Special “It’s Mayday in America!” Edition

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

More Mayday Distress Signals

  • BY JOVE, I THINK HE’S GOT IT: At Tuesday’s press conference, after Obama had struggled to pass key components of his second term agenda during the first 100 days, did Obama really say, “Maybe I should just pack up and go home?” Even for all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Voters who re-elected him, the last 1,359 days of Obama’s historic administration will seem like an eternity!
  • THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says only 2% favor Congress exempting itself from ObamaCare. Voters couldn’t be much clearer: Members of Congress and their staffers must be subject to the full requirements of Obama’s national health care law, just like the rest of us.
  • HERE’S WHAT WE’VE LEARNED SO FAR FROM THE BOSTON MASSACRE: The War on Terror is not over. Islam is not a peaceful religion. Racial Profiling works. And Political Correctness Kills.
  • STATE-SPONSORED TERRORISM: The Tsarnaev family, including the suspected terrorists and their parents, benefited from more than $100,000 in over-taxed payer-funded assistance — a bonanza ranging from cash and food stamps to Section 8 housing from 2002 to 2012. Is Obama’s America a great place to live or what?
  • HONESTY DAY OXYMORON: Honest Lawyer.
  • POETIC JUSTICE: Twinkies Return (Union Free).
  • image007HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1931, President Herbert Hoover officially dedicated New York City’s Empire State Building, pressing a button from the White House that turned on the building’s lights. The Whistleblower learned that Hoover’s gesture was only symbolic, because while the president remained in Washington, someone else flicked the switches in New York. The Whistleblower also learned that although the Empire State Building opened in 1931, King Kong didn’t actually scale the skyscraper until 1933.
  • NO WONDER OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose “An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building and after 50 floors says, ‘So far so good!'”
  • IN COLUMBUS: Buckeye Bureau Chef Gerry Manders says no sooner had the Republican State Central Committee selected Tax Scofflaw Matt Borges to be their new Party Boss instead of Tea Party Rabble-Rouser Tom Zawistowski, the Party sent out an e-mail groveling for a $5, $25, $55 or more donation “right now” and show your support for our new Chairman. The Blower wonders how all our Tea Party Patriots on the mailing list reacted to that message.

Also in Columbus, Republicans for Higher Taxes is celebrating the election of convicted criminal and serial tax cheat Matt Borges to be the next Ohio Republican Party Chairman. They ask everyone to give Borges a piece of advice as he prepares to take the throne.

They also thank State Central Committee Traitor Bob McEwen, who not only turned his back on his supporters by voting for Borges, but actually seconded his nomination. McEwen ran as a conservative who could be counted on to do the right thing. But Real Conservatives say when the opportunity presented itself to side with a convicted criminal, he wasted no time jumping ship.

  • image010STILL CALLING ALL TRI-STATE JOURNALISTS! The Cincinnati Pro Chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists is still looking for Your Best Work from 2010. Send in your entries today. Contact Tom McKee, Greater Cincinnati SPJ President, at Channel 9 “Substantially True” News.
  • IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Tea Party Guy Ted Stevenot wonders if you can guess what the top 100 average 2012 salaries were for the Milford Exempted Village and West Clermont School districts. Do you think those schools just might have a stealth tax hike on the March 7 ballot? BTW, has the MILF-ord Board of Education ever done anything to collect all that over-taxed payers’ money they were supposed to get for Obama VP Buffoon Joe Biden’s Mediscare Stump Speech at the MILF-ord High School cafeteria in September?
  • IN ANDERSON: will our Tea Party Patriots be publishing similar information, since the Forest Gump School District is trying to sneak through its own Stealth Tax increase next Tuesday? Don’t say we The Blower didn’t try to warn you.

 image012Also at the Anderson Government Center, many good seats are still available for tonight’s meeting of the Anderson Township Republican Club Including Newtown and Mt. Washington, when Hamilton County RINO Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP not only updates the group on DemocRAT Voter Fraud in Hamilton County, but also his latest criticism of Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka for endorsing incompetent black DemocRAT women like Juvenile Court Judge Tracie Hunter, attorney Janaya Trotter who last year unsuccessfully challenged Republican Prosecutor “JayWalking Joe” Deters, and new Cincinnati City Councilwoman Pamula Thomas.

BTW, Republican Hamilton County Commission President Chris Monzel says Incompetent Black Woman Judge Tracie Hunter will not be getting any over-taxed payers’ money to hire her own lawyer to defend herself against two lawsuits filed by The Fishwrap and a third suit from Channel 9 “Substantially True” News, and how dare she throw Perry Kimball out of her courtroom, after all the free unbiased publicity he has given her. Does The Blower stick up for up-and-coming journalists or what!

  • SEVENTY-SIX TROMBONES: Our reader Edna writes in: “After you mentioned hiring a band to play when Cincinnati police chief James Craig resigns to go to Detroit, I asked my lunch friends how much they’d be willing to contribute to hire a brass band to serenade him on his way out. We have $231.47 committed, so far.” “Only trouble is, even a city like Detroit doesn’t want Craig. Sadly, I think we are stuck with him for the present time.”
  • CONGRESSIONAL CARP: Ohio Second District Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup hopes to get his name in The Fishwrap by promoting Free Fishing Days in Ohio this weekend. Unlicensed anglers may pick up their Free Fishing License at his District Office, conveniently located at 7954 Beechmont Avenue in Anderson Township.
  • image013LEGAL UPDATE: When The Blower beat Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters’ brains out after he tried to sue us for libel, it wasn’t the only local libel case we ever covered. Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo remembers 22 Years Ago This Week (when The Whistleblower used to be printed and delivered all over town) Edition #48, which came out on April 30, 1991 featured a story about how the U.S. Supreme Court upheld The Blower’s right to call the now defunct Kentucky Post a “libelous rag.”
  • ALSO IN NoKY: Boondoggle County Judge Executive Gary NO Moore and Campbell County Judge Executive Steve “Don’t Call Me Carrot-Sticks” Spendery traveled to Frankfort so Spendery could give NO Moore some nursing home beds. Yes, these two “leaders” appeared in a hearing to ask the legislature to approve a special suspension of the current regulations for their private business transaction. Each provided contradictory testimony and it became indoor sport for the legislators. Their special deal was shot down big time, but what can you expect after NO Moore stated he already had the roads and Spendery confessed that he did not need the beds for the next ten years. One legislator continued to tweak the pair and asked if their roads ran just one way.

2014 Campbell Judge Candidate Kevin “Give Em Hell” Sell after receiving the hearing records wasted no time issuing a press release. Give Em Hell said he was “sick and tired” of Campbell County always coming in second place to NO Moore and Sendery’s regionalism. NO Moore said thinks I-275 is west bound only. Stay tuned. 

In other action, The Blower is again ahead of The Fishwrap on late-breaking news in the NoKY GOP. Seems they are having a Lincoln Day Dinner, but it’s going to be in June. Sources say that Massie, McConnell, and somebody from the NoKY Tea Party will be speaking. The Blower thought both Massie and McConnell claim to be Tea Party Guys. Area Republicans are wondering what the hell all this means and D-RATS have said this is great news as things like this always help them. Sure it does. 

  • FINALLY AT YESTERDAY’S BRIBE LUNCH where a politician was trying to get some unsubstantiated rumor about his opponent in The Blower, Charles Foster Kane was all those Liberal cartoons mocking the Bush Library (including that one in The Fishwrap), our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher said, “Can you imagine they’ve already built the Obama Presidential Library, and it’s already full of everything he knows.

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MAYDAY HOT LINE

e-mail your distress calls today.

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Some alarming items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally alarming subscribers.

LINK OF THE DAY

BOB THE HAMSTER  (Be sure to watch until the end)

image020Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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