SUNDAY, DECEMBER 29, 2019
Best Illegal Impeachment Ever
Trump’s 1,073rd Day In Office
Top Twelve List
Today It’s The Dirty Dozen Ways You Know It’s About Time For 2019 To Be Over:
12. Having to listen to all those Lunatic Liberals complain about our Twittereer-in-Chief every time they get trolled by The White House. You know The Trumpster is never going to stop.
11. The nation has now surpassed the $23 Trillion Debt Level with no end in sight.
10. Fake News is such a problem, the Trumpster needs to run another KING OF FAKE NEWS CONTEST
9. We’re Praying For Prosecutions, especially since Americans are just beginning to hear about all those Illegal Impeachers, #MuellerGate Malefactors, FBI Felons, Congressional Culprits, Media Miscreants, and DOJ Disseminaters.
8. Waiting to see how much the Whistleblower Boycott costs all of those ungrateful millionaire NFL players and the Obtuse Owners who enable them.
7. Hoping our Feckless Fishwrappers finally get themselves included in the FAKE NEWS Big Leagues, along with the likes of ABC, CBS, NBC, NYT, WaPo, and LAT, especially since most voters find the Big Three network newscasts and the nation’s three largest liberal newspapers “untrustworthy,” continuing a trend in The Blower that started long before President Trump hit the scene, but one that has certainly escalated since he moved into the White House.
6. Delusional Ohio Governor John Kasich will continue to get great publicity in The Fishwrap every time he does or says something stupid enough to piss off President Trump and the Real Republicans in Ohio.
5. Anderson Trustee President Andy Pappas never really explained how much that intersection at Beechmont and Five Mile “really cost” We the Over-taxed Payers and Stupid Voters In The Forest Hills School District finally have the School Board they truly deserve.
4. Folks who showed up at “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s Christmas Party at Jack Casino have finally figured out why “Her Meanness” is planning to run for State Rep instead of a Federal Office.
3. Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters and $tan Che$ley are still not supposed to be practicing law, but Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says there’s still no outstanding Bench Warrant for “Crazy Eric” in Boondoggle County like there is for $tan.
2. Politicians’ last-minute e-mails reminded you that you only have a few more hours to send in your 2019 contributions before the end of the year.
…and the Number One Way you know it’s about time for 2019 to be over is… Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane has almost finished this year’s list of his political predictions that came true, so Tuesday night, it’ll be time for the Whistleblower New Year’s Eve Party to begin.