Thursday, October 24, 2013
Sebelius’ Hearing Got Cancelled Too!
OBAMACARE UPDATE: Whistleblower ObamaCare reporter Greg Glitch says despite millions being unable to enroll in ObamaCare due to Silly Sebelius’ failed $394 million website, Obama’s political group is shamefully using their screw-up to reach out to supporters for fundraising. And that’s what’s really important, isn’t it? The Blower wonders why anybody would be surprised Obama would be using the disastrous crash of his ObamaCare website to extract cash and volunteer hours from his supporters?- OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “25-year-old man in New York was arrested for trying to join al-Qaida. Here’s the amazing part: He said it was easier to join al-Qaida using their website than it was to sign up for ObamaCare.”
But how many of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Followers in All Fifty-Seven States actually got that joke?
OBAMANOMICS 101: At press time, there were 313,933,757 people in the entire country. The number of Americans now NOT in the labor force has hit another record high: 90,609,000. Thanks to Obama, they’re Not Working!- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1945, the United Nations was formally established. That turned out to be the greatest international fraud in history with its agenda to destroy the United States.
- NO WONDER OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Esther B. Fein’s “If the United Nations is a country unto itself, then the commodity it exports most is words.”
- CONGRESS WILL BE CLOSED TODAY so members can fly to Florida to attend the funeral of Congressman Bill Young, who died last week. Of course, they’ll be flown by your Defense Department, paid for with over-taxed payer dollars they’ll have to borrow. Whistleblower Congressional Correspondent Cloakroom Tadwell overheard one Delinquent DemocRAT say, “It’s too bad the dead guy wasn’t from Hawaii. We could’ve taken the whole weekend off.”
IN OHIO: Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says it didn’t take long for Critics of KasichCare to react to the way Republican Governor Kasich Taylor used his phony-baloney Controlling Board to push through KasichCare in Ohio, because bright and early Tuesday morning Maurice Thompson of the Ohio 1851 Center for Constitutional Law filed a lawsuit for a “writ of mandamus and prohibition” related to the legal legitimacy of the Ohio Controlling Board using administrative means to achieve ObamaCare Medicaid expansion in Ohio after the Republican Controlled General Assembly refused to pass the legislation Kasich wanted. This surely sounds a lot like the way Obama treats the U.S. Congress, doesn’t it? The Blower predicted Kasich’s Conniving was coming, as soon as we read The Fishwrap’s “Kudos to Kasich” for giving ObamaCare a chance in Ohio.- AMBULANCE CHASING UPDATE: Did esteemed civil rights lawyer Alphonse Gerhardstein really admit to The Fishwrap that he directly contacted these potential clients to get them to file a lawsuit after John Arthur, who challenged the same-sex marriage ban, died? Surely Alphonse would know that you aren’t allowed to solicit clients directly for cases you make money on. Whistleblower Legal Dream Team Caballeros were astonished to learn that this wasn’t ethically-challenged “Crazy Eric” Deters, Esquire. At least he can use that title in Ohio this month.
TODAY’S UNITED APPALL PERSON is Jessie Groper, who visits the Willard Skankfinder Drop-In Center for Really Ugly Teenage Tramps, another one of the 112 United Appall Agencies serving some of the Area’s more unfortunate citizens. Jessie is glad the United Appall met its fund-raising goal. Now he can continue to fondle the really ugly teenage tramps and give them his business card. “I just want to be loved,” says Jessie. “Is there anything wrong with that?”- DUMBED DOWN IN DETROIT: Disgraced Former 14-Star Affirmative Action Cincinnati Police Chief James Craig is announcing a new “Car-Jacking Awareness Program” in Detroit, especially after Car-Jack City Hoodlums almost commandeered his police car, you know, the one with the flashing lights. Local Fuzz Busters are waiting for our Current Clueless Chief from Columbus to top that. Meanwhile in Detroit, Greg Bowens, who served as press secretary to former Detroit Mayor Dennis Archer, says “Detroit’s New Police Chief Is Hardly a Profile in Courage.” [READ MORE HERE] Looks like Dough Boy Honey learned from that glowing letter from Portland, Maine recommending he hire Brother Craig and he forwarded that same letter to Detroit to get Craig the hell out of here, and not a moment too soon.
FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: Commenting on a Free Speech Week Idiotorial in The Fishwrap, Conservative Curmudgeon Stu Mahlin disagree with Caroline Little, chief executive of the National Newspaper Association, who wrote, in part: “We recognize the importance of publishing a diversity of viewpoints…. Newspapers remain the reliable way to reach the American public. Our circulation revenue is up, and our readership is growing….” Retired Cleveland Pain Dealer Newshawk Turned Bellwether Blogger Bill Sloat, who used yesterday’s Whistleblower to cancel his subscription in The Fishwrap, might also disagree.
Following up on yesterday’s coverage of Devious DemocRAT Cincinnati Mayoral Candidate Foxy Roxy Qualls’ pocketing real estate commissions on sales of property along the route of Dainty DemocRAT Mark Mallory’s Trolley Folly, Disguised DemocRAT Mayoral Candidate John Cranley wonders why Foxy Roxy never sought an advisory opinion from the Ohio Ethics Commission about whether she could ethically receive commissions for selling property along the streetcar route she voted to spend all those over-taxed payer dollars to construct. Meanwhile, after hearing about Foxy Roxy’s excessive entrepreneurism, RINO Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP said, “Maybe we should’ve endorsed her as a Republican.”
- IN COLERAIN TOWNSHIP: Old Joe Wolterman must be running again. Never mind the ass-kickin he got from a rookie last time. Some think he just enjoys going out there and stealing signs from his opponents. What is this, the 25th time he has run for office? While the Township unions and the Colerain Clique follow this D-RAT anywhere and everywhere, others are really getting tired of his “spend it until it hurts” modus operandi. He even has a “clown car candidate” running with him. Is this serious? BTW, did Old Joe ever catch up on his debts from last time?
IN COLLEGE HILL: Wednesday, ObamaCare Recruiters were out in force canvassing misleading anyone they could find who hadn’t heard about all those glitches on the ObamaCare website.- IN ANDERSON: Add sign-stealing to the list of Disgraced Anderson Township Trustee Kevin O’Brien’s criminal proclivities the Forest Hills Urinal will not be reporting for the next 12 days until this year’s elections on November 5.
But wasn’t sign stealing a big problem when Kevin’s best friend Greg Delev was running a few years ago. The Blower remembers that big investigation into the identities of the members of that Citizens Sign Removal Crew an Infamous Anderson Attorney was running during the dead of night, the last two weeks of that year’s campaign.
And did you see where Disreputable DemocRATS in Anderson got caught threatening to boycott all the stores in a retail center if they did not remove a yard sign for Endorsed Republican Trustee Candidates Josh Gerth and Andy Pappas? Bonnie Dunkleman, President of the Anderson-Newtown DemocRAT Club and Neighborhood 2012 Team Leader of Obama for America, was so mad The Blower reported their intimidation activities, Bonnie even threatened to have her D-Rats boycott all of The Blower’s advertisers.
IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Our Clermont Crusader says TEA Party Patriots should take note that their State Senator was recently seen in the state capitol standing next to well-known criminals: Stanley Aronoff with too many DUIs to mention and the only Governor in Ohio history to plead guilty to a crime while in office. Notice the smile on the two criminals’ faces along with the scared looking on Senator Uecker’s face. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea in the world to have his photo taken with those two.
IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Yesterday, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo had to go to Sears. As he approached the entrance, he noticed a driver looking for a parking space. He flagged the driver and pointed out a handicap parking space that was open and available. The driver looked puzzled, rolled down her window, and said, “I’m not handicapped!”
Well, as you can imagine, The CamBoozler’s face was really red! “Oh, I’m sorry,” he said. “I saw your ObamaCare bumper sticker and just assumed that you suffer from a mental disorder of some sort.” She then gave him the finger and screamed some nasty names at him. Boy! Some people don’t appreciate it when you’re just trying to help them out! Now just think how upset that woman’s going to be when Obama cancels her insurance coverage, just like he’ll soon be doing for thousands of other Bluegrass citizens.
Meanwhile, as we’re counting down the days until Miss Vicki’s Annual Halloween Party, many people are wondering of that event will also include The Blower’s Halloween Harangue, featuring tasteful post-mortem displays of live politicians whose careers are dead (or might as well be). Also, Miss Vicki says all her Cougar friends from Fort Mitchell will be wearing their Halloween finest.
Maybe that’s why our Horny in Hebron says “I’ll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.”
And speaking of Halloween, in a related story, some people who remember that Whistleblower Halloween Video put together by those guys at “Not the Fishwrap” a few years ago, have finally identified the Bride of Frankenstein Beloved Whistleblower Published Charles Foster Kane created as the “Mad Scientist.” Watch that video again, just to be sure.
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Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our October fund-raising drive from Andy Pappas’ Cleaner Concept in Anderson Township, with a big flashing sign out front that says, “Hey, DemocRATS— Boycott This!”
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