Saturday, June 2, 2012
Five More Months! Five More Months!
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus Obama reverted to type on Thursday when he insulted former President Bush at the unveiling of the 43rd president’s official White House Portrait. White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard said “Aborting a baby because she’s a girl is part of a woman’s right to murder her unborn child. Obama’s economy added just 69,000 new jobs in May, while the his bogus unemployment rate even climbed to 8.2%, and if you believe Obama’s rosy-all-is-great with his economic stewardship of the country’s financial picture, the stock market took a real dive which shows what the real financial picture is. So Friday, Obama hopped on Air Force One and jetted off at over-taxed payers’ expense to attend six fundraisers, a possible sign of budding desperation for a campaign that is lagging far behind its initial fundraising expectations.
Meanwhile, Team Romney went guerilla from coast-to-coast with an effective counter demonstration to embarrass Obama Attack Dog David Axelrod in Boston, and in California, Mitt Romney kidnapped reporters for a surprise visit to Obama’s bankrupt solar energy company Solyndra, even producing a web ad entitled “Symbol of Failure,” designed to highlight Obama’s crony capitalism, for that failed business that cost America’s over-taxed payers $500 million.- Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says the Obama campaign’s early attempts to attack Mitt Romney’s record at Bain Capital or present him as too extreme to be president have not worked out all that well so far. The early stumbles have created a flurry of commentaries wondering what’s wrong with Obama’s team that performed so flawlessly in Election 2008.
- Maybe it’s because Romney’s rapid response has been both aggressive and combative, totally unlike McCain in 2008. Meanwhile in Congress, GOP House Speaker John Boehner still seems to be holding firm on his “No-Tax Hike Pledge.” And with only “156” more days until November’s Elections, The Blower says it’s about time a Republicans grew a pair.
Thursday night was some sort of Mickey Mouse Fundraising Deadline, and the Obsessive Obama Supporters Tom and Rose say Obama re-election campaigners at the White House were spam-gramming the bejesus out of their local e-mail list with e-mails supposedly from Obama, Michelle, Joe Biden, Bill Clinton, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Campaign Manager Jim Messina, all groveling for donations before midnight. The one from Juliana Smoot (whoever the hell she is) even offered a free Obama 2012 car magnet for a $10 donation.
Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1980, left-wing lunatics found a new way to spew their Liberal lies when CNN began broadcasting. But at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane reminded Political Insiders that June 1 was also the 16th anniversary of the Hamilton County Stadium tax, and Friday’s door prize for the anti-taxers in the audience was a “Bob Bungalhaus” Punching Bag.
“Is there anything as permanent as a temporary tax?” Kane asked.
Bluegrass Belligerence
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says he’s sure the local news media will not be covering the big Confederate Memorial Day Parade in his city today. Confederate Memorial Day, as all Blower readers know, is officially celebrated in Kentucky on June 3, because Confederate President Jefferson Davis was born on that date in 1808 in Fairview, Kentucky. For those of you who don’t know where Fairview is, it’s near Hopkinsville, wherever in the hell that is.- Our Good Friend Bobby Leach says he learned at a Memorial Day parade how hookers came to be in Northern Kentucky. According to noted historian Mumford Tadwell, the term “hooker” owes its origin to former Campbell County politician Ezekial Hooker, a handsome figure of a man who, during Civil War days, spent so much time in the red-light district of Newport that the area became known as “Hooker’s District.”
It followed, then, that the ladies who earned their living in the bawdy houses of the district were called “hookers.”
No wonder Phyllis on Madison wonders why they don’t have a ceremony to honor Civil War heroes like General Hooker at the Piece Bell in Newport. Maybe they could get Jerry Springer to say a few words, that’s if he’s back in town, and remembers to bring his checkbook.
That’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Howard Dean’s “I still want to be the candidate for guys with Confederate flags on their pickup trucks. We can’t beat George Bush unless we appeal to a broad cross-section of DemocRATS.” Yeah, right! Bluegrass Republicans really went for Obama in a big way.- Congressman Goof Doofus wonders if he’d get more votes if he told people he was Jefferson Davis’ great, great grandson?
- Our Vanilla Hills Vigilante says their scheduled Civil War reenactment would probably be more realistic this weekend of they used real bullets.
- Meanwhile on Channel 19 News, Trish the Dish just figured out why Confederate Memorial Day isn’t celebrated as a National Holiday. Trish says, “It’s because the South lost, right?”
This is the Official “Confederate Memorial Day in Kentucky” E-dition. Any other Confederate Memorial Day in Kentucky edition you might see is surely a fake!
More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans
Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our June fund-raising drive by Great, Great Grandsons of the Confederacy, for helping keep their dreams alive.
CONFEDERATE MEMORIAL DAY HOT LINE
Some Confederate-loving items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Confederate-loving Whistleblower Subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Rebel Links of the Day
The Confederate Soldier Song
PLUS
Tribute to the Confederate Fallen (Wearing of the Gray)
Black People Enjoy Celebrating Confederate Memorial Day Too
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
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