Daily Archives: January 22, 2014

Special “Service Temporarily Restored” E-dition

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

The Rest of Wednesday’s E-dition

           image004It would appear that Time Warner Business Class has now temporarily restored our service, and as Paul Harvey would say, The Whistleblower Newswire is pleased to attempt to send all of those Persons of Consequence on our e-mail list the rest of our Wednesday E-dition.

  • IN WASHINGTON: Our DC Newsbreaker says Disingenuous DemocRAT Congressmen are already camping out for “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s old primo aisle seat at Obama’s Annual State of Disunion Address on January 28. The Blower wonders how Conservative Radio Talk Show Host Mark Levin is doing with his attempts to encourage Republicans in Congress to boycott the event as a symbolic gesture “to give the American people a choice between liberty and tyranny.” Obama Supporters in the Press would certainly attack it. Do you think any of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters would even notice?
  • image007YESTERDAY AT A BRIBE LUNCH, a political insider was asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about the way all those Obama Supporters in the Press couldn’t stop slobbering over Obama on MLK Day, trying to compare Obama with both Martin Luther King, Jr. and Abraham Lincoln. “Yeah, right!” Kane explained. “Obama had a dream he was Lincoln.”
  • THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says an overwhelming majority of Americans continue to hold a favorable opinion of Martin Luther King, Jr., but just over one-in-three think we have reached the day of equal opportunity for all races that he envisioned, and only 20% Consider MLK Day One of the Nation’s “Most Important Holidays.” The other 80% of Americans are obviously “racist,” or so our Kneepad Liberals in the Press would have you believe.
  • SarahTHE BEST MLK DAY LINE (The Blower wishes we’d said) came from Sarah Palin, when she urged Obama and all who commit to ending any racial divide to stop playing the Race Card to honor the slain civil rights leader.
  • COUNTING DOWN: Chronic Countdowners say tomorrow we’ll be celebrating the Whistleblower’s Annual Countdown Day, commemorating the first time Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane ever employed the Countdown Device. Amazingly, some people still haven’t figured out what the first event was that Kane began counting down.
  • OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s “On Friday, Russian President Vladimir Putin said gay people at the Olympics should not fear for their safety despite the country’s anti-gay laws. He said they should fear for their safety because they’re in Russia.”
  • image008HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1973 the Supreme Court decided baby-killing was Constitutional when they legalized abortion, 55 million “legal abortions” ago.
  • OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Ronald Reagan’s “I’ve noticed that everybody that is for abortion has already been born.”

Also on Monday’s date in 1981, Iran released 52 Americans it had held hostage for 444 days, minutes after the presidency had passed from Jimmy Carter to Ronald Reagan. Back then, things were sure different than they are these days.

  • WHAT DO ALL OF THESE PEOPLE HAVE IN COMMON? That Unknown Rodeo Clown at the Missouri State Fair who showed up wearing an Obama mask during the bull riding event when the crowd went wild after he asked if they wanted to see Obama “run down by a bull”; Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters; Russian President “Bad Vlad” Putin; “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman; Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth’s Attorney E Rob Sanders; Revered Former Six-Term Ohio Congressman Bob McEwen; Long-Time Northern Kentucky Whistleblower Contributor Rick “The Bat Boy” Robinson; Endorsed Republican Township Trustee Candidate Andy Pappas; Former WLW Hate Radio Trash Talker Darryl Parks; Matt Bevin, Conservative Candidate running against U.S. Senate Surrender Monkey Bitch McConnell; Florida Republican Congressman From Cincinnati Henry “Trey” Radel; Northern Kentucky Attorney Kevin “Mad Mick” Murphy; RINO Speaker of the House John Boehner; Real Republican Congressman Steve Chabothead; Real Republican Boondoggle County Judge Executive Gary Moore; Real Republican Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup; Real Republican Former U.S. Senator from Kentucky “BeanBall Jim” Bunning; and Family Friendly Fascist Chris Finney.

ANSWER: They’ve all been chosen to be The Blower’s Guest Editors during the past several months.

And Francine the Fanatical Feminist says they all have something else in common: they’re all men. But when you read The Morning Fishwrap these days, you can hardly blame us.

image010Because the Really Sad Tale of Woe at The Fishwrap these days is all about that poor mistreated Executed Murderer Dennis McGuire who took an unusually long time to die at Lucasville last week. A whole 20 minutes? The Blower hopes they were the most excruciatingly agonizing minutes of his life. Our Compassionate Conservative says the punishment should always fit the crime. Surely in that great big prison they could’ve found somebody to rape McGuire in the ass for a whole 20 minutes and stab him to death like that murdering bastard did to a pregnant newlywed in 1989.  

  • image012MORE CAPITAL CRIMES: FREE Grain Party spokesman Haywood Jablome is complaining how members of the blamestream news media are not only failing to capitalize the first letters of the words “free grain party,” but are also not capitalizing the entire word “FREE.”
  • COUNTDOWN TO TAX DAY: Hamilton County Treasurer Robert A. Goering says you’ve been ignoring your “Jacked Up Tax Bill” for more than two weeks, but you still have until midnight on January 31 to get the money in, or our Disingenuous DemocRAT County Auditor will publish your name in The Fishwrap, along with all those other deadbeats.”
  • SPEAKING OF TAX HIKES: Thane Maynard says the Cincinnati Zoophilia Society really needed to renew your taxes again and real anti-taxers are still wondering if The Blower will be recalling the time when Ed Maruska threatened to kill all the elephants if over-taxed payers wouldn’t give him a Zoo tax increase.
  • IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says 23 years ago today everybody on the South Shore was reading about Operation Desert Storm, and people were listening to “War Talk” 24/7 on WAR AM and FM, anywhere on your radio dial (except during sports-talk programs). And, The Whistlebower was still covering the news in Northern Kentucky. 

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ROE V WADE ANNIVERSARY HOT LINE

e-mail us your fetal felicitations today.

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Some pro baby killing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally pro baby killing subscribers. 

Whistleblower Link of the Day

Time Warner Cable Business Class Technician Part 3

image016Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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