Sunday, July 7, 2013
The Blower’s Week in Review
OUR NUMBER ONE STORY THIS WEEK was when Anti-Americanism Flares In Egypt As Both Anti-Morsi and Pro-Morsi Sides blamed the Obama Administration and Obama’s State Department was caught lying again, this time about the whereabouts of Obama’s Secretary of State John Kerry, who was on his yacht off of the coast of Nantucket as the Egyptian military took over the country from Obama-Administration-backed Muslim Brotherhood President Mohammed Morsi.- OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEK was when Obama’s White House delayed Obamacare’s Employer Mandate until after the 2014 Midterm Elections, and even the Obama Supporters in the Press figured out it that decision just might have been “political.”
- AND OUR NUMBER STORY THIS WEEK was when the Anderson Township Republican Central Committee (elected Precinct Executives) announced it will be holding a meeting July 16 to interview potential candidates, now that Pouting Peggy Reis has decided to NOT run for another term as Anderson Township Trustee. The number of people e-mailing “In Russ We Trust” Jackson at [email protected] to sign up for a 15-minute interview should be astronomical.
- MONDAY in our Special “Anti-Social Networking” E-dition, The Blower asked, “Shouldn’t Politicians Use “Two-Faced Books?”
At yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about all that Social Networking Nonsense you can’t get away from.
Some people claim Social Networking has encouraged new ways to communicate and share information, and Social Networking websites are being used regularly by gazillions of dumbed-down, self-absorbed, media-influenced, celebrity-obsessed, politically-correct uninformed short-attention-span people. We even have a Video called “Social Networking in Plain English.”
According to Wikipedia (the free encyclopedia), these days some of the most popular Social Networks include Facebook, Google+, YouTube, and Twitter. You might even see their logos on some of the e-mails you receive or web sites you visit. Those logos mean you can waste even more of your time joining their Social Networks.
[READ MORE HERE]
- TUESDAY in our Special “Not So Patriotic” E-dition, The Blower said Obama’s Scandals Depressing Independence Day Celebrations and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
Here’s what’s in the Obama Administration’s Scandal Defense Playbook on this Fourth of July. First “Deny,” then “Lie,” then “Commit Perjury,” and if all that fails, you Obama’s Paid Liars can always “Plead the Fifth Amendment.” —Judge Jeanine
This Independence Day, TEA Party Patriots should sign the American Legacy PAC’s petition to “Audit the IRS.” —Newt Gingrich
Monday’s front-page puff piece defending Obama Supporters at the Cincinnati IRS Office who broke all those laws targeting Conservatives to help get Obama re-elected in 2012 should keep The Fishwrap from being audited for as long as they can stay in business. —Whistleblower Rogue IRS Snitch Ferrell Katz
Will it be any surprise this year on July Fourth, that after last week’s rulings on same sex marriage our public approval of the Supreme Court has fallen to the lowest level ever recorded in more than nine years of polling. —Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen
[READ MORE HERE]
- WEDNESDAY in our Special “Same Time Last Year” E-dition, The Blower said, “Those Were the Good Old Days!”
Think of how much things have changed since last year during the first week in July when Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders said the heat wave had come to Ohio when we saw dueling bus tours in the northern part of the state. Mitt Romney’s presidential campaign featured Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal and former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty aboard the Romney bus in Maumee, Parma, and the Mahoning Valley, one step ahead of Obama, whose own “Betting on America” bus tour was scheduled to hit those same three areas.
Whistleblower Summer Interns Rachel, Bradley, Ashley, and Hunter found this Republican National Committee meant ad meant to be a really warm greeting for Obama. Everybody was sure watching the Romney campaign was going to be a lot of fun, like when the Marine Corps Band played Romney’s Campaign Song on the White House Lawn while Obama greeted guests.
[READ MORE HERE]
- THURSDAY, in our Annual “Independence Day” E-dition, The Blower said, “Politics may be the last refuge of a scoundrel, but it’s the first for a politician!”
Our Founding Fathers have been spinning in their graves watching what’s going on in Washington ever since Obama was elected.
And if they were alive today on the 237th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence’s adoption by the Continental Congress and saw how this nation has become a feckless flock of dumbed-down, self-absorbed, media-influenced, politically-correct, celebrity-obsessed, uninformed government-dependent sheep, we wonder if they’d ever do it all again.
With that in mind, we’re pleased once again to bring you this commentary on their sacrifice:
[READ MORE HERE]
- FRIDAY in our Official “Post-Holiday Stress Disorder” E-dition, The Blower said, “Hopefully, America’s best days are still yet to come!”
Now that the official Fourth of July holiday is finally over, The Blower can return to its customary eight-days-per-week schedule. Yesterday, when political insiders were sitting around the pool celebrating Independence Day at Charles Foster Kane’s estate so they could, most members of the Conservative Agenda were asking if the other 364 days this year are still being called “Government Dependence Days” for all those Dumb Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Free-Stuff Grabbing Low-Information Obama Supporters, 
since Dependence on the Government is at an all time high during another summer of our discontent, especially after Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen said even, 70% say Americans are worse off today than before Obama took Office, and 41% didn’t even know the Supreme Court had just ruled on our same sex marriage.
Yesterday, Drew McKissick said we were celebrating less Independence because the land of liberty ain’t what it used to be. On the one hand, we have faceless bureaucRATS becoming more ingrained in our everyday lives, and on the other hand we have judges overturning the will of the voters, whether expressed in referendums or via elected representatives. That’s hardly a cause for a celebration of independence.
[READ MORE HERE]
- SATURDAY in our Official Official “National Fried Chicken Day” E-dition, The Blower Hoped It Wasn’t Just Another Damn KFC Promotion!
Today is National Fried Chicken Day, a day to enjoy crisp and tasty, finger licking good fried chicken. And we don’t care if it does make us sound slightly racist, our Freebie Gourmet says, “Popeye’s do make some fine chicken. And wouldn’t you know, our Good Friend Bobby Leach says he prefers a big breast.
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says former President George W. Bush was born on this date 67 years ago in 1946, and today the RNC (RINO National Committee) says the best way for the nation to show how much they really miss Bush 43 would be for every person in America to send them $67.
THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Dubya’s “If America shows weakness and uncertainty, the world will drift toward tragedy. That will not happen on my watch.”
[READ MORE HERE]
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
OBAMANOMICS 101: America is suffering the longest period of 7.5%+ Unemployment on record, and only 47% of Adults have full-time jobs and the U6 unemployment/underemployment rate hit a six month high, 14.3%.- SEQUESTER JESTERS: Obama’s 2013 Air Force One Bill just hit $24 Million, $6.5 Million for last week’s Africa vacation alone.
- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKE WATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree…and think 25 to life would be appropriate,” Conan O’Brien’s “Have you heard about McDonald’s’ new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it,” David Letterman’s “Q: What’s the difference between Obama’s cabinet and a penitentiary? A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners,” Jimmy Kimmel’s “What’s the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo? A: Bo has papers,” and The Blower’s Unknown Comic’s “Here a solution to the problem in Egypt: They want a new Muslim leader, so we should give them ours.”
- OBAMA SCANDAL UPDATE: If Obama’s Paid IRS Lois Lerner never did anything wrong, why has she refused to testify before the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee unless she’s given immunity?
- ROGUES FOR OBAMA: Whistleblower Rogue IRS Snitch Ferrell Katz says Monday’s front-page puff piece defending Obama Supporters at the Cincinnati IRS Office who broke all those laws targeting Conservatives to help get Obama re-elected in 2012 should keep The Fishwrap from being audited for as long as they can stay in business.
- SCOTUS SCARES: The difference between the Supreme Court and the Ku Klux Klan is that the members of the Supreme Court wear black robes and scare white people.
Washington Weak in Review
- PASSIONLESS PATRIOTISM: Obama stumbled through a “patriotic” speech on the Fourth of July, reading verbatim a text on America’s improbable experiment in “democracy” in a staccato and droll tone.
- LIARS FOR OBAMA: Director of National Intelligence James Clapper has apologized for lying to Congress over the National Security Agency’s surveillance activity and of course there will be no repercussions.
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says the first U.S. troops were withdrawn from South Vietnam on this date in 1969, and in Washington Obama and Jane Fonda will be holding a press conference on the Capitol steps to blame George W. Bush.
- DOOFUS DEMOCRATS: Celebrating Independence Day, Hollywood Celebrity MoonBat Bette Midler said, “If only we’d lost the Revolutionary War, we’d have Universal Health Care.”
- THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says Americans still share the values enshrined in the Declaration of Independence 237 years ago and remain wary of too much government. It’s clear, too, that many aren’t happy with the government they’ve got.
- LOSER’S LEGACY: Obama’s Failed Foreign Policy continues as Obama’s historic Democracy in Egypt has turned to total crap as Obama has managed to alienate both sides in that bloody civil war. But don’t worry, Obama took time off for his 129th round of golf on July 4 and Obama’s Useless Secretary of State John Kerry said, “Fuck it, I’m going sailing on my wife’s yacht in Nantucket.”
NO WAY TO TREAT OUR HEROES: Here’s another sign Veterans are being treated like trash under the Obama Administration. The average claim for veteran benefits takes more than half a year to be processed.
Meanwhile, Former President George W. Bush thanks a soldier.
- TEA PARTY TERRORISTS: After focusing on the IRS scandal, Tea Party groups are targeting comprehensive immigration legislation that the House will take up after the Senate passed the “Gang of Eight” bill last week 68-32.
- WALL STREET WEAK: Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says the stock market has been in an odd spot for some time. Fear that the Federal Reserve would reduce its monthly bond-buying stimulus, designed to boost borrowing demand and help the U.S. economy, put investors in the position of rooting for just-OK data, the kind of figures that would keep the spigot open while still pointing to decent growth.
Liberalizing America
MEDIA MENDACITY: Fox is once again cowering to the President. In response to Obama’s complaint that FOX News doesn’t show enough Black and Hispanic people on their network, FOX has announced that they will now air “America ‘s Most Wanted” TWICE a week.- DEMOCRAT VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: You can hardly do anything in this country without ID. Why should our most important right not require proof of citizenship? Every voter ID proposal has included various ways to accommodate those few legal citizens who may not have ID. The feds instead choose to remove all proof of citizenship with things like motor voter laws for registration, only requiring a voter to state they are a citizen. Why is that? Have they never heard of Obama’s hometown of Chicago, where voters have been known to vote often and long after death?
- UNION BLUES: Republican congressional leaders are now demanding to know why Obama’s IRS pays hundreds of full-time employees to do union work and the National Teachers Union gave themselves a “Round Of Applause” for “Not Losing As Many Members As Projected.”
- OUR DEVOLVING CULTURE: We the People say much about the direction our culture is heading by the people we glorify, revere, and emulate. Columnist John Rocker asks what kind of life will there be for future generations when we tell ourselves and our children those who are the most morally and ethically bankrupt should be praised and mimicked simply because they have a nice jump shot.
- G-UN CONTROL: A high-powered rifle lost in Obama’s cover-ed up Fast and Furious scandal was used to kill a Mexican police chief in the state of Jalisco earlier this year.
More Unresolved Issues
- GAY NEWS UPDATE: The violence that has been threatened for years by homosexuals who are intolerant of those who espouse an opposing world view turned real at a “gay pride” event recently in Seattle, where authorities arrested two men for attacking a preacher.
- ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION: PMSNBC Idiot-in-Residence Chris Matthews came to a profound conclusion this week when he said, “I think Republicans don’t like illegal immigration.”
- RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: Liberal TV Talkers are now trying to whip up race riots in case the all white jury finds the first racist white Hispanic innocent of murdering poor misunderstood yoof Trayvon Martin, who looks just like the son Obama’s had always wished for, as supporters start a “Riot For Trayvon” Facebook Page. No wonder more Americans view Blacks as Racist than Whites or Hispanics.
- LEAKERS WELCOME: Presidents Daniel Ortega of Nicaragua and Nicolas Maduro of Venezuela said Friday they were willing to grant asylum to The Blower’s New Cyber-Spy Columnist Edward Snowden.
BABY-KILLING UPDATE: In Texas, the Pro-Abortion “Stand With Wendy” Crowd continues its lofty debate. Another Pro-Abortion Protester had a young girl holding a sign that said: “If I Wanted The Government In My Womb, I Would Fuck A Senator!” Now are you really surprised that people who support killing babies in the womb shout “Hail Satan?”- MURDERING MUSLIM UPDATE: Millions of Egyptians are in the streets after the ouster of President Mohamed Morsi and the Muslim Brotherhood regime in Egypt for their totalitarian theocratic policies. But many of America’s leading Islamists are sticking by Morsi and condemning the protesters on social media.
- THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY chose Sarah Palin’s “Let Allah Sort them Out.”
[ NOW CHECK OUT MORE GRUESOME PICTURES COURTESY OF THOSE PEACEFUL MUSLIMS]
Closer to Home
IN COLUMBUS: Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders Ohio RINO Party Boss Matt Borges sent out an email congratulating himself for everything he’d accomplished on the things he’d accomplished during his first month. The Blower was amazed he actually lasted the first month.- CAPITALS AT THE CAPITOL: TEA Party Guy Tom Zawistowski was complaining about how the mainstream news media was not only failing to capitalize the first letters of the words “Tea Party,” but were also not capitalizing the entire word “TEA.” since it stands for “Taxed Enough Already.” The Blower has always used “TEA Party,” ever since we helped publicize that first big “Taxed Enough Already” Rally on Fountain Square, back in 1990s. But some folks who haven’t gotten the word to capitalize “TEA Party” seem to include the Cincinnati Tea Party, Anderson Tea Party, Clermont Tea Party, Cincinnati East Tea Party, West Chester Tea Party, and the SouthWest Cincinnati Tea Party, wherever the hell that is.
- MAYORAL MADNESS: The Hamilton County Board of Elections presented prospective mayoral candidate Stacy Smith with some very bad news on Monday. She didn’t get enough signatures because six pages of signatures from two of her petitioners were thrown out when it was discovered the petitioners were registered to vote in Saint Bernard, which they mistakenly believed was in the City of Cincinnati. That’s OK, residents of Saint Bernard still get to pay Cincinnati City Income Tax, if they work in the City.
- IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Our Clermont Crony says since it was revealed that Clermont County Communications Director Annette Meager was given a job and is renting her apartment from one of the people who voted to give her that job, some are suggesting there may be more interesting information out there about Ms. Meager.
- IN ANDERSON: The Anderson Township Republican Central Committee (elected Precinct Executives) will be holding a meeting July 16 to interview potential candidates, now that Pouting Peggy Reis has decided to NOT run for another term as Anderson Township Trustee and most people believe The Blower will be announcing the Committee’s decision the day before.
Also in Anderson, it’s hard to believe it’s been an entire year since Disgraced Anderson Trustee Kevin O’Brien was arrested for masturbating in a Wellborn woman’s car, when Federal Judge Mike Barrett said he’d have to recuse himself from hearing Kevin’s landmark masturbation case, but he didn’t refuse to be called as an expert witness, and “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman said Anderson Trustees should burn $tate Rep-Tile for $ale Peter $tautberg at the stake for helping keep Kevin in office.
In Northern Kentucky
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo wonders if Dipsy DemocRAT Alison Lundergan Grimes is a serious candidate for Desperate DemocRATS to run against Bitch McConnell for Kentucky’s U.S. Senate seat? Obviously, the McConnell campaign doesn’t think so.
- LOCAL LEGAL UPDATE: That Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Still Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (Including the Lisa Wells Fan Club) continues to be amused, especially after Crazy Eric claimed his bimbo client Sarah Jones is not a “greedy nut job” before the replay of her $11 million lawsuit against a gossip website next week. Didn’t Crazy Eric get suspended again? Maybe he got a stay, but nobody really knows. The Blower can’t find a judge who’ll own up to signing off on it. What else would you expect from a media whore who couldn’t resist using his own uncle’s death get his own name in the paper on Saturday. Unbelievable.
More Political Insight This Week
FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: Metro Mole says there was no need for Scorn on the Fourth of July. Skaggie Maggie’s Idiotorial Board says, “Here’s what really makes America great: It’s not baseball, mom, or apple pie. It’s our ‘diversity.’ No kidding!”- REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES: For one reason only, Republicans for Higher Taxes are cheering The Supreme Court rulings that promote gay marriage. They feel it brings the country one step closer to what they call “Real Marriage Equality,” which means that any collection of at least two or more adults should have the right to marry each other. This includes a bisexual marriage of three, polygamy, group marriages, and incest marriages. Since the Supreme Court says, in the name of equality, that all marriages must be treated equally, how will they be able to reject honoring these sacred marriages along with all the others? Equality means equality. And where in the Constitution does it say only two people can be married to each other at the same time?
- GOING GALT: The difference between a DemocRAT and a prostitute is that a prostitute gives value for the money she takes.
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #190, says you should tell a joke: Q: What do you get when you offer a liberal a penny for his thoughts? A: Change.
- OBAMACARE UPDATE: The delay of part of the implementation of ObamaCare prompted Speaker of the House John Boehner to call the entire bill a “train wreck” and “unworkable.” of uninsured Americans are unaware they will be hit with a fine unless they buy Health Insurance. Now Obama’s hoping delaying the implementation of ObamaCare until after the 2014 will fool all of those Dumb Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Free-Stuff Grabbing Low-Information Obama Supporters one more time.
- POLITICS UNUSUAL: Down at Hamilton County RINO Party Headquarters, Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP tweeted for everybody not to worry just because there are only 65 more days until the September 10 Cincinnati Mayoral Primary Election. There’s still plenty of time to find a candidate. Maybe he plans to endorse Loony Libertarian Jim Berns, just like COAST appeared to do. Things like this never would’ve happened happened if Clean Gene Ruehlman were still alive.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES: This week, with Summer is well under way and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.
Sweltering Sensuality
Ah, the Summertime, the Summertime
With nature’s own sweet song.
And an errant breeze to show us,
Who’s wearing a flimsy thong.
FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane his reaction to Obama’s claim about Friday’s crappy jobs report, when Obama claimed it was is “a step in the right direction.” “That was one giant step for mankind,” Kane explained. “At this rate it’ll only take 297 more years to get back the 28 million jobs Obama lost.”- AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday we’ll be featuring our ObamaCare Focus Group E-dition and we’ll still be counting down the 1,292 days until Obama’s “historic” Third Term begins.
Tuesday is “National Sugar Cookie Day,” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” will try to remember to satisfy your sweet tooth.
Wednesday is “Teddy Bear Picnic Day,” so if you go down in the woods that day, you’re be in for a big surprise.
Thursday is “Cheer Up the Lonely Day,” and we’re sure all our Faux Facebook Friends will be hard at it.
The first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “In Cincinnati, this year’s mayor’s race.” Would you like The Blower to predict the winner?
And Saturday is “Fool’s Paradise Day,” when Cincinnati over-taxed payers will have another reason to celebrate.
Sunday Comix by Dixon Diaz
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Exclusive: Never-Aired ‘Apprentice’ Parody of Trump Firing Obama
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here
