Special “D-Word Update” E-dition

One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Brought to You By The Letter “D”

  • Yesterday in our “Devolving Democracy” Edition, we said it was just like “Dumbing Down.” A few days earlier, we said Obama’s Billion Dollar Re-Election Plan was to “Divide, Distract, and Deceive.” Maybe that’s why whenever The Blower uses the word “DemocRAT,” it’s usually preceded by another “D-Word,” for alliteration (a literary effect achieved by consecutive words that begin with the same consonant, in case all you FCPS graduates wre absent that day).  

And today, with the 2012 Presidential Elections only “172” days away, here are a few other D-words that come to mind when the Official Voice of the Conservative Agenda thinks about Obama and the DemocRATS. Look them up in your Funken Wagnalls if you don’t know what they mean:

Dishonest, dildo, dalliance, dastardly, dazed, debacle, debased, debauchery, decadent, defective, defensive, deficient, defect, deflect, deflower, deformed, defraud, degenerate, degrade, deign, delete, deleterious, derelict, delinquent, demagogue, demean, demented, demerit, demolish, demonic, demoralize, demote, demount, denounce, depend, deplete, deplorable, depose, depraved, depressing, deprive, derail, deride, derogatory, descent, desecrate, desert, desecrate, desensitize, desire, desperate, despicable, deteriorate, detest, detract, devalue, devastate, deviate, devoid, devour, diabolic, diaphragm, diatribe, dictate, diddle, digress, dilatory, dim, diminish, dimwitted, dire, dirty, dis, disappointment, disapproval, disarray, disaster, disbar, disbelieve, disclaim, disclose, discombobulate, discomfort, discommend, discompose, disconnect, disconsolate, discord, discourage, discourteous, discrepancy, discreditable, disease, disenchant, disestablish, dysfunction, disgrace, disgruntle, disguise, disgust, dishonest, disillusion, disingenuous, disloyal, dismal, dismay, disorderly, disorganized, disparity, displace, dispute, disquiet, disrepair, disrespect, disrepute, disrobe, disrupt, dissatisfactory, disseminate, dissent, disservice, dissident, distain, distasteful, distress, distort, disturbed, disunite, dither, divert, divisive, document, dodge, doleful, DNA, donation, double-dealing, double-crossing, double-faced, doubt, douche, downcast, downfall, downgrade, downhill, dredge, dreg, dress, dribble, drool, dumb-ass, duplicity, duress, and, of course, dickhead.

Obviously, this isn’t a complete list. If you think of any we’ve missed, please let us know.

  • And are Bill and Hillary finally splitting? The Globe says she moving in with another woman, and Bill says, “If this is going to cost me alimony, will I at least get to watch?”
  • In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says when Joe Biden returned to Ohio yesterday, did Ohio RINO Party Boss Boob Bennett ask him why over-taxed payers were forced to cough up $299 million to Johnson Controls under a failed stimulus program which resulted in a factory operated at half-capacity, outsourced jobs to Hungary, and a workplace environment that exposed its Ohio workers to lead poisoning?” 
  • Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1973, the US Senate began the Watergate Hearings. We’re sure our Kneepad Liberals in the Press will mention that.
  • Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen reports 71% say government should let big troubled financial institutions like JPMorgan Chase Bank fail, even if Obama has a $1 million personal petty cash account on deposit.
  • In Congress, GOP House Speaker John Boehner warned another battle over raising the Dreaded Debt Ceiling is coming later this year, blah, blah, blah. And he won’t permit another increase without a larger amount of spending cuts and reforms, yada, yada, yada. Is anybody betting Republicans won’t cave again?
  • Meanwhile, “Junketing Jean” Schmidt’s News Flack Barrett Brunsman says according to the Washington Post, his boss and her henpecked husband Peter will be on the House Foreign Affairs Committee’s jovial jaunt to Taiwan and South Korea next week. Are the Clermont Cronies keeping score about how many of these over-taxed payer funded trips the Schmidt family be taking before January 3? Did it ever occur to any of those Cronies that this undisguised theft of over-taxed payers’ funds might have a negative effect upon all Republicans, including “Junketing Jean’s” replacement?
  • At the same time, Saturday is Armed Forces Day, and veterans are wondering what special events the party hack that Hamilton County RINO Party Boss Alex T. hand-picked to manage “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s campaign has scheduled for his candidate. At least he could advise if any restaurants are offering freebies to veterans and military folks during Armed Forces Week.
  • Following up on that Fishwrap exclusive about the need for an expensive new crime lab in Cincinnati, John Doe at the Coroner’s Office says a secret meeting was recently held between $tan Che$ley and current (also running for election) Hamilton County Coroner Dr. Lakshmi Kode Sammarco.  The purpose of the meeting was for $tan to lobby Dr. Sammarco to place the new crime lab at the University of Cincinnati.  $tan is a current member of the Board of Trustees of UC with his term expiring in 2018. $tan promised grant money from the State of Ohio for partial funding if the new lab is placed at UC. It is unknown what, if any “support” promises were made to Dr. Sammarco in her upcoming first election, or what’s in it for $tan.
  • Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they write. In Tuesday’s Fishwrap, the headline trumpeted the request for a mere $10 million to be paid by Cincinnati’s over-taxed payers to that group of self-appointed do-gooders who want City Clown-cil to sell Music Hall to them for only $1 and arrange for $96 million in tax credits. Included in the $10 million immediate request so that the group of deranged do-gooders can immediately attract donations from rich, doddering old ladies, was the need for additional soundproofing to the Music Hall remodeling job because all of that noise expected to be coming from Mayor Mallory’s Trolley Folly on Elm Street. 
  • Why the Government is broke and why people shouldn’t tell all on Facebook. A 40 year nutcase friend was diagnosed with MCTD (whatever the hell that is) when she lived in Wisconsin. She is on permanent disability and moved to Oregon last year to be with a guy she met online. On her FaceBook page she -bragged she was flying from Seattle back to Wisconsin for her yearly doctor’s appointment and that MEDICAID was picked up her 10-day-in-advance $2,000 ticket! She also blabbered that she has a passport and thinks she need to get out and travel. Mind you she spends her time fly fishing while we work to pay for this crap.
  • Our Suburban Sorehead says he’s noticed that when violent crime happens in the suburbs, the local paper and TV stations put the location in the headline, use the suburb name as a dateline, and mention the town’s name several times in the article.  When violent crime happens inside the City of Cincinnati, it’s only in the “Tri-State.” What possible motivation could the local lying liberals who run the TV and newspapers in this town have to create the illusion that the City of Cincinnati (AKA Detroit South) is safe and the suburbs are high-crime? [NOW WATCH THIS]

Bluegrass Battles

  • In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says the all over the county our Tea Party Patriots have really been feeling their oats these days. Besides driving Liberal Pundits crazy on TV, they’ve been winning some important elections. In Indiana, Tea Partiers opened a can of Whoop Ass on RINO Senator Richard Lugar. Tuesday night in Nebraska, Sarah Palin-endorsed State Senator Deb Fischer beat establishment Republican for the U.S. Senate race. And in only five more days, we’ll see if history repeats in Kentucky and Thomas Massie, endorsed by Tea Party Senator Rand Paul bests our establishment endorsed Trooper Babe.
  • The Massie campaign will be hosting a booth for Thomas Massie at this weekend’s MaiFest at Covington’s MainStrasse Village. They’ll have plenty of literature and yard signs, and Ron Paul “I Could’ve Been a Contender” T-shirts will be available for a small donation. Thomas Massie might even show up to kiss a few hands and shake a few babies.
  • Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Sports Fans on both sides of the river were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if he planned to attend the Florence Freedom’s Opening Game at Erpenbeck Stadium Thursday night. “You Bet!” Kane said. “Those guys really love the game. It’s not just the money.”  “Just think,” added Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall, “The Reds’ Joey Votto gets paid more to show up for one game than all those freedom players together make all year.”

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose what Babe Ruth said, when told that his offered salary was more than President Herbert Hoover’s: “I had a better year than he did.”  

More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our May fund-raising drive from the Letter “F,” hoping for just as much publicity when it’s that letter’s turn.

D-WORDS HOT LINE

e-mail your dastardly DemocRAT descriptions today.

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