Daily Archives: September 16, 2012

Special “The Week That Was” E-dition

Sunday, September 16, 2012

The Blower’s Week in Review

  • OUR NUMBER ONE FOREIGN POLICY FAILURE STORY THIS WEEK was when Conservative Columnist Mark Steyn wrote about this week’s total failure of Obama’s Foreign Policy, asking if our Star Spangled Banner was still waving: Actually, no. Instead, the black flag of al Qa’eda flies over the US Embassy in Tunis. But don’t worry, when your President’s so cool he’s doing gigs in Vegas, what happens in Tunis stays in Tunis.

As a Canadian, I’m interested to see that America has belatedly adopted the divided responsibilities of the Westminster system. Proceeding from the Pimp with the Limp show to Letterman to Beyoncé and back again, Barack Obama makes a perfectly adequate (if somewhat cheesy and downmarket) ceremonial queen. But who’s he appointed as Prime Minister to do the tedious business of running the government (and attending those boring national security meetings.

  • OUR NUMBER TWO FOREIGN POLICY FAILURE STORY THIS WEEK according to News Spoofer Edward Cropper was when Obama’s White House Press Dweeb Jay Cardboard tried to tell reporters all those burning embassies and protests around the world were directed at an “Offensive Movie” nobody had ever seen, not at the United States.

  • AND OUR NUMBER THREE FOREIGN POLICY FAILURE STORY THIS WEEK was when Hillary just couldn’t stop apologizing for that YouTube video nobody ever saw that was supposedly the cause of all that Anti-American death and destruction in the Middle East this week. We plan to show it to you now, so you can judge for yourselves, but we ask you to fight your instincts to riot, burn cars, murder fellow humans, and otherwise make a fool out of yourself after you watch it.
  • MONDAY in our Annual “ Remembering September ” E-dition, The Blower said it was just like Groundhog’s Day for the DemocRATS!:

Hurley the Historian says on this date in 2001, Americans had not yet been attacked by Murdering Muslim terrorists on their own soil, and Obama, his Dysfunctional DemocRATs, and all those Kneepad Liberals in the Press still believe things have never changed, except that last year, U.S. counterterrorism officials were chasing a credible but unconfirmed al-Qaida threat to use a car bomb on bridges or tunnels in New York City or Washington for the occasion’s tenth anniversary.

A lot of people (including many of Obama’s advisors) still don’t even believe we’ve ever been in a War on Terror. They believe in negotiations, appeasement, and letting corrupt, bungling bureaucRATS at the United Nations protect us. These people are either just plain stupid or still in denial, or worse yet, they’re lying liberals just continuing to bash Bush and try to fool all those dumbed-down, self-absorbed, media-influenced, celebrity-obsessed, politically-correct uninformed voters one more time, since there were then only “56” days until the 2012 Elections.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • TUESDAY in our Special “Fact-Check Challenge” E-dition, The Blower said down at The Fishwrap, they ask “What’s a Fact Check?” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:

We really did our best to cover Obama’s joke Vice President Joe Biden during his just another Mediscare Stump Speech at MILF-ord High School cafeteria (downsized from the gym) on his sparsely attended post-convention Lies and Distortion Tour. —Obama Supporters in the Press

Unfortunately, the most newsworthy part of Joe Biden’s campaign swing through southwestern Ohio was when he was photographed whispering lewd suggestions to an antique biker chick sitting on his lap with two biker bums looking on at Cruisers Diner in Seaman, Ohio. —Photo Spoofer Edward Cropper

When Joe Biden dared the news media to check his facts, we told him not to worry about The Fishwrap. —Clermont County Demo-Labor Party Boss Dave Lane

Is that like during the 1988 DemocRAT Presidential Primary when Gary Hart told the media to “Catch me if you can?” —Your Quote for Today Committee

Do you think the three Republican Miami Township Trustees would be proud to know we all requested and got a photo with Joe Biden while we were being paid double time by local over-taxed payers for working on a Sunday? —Miami Township Police Department Employees

Sharon Coolidge (D., Fishwrap) was more than willing to publish our bogus “735” attendance figure. —The Miami Township Fire Department

Is that why The Blower says those Feckless Fishwrappers are too lazy, too stupid, or too dishonest ever to report the truth? —Freddie Factchecker

[READ MORE HERE]

  • WEDNESDAY in our Special “Not Campaigning on 9/11” E-dition, The Blower asked, “How can you tell when Obama’s Campaigning? His lips are moving!”:

Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says today there may only be “54” more days until the Presidential Elections, but yesterday was sort of a day off from the 2012 Presidential Campaign, with the appearance of a time out to commemorate that fateful day eleven years ago today when those murdering Muslim terrorists attacked America on 9/11.

Obama took an early day off from campaigning on Saturday when he devoted his weekly address to 9/11.

Obama and Michelle gathered Tuesday morning on the White House lawn for a non-campaigning moment of silence photo op. Afterwards, they attended a non-campaigning televised memorial at the Pentagon. In the afternoon, Obama showed up at a non-campaigning photo op with wounded military service members and their families at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center.

Obama’s Vice President Joe Biden was in Somerset County, Pa., for a non-campaigning service remembering the victims of Flight 93. In New York, Obama’s Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano was not campaigning at the World Trade Center Memorial.

On behalf of the Obama campaign, Disgraced Former Pants Dropper in Chief Bill Clinton was set not to campaign when he spoke at an evening rally at Florida International University in Miami.

White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard said all of this was “official government business,” and over-taxed payers should be proud to be paying for all of it, to which Obama Supporters in the Press, totally agreed, when they weren’t busy blaming George W. Bush for the 9/11 attacks in the first place, or like at NBC’s “Today” show, skipping their 9/11 Moment Of Silence for a Kardashian interview.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • THURSDAY, in our Special “Mideast Meltdown” E-dition, The Blower wonder how soon we could schedule that foreign policy debate:

Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says the last few days have been typical of the “historic” Obama Administration. The country continues to go to hell in a hand-basket, while Obama just keeps on fund-raising and campaigning for re-election. Let’s just take some of Obama’s Foreign Policy Triumphs, for example:

According to Reuters, the U.S. Ambassador to Libya Christopher Stevens and three embassy staff members were murdered as they rushed away from a consulate building in Benghazi, stormed by al Qaeda-linked gunmen blaming America for a film that they said insulted the Prophet Mohammad. Murdering Muslims then dragged the dead body of US Ambassador through the streets. How could this happen in a country Obama helped liberate, leading from behind?

After the US Embassy in Cairo was attacked and overrun by Marauding Muslims, tearing down the American flag and putting up the Al Qaeda flag instead, Hillary’s State Department issued its customary apology for Free Speech in the United States. Later the White House was forced to apologize for its own Cairo embassy’s apology for anti-Muslim activity back home. It looked just like Iran in 1979 during the Carter Administration, but in those days, they didn’t murder our people, they only held them hostage until Reagan replaced the “Peanut Farmer.”

[READ MORE HERE]

  •  FRIDAY in our Special “Flaming Embassies” E-dition, The Blower said, “Hurting Muslims Feelings Will Not Be Tolerated”:

Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says these days Obama’s so-called foreign policy expertise advantage is going up in smoke faster than another US Embassy in the Middle East. Ever since his convention recessed, instead of strong executive leadership, we are seeing a world and a country in chaos while the president campaigns, just like every day since his “historic” inauguration. Do you think the murder of an American Ambassador will dent Obama’s lead over Romney on security policy?

Obama got His “3 AM Call” and decided to sleep right through it. According to the White House calendar, there is no public record of President Barack Obama attending his daily intelligence briefing–known as the Presidential Daily Brief (PDB)–in the week leading up to the attacks on the US embassy in Cairo and the murder of U.S. Libyan Ambassador Chris Stevens and three American members of his staff. Besides, who could have anticipated any attacks on Americans by Murdering Muslim Terrorists on September 11? And by the way, Obama wants to make it perfectly clear that his Administration will not tolerate any rush to judgment that the attacks on two or three American Embassies on September 11 were in any way long-planned coordinated terrorists attacks. It probably could’ve been a coincidence.

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Obama’s “Our country is stronger, safer and more respected in the world” from his weekly address just last Saturday.

[READ MORE HERE]

  • SATURDAY in our Special “Foreign Policy Failures ” E-dition, The Blower said, “We really didn’t need all of those embassies anyhow!”:

Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says in case you were looking at the front page of Friday’s Fishwrap, you probably didn’t notice how Obama’s Foreign Policy Failures are setting the world on fire, because while our “Nerobama” has been busy campaigning and fundraising, our US Embassies in the Middle East are burning. Maybe Obama should’ve stayed in D.C. to deal with his Foreign Policy Crisis Failures and send Bill Clinton to Las Vegas instead.

Also, America was warned of an imminent embassy attack in Libya, but did nothing and Murdering Muslims killed U.S. Libyan Ambassador Chris Stevens and three American members of his staff. Hillary’s State Dept had credible information 48 hours before it happened. Sensitive documents are now missing. Names of 400+ Libyans who are working with Americans have now been exposed. Egyptian intelligence was warned on September 4 of possible attacks and passed that information on to US authorities. Reuters reports protesters scaling walls of the US Embassy compound in Tunis, breaking windows and setting fires. A black Al-Qaeda flag now flies over that embassy. Meanwhile, the Dissociated Press reports a Marine team being sent to help secure US Embassy in Yemen. We hope they’re allowed to take their bullets with them.

But maybe The Blower was wrong. Perhaps the most important news of the day was not the attacks on our embassies in Egypt and Libya, or the death of Ambassador Christopher Stevens. Neither was it Obama’s wussie response or that of Hillary’s dysfunctional State Department. The nation needed another liberal media generated political controversy to change our focus to Mitt Romney’s politicizing the attacks by daring to appear presidential and questioning the current administration and its reaction and response to the attacks.

[READ MORE HERE]

THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL

Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.

SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE

e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today. 

  • PRESIDENTIAL POLITICS 2012: This weekend, the Obama Re-election campaign continues to claim elevating the image of the United States around the world was one of Obama’s proudest foreign policy accomplishments. Meanwhile, Republicans should be showing you that Obama praising the Arab Spring during his 20122 UN Speech and that Flashback of Obama promising, “The Day I’m Inaugurated Muslim Hostility Will Ease.”
  • OHIO RINO PARTY: Party Boss Boob Bennett says, now is the time to request your absentee ballot for this year’s election. Ohio Secretary of State Jon Husted’s office recently mailed out request forms for a vote-by-mail ballot. Please return that card or use our online form here to get started today.
  • THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says the presidential race definitely had its ups and downs this past week. At the start of the week, Obama coming off a successful national convention had bounced ahead of his Republican challenger Mitt Romney. By week’s end, the bounce was gone, and the race looked like the conventions had never happened in the daily Presidential Tracking Poll.
  • OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Fallon’s, “Yesterday in Nevada, President Obama said he’ll win the election if the turnout is anything like it was in 2008. While voters said he’d win if he were anything like he was in 2008.”
  • HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this day in 1940, Congress imposed the draft and Selective Service was born, but it wasn’t till the Vietnam War that WLW Hate Radio Trash Talker Bill Cunningham skedaddled to Saskatchewan.
  • OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE: chose George S. Patton’s “If you can’t get them to salute when they should salute and wear the clothes you tell them to wear, how are you going to get them to die for their country?”
  • VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: A Maryland DemocRAT candidate quit her congressional race Monday after her own party told state officials that she had committed fraud by voting in both Maryland and Florida in recent elections.
  • THUGS ‘R US: On Thursday, Teamsters President James P. Hoffa compared the Republican Party to genocidal Cambodian leader Pol Pot and likened the Tea Party to the John Birch Society.
  • MEDIA MENDACITY: That attack in Libya was almost as well-coordinated as when Obama Supporters in the Press ganged up on Mitt Romney Wednesday when they tried to turn Obama’s foreign policy bungle into a Romney gaffe for daring to appear presidential and criticizing Obama’s weak response after the “historic” coordinated murder of our Libyan Ambassador on 9/11. Too bad somebody left his microphone open and everybody heard them coordinating their questions. Maybe it was that NPR correspondent who refuses to stand during the National Anthem or say the Pledge of Allegiance.
  • LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #261 is to say to a Liberal, “You remember the Reagan era, when Ronald Reagan was President, and Bob Hope and Johnny Cash were still with us? Well, now we have Obama, no hope, and no cash.”
  • DERANGED DEMOCRATS: DemocRAT Congressman Brad Sherman is calling for allowing 12 Million Illegal Immigrants to unionize. What could possibly be wrong with that idea?
  • REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES: Inspired by the “Sluts for Obama” button that Laure Quinlivan was spotted wearing at the DemocRAT National Convention, Republicans for Higher Taxes confessed that they too are sluts and applauded Quinlivan for her brave admission. Sluts for Obama are people who feel the government should stay out of people’s sex lives, except when they want the government to pay for their sex lives.
  • MORE FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERY: After Sharon Coolidge (D., Fishwrap) publish that bogus “735” attendance figure for Obama’s joke Vice President Joe Biden’s just another Mediscare Stump Speech at the MILF-ord High School cafeteria (downsized from the gym) on his sparsely attended post-convention Lies and Distortion Tour, Freddie Factchecker wondered if that’s why The Blower always says those Feckless Fishwrappers are too lazy, too stupid, or too dishonest ever to report the truth.
  • RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: A pastor in Indiana has put up a sign that uses a historical image of the 1930 lynching of two black teenagers in an effort to recharge the black vote. The message is “Register to vote or white people will lynch you.”
  • LOCAL MUSLIMS CONDEMN ATTACKS: A few local Muslims and others gathered on a street corner in Clifton Friday to show Cincinnatians how they feel about this week’s killings of four Americans in an attack on the U.S. Consulate in Libya.

  • SPOILED SPORTS OF ALL SORTS: Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall says the Reds’ magic number may be down to “7” after Friday’s game, but that number would be it even lower if Aroldis Chapman hadn’t blow that save last week.
  • THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower): Cincinnati Police Chief Impersonator James Craig still hasn’t taken his Police Chief Test. We didn’t want you to think we forgot about it.
  • CLERMONT CRONIES: Remember all those times “Mean Jean” Schmidt used to wait all day just to get Obama’s autograph at the State of the Union Address? Amazingly, these days people actually wait in line to get her successor “Bronze Star Brad’s” signature. How bad are things for Her Meanness? This year, she didn’t even make that list of the most corrupt members of Congress. And did organizers of this week’s big Ryan Victory Rally really ensure that State Rep-tile Danny Bubp-kiss-ass had no role whatsoever in the big event, even though that event was in his own district? What’s going on there?
  • IN ANDERSON: Disgraced Anderson Trustee Kevin’s O’Brien’s long-awaited public indecency trial is now set for November 27 in Hamilton County Municipal Court. Now that prosecutrix Gwen Bender says she no longer needs that recording of Whacky Jackie’s Illegitimate Son Kevin bragging about his masturbatory exploits to a “non-police person,” The Blower would be only to happy to broadcast it.
  • TEA PARTY VALUES: When Obama finally shows for Monday’s crappy campaign rally in Eden Park, will any of our Tea Party Patriots also be there to greet him?
  • NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES: This is Presidential Convention Season is finally over, and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.

Homeland Security
Has become a farce.
Obama told Arizona, “Stick it up your arse.”
He’s put us deep in debt.

Holder is stonewalling
Obama says, “That’s swell.”
Who sold guns to the Mexicans?
The Dems will never tell.

  • THIS WEEK IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says Senate Republican Leader Bitch McConnell is really sucking up to the Tea Party Patriots these days. McConnell just hired Jesse Benton — the tea party political guy who ran Texas Congressman Ron Paul’s losing presidential primary race — to oversee his campaign that’s still two years away. And the five-term senator still doesn’t have an opponent. What’s up with that?
  • THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why Obama is so worried about hurting the feelings of all those Murdering Muslims in the Middle East. “It sounds really stupid to me,” Kane explained, “especially when Obama just can’t stop bragging about killing their Muslim hero Osama bin Laden. Maybe that’s why all those Muslim Rioters can’t stop screaming ‘We’re all Osama!’”
  • AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”: The Blower’s Campaign Countdowns to will continue. Speaking of which, the 2012 Elections are only “50” days away.

Monday we’ll be celebrating the Jewish New Year.

Tuesday we’ll be trying to figure out who’s bright idea it was to schedule Obama’s grassroots rally at Seasongood Pavilion in Eden Park.

Wednesday we’ll be counting how many of Obama’s Embassies in the Middle East are still standing.

Thursday we’ll be explaining why we don’t care if we hurt somebody’s feelings.

And the first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “It’s time once again for Oktoberfest”

WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE

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Some political scorekeeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political scorekeeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.

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American Crossroads: Skips

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