Saturday, October 27, 2012

No Presidential Candidates in Town Today

• MORE FEARLESS FACT-CHECKING: Thursday’s confusion surrounding Romney’s packed-in speech at the Jet Machine factory has been solved. Yesterday you’ll recall The Fishwrap reported the event in Roselawn, but TV 5’s Lisa Cooney said it was in Bond Hill. The Whistleblower’s Freddie Factchecker actually picked up the phone and asked Jet Machine’s receptionist where they were located. TV 5 was right. Metro Mole says, “See what happens when a publication now charging extra for its on-line coverage fired all those copy editors so Skaggie Maggie and Wedgie Washburn can keep their bonuses?”

Not to worry, all of our Local Obama Supporters in the Press will have another chance to get it right on Halloween when Obama comes to town again. He plans to have all the children bring him all the candy they’ve collected so he can re-distribute it.

• OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “We are very excited to have the president of the United States on the show tonight. As you know, he only does these shows maybe once or twice a week. Actually, do you know why the president is here tonight? Do you know the real reason? To talk to NBC about canceling ‘The Apprentice.’ Experts say the entire 2012 election could come down to just eight states. The states are: confusion, dismay, depression, apathy, shock, disbelief, despair, and anxiety. Those are the eight states.”
• MORE OBAMNATIONS: RINO Colin Powell just endorsed Obama in 2012, just like he did in 2008. Don’t say what you’re thinking, or somebody will call you a racist.

When Obama voted early for himself at a photo-op in Chicago on Thursday, he showed his driver’s license as his photo ID. Isn’t that supposed to be racist? Obama also required one of the poll workers to show him how to use the touch-screen voting machine. We bet you didn’t see that on TV.

And don’t worry how Obama and Michelle will be making their mortgage payments next year when they move into that $40 million mansion in Hawaii, not as long as they keep all those e-mail addresses of dumbed-down, self-absorbed, media-influenced, celebrity-obsessed, politically-correct suckers on Obama’s campaign donations e-mail list.

• IN CLERMONT COUNTY: Over-taxed payers are asking if MILF-ord Schools ever got that money they were promised for Obama’s VP Buffoon Joe Biden’s just another Mediscare Stump Speech at MILF-ord High School cafeteria (downsized from the gym) on his sparsely attended post-convention Lies and Distortion Tour. Do you think that bill will be paid before Obama and Biden leave office on January 20, 2013?

Speaking of Biden, the father of one of the Navy SEALs killed in Benghazi says Biden asked him at the Ceremony for returning bodies, “Did your son always have balls the size of cue balls?”

Friday, Biden accused Romney of pushing a $500 Trillion tax cut.

One of Biden’s former aides has written an angry tell-all book, calling Obama’s Joke VP an “Egomaniacal Autocrat” and Obama “Financially Illiterate.” How long do you think it’ll be before Sean Hannity interviews him?

The latest report says Hillary asked for more security for Benghazi but Obama said no. No wonder the former Chief of CIA’s Bin Laden Unit now says “The DemocRATS are very good at watching Americans die.”

• IN FLORIDA: Noted Political Reporter Manatee Tadwell reports Vietnam-era veteran William Overbay said someone ignited the flags and signs supporting Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney that lined his yard. The vandals also painted a sign on his driveway reading “Obama for life.” [Orlando’s Channel 6 has the story]

Also in the Sunshine State, the Florida Sun Sentinel is sorry they endorsed Obama in 2008 and now supports Romney.

• IN CONGRESS: Discouraged DemocRATS admit they won’t take back the House and are already preparing to oust Nancy Pelosi. As DemocRAT Leader, she’s already stolen more than her share.
• UNITED NATIONS MONITORING OHIO: UN monitors are already observing Ohio elections to combat all that “voter suppression” Liberals claim, like why there are no Section 8 residents voting in Hamilton County’s Indian Hill Precincts.
• ALSO IN OHIO: With only “9” more days until the Presidential Elections, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Jeep is considering moving its manufacturing facilities to China. Now you know why Obama wanted all those auto workers in Toledo to vote early.
• ANOTHER DEBATE: Thursday’s Mandell-Brown U.S. Senate Debate at WCET was a real donnybrook. Outside, Union Goons outnumbered Tea Partiers in the shouting match, and indoors Disingenuous DemocRAT Sherrod sounded like he was debating Grover Norquist, the founder and president of Americans for Tax Reform, whining about Mandell’s unheard of idea of going to Washington to lower taxes. NBC Senior White House Correspondent Chuck Todd was the moderator, so you can imagine how impartial all that was. Maybe “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup should’ve been there, since he’s the only Republican hereabouts who hasn’t signed the Americans for Tax Reform’s “No New Taxes” Pledge.
• NO “FOUR MORE YEARS”: Just how bad an idea is 4-year terms for Cincinnati City Clown-cil? Republican Amy Murray and DemocRAT Charlie Luken actually made an advertisement against it. [CHECK IT OUT]
• HURLEY THE HISTORIAN SAYS on this date in 1904, the New York Subway opened and it only cost a nickel-per-ride, just like Mallory’s Trolley Folly Fans promise.
• CRIME AND SHAME IN THE CINCINNATI FIRE DEPARTMENT:When current Cincinnati fire chief Richard Braun was sworn in on January 18, 2011 at fire station 51 in College Hill, part of his oath of office was to “impartially administer” his duties. In his speech afterwards, he spoke of the importance of “integrity” and “professionalism.”

So what happened to those sworn words in Braun’s administering of the case of the cheating fire fighter Edwyna Lyttle, accurately known as “Do-Little”?

The hearing officer in Lyttle’s latest disciplinary hearing recommended she be fired, but Braun is just sitting on that recommendation.

• POTTY-MOUTH POLITICS: Yesterday, Obama raised a few eyebrows after he told a Rolling Stone reporter that Romney was a “Bullshitter.”

Meanwhile, Photo-Shop Editorial Spoofer Edward Cropper really been busy lately, like this one of Obama as a “Bullsitter.” [Check out his web page today.]

And what exactly was it that Lame Duck Hamilton County Sheriff Si Leis called the DemocRAT running against his hand-picked successor at last weekend’s big retirement party for several members of the Sheriff’s department—a piece of what?

• FRIVOLOUS LAWSUIT UPDATE: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says there’s a big lunch celebration scheduled today for the Cabal of Northern Kentucky attorneys out to destroy “Crazy Eric” Deters” on the one-year anniversary of the historic settlement of Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters’ frivolous lawsuit against The Whistleblower. The Blower even published a “special edition” last year on the last Saturday in October.

Some of the more recent additions to our Persons of Consequence might not recall seeing it, since The Blower doesn’t usually spend a lot of time gloating about our victories, but we could show you that special edition here. (LINK TO SPECIAL EDITION)

• FINALLY, AT YESTERDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about HBO actress Lena Dunham’s Obama commercial that compares a young girl’s losing her virginity to the first time voting for Obama. You can’t get more tasteless than that.

That’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Lena Dunham’s “If you’re going to have sex – er, vote – for the first time, you should really do it with President Barack Obama.”

Former Pant-Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton said it was the greatest political ad he’d ever seen, except that it might’ve included blow jobs.

Local “Sluts for Obama” Laure “Not so” Cleanlivin and Denise Dreihaus also agree.

REMEMBER: If you can’t improve on the news, you shouldn’t even be reporting it.

HALLOWEEN YARD DISPLAY HOT LINE

E-mail your cell phone photos today.

Some frightening items items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally frightening subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.

LINK OF THE DAY

If Obama wins re-election, “American Decline” warns there will be “world chaos” and religion will be “on the run”

Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

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