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Thursday, April 12, 2011
Happy Tax Freedom Day in Ohio, Everybody!
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Tax Freedom Day has finally arrived in Ohio, and everywhere you look, everybody’s ignoring it.
Republican Governor Kasich forgot to read a proclamation, acknowledging that this is the date our friends at the Tax Foundation say the average Ohio over-taxed payer has worked long enough to pay all of his federal, state, and local taxes for the year. Ohioans will spend an average of 29% of their incomes on federal, state, and local taxes in 2012. That’s more than the average family spends on food, clothing, and housing.
Ohio Republican Senator Rob Portman forgot to mention Tax Freedom Day too. He’s too busy sitting around waiting for reporters to call and ask if Mitt Romney had selected him as his running mate.
Ohio DemocRAT Senator Sherrod Brown thinks we don’t pay enough taxes, so if it were up to him, your Tax Freedom Day would be arriving sometime in September.
Hurley the Historian says FDR became a Good DemocRAT on this date in 1945. And that’s why your Quote for Today Committee chose FDR’s “Taxes shall be levied according to ability to pay. That is the only American principle.”
It would be a good day for local Members of Congress like Steve Chabothead or “Mean Jean” Schmidt, or and even those “Not Ready to Be in Congress” Primary Winners like “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup and William R. Smith to make “Tax Freedom Day” statements, if only any of them could find the time. It would even be a good day for local Tea Partiers to rally on Fountain Square.
And we’re really surprised Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen didn’t mention Tax Freedom Day when he was surrogating on TV for the Newtster explaining how even though Rick Santorum had raised the white flag at Gettysburg, Newt Gingrich was committed to staying in the race all the way to Tampa so that the conservative movement has a real choice. Wake up, McEwen–it’s way over.
In Cincinnati, Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory could give his Annual “State of the Taxes” Speech to report how many millions of over-taxed payer dollars the City had wasted and announcing this year’s percentage of the City’s Income Tax paid by Soreheads in the Suburbs who don’t get to vote. In the Official Republican Response, our Blue-faced Hamilton County RINO Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP picked Amy Murray, one of his “Five Who Didn’t Survive” on City Clown-cil to be totally ignored by the press. But the worst part was when The Windbag went off the reservation, gave his own so-called Republican Response, and couldn’t stop sucking up to Mallory.
Unfortunately, Alex T. was too busy Tweeting about the Reds, Ashwin was too busy hanging out with his DemocRAT buddies, and Maggie had some serious shoe-shopping to do at Kenwood Towne Centre Mall, so we didn’t see a video of Amy’s Republican Response on the Party Web Site at press time the next morning.
And over at the Hamilton County Court House, CH Snitch at 1000 Main Street says Commissioners are still trying to figure out how to come through on the Museum Center’s demand for a $150 million property tax increase to renovate the Union Terminal building (which is owned by the City) and Republicans for Higher are calling for a “Sales Tax Increase for the Arts.”
Meanwhile, at Mediocre American Ball Park, it’s only been a week since Opening Day and Typical Reds Rooter Farley Fairweather was wondering how much taxes Joey Votto would be paying for the games he’s played so far this year, since the fifth-place Reds’ .188-hitting All Star First Baseman has already earned slightly less than the first $1 million of his 2012 salary (and worth every penny, Senor Bob!)
Bluegrass Ballot-Stuffers
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says all those seven candidates running for Goof Doofus’ seat in Congress (Thomas Massie, Judge Once Moore, Brian D. Oerther, Alecia Webb-Edgington, Tom Wurtz, Marcus Carey, and Walter C. Schumm) were ignoring “Tax Freedom Day” in Kentucky when it arrived on Monday. Today there are still 40 more days until Kentucky’s May 22 Primary Elections. Maybe one of them will mention it yet.
Meanwhile, one has to wonder: was Tuesday’s Fiscal Court in Kenton County a circus side show or was it a government meeting? On the one hand, Commissioner Beth Sewell wants pre-approval when it comes to courthouse renovations, but no pre-approval when it comes to her spending county money for trips. The phrase “you can have your cake and eat it too” comes to mind! Beth asked for reimbursement for expenses on a trip she recently took on over-taxed payers’ expense.
Judge Arlinghaus said they need to be consistent with ALL county expenditures. After Sewell figured out she was not going to get her cash back right away, she went ballistic! She said she was going to tell her husband and he would come and see the Judge! What was that all about?
One Observer is now calling her our “Ticking Blondshell”
The Camboozeler just received word from a snitch at this week’s Boondoggle County Fiscal Court meeting that Judge Once Moore’s Trails and Greenways project is just like Obama-care. It just keeps getting bigger and bigger.
It turns out in order to qualify for the federal over-taxed payers’ grant money to purchase the land-locked Simpson property, Once Moore must provide “reasonable public access.” As a result of this apparent oversight, a contractor must be hired to assess the value of property needed for an easement. It seems the aptly named Simpson property has created yet another Homer Simpson situation for Once Moore and the over-taxed payers of Boondoggle County.
In a related story, Ken CamBoo has received numerous calls from property owners all over Northern Kentucky complaining about all those no Moore for Congress signs placed on their property without permission. All those disheartened voters were asking for the number to the Thomas Massie campaign office in order to replace those no Moore signs with Massie signs.
And has Hell finally frozen over? Finally, there will be lights in the parking lot at Boondoggle Courthouse! Never thought that would happen. The only problem now is the cost to do it. One bid came in at $73,000 and the other was over $90,000. Never missing a beat ,Judge Once Moore told the crowd that the public works will do the work and keep it in house, saving over-taxed payers’ dollars. Great way of disguising what costs will really be. If you add county benefits and wages of county employees, you’ll have a $100,000 job. What a savings! Sad thing is, the original cost to put the lights in when parking lot was built, was only $30,000. Go figure! (Robin Curry, the fella’ who botched this up in the first place, is now off selling insurance.)- Finally, one of the CamBoozler’s Sexiest Snitches sent him this picture. The Kentucky General Assembly ends its legislative session today (on Thursday) and it looks like Kooky Katie Stine is pounding the gavel to Sine Die on David Williams’ head.
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TAXED ENOUGH ALREADY HOT LINE
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Some Tea Party Approved items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Tea Party Approved Subscribers.
LINK OF THE DAY
Tax Freedom Day: The Song!
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.