Sunday, March 4, 2012
The Blower’s Week in Review
OUR NUMBER ONE LOCAL STORY THIS WEEK was when Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders said now that Mitt Romney has won GOP Presidential Primaries in Arizona and Michigan and according to our GOP Delegate Calculator only needs about 982 more delegates to win the Republican Party nomination, every so-called political writer in Ohio and talking head on TV will be tell us how important the Ohio Primary will be on Super Duper Tuesday in only five more days. Isn’t out state motto “Ohio, the Heart of It All?”
What do you think all those so-called political writers in other states with GOP primaries on March 6 (like Alaska, Georgia, Idaho, Massachusetts, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Vermont, and Virginia) are telling their audiences?
Also this primary season, everybody’s talking about how many gazillions of dollars the Ohio RINO Party is spending to keep their stooges on the Republican State Central Committee, and how much the Ohio GOP House Caucus spending all that money on lying ads to protect its lackeys like $tate Rep-tile for $ale Peter $tautberg, whose funds are coming from the Bungals organization and donors outside the District. The Blower bets whenever those reports are in, we’ll find out it’s a lot.
“Taxkiller Tom” Brinkman says that the first one to identify the two sexy MILFs in his last-minute radio spot will win a free lunch at a really nice place with real china and silverware. Knowing how cheap the “Taxkiller” is, that is quite an offer.”
And did you notice that every time Republican Ohio Attorney General Mike DeWhine endorses somebody in this year’s presidential primary, the guy loses the next week. Maybe that’s why Judge P-P-P-Patrick DeWhine says, “I hope dad endorses Bruce Whitman for Appeals Court when I run against him in November. Maybe that’s why P-P-P-Patrick was seen enjoying a Lobbyist’s Lunch on Friday with Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka, Defeated DemocRAT 20101 Ohio Auditor Candidate David A. Pepper, and State Senator Eric Kearney.
And what’s the reason so many people still haven’t decided which candidate to support with only five more days until the Primary Election? Maybe those Dumbed-down, Self-absorbed, Media-influenced, Celebrity-obsessed, Politically-correct Uninformed Short-attention-span voters are just waiting for those endorsement idiotorials in The Fishwrap.
OUR NUMBER TWO LOCAL STORY THIS WEEK was when every Liberal in America went ballistic after Conservative Radio Talk Show Host Rush Limbaugh called a 30-year-old DemocRAT Nymphomaniac Sandra Fluke a “slut,” just because she told Congress the government should pay her $1,000-a-year for contraceptives.
It must be a really important story, because Obama called the trollop to tell her how proud he was of her. The DemocRAT Congressional Campaign Committee has even created an anti-Limbaugh petition that calls on Republican leaders to “denounce Rush Limbaugh’s cruel tirade against women.”
And House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi called on Limbaugh to apologize for his comments. That apparently just spurred him on. Thursday on his nationally syndicated show he said: “So Miss Fluke, if we are going to … pay for you to have sex, we want something for it. We want you to post the videos online so we can all watch.”
Not only that, Former DemocRAT Pants-Dropper-in-Chief Bill Clinton said, “I did not have sex with that woman…,” then asked for the tramp’s cell phone number.
AND OUR NUMBER THREE LOCAL STORY THIS WEEK was after The Blower told you Cincinnati mayor Mark Mallory and his Kentucky butt boy Dough Boy Honey were willing and eager to destroy the city just to give blacks jobs, no matter whether they are poorly qualified or deadbeats. A prime example was their selection of useless police chief James Craig over better police chief candidates who happened to be white.
Craig has not taken the Ohio law enforcement certification. He has no power to arrest anyone and he cannot enforce Ohio laws. The former Lincoln Heights (never known for high standards) police chief Ron Twitty was let go when he didn’t take the same test.
A week ago, useless chief Craig sent a letter to the director of the Ohio peace officer training commission, saying he should not have to qualify by taking the test. One of his reasons was that he couldn’t pass the exam. Imagine that. The Cincinnati, Ohio, police chief can’t pass the Ohio law enforcement exam. Back on January 26, The Blower told you Craig couldn’t pass the test.
Craig was granted a hearing at the Ohio peace officer training commission for March 15 to try to convince them to exempt him. Maybe a delegation of concerned Cincinnati citizens and certified police officers who had to take and pass the test should attend that meeting in London, Ohio on March 15 to voice their thoughts to the commission.
Further on the topic of the Cincinnati city mess, reader Bob from Symmes Township writes in to say: “Cincinnati is a case study in blatant self-destruction. Mark Mallory and his various city clown-cils have systematically destroyed the city.
“People thought they were voting for change last November when in fact they voted in a majority of lemmings who follow the mayor blindly in his blunders. Mallory has done nothing to stem the population flight out of the city and laughs when the city loses businesses. He does nothing about abandoned and foreclosed property or the pandemic drug dealings going on every minute of the day. Mallory and his boy Dohoney openly favor blacks over others, even to the detriment of the city. Cincinnati is now just another Detroit, thanks to Mallory.”
Finally, Terrible Tester Tino Delgato says new Cincinnati Police Chief Craig wants to skip the state police exam. On a separate note several High School students have stated they do not want to take the SAT’s to get into college. After all Mayor Mark Mallory did not have to take a test or hold a real job. Go Figure!!!
MONDAY in our Special “It’s Hard to Believe Black History Month Is Almost Over” E-dition, The Blower asked Whitey if he wasn’t feeling guilty enough yet:
Has this been the greatest Black History Month or what? With Obama in the White House, we’re really amazed they’re not calling it “Half-Black History Month.”
No wonder Buckwheat Blackwell and Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane are so proud, after WLW Hate Radio’s Racist-in-Residence Bill Cunningham presented the pair with their coveted 2012 Ebony and Ivory Racial Healing Awards, sponsored by Sambo’s Restaurants, for reminding everybody that not only was Martin Luther King a Republican, but so was Abraham Lincoln, you know— the 16th President of these United States who actually freed the slaves.
And as always, all Racial Healing Items in the Whistleblower (like the one above) have been approved in advance by long-time Belligerent Black Blogger Nate “Rhymes With Hate” Livingston and Scott Greenwood, Ohio Representative to the National American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) Board, because you never know when some crazy person is going to sue you for something.
- TUESDAY in our Special “Race Card Update” E-dition, The Blower It’s Only OK when the DemocRATS do it, and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
When we yelled “Stop the Presses” to announce the Obama Re-election Campaign had played the “Race Card” by launching “African American’s for Obama” during Black History Month, we forgot to mention The Blower had already reported it on February 5. —The Drudge Report (getting scooped one more time)
Imagine the uproar if the Republican National Committee launched “Whites for Republicans” just before today’s primary elections in Arizona and Michigan. —Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, and Ron Paul
We can hardly wait until Obama takes full credit for “Leap Day” tomorrow. —Conservative Calendar Makers
And now that Black History Month is almost over, everybody’s wondering when it’ll be “White History Month.” —Curious Caucasians
What’s the biggest difference between Black History Month and St. Patrick’s Day? On St. Patrick’s Day everybody wants to be Irish. —WLW Hate Radio Trash Talker Bill Cunningham
Maybe that’s why we chose Rush Limbaugh’s: “Have you ever noticed how all composite pictures of wanted criminals resemble Jesse Jackson?” —Your Quote for Today Committee
WEDNESDAY in our Official “Leap Year” E-dition, The Blower said any other Official Leap Year E-dition you might see is surely a fake!
Leap Day magic is all around. Can’t you feel it? Unfortunately, due to Obama’s worldwide recession, there will be no Leap Day bonuses this year. Besides today being an extra day, other things happen every four years. This year there’s the Olympics in London. The Presidential Elections is now only “250” days away. And our Bill Clinton says “Thank goodness, BB&BJ Day comes every year on March 20.”
Everybody’s still talking about the Oscars. All those Facebook fanatics who can tell you what every celebrity was wearing at the Oscars last year still can’t name Ohio’s two U.S. Senators. Those Dumbed-down, Self-absorbed, Media-influenced, Celebrity-obsessed, Politically-correct Uninformed Short-attention-span people still get to vote, too!
Hurley the Historian says on this Leap Date in 1940, Hattie McDaniel was the first black actress to win an Oscar for her portrayal of “Mammy,” a housemaid and former slave in “Gone with the Wind.” How’s that for another Black History Moment? Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Hattie’s “I’d rather play a slave than be one.”
And in other Black History Madness, our Late Night Jokewatcher says President Obama talked about rising gas prices today. He focused on the positive things his administration has done when it comes to energy prices. So, in other words, it was the shortest speech he’s ever given.
THURSDAY, in our Special “It May Be a Brand New Month” E-dition, The Blower said “But our Long National nightmare is far from over”:
Now that Black History Month is finally almost over, everybody’s wondering when it’ll be “White History Month.”
Probably never, since we now have to pander to all those other minority groups. For example, March is now officially One-Eyed Hunchback Lithuanian Lesbians History Month. WLW Hate Radio trash talker Bill Cunningham says, “Now that February is over, maybe we can use the word ‘niggardly’ again without being called racists.”
And with this year’s Black History Month (now called Half-Black History Month in honor of the current resident at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue) only 29 days long, several Black guys still didn’t get their “profiles” in The Fishwrap. To deserving darkies like Nate “Rhymes with Hate” Livingston, “Buckwheat” Blackwell, and Ken “Mad Dawg” Lawson, Metro Mole says one of Skaggie Maggie’s minions is now writing his sincerest apologies.
However all month at the end of every aisle at Kroger grocery store you saw a photograph and biography of a black person. In Hyde Park, these were the only black people In the entire store.
Even The Blower ran out of days this month and couldn’t run a Black History Month Racial Healing Profile for That Corrupt Evicted Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Bought-and-paid-For Tax-and-Spend Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch’s eviler twin sister Jennifer Black.
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry.”
FRIDAY in our Special “Political Stooges” E-dition, The Blower said Everybody has his price
Today it’s the Top Ten Reasons Ohio Second District Republican Congressional Candidate Fred Kundrata was recruited to get into the race and attack “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s war hero opponent Brad Wenstrup:
10. I forgot
9. The dog ate it
8. She told me she loved me
7. I did it to help the homeless
6. The Devil made me do it
5. I just wanted to be loved–is there anything wrong with that?
4. I’m a pilot
3. I was framed
2. This whole thing is just one big terrible mistake
…and the Number One Reason Ohio Second District Congressional Candidate Fred Kundrata was recruited to get into the race and attack “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s war hero opponent Brad Wenstrup is… the guys at the “Mean Jean’s” Office said nobody would ever find out.
- SATURDAY in our Special “Pre-Election Weekend” E-dition, The Blower asked if you’ve had enough of those lying commercials yet:
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says today it’s only three more days (and about 427 more robocalls) until Super Duper Tuesday on March 6, and you can feel the excitement in each one of our 88 counties. All over Ohio, so-called political writers and talking heads on TV will be tell us “It’s the most import Ohio Primary Election in history,” because after all, isn’t our state motto “Ohio, the Gall Bladder of It All?”
Three of the four 2012 Presidential Hopefuls will be flying around the state today looking for votes. Romney, Gingrich, and Santorum will be attending the taping of Fox News’ Huckabee show Saturday at the former DHL facility in Wilmington where more than 8,000 people lost their jobs when the place closed.
Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, and Mitt Romney will even be in Southwestern Ohio: Newt’s free event is at 9 A.M. at the Back Porch Saloon in Hamilton. Rick’s free event at the Crowne Plaza in Blue Ash is at 9:30 A.M. and it’s “All the Free Ribs You Can Eat with Mitt” at the Montgomery Inn Boathouse at 6:15 P.M. These events are such a BFD, down at Hamilton County RINO Party Headquarters, Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP’s DemocRAT Errand Boy Ashwin Corattiyil even sent out an e-mail to promote both events in the order of their appearance.
THE SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
REPUBLICANS IN 2012: Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says people are insane to believe the GOP Primary Process will be over on Super Duper Tuesday. After March 6, there will still be 32 more primaries before the end of June.- OBAMA 2012: Nobody is listening to Obama very much these days. For one reason, Republicans have all that Super Duper Tuesday hype going for them and Obama sounds deranged likening himself to Gandhi and Nelson Mandella these days, while being quoted saying “The one thing Michelle allows me to watch is ESPN.” Why else would Saturday’s Weekly Radio Address be about how he personally saved the American automobile industry.
- OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER: liked Jay Leno’s “While visiting a GM plant President Obama pledged to buy a Chevy Volt after his presidency ends in five years. Today Mitt Romney said, ‘Make it one year and I’ll buy it for you.’ ”
- THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says three of the states are gimmes as far as Mitt Romney’s concerned – Massachusetts, Vermont and Virginia. Rick Santorum was miles ahead in Oklahoma less than two weeks ago. But back then he was also 18 points ahead in Ohio, probably the biggest prize of the day. Now the Buckeye State is a tossup – Santorum 33%, Mitt Romney 31%.
MORE POLITICS UNUSUAL: Radio Legend Earl Pitts is back on the air lambasting That Corrupt Evicted Lying Plagiarizing Meddling Overblown Bought-and-paid-For Tax-and-Spend Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch Mean Jean Schmidt. Is he a great American or what?
And did the Highland County Press really run its endorsement of War Hero Brad Wenstrup on the front page after Mean Jean’s News Flack Barrett Brunsman tried to intimidate the publisher into retracting his endorsement of Bronze Star Brad.
MEDIA MENDACITY: On The Forest Hills Urinal really outdid itself this week trying to convince its Dumbed-down, Self-absorbed, Media-influenced, Celebrity-obsessed, Politically-correct Uninformed Short-attention-span Readers to vote for the Forest Gump School’s humongous tax hike so township property owners of $200,000 houses can pay $2,000-a-year to support the greedy teachers and administrators. Just read the headlines on all of these unfairly biased so-called guest columns:
“A yes vote will continue quality education”
“Supporting levy is a wise investment”
“More money does mean better education”
“A yes vote may save you money”
“Levy is a deal”
“Kids worth the yes vote”
“Support Education”
“Support is needed for excellence”
How much can we afford to lose if the levy fails?”
And “Thank school teachers with a yes vote on the levy.”
And you thought Liberal Bias was confined to the mainstream media.
READING THE TEA LEAVES: There must be an election coming up one of these days, because our local Tea Party Patriots are really active. The Anderson Tea Party, which usually doesn’t endorse candidate, has even published its slate, which includes not supporting that humongous Forrest Gump School District tax hike.- OHIO RINO PARTY: Think about how many gazillions of dollars the Ohio RINO Party is spending to keep their stooges on the Republican State Central Committee. Wouldn’t that money be better spent battling Obama and his Disingenuous DemocRATS between now and November?
- BLACK HISTORY MONTH: Just as The Blower predicted, Cincinnati New Extreme Liberal City Clown-cil approved giving away one million dollars in over-taxed payers’ funds to a deadbeat black woman.
Only Chris Seelbach, SMLP Christopher Smithermouth, and Foxy Roxy Qualls voted against the soon-to-be down the sewer drain giveaway. The rest of the fools voted for it, including rich boy lazy dilettante P.G. Sittenfeld, who campaigned on helping the city pay its bills.
Deadbeat restaurant owner Liz Rogers will shutter the not-yet-opened Banks Soul Food Bistro within two years, unless she talks our Nine Fine Clowns into giving her another million dollars to protect their investment.
- VOTER FRAUD: Why have there been so few complaints of voter fraud leading up to Super Duper Tuesday on March 6? Don’t our Dishonest DemocRATS have any reasons to go to the polls?
- LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” Human Events says, instead of using the term “Liberal,” why not try “libtard?” It’s apt (liberal + retard = libtard), it’s highly offensive, and quite wonderfully not Politically Correct. What’s not to like?
- MORE FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERY: The person who organized the ice cream for votes scandal has been named a “Woman of the Year” by The Fishwrap: Gwendolyn Ivory Robinson of Springfield Township is a former principal of the Academy of World Languages School. Since retiring in 1999, she has volunteered with the Taft High School Strive for Excellence Program, Bethany House, Matthew 25 Ministries, NAACP, Lincoln Crawford Nursing Home, Black Family Reunion, AKA Service Sorority and Top Ladies of Distinction.
HAMILTON COUNTY RINO PARTY: This week, Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP claimed his organization has gone to great lengths to steer clear of endorsing or supporting any particular candidate in any particular primary. At least Alex T. remembered his most important mission is to defeat President Obama in 2012. But like all Real Republican, The Blower is still trying to figure out what Old Blue Face’s missions for Cincinnati and Hamilton County.- REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES: strongly endorsed Mean Jean Schmidt for Congress, citing her record of higher taxes, breaking ethics laws, growing government, bailouts for billionaires, and standing with disgraced and still-waiting-to-be disbarred liberal $tan Che$ley. They believe Brad Wenstrup must be stopped at all costs due to his conservative beliefs and record of serving his country in Iraq.
IN ANDERSON: When Whacky Jacky O’Brien’s Illegitimate Son Kevin finally shows up in court at 9:30 AM on March 5, will Judge Nadel take it easy on our Disgraced Unapologetic Township Trustee, just because his wife is divorcing him, his bank foreclosed on his house at 7964 Hopper Road (for a mere $373,137.80) in “the third most affluent neighborhood in America,” and he forgot to pay his property taxes when it comes time to hear Kevin’s previous employer Baird & Company’s lawsuit against him for a paltry $378,000? [SEE COURT RECORDS HERE]
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL (OUR ODIOUS OCTEGENARIAN), THE BARD OF CLEVES: A little late for Mardi Gras, we just came across his “Lust in My Heart,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
Want Some Pretty Beads, Little Girl?
Fashion says it’s OK
To put young girls’ charms on display
But if you should just touch
I’ll tell you this much
The cops will put you away.
IN CLERMONT COUNTY: After that tornado touched down in Clermont County this week, the Cronies are wondering if there was any damage to Mean Jean’s house.
And our Clermont Crusader says this candidate wearing an Archie Wilson t-shirt now disowns Wilson. Can you guess his identity?
- IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says thanks to all of the police and firefighters who helped with the devastation in Piner, Kentucky today. And to Kenton County Public Works Manager Chris Warnerford, your comment of “this storm is cutting in to my drinking time” was totally uncalled for.
- THIS WEEK IN KENTON CIRCUIT COURT: The latest and greatest e-dition of Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth’s Attorney E Rob Sanders historically accurate and (sort of) politically correct e-newsletter is on cyber-news stands now! This week’s This Week In Kenton Circuit Court features the usual array of bummers, dregs, and Bungals but still no mention of NKY’s (second) most infamous sex-ed teacher that may still be a Ben-gal! Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken Camboo thought surely the Robster would jump all over the case now that her attorney is sans law license for 61 days! Oh well, maybe next week…
ANOTHER FRIVOLOUS LAWSUIT UPDATE: WLW Radio Hottie Lady Lawyer Lisa Wells won this week’s Whistleblower Limerick Contest with the following entry:
Don’t worry about Crazy Eric’s suspension
It’s no cause for your old hypertension
He’ll just be counting the days,
And planning the ways
To still have plenty of media attention.
- HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says today is the 151st Anniversary of Abraham Lincoln’s First Inauguration and Republicans across the country and closer here to home have much to celebrate. The Party of Lincoln working hard to take down that most integral pillar to DemocRAT power – the unions. If successful, the GOP will destroy the largest base of support for the DemocRATS since Lincoln attacked and destroyed the Slave Power seven score and eleven years ago.
- OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE: says Doughfaces like that good-for-nothing Bill “The Ethnic Cleanser” Seitz ought to heed Lincoln’s advice on the slave power when confronting the union power: “If ever I get a chance to hit that thing, I shall hit it and hit it hard!”
THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane about that CFK-TV’s Political Science Theatre 2012 on Anderson Community Television’s Channel.
They must really like it at the station, Kane explained. Or why else would they be showing it on their own web page?
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”: The Blower’s Campaign Countdowns to will continue. Speaking of which, the 2012 Elections are only “246” days away, the March Primary in Ohio is two days away, and the Bluegrass primary in May 22 is 84 days away.
Monday we’ll be explaining our endorsement policy.
Tuesday you’ll be reading “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers,” about all those last minute dirty tricks candidates are using to try to win the primary elections on Super Duper Tuesday.
Wednesday we’ll be adding up the new Republican Delegate Count and listening to all that post-election day spin.
Thursday, our Good Friend Bobby Leach says BB&BJ Day is exactly two weeks away. That’s really something to celebrate.
The first line of Friday’s limerick will be: “After Super Duper Tuesday’s Elections.”
And Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says Stocks eased off their lows but still failed to close in positive territory Friday. Gains were limited following a robust rally in recent weeks and no major news on the economic front gave investors little reason to jump in.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
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Some political scorekeeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political scorekeeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
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