Sunday, September 22, 2013
The Blower’s Week in Review
- OUR NUMBER ONE “OBAMACARE SHOWDOWN” STORY THIS WEEK was when John Boehner’s House Republicans passed a bill on Friday that would continue funding the government at current spending levels for nearly three months, but would strip money appropriated to fund ObamaCare.
- OUR NUMBER TWO “OBAMACARE SHOWDOWN” STORY THIS WEEK was Harry Reid promised to strip the defund language from the continuing resolution, so the matter would be left for Obama and Boehner to come to an understanding.
- AND OUR NUMBER THREE “OBAMACARE SHOWDOWN” STORY THIS WEEK was when Obama called Boehner to tell him he wouldn’t negotiate.
- MONDAY in our Special “Negative Advertising” E-dition, The Blower said, “How can you criticize without being critical?”
Remember when the Morning Fishwrap published a letter from a reader who claimed he was constantly amazed at how many individuals disagreed with a politician by criticizing him or her with the harshest words they could imagine? Our Ridiculous Reader said referring to someone as “stupid,” “inept,” “dishonest,” or with other derogatory adjectives will not change the viewpoint of a strong supporter of that person. Facts (real facts), our Ridiculous Reader says, would sway the other side, but not name calling.
Was that guy nuts?
That’s just the kind of touchy-feely Rodney King “Can’t We All Get Along?” claptrap you’d expect the eunuchs on Skaggie Maggie’s idiotorial board to publish. It’s no wonder The Fishwrap and our local Society of Unprofessional Journalists still can’t understand why so many of their Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Readers and Viewers don’t understand the world around them.
[READ MORE HERE]
- TUESDAY in our Special “Obama’s Syrian SNAFU” E-dition, The Blower said “Just Think, In Only 1,221 More Days All this Fun Will Be Over!” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
“SNAFU” is a military slang acronym meaning “Situation Normal: All Fucked Up.” —Whistleblower’s Garrulous Grammarian Gerund Tadwell
When most people say they support the President’s Plan in Syria, unfortunately they’re talking about President Putin. — Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus
Just because I backed down on Syria doesn’t mean we couldn’t strike Iran. —Barrack Obama, Warrior President and Community Organizer
Please thank President Putin for turning my gaffe on Syria into a home run for the Kremlin. —Obama’s Clueless Secretary of State John Kerry, Continuing to Lurch Leftward
John Kerry has been one of the best Secretaries of State in the History of the United States of America. —Obama’s Doofus Vice President Joe Biden
[READ MORE HERE]
- WEDNESDAY in our Special “DC Navy Yard Massacre” E-dition, The Blower said, “The Gunman Took Joe Biden’s Advice—He Bought a Shotgun!”
Monday, when Aaron Alexis, a Black Buddhist 9/11 Rescuer U.S. Navy Veteran with a “Secret Clearance” went off his meds, picked up a gun, and killed 12 other people at the Naval Yard in DC, everybody could hardly wait to use the tragedy to promote his own agenda, as another horrible event was swiftly politicized, and predictably seized by gun-control extremists as a political opportunity. The suspect’s family said had he had “Anger Management” issues. Do you think?
Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard used the D.C. Naval Yard shooting to push For “Gun Control,” along with the usual suspects, including the editor of the Leftist Rag The Nation, CNN’s Faux “Conservative” David Frum, PMSNBC’s Chris Matthews, and Over-the-Hill Hollywood Celebrity Henry “the Fonz” Winkler. Liberals complain no AR-15 was used, but the best part was when that CNN Anchor couldn’t remember the last time there was a shooting at a U.S. Military Facility.
Perhaps Obama’s Supporters in the Press should’ve done a better job covering the trial of Murdering Muslim Ft. Hood Jihadist Nidal Hasan. He just got sentenced to death for his little “workplace violence incident” at Ft. Hood, Texas.
[READ MORE HERE]
- THURSDAY, in our Special “Just Another Massacre” E-dition, The Blower said, “Jihadists Were Praying the D.C. Naval Yard Shooter Was Muslim, and Everybody Else Is Reacting Right On Cue!
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus was watching everybody’s rather predictable reaction to Monday’s mass shooting during America’s Dark Ages of the Obama Administration. This time it was a Black Buddhist 9/11 Rescuer Obama-Supporting U.S. Navy Veteran with a “Secret Clearance” and “Anger Management” issues who went off his meds, picked up a gun, and killed 12 other people in one of Bill Clinton’s “Gun Free” Zones at the Naval Yard in DC.
The most predictable reaction was, of course, Obama’s. He made just another teleprompter speech bemoaning “yet just another shooting spree,” then went on to deliver his customary sharp partisan attack on Republicans who dared not to agree to give him everything he wanted on gun control, the economy, and everything else on his delusional wish list. That way all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters would be able to tell pollsters that Obama was still doing a good job during Obama’s latest crisis.
[READ MORE HERE]
- FRIDAY in our in our Special “Obama’s OJT Program” E-dition, The Blower said, “In Five Years, He Hasn’t Learned Much!”
In 2008, the Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane warned what would happen if Americans voted to elevate one of the least experienced presidential candidates in history to the Oval Office. Now consider Obama’s Silly Syrian Strategy. It was a batch of mixed messages to the American people and a Congressional sales pitch that convinced more people to vote against his proposal than in favor. Obama’s had five years of on-the-job-training, and America still has a president whose foreign policy can only be described as one debacle after another.
Someone else who foretold what kind of president Obama would be was Richard Pryor. Thirty-two years ago that black comedian showed us what the first black president would be like. 32 years ago? That’s like a Nostradamus prediction.
[READ MORE HERE]
- SATURDAY in our Special “Summer’s Over” E-dition, The Blower said, “Is Obama ready for his fall?”
Whistleblower Weather-guesser Delkus Apuozzo says as of 4:44 PM EDT this afternoon, the 2013 Summer of our Discontent will be officially concluded and hopefully, the Fall of the Obama Administration will have formally begun. Despite talk of impeachment, there are still 1,217 more days left of the Dark Ages of the Obama Administration, not that all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters would ever know the difference.
[READ MORE HERE]
IT’S COLLECTION TIME
And this weekend your Neighborhood News Boy or Girl will be stopping by to collect $3.50 for delivery of this month’s Blower.
The children retain half of this amount plus any tips you give them to reward good service. For information about our carrier program, please call Mr. Scamwell at our circulation department.
MORE OBAMANATIONS
- JERKS OF THE WEEK: House DemocRATS who walked out of the Benghazi hearings.
- WHAT’S WRONG WITH OBAMA?: Obama defends giving hyper-partisan attack speech while naval yard shooting rampage was still going on…White House hits Republicans for not wanting to “Compromise” on Spending Bill, then vows not to compromise…Obama says “raising the debt ceiling does not increase our debt, and Politico is perplexed, asking why has Obama has “failed to turn public opinion around on a single difficult issue”
- OBAMA’S FOREIGN POLICY FAILURES: Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard says results from Obama’s Syria fiasco matter more than “style points”…Assad sends inadequate chemical weapons report, US-Russia plan “indefinitely postponed”…and State department says Obama’s agreement with Russia on Syria “pretty much gives Assad job security.”
- LURCHING TO THE LEFT: Obama’s Clueless Secretary of State John Kerry says, “I want to thank President Putin for turning my gaffe on Syria into a home run for the Kremlin.
- OBAMA SCANDAL UPDATE: IRS Employees were “acutely” aware Obama wanted them to crack down on Conservative groups…new documents show IRS flagged groups because of their “anti-Obama rhetoric”… Holder and IRS officials spoke at political training session for black ministers where Dem congressman railed against “right-wing conspiracy”… and Obama’s IRS spied onTEA party groups even after granting them tax-exempt status.
- OBAMANOMICS 101: Household Incomes flat despite sunnier economy… 23,116,928 American Households on Food Stamps, more than the number of households In ME, NH, VT, MA, RI, NJ, NY, PA combined…and House GOP Bill would allow drug testing Food Stamp Recipients and add Work Requirement.
- OUR DEVOLVING CULTURE DURING THE AGE OF OBAMA: WABC in Washington reports Monday’s Massacre at the DC Navy Yard was only the 20th Mass Shooting since Obama took office in 2009. University of Kansas indefinitely suspends professor who hoped for the murder of NRA Members’ Children. Also resigning was, Allan Brauer, communications chairman for the DemocRAT Party of Sacramento who used his Twitter account Friday to wish that the children of Senator Ted Cruz’s aide Amanda Carpenter would “die from debilitating, painful and incurable diseases.”
- THE LATEST POLLS: Whislteblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says the brand new monthly Zogby Analytics Poll taken September 17-18 among 1000 likely voters, shows Obama’s job approval rating has taken a dive down to 43%, with 54% disapproving of his overall performance.
- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKE WATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “It looks like the federal government could be shutting down. The legal definition of a government shutdown is when Congress continues not to work, but they do it from home.”
MISTEROBAMA’S AMERICA
- HEADLINES ACROSS AMERICA: Government shutdown looms over ObamaCare. Same Company vetted both Snowden and Alexis. Obama hunkers down and begins working on plan to avert Government Shutdown…actually he was back on the golf course for round number 145 since he’s been in office. And Libs want to designate Ugly People as a “Protected Class” by creating Affirmative Action Programs for the Hideous.
- POLITICS AS USUAL: Obama Whines: Republicans Are Trying To “Extort” Me!” and House Dems use it as a Fundraising Ploy: “Let’s Show Him We’ve Got His Back”… House Dems are raffling off a chance to eat brunch with the Mooch…Obama calls Boehner to tell him he won’t negotiate with him on Debt Limit.
- RACIAL HEALING UPDATES: D.C. Naval Yard Shooter felt he was the victim of Racism, “Screwed Over” because he was Black
- GAY NEWS UPDATE: L.A. Dodgers Gets Their Fabulous On: Team to host first “LGBT Night OUT” Event… We’re guessing Obama has volunteered to throw out the first pitch.
- DELUSIONAL DEMOCRATS: Jay Cardboard says: “John Boehner has´Putin envy”…Eleanor Holmes Norton compares D.C. Navy Shooting to 9/11…Nancy Pelosi says, ”Republicans are “Taking Food Out Of The Mouths Of Babies”… and Top House Dem Steny Hoyer compares Republicans to a Kidnapper who “Kills” Their “Hostage.”
- SENILE IN THE SENATE: DemocRAT Dick Durbin says, “The Senate Gun Control Bill voted down In April would have stopped the Naval Yard Massacre… Dem Chris Murphy says, “Congress is morally justified in forcing Americans to violate their Religious Beliefs… and McRINO: says trying to Defund Obamacare will “Harm American People’s View of The Republican Party.”
- TEA PARTY TERRORISTS: The Hill reports Next week could be a defining moment for Texas Senator Ted Cruz. The presidential contender’s quest to defund ObamaCare has made him more popular with the base than ever, but that acclaim could fade if he is perceived as retreating from battle — or if the strategy he’s advocated backfires on the GOP.
- WELFARE ABUSE: Michigan bills seek to make Welfare Recipients Work for their Pass Drug Tests and work for their Benefits. No kidding!
THE LIBERAL AGENDA
- OBAMACARE UPDATES: Walgreens dumps Company Sponsored Health Care Benefits for its employees…Home Depot sending 20,000 Part-Timers to Health Exchanges.., Only 12% say ObamaCare will have positive impact on their family…ObamaCare will force doctors to ask you about your sex life…and new ads show people what ObamaCare would really be like.
- OBAMA’S ORGANIZING FOR ACTION: Naval Yard Massacre used as Fundraising Ploy, and they’re busy attacking Republicans seeking to defund ObamaCare. They even want you to sign your name to a petition to tell John Boehner “Enough is Enough<” and send them another $5 donation at the same time.
- MURDERING MUSLIM UPDATE: Jihadists prayed D.C. Naval Yard Shooter was Muslim…Saudi Cleric says Muslim Men may enjoy the company of up to 19,604 “Black Eyed Virgins” in Paradise… DOJ Inspector General Report finds FBI violated Congressional Ban on working With CAIR…and CAIR Report denounces wide range of Conservative Critics as “Islamophobes.”
- LIBERAL BRAINWASHING: High School History Textbook changes The Constitution to take away Individuals Right To Bear Arms…and Students at USC say Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize was totally deserved, but can’t explain why.
- AMNESTY FOR FUTURE DEMOCRATS: Obama says, “Amnesty is my “Number-One Priority”…Los Angeles Officials say Illegal Immigrants on pace to receive $650 Million in Welfare Benefits in 2013… and illegal Immigrant “Dreamer” praised by Dick Durbin says, “Fuck Israel! Fuck Zionists!”
- BABY KILLING UPDATE: Pro-Abortion Obama Nominee for Federal Judge says Abortion Frees Women from “Conscription Into Maternity.” Number of Abortion Clinics that have closed in 2013 jumps to 44.
- GLOBAL WARMING: Leaked Documents show UN Climate Change Group was urged to cover up fact Earth’s temperature hasn’t increased for last 15 years…Harry Reid blames Colorado floods on Global Warming.
- G-UNCONTROL: Obama blames “Faction of the Republican Party” for his inability to pass Gun Control…Obama Exploits Naval Yard Tragedy by calling for more Gun Control. White House says Obama to exploit Navy Yard Shooting with New Round of Executive Actions On Gun Control..and Poll says D.C. Naval Yard shooting leads to decrease in support for Gun Control.
- UNION BLUES: Labor unions were among the strongest supporters for ObamaCare when it passed in 2010. They spent millions of dollars in ad buys supporting the bill, pressured wavering DemocRATS in Congress to pass it, and followed up with support for those DemocRATS in the November elections. Three years later, union leaders say the bill they fought to pass now threatens to hurt their own members. Suckers!
Closer to Home
- BOEHNER BASHER: Liberty Township Conservative Eric Gurr is now running for GOP House Speaker John Boehner’s seat in Congress in next year’s Primary. [SEE HIS WEB PAGE HERE] Watch his video and see if you think he’ll get the TEA Party’s endorsement.
- TEA PARTY TARGETS: Ohio TEA Party Guy Tom Zawistowski says this week USA Today published a story that indicated newly uncovered IRS documents showed the IRS flagged at least 10 Ohio groups for “anti-Obama rhetoric,” include the Ohio Liberty Coalition, Sidney Shelby County Liberty Group, Southeastern Ohio 912 Project, Liberty Township TEA Party, Cincinnati 912 Project, Faith and Freedom Coalition of Ohio, Dayton TEA Party, Ohioans for Healthcare Freedom, Portage County TEA Party, and Ohio First for a Better Government.
- OHIO VOTER FRAUD: PMSNBC’s Ed Schultz claims Ohio Secretary of State Jon Husted is “Intimidating” Blacks by saying “It’s Illegal to commit Voter Fraud.”
- CONSERVATIVE IN CLERMONT: Besides introducing legislation to block unsolicited absentee ballot applications Republican State Rep-tile John Becker Is also so upset about a federal court decision that recognized same-sex marriage, he wants Ohio Second District Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup to start impeachment proceedings against U.S. District Court Judge Timothy S. Black, the jurist who wrote it. “Bronze Star Brad” cut and ran by saying he’d rely on the appellate process to decide the constitutionality.
- THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): During all that background checking sall those people were supposedly doing before Cincinnati City Mangler Dough Boy Honey selected Jeffrey Blackwell to replace Disgraced Former Fourteen-Star Police Chief James Craig, did anybody bother to read that TV10 in Columbus story that said “Deputy Police Chief Being Investigated Again?”
- ALSO IN CINCINNATI: DemocRAT Clown-cilman P.G. Sittenfeld and Ohio State Rep-tile Denise Driehaus want Republican Governor Kasich-Taylor to reconsider tax breaks for Dildo World. We’re not sure about P.G., but our Slut for Obama says Patty Brisben’s products are the best she’s ever used.
- OKTOBERFESTING: Whistleblower Alternative Lifestyle Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis think it’s really fabulous that Fourth Tier Celebrity Gay Star Wars Character George Takei was available to be Grand Marshall of Oktoberfest Zinzinnati 2013, and make this year’s event the gayest Oktoberfest yet. Richard Simmons was not wasn’t available. Senator Rob “My Son is Gay” Portman could’ve performed a gay marriage while Deceased Gay Stargazer Jack Horkheimer Wannabe Dean Regas from the Cincinnati Observatory and Mr. Sulu were otherwise occupied doing their “Choke My Chicken” Dance. Oh, myyy!
- CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET says Courthouse wags are wondering where did all that money in former sheriff Si Leis’ campaign war chest go? If only they would ask, The Blower would surely tell them.
- IN ANDERSON: Wednesday night, the Women League of Vipers held their long-awaited meaningless forum in Anderson Township and went out of their way to make sure their questions attacked the Township’s Conservative Base. And Duffy “The Kevin Slayer” Beischel says Real Republicans were surprised to see Lisa Wakeland speaking at Wednesday’s League of Women Vipers forum, especially when the Forest Hills Urinal Reporter identified herself as a member of that Radical Left Wing group. So much for Lisa’s so-called fair-and-balanced reporting! Candy Crowley would be so proud.
Also, when Robert McClure was arrested for exposing himself at the Hamilton County Court House Friday morning, he asked if was too late to get on the ballot for Anderson Township Trustee as Disgraced Masturbating Trustee Kevin “Big Spanky” O’Brien’s running mate.
- FROM THE GREAT WHITE NORTH: NoTaxJack says if voters knew about the millions the Enterprise pipeline in rural Warren County is going to pay schools in Lebanon, Waynesville, and Springboro every year (see the video), no one would ever vote for a levy ever again. This is the second pipe line and there is going to be a third pipe line in the future. Until the Springboro schools let voters know about all this EXTRA CASH, we didn’t have a clue. The Blower wonders how Lebanon Schools kept quiet about the extra free cash they got from the last pipe line. Do you think they’ll tell the voters BEFORE November election?
On the South Shore
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says the latest and greatest e-dition of Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth’s Attorney E Rob Sanders family friendly e-newsletter is on cyber news stands now! This week’s This Week In Kenton Circuit Court features all varieties of weirdos, hoodlums, low-lifes, and druggies like Tommy Shay here who was convicted of heroin possession. But fear not, Tommy didn’t actually play Doc Brown in “Back to the Future,” that was Christopher Lloyd, who has not yet been convicted of a felony in Kenton County.
- NO SHOW IN FORT MITCHELL: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo hopes Dead Dog DemocRAT Nathan “Cornbread” Smith this weekend’s fundraiser for Alison Wondergams Grimes at the “Cornbread Estates” in Fort Mitchell doesn’t wind up to be as embarrassing as Nathan’s ill-fated fundraiser for Hillary in 2008, when everybody asked for refunds after Hillary lost. This time Nathan’s celebrity Pop star will.i.am was a no-show. “Not to worry,” says Nathan. “Guys were still coming to see those Wondergams they keep reading about in The Blower.
- A GOOD SHOW ON MAINSTRASSE: Yesterday’s Limerick Contest Winner Floyd Schnitzelflogger from Florence, KY, likes Oktoberfest on Mainstrasse in Covington better, because at the one in Downtown Cincinnati this weekend, not as many girls will show you their big beautiful American breasts.
- EVEN A BETTER SHOW HERE: That Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Out to Destroy “Crazy Eric Deters” including Lovely Lisa Wells (The Attorney Who Replaced “Crazy Eric” on WLW Hate Radio) wonders if you saw The Fishwrap’s photo gallery of “Ben-Gals Through the Years.” Wouldn’t it be funny if several pictures of “Crazy Eric’s” favorite client, disgraced former Ben-Gal Sarah Jones, were also included?”
More Political Insight This Week
- FECKLESS AT THE FISHWRAP: When The Fishwrap notified readers home delivery of the print edition “could be delayed” on Saturday and readers were invited to read the e-newspaper on line, Cynical Sid suggested ot was just a gimmick to generate more hits on the web pages to justify their advertising rates. “It’s the kind of sneaky maneuver they’d be capable of, but i think you give them too much credit,” reported Metro Mole. “With damn few editors left, a design desk in Louisville, and a printing plant in Columbus, even with absurdly early deadlines it’s a miracle they ever deliver on time. Wait till the first blizzard.”
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1862, Republican President Abraham Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation to free Black slaves in the States in Rebellion. The Blower wonders how our Kneepad Liberals in the Press will recall the occasion. nders how our Kneepad Liberals in the Press will recall the occasion.
- MAYBE THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Queen Latifah’s “I miss the ’70s where you had shows like ‘The Jefferson’s’ and ‘All In The Family’ where Black people could be Black and white people could be white. Racists could be racists, and non-racists could be non-racists, but it was talked about.
- GOING GALT: While there was an increase in the number of Americans going Galt after Obama took office, the recent increase seems to be the result of the FATCA legislation. Shunned by Swiss and German banks and facing tougher asset-disclosure rules under the Foreign Account Tax Compliance Act, more of the estimated six million Americans living overseas are weighing the cost of holding a U.S. passport.
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #268 is to ask a liberal, “If God really cares about cruelty to animals, how come he made foie gras taste so delicious?”
- NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES:
Autumn Amour
Fall is here
Girls cover up
Now there’s more to take off
Before boys can start to shtup!
- AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why The Blower seemed to be taking it easy on GOP House Speaker John Boehner this weekend. “Boehner actually allowed the House to vote to defund ObamaCare,” Kane explained. “Maybe it’s because our Special Ed teacher who knows a lot about behavior modification told us we should give Boehner a pat on the back. We can always kick him in the ass later.”
- FINALLY, COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday with those November 5 Elections only a little more than six weeks away, we’ll be focusing on What Ordinary Americans Think About America’s Future, and we’ll still be counting down the 1,215 days remaining until Obama’s “historic” Third Term begins.
Tuesday everybody will be celebrating “National Cherries Jubilee Day” and in “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers,” some of the ladies will tell us how they lost their cherries.
Wednesday is “National Comic Book Day,” and Whistleblower Alternate Life-Styles Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis will be checking out why Comic Books are once more at the front of the culture war with the controversy over Bat Woman’s gay wedding.
Thursday is “Johnny Appleseed Day,” because John Chapman (aka Johnny Appleseed) was actually born on September 26, 1774.
The first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “When the Reds don’t clinch the pennant this year”
Saturday is “Ask a Stupid Question Day” so all to reporters need to get ready for that.
The Libtard Show by Dixon Diaz
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Whistleblower Link of the Day
Flying Over America
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.