Monday, April 16, 2012

Three Quick Fixes

Disingenuous DemocRATS and Obama Supporters in the Press may still be blaming President Bush for everything that’s ever gone wrong in the country since the Battle of Bunker Hill, but tomorrow will still be your dreaded TAX DAY and The Blower once again offers these three common-sense suggestions to fix our whole tax-and-spending mess:

No withholding. No phony refunds. If folks had to write really big checks on TAX DAY, they’d actually know how much they’re paying.
Until we have a simple flat tax without all that paperwork, over-paid Congressmen should be forced to fill out every one of their constituents’ tax forms for free.
Hold EVERY election on TAX DAY!

We wonder if “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup or any of those Latter-Day Anti-Taxers who spoke Sunday afternoon at the Cincinnati Tea Party’s big Tax Day Rally on Fountain Square came up with something as simple as this. If they did, everybody who bothered to show up could’ve saved themselves a trip.

Not the “Ides of April”

April 15 is usually our dreaded Tax Day, but this year you have until Tuesday at 11:59 PM to make sure your check’s in the mail. But April 15 is not the “Ides of April,” although many of our readers feel like Julius Caesar on the Ides of March because our Crooks in Congress keep stabbing over-taxed payers in the back whenever they see how much money is being confiscated from their weekly paychecks. According to the Roman calendar, The Ides of April comes on April 13. Still, in our Whistleblower Minute, Hurley the Historian says:

On April 15, 1865, President Lincoln died, after being shot the night before at Ford’s Theater.
On April 15, 1912, the Titanic sank after striking an iceberg.
On April 15, 1986, Muammar al-Qaddafi was cleaning up his tent after President Reagan ordered the air strike on Lybia the night before.
But in 1954, APRIL 15 became the deadline for Income tax returns.
Though the Constitution banned a Federal Income Tax (Art.1, Sec.9), Lincoln passed an emergency income tax to pay for the Civil War. It was repealed in 1872.
An income tax was attempted in 1895, but the Supreme Court declared it unconstitutional in Pollock v Farmers’ Loan.
In 1913, with World War I threatening, Woodrow Wilson promoted the 16th Amendment, which was a 1 percent tax on the top 1 percent richest people.
In 1942, with World War II, Franklin Roosevelt passed “the greatest tax bill in American history.”
John F. Kennedy stated April 20, 1961: “In meeting the demands of war finance, the individual income tax moved from a selective tax imposed on the wealthy to the means by which the great majority of our citizens participate in paying.”
In 1988, President Reagan said: “I believe God did give mankind unlimited gifts to invent, produce and create. And for that reason it would be wrong for governments to devise a tax structure that suppresses those gifts.”

Now, during the Obama Recession, we have a new, easier tax form:

More Talk About Taxes

Our Quote for Today Committee forgot a lot of great quotes about taxes this morning, and couldn’t decide which one to choose. They found tax quotes from— of all places— the IRS, and they found quotations about taxes in The Quote Garden. But as the Official Voice of the Conservative Agenda, our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane likes Winston Churchill’s “There is no such thing as a good tax,” and our Quote for Today Committee wholeheartedly agrees.

And don’t forget to pay every cent of your taxes. In the City of Loveland, mean-spirited rent-a-prosecutors like Strauss & Troy’s Joe “The Killer Prosecutor” Braun will drag your ass into court for $1.16.

Please remember to pay your taxes……

25 million illegal aliens are depending on you!

But don’t forget, when calling the IRS, you still have to “press 1” for English

More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our April fund-raising drive by Turbo-Tax, guaranteeing to list all your illegal deductions in the right place on your tax form.

TAX TRAUMA HOT LINE

e-mail your tales of woe today.

Some non-deductible items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally non-deductible subscribers.

Anti-Tax Links of the Day

Myitax Funny Tax Commercial

Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

Whistleblower Newswire

Some of the News They Seem to Lose

Special “The Tax Man Cometh” E-dition