Monday, May 14, 2012

Definitely Worth Fighting For

Even a year after the long-awaited death of Osama’s bin Laden, our Eternal War on Terror continues, Obamatized DemocRATS and their Willing Accomplices in the Liberal Press continue to ask why we’re still fighting. So with Armed Forces Day coming up on May 19, maybe it’s time to find out what our American heroes are really fighting for.

Duty? Honor? County? What really keeps our American Fighting Men going so far from home? That’s why yesterday on Mother’s Day, we asked some of lonely young heroes so far from home overseas and they told us what really kept them going was thinking about all those MILFs back home.

Actually, it’s right there in the Declaration of Independence. Thomas Jefferson wrote, “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of MILFs.”
And even the Pledge of Allegiance says, “One nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and MILFs for all.”
Do you remember when Patrick Henry said, “Give me a MILF or give me a death?”
Nathan Hale said, “I regret that I have but one life to give to my MILF.”
John Paul Jones said, “I have not yet begun to fight for MILFs.”
George Washington said, “I cannot tell a lie. I really like MILFs.”
Samuel Adams said, “Someday they’ll name a beer after me, but in the meantime, just give me another MILF.”
Daniel Webster said, “One country, one constitution, one destiny, and many MILFs.”
At Gettysburg, Abraham Lincoln said, “The world will little note nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget MILFs.”
William Tecumseh Sherman said, “War is hell– without a MILF.”
George Armstrong Custer said, “Where in the hell did all those MILFs come from?”
Woodrow Wilson said, “Sometimes people call me an idealist. That’s why I like MILFs.”
Will Rogers said, “I never met a MILF I didn’t like.”
General George S. Patton said, “No bastard ever won a war dying for his MILF. He won it by making the other poor bastard die for his MILF.”
FDR said, “We have nothing to fear but MILFs.”
Douglas McArthur said, “I shall return– for a MILF.”
Harry Truman said, “The MILF stops here.”
Dwight D. Eisenhower said, “Only our individual faith in MILFs can keep us free”
Albert Einstein said, “So long as there are MILFs there will be wars.”
Sigmund Freud said, “Most of men’s problems can be traced to their subconscious feelings about MILFs.”
John Kennedy said, “Ask not what you can do for your MILFs.”
Neil Armstrong said, “A small step for man, one giant step for MILFs.”
Barry Goldwater said, “Extremism in the defense of MILFs is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of MILFs is no virtue.”
Vince Lombardi said, “Winning isn’t everything. MILFs are.”
Ronald Reagan said, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this MILF.”
John Wayne said, “Sure I love my country with all her faults– just like a MILF.”
Rev. Martin Luther King said,” had a dream– about MILFs.”
Bill Clinton said, “I tried a MILF once, but I didn’t inhale,” and “I did not have sex with that MILF.”
Charlton Heston said, “You’ll have to pry this MILF from my cold, dead hand.”
At every patriotic rally, Lee Greenwood always sings, “God Bless the MILFs.”
George W. Bush said, “It’s no use crying over spilled MILFs.”
Mitt Romney said, “Marriage is between a man and a MILF.”
And not to be outdone, Obama wrote a book about “Composite MILFs Who Loved Me.”