Sunday, February 10, 2013
The Blower’s Week in Review
OUR NUMBER STORY THIS WEEK was wondering what additional tax-and-spending Obama will be proposing in Tuesday night’s State of Dis-Union Speech to Congress.- OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEK was about local reaction after Kentucky Senator Rand Paul gives the Tea Party Response to Obama’s State of Dis-Union Speech.
- AND OUR NUMBER THREE STORY THIS WEEK was wondering if anybody would noticed if “Mean Jean” Schmidt crashed Obama’s State of Dis-Union Speech this year.
MONDAY in our Annual “Ka-Ha-Rat Su-Per” E-dition, The Blower The Blower explained that it to placate the masses, you must offer them bread and circuses.
And we explained that olden rituals have lost their meaning. They just aren’t the same anymore, since they’re rooted hundreds, sometimes thousands of years in antiquity and they’re not really relevant to what’s happening today.
Reporting on Mideast violence from Israel this weekend, Noted Israeli Religious Reporter Yitzhak Tadwell said recently on a hill near Bethlehem, a shepherd watching his flocks by night tripped over a stone tablet. Biblical scholars labored long and hard to decipher the ancient Aramaic writing. But now they don’t want to tell us what it says.
[READ MORE HERE]
TUESDAY in our Special “Super Bowl Post Game” E-dition, The Blower asked, “Is the Hype Over Yet?” and “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
Nothing says what’s right with Obama’s America like millions of under-employed, Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Supporters watching millionaire athletes inflict concussions on each other in-between scores of over-hyped $3.8 million 30-second TV commercials as the nation plunged further into debt, coming to you live from the All-American Mercedes-Benz Super Dome, as Adipose Americans consumed 1.23 billion more chicken wings and a little beer in sports bars across the country and at home. —The Moral Minority
People were hoping I’d say how “fucking awesome it was” again when I appeared on David Letterman’s show Monday night. —Baltimore Ravens quarterback and Super Bowl MVP Joe Flacco
Sunday night’s Super Bowl may have been the most watched event in history, but we expect an even bigger audience when Obama delivers his first State of Dis-Union Address during his Second Term next week on Lincoln’s Birthday. —Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard
Just as The Blower predicted, Coach Harbaugh’s team won the Super Bowl. —Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall
San Francisco might’ve won with a few more gay players. —Whistleblower Alternative Life-Style Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis
[READ MORE HERE]
WEDNESDAY in our Special “Reagan’s 102nd Birthday” E-dition,The Blower reported the Reagan family had told our local GOP to take his name off this year’s RINO event, as we remembered the Gipper:
Hurley the Historian said Ronald Reagan was born on this date in 1911. Reagan’s birthday is a High Holy Day for Conservatives, especially during these trying times, and Real Republicans are asking, “What would He do today?
If The Gipper were alive today, here’s what he might say about the Obama Administration:
“Government does not solve problems; it subsidizes them.”
Instead of “Morning in America, it would be “Mourning in America.”
About today’s economy, Reagan might say: “Recession is when a neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours.”
About RINOs and DemocRATS in Congress, Reagan might say:
“Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets.”
[READ MORE HERE]
THURSDAY, in our Special “Obama’s Killer Drones” E-dition, The Blower said, “Look up in the sky—it’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s a Killer Drone!”
Then we droned on and one with Obama’s Justice Department says Obama’s Killer Drone Strikes are legal, even when they kill American citizens. Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard says Obama’s Killer Drone Strikes were not only “legal,” but also “ethical” and “wise.” No Kidding!
Meanwhile, our Clowns in Congress are considering putting limits on Killer Drone strikes, much the same as they’re avoiding all sorts of measures to reduce violence with “Gun Control,” reforming “Illegal Immigration,” and “Sequester Cuts.” Lawmakers in at least 11 states are proposing various restrictions on the use of drones amid concerns the unmanned aerial vehicles could be exploited by local authorities to spy on Americans. Hereabouts, everybody’s waiting for the City of Cincinnati to ban Killer Drones over City skies, and pledge to abstain from similar uses with city-owned, leased, or borrowed
[READ MORE HERE]
FRIDAY in our Special “Ignoring National News” E-dition, The Blower said it was because everybody knows “All politics is local!” and you can’t get much localer than this:
IN CLERMONT COUNTY: These days the Cronies can hardly believe it’s been an entire year since The Blower devoted its entire e-dition to the Archie Wilson Scandal, and they all asked us to reprise out Top Ten List in Archie’s Honor.
So once again, it was the top ten reasons the Resigned in Disgrace Former Clermont County Commissioner Archie Wilson traded drugs for sex with hooker who called herself “Amanda Lay” at a sleazy motel in Northern Kentucky:
10. I forgot
9. The dog ate it
8. She told me she loved me
7. I did it to help the homeless
6. The Devil made me do it
5. I just wanted to be loved–is there anything wrong with that?
4. I’m a Tea Party Republican
3. I was framed
2. This whole thing is just one big terrible mistake
…and the Number One Reason Resigned in Disgrace Former Clermont County Commissioner Archie traded drugs for sex with hooker who called herself Amanda Lay at a sleazy motel in Northern Kentucky is… the guys at GOP Headquarters and the campaign manager of my first political campaign for Batavia Township Trustee (none other than That Corrupt Evicted Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Bought-and-paid-For Tax-and-Spend RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch Mean Jean Schmidt) said nobody would ever find out.
Editor’s Note: We’ve successfully used the format for this Whistleblower Top Ten List for every sex scandal for more than twenty two years, ever since 1991 when The Whistleblower used to be printed and delivered all over all over town. Items 4. (in this case “I’m a Tea Party Republican”) and the Number One people who said “nobody would ever find out” have always been changed, according to whom the Top Ten List was dedicated. Amazingly, it’s just as good today as it ever was.
[READ MORE HERE]
SATURDAY in our Annual “Chinese New Year” E-dition, The Blower was partying like it was still 4710!
Oriental Observer One Lo Ball said Sunday would begin the “Year of the Snake” and after Obama’s re-election in November, Conservatives were already acknowledging that a Divided America will still have to kowtow to the Chinese for at least 1,441 more days during the Dark Ages of Obama’s Second Term.
Last year was the Year of the Dragon, and Real Republicans still haven’t gotten over the fact that Saint Mitt didn’t slay the Dragon on November 6.
The year before was the “Year of the Rabbit” with more comparisons between Obama and Jimmy Carter (remember that “Killer Rabbit?”)
The year before was the “Year of the Tiger,” which had to be held up until our disgraced golf star Tiger Woods got out of sex rehab.
The year before that was the “Year of the Ox,” which seemed more fitting, considering all those Dumb-Ox DemocRATS and BureaucRATS The Blower was always writing about. Maybe nominations for our King and Queen of the Oxymorons should still be open.
The year before that was the “Year of the Rat,” and we all remember who won that. The year before that was the “Year of the Pig” and who’ll ever forget our Queen of the Pig People? “Mean Jean” remembers when it was the “Year of the Bitch.” Does anybody remember “The Year of the Cock?” No wonder Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis are still using that year’s calendar. According to The Blower’s alternate life-style contributors, that was a very good year. Actually, it was the “Year of the Rooster,” but we just like to say “Cock,” so all you wussies with dirty-words filters on your computers won’t get today’s e-dition and you’ll all be wondering what else you’ve missed.
[READ MORE HERE]
Seediest Kids of All
The Whistleblower’s 63nd Annual Seediest Kids of All Campaign (not associated with the Failed United Way) began continues throughout the year.
We’ve featuring some truly inspirational stories about the waifs and urchins we claim to have helped in Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky, just so you’ll believe we actually give a big rat’s ass.
Why don’t we have a more traditional holiday guilt campaign like the rest of the news media? No charity made our publisher its president in exchange for free publicity and our endorsement, we don’t have a fat weatherman turned radio talk-show host who was never actually convicted of beating up his girlfriend, and all the really good dead celebrities other than Harriet Beecher Stowe, “Clean Gene” Ruehlmann, and “BeanBall Jim” Bunning have already been taken.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
More Politics Unusual
- RECOVERING REPUBLICANS: Dr. Benjamin Carson delivered a noteworthy National Prayer Breakfast keynote speech in Obama’s presence. Carson attacked political correctness as a “dangerous” threat to free speech and encouraged Americans to boldly share their views. The pediatric neurosurgeon also provided his theories about the national debt, deficits, taxation and health care, taking stances that were in opposition to the President’s. Obama watched intently as Carson spoke for more than 25 minutes, according to Revered Former Congressman Bob Mcewen, who’s been one of four hosts that put on the NPB for 31 years and started most of the applause for Carson.
- DISHONEST DEMOCRATS: Jesse Jackson Jr. signed a plea deal in that Federal Probe into his many illegal activities. Besides spending time in the slammer, Jessie Junior will have to repay the government hundreds of thousands of dollars for items like his $40,000 Rolex watch, travel expenses for a woman he described as a “social acquaintance” and furniture purchased for his home.
- MEDIA MENDACITY: Ann Coulter followed The Blower’s lead when she said, “You really wonder if DemocRATS would win any elections if we had an honest media.”
- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER didn’t like David Letterman’s “The Republican Party has its own line of clothing. The problem is it keeps coming apart at the seams.”
- THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says what voters want isn’t often what they get. Case in point: President Obama has indicated that gun control and immigration reform are his top priorities for the year and will be central to his State of the Union address this coming Tuesday night. But voters rate government spending and job creation as far more important issues than either gun control or immigration.
- CLOWNS IN CONGRESS: This week, Republican House Speaker John Boehner coined “Obamaquester” as a new word for “Sequestration,” as Republicans continue trying to pin the blame on Obama for the upcoming automatic spending cuts.
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1996 Russian world chess champion Gary Kasparov lost the first game of a six-game match against Deep Blue, an IBM computer capable of evaluating 200 million moves per second. “That’s no big deal,” says Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters. “One time I played 93 games of chess simultaneously and I lost every game!”
Obama’s Economy
OBAMANOMICS 101: Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says Obama will try to re-focus his upcoming State of the Dis-Union address on boosting job creation and economic growth at a time of high unemployment. That sounds just like last year’s State of the Dis-Union Speech to us.- WALL STREET WEAK: Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says investors are talking about some troubling signs that the Dow Jones Industrial Average may not be staying above 14,000 anytime soon. (The all-time high of 14,164 was reached on October 9, 2007.)
- ROMNEYDAMUS WAS RIGHT: ObamaCare will push seven million people out of their job-based insurance coverage (nearly twice the previous estimate), according to the Congressional Budget Office. Do you think all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span Obama Voters thought something like this could ever happen?
More Unresolved Issues
G-UNCONTROL: Bluegrass Rifle Association Spokesman Billy Bob Carbine says there’s been a lot of controversy about whether Obama actually goes skeet shooting, so the White House released an official photo of the president doing just that. The Bluegrass Rifle Association, however, was rather slightly skeptical.- ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION: Congressman almost everybody agrees that something must be done to solve the illegal immigration problem, and that’s where the area of agreement ends.
- RACIAL HEALING: Deranged DemocRAT Congressman Elijah Cummings says cutting Post Office Saturday deliveries would be racist, just like everything else black members of Congress don’t like.
- GAY NEWS UPDATE: Commenting on Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall pictures in Thursday’s e-dition showing the difference between the blatant hetero-sexual fans in Baltimore and kissing fags in San Francisco, Whistleblower Alternative Life-Style Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKevis say it looked like it could have been one of the bars we were in on Sunday out in San Francisco. The beer was flowing. We gay guys know that football requires beer. Now those Baltimore fans, on the other hand, seem to be in a fenced-in area of some sort without adequate beverages. And the hot babe is being ogled by a fat, ugly woman who could be Judge Ghizzy.
Buckeye Blues
IN OHIO: Conservative Curmudgeon Stu Mahlin still can’t believe Ohio Republican Governor John Kasich, who campaigned as a budget hawk and rode the Tea Party wave to victory in 2010, agreed to accept Obamacare funding to expand Ohio’s Medicaid program, breaking ranks with fellow Republican governors and the Tea Party that elected him.
Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Ohio RINO Party Boss Boob Bennett couldn’t wait to send out an e-mail praising Kasich’s Budget, but we’re still waiting for some statement on ObamaCare Cave In. Didn’t Buckeye Voters pass a constitutional amendment that prevents the state from participating in Obamacare’s insurance mandates?
- VOTER FRAUD IN CINCINNATI: The Voter Fraud That “Never Happens” is suddenly happening at the Hamilton County Board of Elections, with 19 possible cases of alleged voter fraud that occurred when Ohio was a focal point of the 2012 presidential election. A total of 19 voters and nine witnesses are part of the probe. Melowese Richardson doesn’t understand why she’s being investigated for voter fraud, even though she voted more than once for Obama. Double voting is something of a family tradition.
- REPTILE REPORT: At the Anderson GOP meeting on Wednesday evening, the angry masses passed a resolution demanding that their elected State Representative introduce legislation to allow the citizens to recall an elected official just like cities and villages, like Newtown can do.
Club members have been asking one of Kevin O’Brien’s best friends, State Rep-tile Peter Stautberg to introduce this for three years and he has refused. Of course when they first asked him, O’Brien was just a corrupt thief. Now because Stautberg has covered for O’Brien, O’Brien now has morals charges for wanking off in front of a well-born women. This could have been avoided only if Stautberg would have shown as much energy in helping the citizens out and passing their request as he did in getting special legislation passed to allow terrace Park to raise taxes on its citizens. GOP club members remember when “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman was in office. He anticipated their every wish and helped trustees make Anderson a wonderful place to live. It is no secret that Anderson has gone downhill since Stautberg and his friend Kevin O’Brien were elected. Peter Stautberg at this meeting, but he never even tried to explain himself or comment on the resolution that passed unanimously.
- UNION BLUES: The AFL-CIO plans to launch a 14-City Campaign to build support for Obama’s Amnesty Plans so that 11 million illegal immigrants can join unions and vote for DemocRATS.
- SHAMELESS SOLICITING: Ohio Second District Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup sent out an e-mail to commemorate Ronald Reagan’s 102nd Birthday, along with a request for $102 online donations.
‘Round Downtown
THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): Twenty-two years ago this week, everybody was reading how plans were on track for Cincinnati Street Railway to operate electric street cars from Longworth Hall to the Adams Landing Condominium project, and the future of street cars in downtown Cincinnati was imminent. Edition #36 (published on February 5, 1991) of the original printed edition of The Whistleblower (not the Newswire) was personally delivered to Persons of Consequence all over town, including Mayor David Mann. Word is the former mayor/ congressman put getting back into politics on his “bucket list,” and plans to start at the bottom one more time, this time as a lowly candidate for Cincinnati City Clown-cil. And let’s face it, in politics you can’t get much lowlier than that.- LOONY LIBERTARIANS: Cincinnati Mayoral Candidate Jim Berns sent Cincinnati City Clown-cil a letter requesting that they put a Charter Amendment on May ballot to end the September 10 Mayoral primary that would save over-taxed payers $400,000. Our Nine Fine Clowns would never vote for that—it makes too much sense. Do you think John Boy Cranley and Foxy Roxy will really include Berns in any of their debates?
- PUTTING THE SIN IN CINCINNATI: The Horseshoe Casino is scheduled to open in less than a month, and our local whores are wondering when they’re supposed to report for work.
- LIBRARY LOITERERS: Facts are cruel things. And nothing is crueler than the porn emporiums that are the Cincinnati Public Libraries. Researchers announced another annual downgrade in the regions ranking as a literate city because they recognize that the libraries are glorified BLOCKBUSTER stores with free rentals. Meanwhile the local school systems pump out illiterate masses that not only can’t read, but do not wish to read. The only thing they use the libraries for is to watch porn on the internet. And they do that for free for hours at your local library. Oh, once in a while they arrange drug deals on their Free over-taxed payer funded Obama Phones, but then it is back to the computer room for a session with Mr. Happy. Do over-taxed payers realize that the library tax levy goes to pay for this?
- INCLUDED ON YOUR TAX BILL: Issue 37 (passed by Hamilton County voters in 2011) increased the amount a home owner pays to support the poor. A homeowners pays $45.87 per $100,000 valuation of their homes. If Obama Care expands Medicare and requires every person have insurance in 2014, shouldn’t we repeal this levy? Why should the working stiff pay twice… once to provide insurance to the needy and then support the poor (who will have insurance coverage) at a hospital. Isn’t this a duplication of payments to the poor? John “No Left Turns in Goshen” Joseph says Hamilton County residents should take their tax money and move to Clermont County. That’ll show them!
- HAMILTON COUNTY RINOS: Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP is looking for a few good candidates to complete his ticket. All he needs now is somebody to run for Cincinnati Mayor, one of the Nine Fine Clowns on Clown-cil, and the Board of Education for the Failed Cincinnati Public Schools.
- INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALIST FEARLESS FERRETT says maybe Alex should ask that woman to run who was recently accused of having six felonies in Ohio, since she’s been active in Hamilton County RINO Party politics for several years.
- REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES have perverted the Reagan legacy with its agenda of higher taxes, runaway spending, and frequent support for DemocRATS. Their motto is: You need to tighten your belt, so the government doesn’t have to tighten theirs. They are hardly alone.
- FOOLS IN SCHOOLS: Wiffrow High School Principal, Sharon Taliban Johnson, cancelled this year’s prom due to a senior prank. Apparently Mary Money Bags Ronen didn’t explain to her that mass executions and punishment went out in the DARK AGES. Then again, it would take some effort to find the instigators and suspend them. EFFORT is not in the vocabulary at Failed Cincinnati Public Schools.
- WHISTEBLOWER GOSSIP COLUMNIST LINDA LIBEL: Life is good living off a FCPS pension. Rosa and Ken Blackwell dined at Trios on Friday night. Ken was drinking martinis and finishing off his dinner with cappuccino and paying cash. Her ass is still as wide as ever and Old Buckwheat is getting a little hefty in his girth!
- CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET says it’s been two months since I let The Blower know about the quiet and abrupt disappearance of Tonia Edwards, the 21-year Hamilton County Building Commissioner, who “retired” under the watchful eyes of the HR department while forced to clear out her office. Not a peep from any news organization, including ours. Now with the corner office chair still warm, her worthless replacement has announced his resignation. Apparently, The Blower, like the administrators of Hamilton County, don’t give two hoots as to what’s happening in the building department.
Soreheads in the Suburbs
IN ANDERSON: Wednesday night, the Anderson Township Republican Central Committee endorsed incumbent Trustee President Peggy Reis and Josh Gerth (President of the Anderson Republican Club and the Anderson Park Board) for the two trustee slots in this fall’s elections. NOT ENDORSED were Outcast Republican Greg Delev and Disgraced Current Masturbating Trustee Kevin “Big Spanky” O’Brien, running as unindicted co-conspirators totally supporting the Forrest Gump School Tax Hike, fully supported by the Anderson Agnostics at the Forest Hills Urinal.
Also in Anderson, local Tea Party Patriots sounded the alarm on Wednesday’s Forest Hills Urinal front page promotion piece for the Forrest Gump School Board’s proposed tax hike, less than a year after passing their previous tax levy, asking “When will it ever stop? Tea Partiers understand this country is now $16.5 Trillion in debt and our local politicians just want to add more debt to it.” What we need is WLW Hate Radio’s Darryl Parks to start telling people “Anybody who votes for a school levy is stupid.”
- OUR CLERMONT COUNTY CRONY says he last heard Archie Wilson had a new position with the Republican Party in Clermont County. He’s the new “Entertainment Chairman.”
DRONE ALERT: West Siders are all a’twitter at the prospect of government drones flying over their property.- IN COLERAIN: Our Colerain Caped Crusader says he was pleased to see that the dis-trust-ees aren’t going to try to reach their hands into the over-taxed payers’ pockets in May via a police levy. The Crusader is surprised that the Quacker Factor isn’t doing a victory dance and that Republicans for Higher Taxes isn’t in mourning. It’s as if both groups’ hue and cry over this levy were really just excuses to take cheap shots at Colerain Township and had nothing to do with a genuine interest in over-taxed payers’ dollars being spent wisely, as defined by the group’s perspective.
- FROM THE GREAT WHITE NORTH: NoTaxJack says there appears to be no shortage of cash laying around up here, since Forever Trustee (34 years and counting) Ed Wade, owner of the Wade insurance company downtown Springboro, voted to hand over $238,000 of over-taxed payers’ money to the City of Springboro, whose voters can also vote for the trustees. Is that a coincidence or what?
Meanwhile on the South Shore
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says only a few days after opening his campaign headquarters in Louisville, Obama’s Bitch McConnell was the first incumbent Republican to face Liberal on-air attacks when the Progressive Change Campaign Committee (PCCC) began airing TV ads attacking McConnell for his opposition to gun control measures.
Remember last month when Hollywood Liberal Ashley Judd said she was “taking a close look” at a potential run against Senate Minority Leader Obama’s Bitch McConnell in 2014.
Somebody must be taking Ashley seriously, because on Wednesday, Karl Rove’s Super PAC American Crossroads targeted the actress in a brutal attack ad.
By protecting McConnell, Karl Rove and company are finally out front with their disdain for the Conservative movement. Conservatives’ battle will be a long, hard slog against the establishment. And as Breitbart says, “We will prevail, because we actually believe in core principles and a cause greater than our egos and money.”
- IT’S OFFICIAL: Kevin “Give “em Hell” Sell is running again for Campbell County Judge-Executive in 2014, hoping for a different outcome than the time he ran against Steve Spendry in 2010.
- LEGAL UPDATE: That Cabal of NoKY Attorneys Still Out to Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters (including the Lisa Wells WLW Fan Club) wonders why when “Crazy Eric” Deters sent NoKY’s second most infamous sex-ed teacher and ex-Bun-Gal Sarah Jones to pander herself on 700WLW Hate Radio, “Crazy Eric’s” enabler Bill Cunningham didn’t warn his legal associate about going out of state without telling her probation officer. “I’m not a real lawyer,” explained the Radio Trash Talker, “I just play one on the radio.”
Meanwhile over at the Whistleblower Legal Dream, Spokesman Amicus Curiae said it also seems “Crazy Eric” doesn’t know how trust accounts and personal injury settlements are handled, either. Despite the language on his website claiming to be the BEST, “largest plaintiff/injury litigation and criminal defense focused law firm in the Cincinnati area,” Eric has now been sued for allegedly keeping money from an insurance company in a personal injury. Wouldn’t that be, you now, unethical? Or maybe even criminal? [CHECK OUT THIS CASE OF MONTGOMERY COUNTY V ERIC C DETERS]
Still Waiting for Some of Those Chinese New Year Jokes Today
FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERS: Metro Mole says Editor Carolyn Washburn e-mailed another update to subscribers explaining a whole bunch of crap nobody cares about, but nobody has yet explained why some staffers are being forced to use those “Embellished Bylines.”- MAYBE THAT’S WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Ann Richards’ “You can put lipstick and earrings on a hog and call it Monique, but it’s still a pig.”
- GOING GALT means recognizing that you do not need to justify your life or wealth to your neighbors, “society,” or politicians, or bureaucrats. They’re yours, period!
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” No. 137 says, “Tell a joke”: Q: How do you starve an Obama supporter? A: Hide his food stamps under his work boots.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (THE ODIOUS OCTOGENARIAN): This poem appears in his “Sentimental Poems of Presidential Birthdays,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
They called him “Honest Abe”
He meant just what he said.
But Washington couldn’t handle that
So they shot him in the head.
- FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about The Blower’s rather adolescent coverage of the Archie Wilson Sex for Drugs Scandal on Friday. “I know,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher admitted. “The Archie Wilson Sex for Drugs Scandal makes Judge Pat DeWhine look like ‘Husband of the Year.’ But I haven’t had quite this much fun since high school.”
- AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
Monday we’ll be celebrating the end of the First Week of Obama’s Second Term, and we’ll already be counting down the 1,440 days until his “historic” Third Term begins.
Tuesday we’ll be waiting to see if Obama’s State of Dis-Union Speech to Congress had a bigger audience than the Super Bowl.
Wednesday will be Valentine’s Day Eve, so if you’re planning to take your wife out to dinner for Valentine’s Day, do it on Monday. Restaurants won’t be as crowded, and they won’t have jacked up their prices yet,
Thursday Black History Month will be half over, and we’ll be checking all those white people’s “Guilt Index.”
And the first line of Friday’s limerick is: “This Year’s State of Disunion Address.”
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Obama Drone Strikes: When is it OK to kill Americans?
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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