a new U.N. report, the global warming outlook is much worse than originally predicted. Which is pretty bad when they originally predicted it would destroy the planet.”
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” No. 295 says to quote P. J. O’Rourke: “The good news is that, according to the Obama administration, the rich will pay for everything. The bad news is that, according to the Obama administration, you’re rich.”
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL Remember last week when Bunky Tadwell sent us a copy of his poem entitled “Winter” that simply said, “Jesus H. Christ, it’s cold out there! (The end)?” Well today, the Bard of Cleves has another fast four-liner about our climate:
They say there is Global Warming,
But if I may be so crass;
This friggin’ Global Warming,
Is really freezing my ass!
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IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “UNDER THE INFLUENCE,” We heard the outrage over the grand-jury indictment of former Patronage County Commissioner Victor Spoils. That op-ed column first appeared in the legendary Mt. Washington Press on February 4, 1980. 
IN THIS WEEK’S SEEDIEST KID OF ALL WAS “ELDON PUDPULLER,” who was a very troubled 12-year-old lad who ran up a whopping $38,000 telephone bill last month making calls to 1-900 phone-sex lines. 
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY position on Free Stuff: “We should probably be included in that 47% who never would’ve voted for Mitt Romney.”
THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were again asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what he expected to see at Obama’s State of Disunion Address on January 28.
“Obama’s same old BS, just like you’ve seen every year during his same old State of Disunion Address,” Kane explained. “And just because Conservative Radio Talk Show Host Mark Levin urged Republicans in Congress to boycott Obama’s State of Disunion Address “to give the American people a choice between liberty and tyranny” next Tuesday, don’t expect John Boehner, Bitch McConnell, or any of those other tax-and-spend RINOS to show that kind of courage. They’re all afraid of being attacked by Obama’s Supporters in the Press. The only person I’m positively sure will be boycotting Obama’s further attempts to Divide America next Tuesday is myself.”
THIS WEEK AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday (January 27) we’ll be wondering what additional tax-and-spending Obama will be proposing in Tuesday night’s State of Dis-Union Speech to Congress, while we’re continuing our countdown of the 1,090 days remaining during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term, unless he’s impeached.- Tuesday (January 28) we’ll be we’ll be checking to see if this week’s Global Warming spell is colder than last week’s.
- Wednesday, (January 29) we’ll be analyzing the reaction to Obama’s State of Disunion Address on Tuesday, since we wouldn’t have heard it, due to The Blower’s Boycott.
- Thursday (January 30) we’ll be we’ll be reminding everybody that Friday is the last day to mail your Jacked-Up Hamilton County Real Estate Taxes.
- The first line of Friday’s (January 31) limerick is: “At our Groundhog’s Day Party this year.”
- And Saturday (January 26), we’ll probably still be partying like it’s 4711 at the Hibachi Grille to usher in the Chinese New Year, which will have occurred occurred on Friday.
The Libtard Show With Dixon Diaz
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Link of the Day
Lea Gabrielle: Not Just Another Pretty Face on Fox News
(Sent in by the Honorable Tom Dix, Not Just Another Pretty Face in Clermont County.)
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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