One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Explaining Today’s Hype Shortage

Whistleblower Political Prognosticator Nostradamus Tadwell says we all should’ve listened to him, because with only “130” more days until the 2012 Presidential Elections, today’s acute shortage of available hype will probably make it impossible for the American news media to function properly.

The crisis was caused when GOP House Speaker John Boehner forgot to check with his scheduler and arranged two separate historic votes to bring Contempt of Congress charges against Obama’s Arrogant Attorney General Eric Holder, on the same day Vampire Killers on the Supreme Court were planning to drive a stake through the heart of Obama’s Health Care Legacy.

So now there won’t be enough hype left for any of the other stories everybody should be covering.

The Never-Ending, Historic Obama Campaign calls Mitt Romney “Outsourcer-in-Chief,” at the same time the Obama campaign has used a travel booking company all year long that has operations in India and China. Surely, there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
As the list of DemocRATS skipping Obama’s DemocRAT National Convention in Charlotte continues to grow, the man responsible for getting DemocRATS elected says he’s telling candidates to stay away, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says 58% think the Federal Government encourages illegal immigration, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Our Compassionate Conservative says Good DemocRAT Rodney King blew his $3.8 million and now his family is asking for donations to cover Rodney’s $22,000 funeral, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says a bill that will reduce barriers to employment and education for felons when they leave prison was among the 13 pieces of legislation GOP Ohio Governor John Kasich signed on Tuesday, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
The Anderson Tea Party says we need to remind Governor Kasich of his campaign rhetoric about making Ohio a low-tax and pro growth environment, and ask him NOT to quadruple the severance tax covering all that fracking oil and gas, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Romney VP Wannabe Rob “Fighting for Freedom Centers” Portman says he wishes other Tea Party Patriots would stop reminding him to sign the letter to Harry Reid opposing the Law of the Sea Treaty, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Cincinnati’s Extreme Liberal Clown-cil is preparing to leave a hell of a fiscal mess as members head off on their summer recess, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that, hell, there won’t even be a wedding chapel roof over City Hall that Dough Boy Honey says we can’t live without.
Our City Hall Snitch wants to know if FOP President Kathy Harrell was the only union president for City of Cincinnati employees Mayor Mark Mallory called to tell about layoffs, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
The Dayton regional housing authority agreed to pay its former and Cincinnati’s new housing authority chief Gregory Johnson at least $53,333 to leave, after Johnson resigned for no stated reason under a cloud of controversy, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Revered former police chief Tom Strike-her and Whistleblower Legal Dream Team chairman and ACLU mouthpiece Scott Greenwood were seen jawboning during their long lunch Tuesday at the Mt. Adams Bar & Grill, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
“Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s Congressional Campaign Web Page still needs a lot of work, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Both political parties in Hamilton County are still looking for candidates to run for County Commissioner, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Republicans for Higher Taxes named Chairman Alex TryinToFoolYou their GOP Leader of the Week for openly spending Saturday morning at Findlay Market, after sending four e-mails during the week begging Republicans to show up for Saturday’s door-to-door campaigning, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
And when Republicans for Higher Taxes also congratulated Alex and Jennifer Triantafilou on their re-marriage, and asked if was really true Alex T. can now claim his share of the $50,000/year loot from the Green Township government job he arranged for Jennifer to get even though she was completely unqualified for it, there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
The Hamilton County RINO Party provided pizza and soda for volunteers phone-banking for Mitt Romney Wednesday night at the Chabot Victory Center on Montana Avenue, but there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
In Anderson, WLW Radio Trash Talker Darryl Parks is telling Facebook followers “I told you so” after the Forrest Gump School got a new levy passed and started hiring new administrators but no word about new teachers so far, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Whistleblower Gossip Columnist Linda Libel is still waiting to hear if the Hamilton County Prosecutor’s Office has released the police report on our weenie wagging Hamilton County elected official whose name you would most certainly know, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1969, a police raid of the Stonewall Inn (a gay club located on New York City’s Christopher Street) turned violent as patrons and local sympathizers begin rioting against the police, and that’s where “Stonewall” got its name, and Whistleblower Alternate Life-Styles Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis report folks working on floats for this weekend’s Gay Pride Parade in Cincinnati say and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says folks at Kentucky Speedway guaranteed there will be no more traffic and parking problems at the big Quaker State 400 race on Saturday, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
The Cabal still out to destroy “Crazy Eric” Deters says there’s a lot of evidence out there showing Crazy Eric learned nothing from his Bluegrass Bar Association suspension, and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Our Quote for Today Committee chose Joseph Goebbels’ “If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it,” and there won’t be enough hype to cover that.
Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about today’s shortage of hype and he said it’s because of all that excessive publicity being used for Eric Holder’s Contempt Citation and the Supreme Court’s long-awaited Obamacare ruling.

“The mainstream media has to start thinking outside the box,” Kane explained. “I’m sure they could find a way to report some of the news they seem to lose, if they’d only try.”

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Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our June fund-raising drive from Hype ‘R Us, offering double your hype back if you’re not completely satisfied.

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Some over-hyped items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally over-hyping subscribers.

News Hype Link of the Day

Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

Whistleblower Newswire

Some of the News They Seem to Lose

Special “News Hype Overload” E-dition