Sunday, May 19, 2013
The Blower’s Week in Review
- OUR NUMBER ONE OBAMA SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was Obama’s State Department covering-up the terrorist attack in Benghazi, which took place seven weeks before the 2012 Elections. Every day, we find out more lies. Liberals continue to protect Hillary at all costs because Benghazi shows Disastrous DemocRATS can’t be trusted with life-or-death decisions, because when Liberals lie good people die.
- OUR NUMBER TWO OBAMA SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was Obama’s IRS targeting the TEA Party to help Obama get reelected in 2012. Maybe if some of those so-called low level Obama supporters at the Cincinnati IRS office are threatened with a few years in the slammer, they’ll rat out the higher ups who told them to commit their crimes.
- AND OUR NUMBER THREE OBAMA SCANDAL STORY THIS WEEK was the Obama’s Justice Department seized Phone Records or reporters and editors at the Dissociated Press and leak information to help Obama get re-elected. All those of these scandals are not an indictment of Obama, only the Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Supporters who re-elected him.
- MONDAY in our Special “Moms and MILFs” E-dition, The Blower said, “A MILF is a terrible thing to waste!”:
Even two years after the long-awaited death of Osama’s bin Laden, our Eternal War on Terror continues as Obamatized DemocRATS and their Willing Accomplices in the Liberal Press continue to ask why we’re still fighting. So with Armed Forces Day coming up on May 18, maybe it’s time to find out what our American heroes are really fighting for.
Duty? Honor? County? What really keeps our American Fighting Men going so far from home? That’s why yesterday on Mother’s Day, we asked some of lonely young heroes so far from home overseas and they told us what really kept them going was thinking about all those MILFs back home.
[READ MORE HERE]
- TUESDAY in our Special “IRS Targeting” E-dition, The Blower said, “Hey, Low Level Obama IRS Supporters—Target This!” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
We’re going to have a busy week in Washington, scheduling all those IRS and Benghazi hearings. —Republicans in Congress
We can’t believe the Benghazi Whistleblower who testified before those Witch-hunting Republicans in Congress voted for Hillary during the 2008 primaries and then voted for Obama twice. —Obama Supporters in the Press
Don’t any of those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Supporters realize Obama released his IRS Apology bombshell because of Benghazi? —Conservative Cynics
Really, what does it matter at this point? —Hillary, Hoping for Another Pass
On this date in 1999, Disgraced Former DemocRAT President Bill Clinton apologized to the Chinese for bombing their embassy in Belgrade, Yugoslavia. Nowadays, Rambo-bama doesn’t have time to apologize— he just keeps on droning, and our Glory Hound in the White House will be spiking the football every chance he gets for the next 1,346 days of Obama’s Second Term. —Hurley the Historian
With Obama’s IRS and Benghazi Scandals exploding all over Washington these days, it was no wonder our Campaigner-in-Chief just needed to get away, so he just hopped on Air Force One for three DemocRAT fund-raisers in NYC Monday afternoon. —Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard
[READ MORE HERE]
- WEDNESDAY in our Special “Nixonian Comparisons” E-dition, The Blower said, “Maybe we should just call it ‘Obamagate!’ ”
The first item in yesterday’s Blower predicted Republicans in Congress would be very busy this week scheduling all those IRS and Benghazi hearings. About a third of all House committees are investigating the Obama administration these days. Five separate committee are currently investigating Obama’s Benghazi cover-up, along with a probe into Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius’ illegally raising millions of dollars to promote Obamacare, just because House Republicans refused to approve giving her any more over-taxed payers’ funds.
Two separate House committees (Oversight and Government Reform, and Ways and Means) are already probing whether Obama’s IRS was targeting our TEA Party Patriots. The IRS acting director is scheduled to get his balls kicked at a hearing on Friday. Do you think somebody will call for his resignation?
Then Monday evening, some of Obama’s most ardent supporters at the Dissociated Press let slip that Obama’s Justice Department had secretly obtained reporters’ and editors’ phone records on more than 200 phone lines for two months straight. Maybe that subject will come up tomorrow if Obama’s Attorney General Eric Holder dares to show up for his fortuitously scheduled lambasting at Wednesday’s House Judiciary Committee hearing.
[READ MORE HERE]
- THURSDAY, in our Special “Obama’s Scandal Trifecta” E-dition, The Blower bet on, “Benghazi, IRS, and Spying on Reporters!”
Conservative Columnist Bernie Goldberg says he doesn’t like reading the New York Times in the morning because he’s always afraid his head will explode and that would make it difficult to go through the rest of the day (When Is a Scandal Not a Scandal).
People in Cincinnati have much the same feeling whenever they read The Morning Fishwrap. Take Deirdre Shesgreen’s Obama-approved piece (IRS flub blamed on poor management) that attempted to excuse all those so-called low level Obama Supporters in Cincinnati for illegally targeting TEA Party organizations to help Obama get reelected last year was because Obama’s Inspector General claimed the IRS had merely “developed and implemented inappropriate criteria.”
It was also as bad as Sharon Coolidge’s front-page excuses for local DemoCRAT Vote Frauders— they were “confused.” Those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Supporters will believe anything.
[READ MORE HERE]
- FRIDAY in our Special “Spotlight on Cincinnati” E-dition, The Blower said, “Where every Presidential Campaign Donation from the Cincinnati IRS Office went to Obama in 2012!”
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Cincinnati is now the butt of jokes all over the country again this week because of those so-called “Rogue Agents” at the Cincinnati IRS Office who targeted TEA Party patriots to help Obama get re-elected last year.
But so far, the City’s embarrassment is less than that time Girly Mayor Mark Mallory threw out the first pitch at Opening Day.
Republican Hamilton County Prosecutor “JayWaking Joe” Deters can hardly wait to begin holding hourly press conferences to report progress in his own investigation of all those Obama Supporters in the Cincinnati IRS Office for possible state civil rights violations. Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1973, the US Senate began the Watergate Hearings. The JayWalker should be sure to mention that. Deters’ Buddy Ohio GOP Attorney General Mike DeWhine says, “We could prosecute those Dishonest DemocRATS under state law, regardless of the Supremacy Clause of the Constitution that generally prohibits states from imposing criminal sanctions on federal officials for actions taken in discharge of their federal duties. Deters’ other employer $tan Che$ley says “This would be a great time to file a humongous class action suit, if only I hadn’t been disbarred. And Deters’ cousin Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters says, “Call CNN. I’ll defend the IRS lawbreakers pro bono.”
Not to be outdone, “JayWalking Joe” is preparing a motion to volunteer Hamilton County to try that fellow who kidnapped those three women in Cleveland for a decade, since his public defender lawyer told that judge he needed a chage of venue since his kidnapping rapist client couldn’t possibly get a fair trial in Cuyahoga County.
Our Feckless Fishwrappers are really scrambling to interview all of those IRS criminals in Cincinnati. Not to worry, Obama Supporters at the IRS— Perry Kimball promises he’ll keep your names secret, just like he did for those “new attorneys” for Elmwood Place who called Judge Ruehlman “biased.” It’s a good thing our Society of Unprofessional Journalists extended the deadline for their best stories of 2010. Al Schottlekottee is turning over in his grave.
[READ MORE HERE]
- SATURDAY in our Special “Honoring the Military” E-dition, The Blower said, “Send a salami to your boy in the Army!”
The third Saturday in May has been officially designated as the day to salute all of the men and women in all branches of the service who protect you and your country. They can be called upon at a moment’s notice to put their lives on the line to ensure your freedoms, so a little gratitude on your part today wouldn’t hurt.
Each branch of the military used to have its own celebration, but Hurley the Historian says on August 31, 1949 then Secretary of Defense Louis Johnson announced the creation of Armed Forces Day. President Harry Truman also announced the holiday in a presidential proclamation on February 20, 1950. All branches of the military were asked to celebrate on the same day and they complied on the first Armed Forces Day which was held the following year on May 20, 1950.
And appropriately our Quote for Today Committee has chosen this from Jan Scruggs, Founder of the Vietnam Veterans Memorial: “The Price of Freedom is Never Free.” Luckily Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane found somebody willing to buy lunch for a veteran today.
[READ MORE HERE]
IS IT COLLECTION TIME AGAIN?
It must be, since your Neighborhood News Boy or Girl will be stopping by to collect $3.50 for delivery of this month’s Blower. The children retain half of this amount plus any tips you give them to reward good service.
This month we’re featuring “Gex” Wanker, a bright little 9-year-old Bluegrass boy at Ridgerunner Elementary School, whose cruel classmates continue to taunt him mercilessly, not just because he’s years older than the other kindergartners, but because his name “Gex” rhymed with “Sex.” For information about our carrier program, please call Mr. Scamwell at our circulation department.
Obamanations
- OBAMA SCANDAL UPDATE: The Obama Administration is both incompetent and corrupt. Even Rush Limbaugh now agrees with The Blower that the IRS apology out of the blue and then the AP Scandal were only distraction from the Benghazi scandal. And El Rushbo says all of this is bigger than Obama, It’s what happens when Liberals are in charge.
- OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE has a two-for: After Ousted IRS Commission Steven Miller said, “I did not mislead Congress or the American people,” Republican Dave Camp, chairman of the House of Representatives Ways and Means Committee, said, “That isn’t being misled. That’s lying.” After which, the ousted IRS Chief said, “We Need A “Bigger Budget” to prevent future targeting of Conservatives.
- ROGUE’S GALLERY: The number of rogue agents at the IRS Office in Cincinnati has grown from two to five.
- WHITE HOUSE MASOCHISM: Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard says, “For me personally, it has been a good week.”
- CROOKS IN CONGRESS: If your Congressman wasn’t on one of those committees investigating Obama’s scandals this week, he probably had a pretty easy time.
- OBAMANOMICS 101: The non-partisan Congressional Budget Office on Friday said President Obama’s 2014 budget proposal would add $5.2 trillion in deficits over 10 years. And just like the House Republican’s repeal of ObamaCare, it doesn’t have a chance of passing.
- WALL STREET WEAK: Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says everybody’s waiting for a “Stock Market Correction,” and when it comes, it’ll be a doozy.
Meanwhile, DemocRATS Announce Their Dream Ticket for 2016.
Liberalizing America
- MEDIA MENDACITY: Obama Supporters in the Press aren’t really outraged with the Obama administration. They’re just a little out of sorts over the AP scandal. The Blower predicts they’ll quickly return to defending Obama and will soon begin attacking Republicans over the scandals.
- DEMOCRAT VOTER FRAUD: On Wednesday, the Hamilton County Board of Elections turned up two more possible instances of DemocRAT voter fraud crimes.
- UNION BLUES: Deep in the list of taxes that the president’s Obamacare plan will hit Americans with is a 40% excise tax on health plans typical union members have, especially in Midwest states, according to a new analysis.
More Politics Unusual
- OBAMACARE UPDATE: This week, the Republican-led House voted, for the 37th time, to repeal ObamaCare, even though GOP lawmakers know the 37th time won’t be the charm for Disingenuous DemocRATs in the Senate to agree.
- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “This week will mark the 37th time House Republicans have tried to repeal ObamaCare. If Republicans really wanted to do away with ObamaCare they should just endorse it as a conservative non-profit and let the IRS take it down. Obama announced the appointment of a new acting commissioner of the IRS — the other guy was fired. See, they’re called “acting commissioner” because you have to act like the scandal doesn’t involve the White House. And a lot of critics are now comparing President Obama to President Nixon. The good news for Obama? At least he’s no longer being compared to President Carter.”
- TEA PARTY PRINCIPLES: TEA Party groups across the nation are now planning to sue the IRS for targeting them to help Obama get re-elected in 2012 and $tan Che$ley says, “This would be a great time to file a humongous class-action suit, if only I hadn’t been disbarred.”
- THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says, “Another day, another controversy? It must have seemed that way lately to the Obama administration, but will it matter? Voters are sending mixed signals so far.” The strongest voter reaction can be found in response to the Internal Revenue Service’s targeting of Tea Party and other conservative groups. Most voters believe the targeting was politically motivated and 57% think most of those involved should be fired or jailed. 55% think it is at least somewhat likely that Obama or his top aides were aware of the IRS’ actions.
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1935, Lawrence of Arabia died, but the movie didn’t come out till 1962, and maybe that’s why The Blower remembers that classic line from the movie when Peter O’Toole said, “There may be honor among thieves, but there’s none in politicians.”
- SHAMELESS SOLICITING: The Blower wonders how many Republican elected officials and Conservative groups are using the IRS scandal to raise money. At the very least, they should be asking their constituents to send in information about IRS misconduct so they could turn it over to investigators on the House Ways and Means Committee.
More Unresolved Issues
- G-UNCONTROL: Bluegrass Rifle Association Spokesman Billy Bob Carbine says, “Never mess with whjat’s in this lady’s purse.”
- ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION: The White House says Obama plans to meet with Republican Senator John McRINO on Wednesday to discuss ongoing efforts to pass amnesty for future DemocRAT voters. Meanwhile, the Obama Administration is granting legal status to 99.2% of the illegal immigrants who apply.
- RACIAL HEALING: Former NAALCP Chairman Julian Bond, said it was “entirely legitimate” for the IRS to target the TEA Party. Locally, SMLP Smithermouth said he’ll have to call Chris Finney at COAST before he responds.
- GAY NEWS UPDATE: When the Boys Scouts meet in Dallas on May 22-24, will Rob “Fighting for Fancy Boys” Portman be a guest scoutmaster?
- OBAMA’S IMPEACHMENT: Here’s the best reason we know NOT to impeach Obama: Joe Biden.
- BABY-KILLING WTF: Planned Parenthood is running a new abortion ad: “Your Baby Will Thank You.”
- MURDERING MUSLIM UPDATE: On 30 of the FBI’s most wanted terrorists are Muslim.
[ NOW CHECK OUT THESE GRUESOME PICTURES COURTESY OF THOSE PEACEFUL MUSLIMS]
Closer to Home
- MAYORAL MADNESS: The First Official TV Attack Ad of the Cincinnati Mayoral Campaign belongs to Disguised DemocRAT John Cranley, going after unabashed Liberal DemocRAT Foxy Roxy Qualls for backing pissing away another $17.4 million on Girly Mayor Mark Mallory’s Trolley Folly.
- MORE THE FISHWRAP MISSED: So exactly why was there a political campaign car festooned with “Cranley for Mayor” on the doors illegally parked inside Cincinnati police district 1 parking on Friday? Surely the Beav wasn’t attending the Police Memorial Service, given his historic anti-police actions on Clowncil.
Meanwhile at District 1, why does departing fourteen star not-an-Ohio-police-officer James Craig continue to trash talk revered former Real Police Chief Tom Streicher and claim credit for the last ten years’ of work by the entire department? The troops are getting tired of this carpetbagger’s mouth and can’t wait to see him go.
And while they’re at it, people should check out Craig’s increasingly elaborate credentials. In the Detroit Free Press, he now claims to have been leader of the LAPD black police union during the Rodney King riots and to have commanded about half the department under iconic chief Bill Bratton. Ask Bratton if he’s ever heard of his supposed protégé.
- “REIN IN THE IRS” RALLY: You’ll probably see a lot of American flags Tuesday at noon Downtown on Fountain Square when local TEA Partiers try to get on national TV with their big “Reign in the IRS Rally,” after which they could always storm the IRS Offices in the Federal Building and drag all those Obama-Loving TEA-Party Targeting IRS Agents back to Fountain Square for a little non-partisan tar-and-feathering.
- IN COLUMBUS: State Rep-tile John Becker keeps giving them shit up in Columbus. The Dispatch quoted him as follows: “Rep. John Becker, a Cincinnati-area Republican, said he was concerned that source material under Common Core could require reading Environmental Protection Agency manuals, Greenpeace writings, and allow for the ‘liberal, socialist indoctrination of our children.’” It’s about time we’ve got somebody up there calling out those commie bastards.
Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Ohio Republicans can’t stop crowing about two Buckeye Congressmen sitting on the House Ways and Means Committee investigating Obama’s IRS these days. Watch videos of Congressman Jim Renacci and Congressman Pat Tiberi in action questioning lying IRA Weasel this week.
- FOOLS IN SCHOOLS: As a retirement present for Sharon (pronounced Shan) Johnson, retiring Wifrow Principal, the yoofs broke out into a big fight Friday night at their graduation ceremony.
- TROUBLE-MAKING OVER-TAXED PAYER TINO DELGATO says Cincinnati is trying to sell their parking to raise immediate revenues. Yet the city allows hundreds of prime spot parking meters to be used for free by red valet bags. In the old days one could go downtown and park at these meters for free after 6PM. Now we pay $7 or more to watch a valet park our cars at these same meters. We can only hope that Chief Craig takes Mayor Mallory and the City Manager with him to Detroit. Now that would be addition by subtraction. Go Figure!!!
- PATHETIC POLITICS: Did the Hamilton County GOP Committee on Candidate Nominations really only recommended four candidates for Republican Endorsement for the nine seats on Cincinnati City Clown-cil this year? Whatever happened to the five candidates they endorsed last time? Conceding any chance of a majority, this gives Alex more time than ever to visit Findlay Market on the weekends and go to Reds games, Finance Director Maggie Wuellner will not have to sacrifice any shoe-shopping time and Ashtray’s DemocRAT allies won’t feel threatened.
- WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR SPOILED SPORTS EDITOR ANDY FURBALL says Oxbow won the big Preakness race in Maryland, and wouldn’t it be funny if John Coyne and all the usual suspects were smoking outside the Landing in New Richmond on Friday night, when the lady with a wooden leg said her daughter (one of the original strippers at Deja Vu) never missed a Preakness and Clem from Clermont asked the daughter if that wasn’t a pretty long drive. “Of course not,” the daughter said, “It’s only about eight miles to River Downs.”
In Northern Kentucky
- PICK THE CHICK CONTEST: The latest and greatest e-dition of Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth’s Attorney E Rob Sanders healthy and delicious e-newsletter is on cyber news stands now. This week’s This Week In Kenton Circuit Court features the usual bags… as in scum-bags, dirt-bags, and ho-bags… but alas, our favorite feature is the return of the Robster’s always amusing game of “Pick the Chick”! See if you can figure out which of the ugly mugs is actually female. Check out the Robster’s rag to see if you’re correct.
- CONTEMPT IN COURT: Members of the Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Still Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (including the Lisa Wells WLW Fan Club) say were highly amused when prosecutors took aim at Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters at a pre-trial hearing in a Burlington courtroom on Wednesday. Local prosecutors have seen Deters ignore court rules and judges’ orders ever since he wandered into criminal courts, pretending he knows what he’s doing. After years of Deters’ shenanigans, however, our true defenders of the public have grown tired of his tactics and are now calling him out for the shyster he (allegedly) is! Prosecutors like lovely lady Linda Tally Smith say there’s no doubt Deters has arrogantly ignored judicial orders. They say the only question now is do those on the bench have the balls to back up their orders with sanctions?!
More Political Insight This Week
- FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: When Perry KimBall wrote a big story about the “new attorneys” for Elmwood Place calling Judge Ruehlman “biased,” was KimBall doing the “new attorneys” a big favor when he didn’t actually report “the new attorneys” names, or did KimBall miss that first day in Journalism 101 when they tell you the first paragraph of every story should report the “who, what, where, when, and why” of the story? It’s a good thing the Society of Unprofessional Journalists extended the deadline for their best stories of 2010. They’ll need a whole new category for KimBall.
Coincidentally, that deadline for Cincinnati Pro Chapter of the Society of Unprofessional Journalists “Best Stories of 2010 Contest” was supposed to be on Friday, but the group’s latest e-mail says ”we will take last-minute hand deliveries up to 5 p.m., Monday, May 23.” The only problem is, May 23 is next Thursday.
- GOING GALT: If Obama’s AP Scandal endangering Freedom of the Press this week doesn’t make you think of George Orwell’s “1984,” we don’t know what will.
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #135 is to find a feminist and see if she has a sense of humor:
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be open when she brings it to you.
- NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (OUR OFFENSIVE OCTEGENARIAN), THE BARD OF CLEVES: Just in time for what used to be the Drive-in Movie Season, we found this licentious limerick by our old friend Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves, from his latest book, “Remembering When,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
“Friday Night Fun”
The demise of the drive-in is sad
There was so much fun to be had
To hell with the movie
There was something more groovy
To make all the sex organs glad.
- FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about that “False Narrative” the Obama Administration put out in the days immediately following the September 11, 2012 terrorist in Libya, just seven weeks before the 2012 Elections.”You can call it a false narrative or disinformation if you wish,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, “but at The Blower, we just call it a lie.”
- AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday we’ll waiting to see if we’ve been audited by Obama’s IRS because of all of fair-and-balanced reporting of Obama’s Scandals and we’ll still be counting down the 1,341 days until Obama’s “historic” Third Term begins.
Tuesday we’ll be covering that big “Rein in IRS Rally” on Fountain Square to see if it got covered on Network TV and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” analyze the latest Obama Scandals.
Wednesday we’ll be celebrating “Buy a Musical Instrument Day,” or you can just listen to Pandora on your computer.
Thursday will be “Lucky Penny Day,” and you can be sure The Blower will be putting in its two-cents worth.
The first line of Friday’s limerick is: “Each year at the Taste of the “Natti.”
And on Saturday, we’ll be seeing just how patriotic we can be during the Memorial Day Weekend.
Sunday Comix
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Jon Stewart Obama should have used Prince Harry as a shield
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.