Monthly Archives: May 2012

Special “Obama’s Kill List” E-dition

One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories. 

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Do You Think Mitt Romney Is Now On the List?

  • Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Tuesday night, the Romney Campaign surpassed the 1,144 delegates needed to secure the Presidential Nomination at the Republican National Convention in Tampa, and for those who’ve been counting the days since Obama’s inauguration, the next “158” days until the Presidential Elections in November still seem light years away.
  • Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says 46% see the Obama-Romney race as a choice between the Lesser of Two Evils. That’s why the day before every election, The Blower always reminds you what those Loony Libertarians always say: A vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for evil. People who don’t stand for something will fall for anything. No matter the outcome, you should never ever vote for a candidate you don’t really believe in.
  • Continuing with the words that begin with the letter “I,”  I N C O M P E T E N T  has the same number of letters as B A R A C K  O B A M A, and  Monday, the least effective commander-in-chief ever  I N S U L T E D the entire nation of Poland and all Polish Americans with his latest teleprompter-less gaffe.  During a speech honoring one of the heroes of the Nazi occupation of Poland he remarked that “the Polish death camps” were indeed horrible.  Horrible indeed, numbnuts!  They were Nazi death camps you ignoramus.   He can now kiss that kielbasa voting bloc goodbye!  Who can also forget the time he stated that “he was going to campaign in all of our 57 states”…….WTF?  Can this moron even count?  So much for that Ivy league edumacation!  We can only wonder if the LECICE (Least Effective Commander In Chief Ever) has ever studied geography or recent history. Our next word will be I R R E F U T A B L E. And is Obama now telling Jewish audiences that he knows more about Judiasm “than any other president.” Maybe that’s because “All his friends in Chicago were Jewish.” Now’s that for Chutzpah!
  • In a related item, Hurley the Historian says in 1889, this was the date of the Johnstown Flood, when heavy rain and a neglected dam led to the catastrophe in which 2,209 people die and a prosperous city was nearly wiped off the face of the earth. OK, all you Failed Cincinnati Public Schools Graduates, in which state is Johnstown located.
  • And speaking of the Dumbing Down of America, Obama calls protest-singing Bob Dylan and Toni Morrison, a novelist who can’t write a book without having a white man rape someone, “heroes” but can’t quite use that word to describe our military, including the ones who saved his Presidency by killing Osama bin Laden.
  • In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says POLITIFACT’s Truth Meter rates GOP Senate Candidate Josh Mandel’s campaign ad “False” that claims Ohio’s Disingenuous DemocRAT U.S. Senator Sherrod Brown “cast the deciding vote on the government takeover of health care.” Actually 60 D-RATS voted for Obamacare, and every opponent of every one of them running for re-election is probably making the same claim.
  • Republicans for Higher Taxes tells us they are writing a series on RINO Sheriff candidate Sean Donovan and his support for the Cincinnati Streetcar project.  Last night they posted their first entry, which introduces us to a pro-streetcar editorial written by Donovan.  Many conservatives want to know why the Hamilton County RINO Party is running a big-government streetcar candidate for Sheriff.  Chairman Alex TryinToFoolYou promises the local GOP will be fiscally conservative, yet recruited a candidate who thinks we should spend $110 million on our Dainty DemocRAT Mayor’s Trolley Folly.  Is this how Donovan will spend your money as Sheriff?
  • Local Obama Voter Fraud Training begins tonight at the Obama Office in East Walnut Hills.
  • Meanwhile, did the local Hamilton County RINO Party really schedule a “Young Professional Happy Hour” tonight at the same time the Blue Chip Young Republicans are having their May meeting featuring Congressman-in-Waiting “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup, who obviously needs all the help he can get?
  • Everybody’s wondering which one of Alex T.’s campaign geniuses put the following message on Bronze Star’s Facebook:   

I was honored to attend the dedication of Hillsboro’s veterans memorial yesterday. Highland County demonstrated their (sic) lasting dedication to our fallen servicemen and women by raising over $100,000 for the new memorial, and the ceremony was a moving reminder of the legacy our fallen soldiers leave behind.

According to that big on-line story in The Highland County Press, since we could not find his name mentioned anywhere, “Bronze Star Brad” must’ve been AWOL from that event.  

  • Our City Hall Snitch says current Cincinnati Police Chief James Craig retired from the LAPD with a service pension which is based on his years of service in Los Angeles.  He did not ask for, nor receive, a disability pension from the Los Angeles Fire and Police Pension system.
  • Several people sitting in traffic on Beechmont Avenue wondered why Craig’s Constables allowed that road to be shut down for three hours because of one wreck?
  • Typical Reds Rooter Farley Fairweather is still celebrating the Reds in first place, but Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall says the top three home run hitters in the American League are all former Reds.  In third place, former strikeout machine Adam Dunn has 16 dingers for the White Sox. In second place, former error machine Edwin Encarnacion has 18 taters for the Toronto Blue Jays.  Leading the league, again, is former outfielder Josh Hamilton who was judged too fragile for the Reds to keep him and look after him.  Somehow, the Texas Rangers have figured out how to do that.  Of the three, only Hamilton showed actual talent when he was here, so they traded him for a pitcher who had less control of his pitches than Hamilton had of his pot.   Dunn and Encarnacion totally stank here.  What is it about playing in Cincinnati that causes people to play so poorly here and then play so well for other people?
  • In Anderson Township, members of CABOOM (whatever the hell that means) who have been fighting Martin Marietta for the last four years had hoped that the Township would not side with Martin Marietta in the pending appeal. In fact, CABOOMers claim on more than one occasion the township administrator assured CABOOM members and the news media that Martin Marietta would be on its own if they appealed Judge Ruehlman’s reversal of the Board of Zoning Appeals’ approval of Martin Marietta’s plans for a major underground mining operation. Then Township Trustees filed a 35-page brief supporting Martin Marietta’s appeal! Nothing like that ever would’ve happened before Disgraced Dis-trustee Kevin O’Brien got elected.
  • Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes says recent news of trans-Atlantic capacity reductions sent Delta Airlines’ stock down about 7%. Some people recommend investors sell DAL now because it could fall much further. As more investors realize how much the company is propping up its earnings with pension and postretirement plan assumptions, the stock could plummet again.
  • The weather seems to be hotter this spring, and do-gooders are already asking you to donate a fan, a brand new window air conditioner, or provide a monetary donation now through August 13 to help local families in need have proper cooling and ventilation this summer.

Our Compassionate Conservative remembers a few years ago when those Blue Chip Young Republicans were selling T-Shirts that said, “What Happened to the Goddam Fans We Gave You Last Year.”

No wonder The Blower always reminds subscribers donating fans or air-conditioners during the summer heat wave to write on it with a big black permanent marker: “THIS IS A FREE FAN –  A GIFT TO THE POOR- NOT FOR Re-SALE!”

  • Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were complaining that their electric bills would be increasing because of the sizzling summer temperatures. “Whistleblower readers have always known where to see our local utility company ridiculed,” explained Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane, “especially nearly 21 years ago in the July 16, 1991 Edition, with parody ads like the one for C G & E.”

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Yogi Berra’s “It ain’t the heat. It’s the humility.”


 So When Did The Blower Actually Begin?

Down in the catacombs, AJ the Archivist reminds us The Blower missed a great opportunity to remind all our readers about our humble beginnings yesterday, when it was the 22nd Anniversary of The Whistleblower’s very first edition. Our single printed page (Edition #1 on May 29, 1990) looked something like this:

“Enquiring Minds” want to know. Why is the Cincinnati Enquirer ignoring some of Hamilton County’s biggest scandals? Who do these stories only appear in the Cincinnati Post? Among recent news that never appeared in The Enquirer:

  • SHERRIFF LEIS HIRES HIS DAUGHTER VIOLATING STATE ETHICS LAWS
  • PROSECUTOR NEY REFUSES TO PROSECUTE LEIS
  • CLERK OF COURT DETERS PRESENTLY EMPLOYING HIS BROTHER (at a salary $5,000 higher than comparable employees)
  • ANOTHER DETERS EMPLOYEE GETTING $40,000 FOR A 26-HOUR WEEK
  • DETERS FIRES DOUBLE-DIPPING REPUBLICAN LAWYER STRIGARI

          INSIDE SCOOP on why these stories weren’t covered by The Enquirer: BILL KEATING is back as President of the paper. Former Republican Judge and Congressman. Still very active in party affairs. Word in the street is that KEATING is personally killing stories about Court House corruption to protect Republican officeholders. This may also explain why Political Reporter HOWARD WILKINSON’s regular Sunday column has not run the past two weeks.

          Longtime Sharonville Mayor JOHN DOWLIN (also a longtime Republican) took out petitions to run as an “Independent” for County Commissioner against appointed-Republican STEVE CHABOT and Republican-turned-Democrat JOHN MIRLISENA. DOWLIN reportedly mad about being passed over by Republicans for a county post. Here’s the deal—DOWLIN has been promised the Republican appointment to replace County Commissioner TAFT. TAFT, running for Secretary of State, plans to resign prior to the Election—but late enough so his replacement won’t have to face the voters for two years. DOWLIN has party Honcho KOHNEN’s “pledge.” Remember—you read it here first.

In case you’re wondering, that private company that’s getting big bucks to screw up the computer programs in the COUNTY RECORDER’s office is owned by a bunch of attorneys at Graydon, Head & Richey. That’s the law firm of JOE HEAD, local Republican Party Finance Chairman. The private company has been “working” on the program for about two years, collecting fat fees, and the damn thing is still a total mess.

Things have hardly changed a lot during the past twenty years!


Bluegrass Bulletin

  • In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says last week he received a call advising him that there would be a unity rally next Monday June at a location to be announced and that even Bitch McConnell would be coming, but we still haven’t received official confirmation.

Do you think The Blower should scoop The Fishwrap with the following post: “The Blower has received word from a snitch standing outside the now vacated Goof Doofus Office in Ft. Mitchell that a unity rally has been scheduled by Fourth District Chairperson Alicia Webb Edgington, Senator Bitch McConnell, and Congressman Goof Doofus to be held at a yet-to-be-named location on D-Day, the Sixth of June?

The purpose of the rally is to sing cum-bah-ah and bury at least seven hatchets.” The Blower will be glad to publish the arrangements just as soon as we receive word and maybe another walking around commercial or two from our Trooper Babe.    


More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

 Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our May fund-raising drive from St. Vincent De Paul, for helping publicize all that free stuff they’re giving away to poor people, so they can resell it.  


OBAMA’S KILL LIST HOT LINE

e-mail your terrorist targets today.

 Some cold-blooded items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally cold-blooded subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use more.


Link of the Day

Not Even Half

 

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