Friday, July 19, 2013
Hurley’s Hurrahs
This morning, Hurley the Historian told us to move over because tomorrow’s e-dition belongs to him. After all, won’t it be 44 years ago (July 20, 1969) since we were all watching Neil Armstrong walking on the moon? From 1971 to 1979 Neil Armstrong was professor of Aerospace engineering at the University of Cincinnati. And no doubt, today everybody will be echoing our Quote for Today Committee choice of Armstrong’s immortal: “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.
But according to Jennifer Rosenberg at About.com:
It seemed as though Armstrong had missed a word. Before the word “man,” there was supposed to be the letter “a.” The line was supposed to read, “That’s one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.”
In 2006, an analysis was made of the tapes of the now famous phrase and it was determined that there was a bit of static just at the point where the “a” might have been. So, although it is entirely non-conclusive, Armstrong might have actually said the line correctly.
One wonders, however, if it really matters. The statement was obviously powerful enough that even most school kids know where it was said. Isn’t that more than can be said for nearly every other historical achievement?
- Then there’s this bit of fanciful urban legend about the moonwalk, where Neil Armstrong not only gave his famous “one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind” statement, but followed it by several remarks, usual communications between Armstrong, the other astronauts, and Mission Control. Just before he re-entered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark “Good luck, Mr. Gorsky.”
Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years many people questioned Armstrong as to what the “Good luck, Mr. Gorsky” statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.
On July 5, 1995 (in Tampa Bay, Florida) while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26-year old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.
When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. His friend hit a fly ball which landed in the front of his neighbor’s bedroom windows. His neighbors were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky.
As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, “Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You’ll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!”
All of this real history may be overshadowed today, if our Kneepad Liberals in the Press weren’t still eulogizing over the death of Walter Cronkite three years ago (July 17, 2009). The life of this Liberal Icon seems to have been almost as important to humanity as Michael Jackson’s. As Liberal Mourner-in-Chief, Obama got his eulogy video out there first.
Former Pants-Dropper-in Chief Bill Clinton got his CBS interview shortly afterwards.
It was the least they could do for Cronkite, the well-known Good DemocRAT Clinton-Obama Supporter.
But according to Joseph Farah at World Net Daily, Uncle Walter, “the most trusted man” in the country during his reign as CBS News anchor, was actually pushing a radical agenda. Imagine that!
- But that was back when real history was being made— not all that “historic” claptrap Obama Supporters in the Press have been feeding you for the past five years.
This week we can hardly wait to see all those TV newsbimbos (who weren’t even born at the time) claiming they watched Neil Armstrong’s moonwalk or Walter Cronkite’s Vietnam War reports. - Unfortunately, today’s network anchors are nothing more than political partisans. Why then is their credibility lower than that of Congress, bankers, used car salesmen, and Masturbating Township Trustees?
- Two years ago, you witnessed another historic event during the Obama Administration— when our spaced-out president cancelled the space program and astronauts had to drink their own recycled urine on the final trip.
Instead of boldly going where no man has gone before, Obama’s astronauts were forced to report to the unemployment line and Obama’s giant step for America became trying to catch a ride Russian space ship.
- They sure don’t make our leaders like the used to. Maybe that’s why back on Earth, Award-Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception compared Neil Armstrong’s One Giant Leap for Mankind with local RINO Party Chairman Alex T., Mall Cop GOP’s “Wandering in the Wilderness.”
- And as Walter Cronkite would’ve said tomorrow, “And that’s the way it is, Saturday, July 20, 2012.”
Stories We’re Working On
Thousands expected at Saturday’s Trayvon Rally in Cincinnati- 17 Trayvon Protesters arrested in LA
- Trayvon Protesters beat grandmother taking sick child to hospital
- MLK wouldn’t wear a Hoodie
- Black Conservatives called “House Niggers”
- Sending fake Zimmerman racist tips to the FBI
- Reds still in third place, five games out
Whistleblower Web Poll
This week, here’s why the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said they still don’t support Obama’s Trillion Dollar Obamacare Nightmare:
(A) It’s going to cost a freaking fortune: 2%
(B) Don’t want to pay medical care for 40 million illegal immigrants: 1%
(C) Their own doctors said they’d refuse to treat them: 1%
(D) If it’s not good enough for the Obamas or Members of Congress, the rest of us don’t want it either: 96%
Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!
Some of Today’s Conservative Political Cartoons
O’Brien’s Ouster
This week, everybody who is never one bit surprised at the Forest Hills Urinal’s failure to report important political events in Anderson Township (like the Anderson Township Republican Central Committee’s double-secret meeting to select Conservative Cleaner Concepts guy Andy Pappas after Pouting Peggy Reis decided NOT to run for another term as Anderson Township Trustee), e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is long-time Anderson resident Clough Nagle, who says it’s really ironic Disgraced Trustee Kevin “Big Spanky” O’Brien’s severest critic wound up running to replace Whacky Jacky O’Brien’s Illegitimate Son in just 109 more days.
Clough wins free admission to the Anderson Center’s Party on the Plaza next week that’ll combine local restaurants and local businesses with live music and a fun atmosphere; a guest shot at next weekend’s Anderson’s Got Talent where he can win that $1,000 grand prize, and pecker tracks removed from up to three pairs of his trousers at Cleaner Concepts. His winning entry is:
The new candidate for Anderson Trustee
Promises fiscal responsibility
To save over-taxed payers’ money
And turn every cloudy day sunny
Andy’s Conservative, we guarantee!
And from the Anderson Laureate (Who wonders if Andy’s Campaign T-Shirts will have to be dry cleaned.)
The new candidate for Anderson Trustee,
Was selected from among the top three.
Unlike Kevin P. O’Brien,
He promised not to be lyin’
And not to masturbate on any woman’s knee.
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“Liberal outrage is so phony and fake”
HISTORIC HEADLINES HOT LINE
e-mail your revisionist rhetoric today.
Some lunar landing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally out of this world subscribers, but we could always use more.
Whistleblower Link of the Day
Neil Armstrong’s One Small Step
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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