Tag Archives: “Mean Jean Schmidt’s” Twelve Days of Christmas

Another “Friday’s Features” E-dition

The Whistleblower Newswire Is Your Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda
TODAY IS
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 07, 2018
Trump’s 686th Day In Office

— Updating The Blower’s Iconic “Twelve Days of Christmas” —

The Blower’s iconic “Twelve Days of Christmas” began in 2006 as a one-line joke. We couldn’t even afford an illustration way back then.

Now let’s all sing the first verse of “That Lying Plagiarizing Bitch Mean Jean Schmidt’s Twelve Days of Christmas,” sent in by the Ghost of “Clean Gene” Ruehlmann, who says, “None of this would’ve ever happened if I were still alive.” It goes something like this:

On the First Day of Christmas, “Mean Jean” gave to me:
One Old Crapper, just for Portman’s Legacy.

And for the next twelve years The Blower’s “Twelve Days of Christmas” has evolved and been embellished so that this Monday in our 2018 “Multi-Cultural Holidays” E-dition, The Blower began publishing this year’s version of “Mean Jean Schmidt’s Twelve Days of Christmas,” again sent in by the Ghost of “Clean Gene” Ruehlmann, who still said, “Hamilton County would still be ‘Red’ if I were still alive.” The first verse goes something like this:

On the First Day of Christmas, “Mean Jean” gave to me:
One Old Crapper, from Rob Portman’s Legacy.

Later on Monday in our “Holidays Dispirited” E-dition, Persons of Consequence saw

ALSO IN CLERMONT COUNTY: It’s time for the Crony Chorus to sing the Second Day of “Mean Jean Schmidt’s” Twelve Days of Christmas,” sent in by “Mean Jean’s” Eviler Twin Sister Jennifer Black, after “Mean Jean” was again featured on MTV’s “Awesomely Bad Celebrity Fashions.” It goes something like this:
“On the Second Day of Christmas, ‘Mean Jean’ gave to me,
Two Red Dresses,
And one old Crapper, from Rob Portman’s Legacy.”

Wednesday in The Blower’s Joyous Tidings E-dition, another character was added and the plot thickend: Now for those of you planning to join Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane in attending “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s Annual Christmas Party at Jack casino in downtown Cincinnati where she’ll be kicking off her return to politics, let’s all sing the third verse of “Mean Jean’s” Twelve Days of Chrismas, sent in by “Mean Jean’s” former campaign Mangler, Joe “I Managed Scott Croswell’s Failed Campaign, Too” Braun, whose Strauss Troy law firm partners might be celebrating this Christmas if they’re finally been paid for defending “Mean Jean” in Columbus before the Ohio Elections Commission several years ago. It goes something like this:

On the Third Day of Christmas, “Mean Jean” gave to me,
Three Borgman cartoons,
Two red dresses,
And one old crapper, from Rob Portman’s legacy.

But everything changed last night, when Hanukkah Harry delivered proof positive that “Her Meanness” had officially filed the paperwork for her “Schmidt for Ohio” Committee in November while we were all too busy consuming Turkey, and we learned “Mean Jean” Schmidt would officially be kicking off her return to politics at her Annual Christmas Party at Jack casino in downtown Cincinnati.

That fact was promptly included in today’s “Holiday Happenings”:

“MEAN JEAN” SCHMIDT’S CHRISTMAS PARTY: Now for those of you planning to join Outcast Attorney Chris Finney, COAST’s right-wing Chairman Brad Beckett, and Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane at “Mean Jean’s” Annual Christmas Party at Jack casino in downtown Cincinnati kicking off her official return to politics (reported exclusively in last night’s Blower which has yet not been unanimously endorsed by the Clermont County GOP, let’s all sing the fourth verse of “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s Twelve Days of CHRISTmas,” sent in by “TaxKiller Tom” Brinkman, who still claims he did not run down that “Bitch-in-a-Ditch,” at the spot where Union Township officials in Clermont County had erected a special sign for the occasion.

Instead, “TaxKiller Tom” is shown gleefully cutting “Mean Jean’s” head off a cake at the Marie Antoinette “Let ‘Em Eat Cake Awards.” It goes something like this:

On the Fourth Day of CHRISTmas, “Mean Jean” gave to me:
Four Screeching Tires,
Three Borgman cartoons,
Two red dresses,
And one old crapper, from Rob Portman’s legacy.

No wonder everybody hereabouts is now anxiously awaiting to see who’ll soon be included on the Fifth Day of CHRISTmas.

The Whistleblower Newswire Is The Official Publication of Record For The Conservative Agenda

The Blower believes we’re still living during the most important period in American History for our non-stop campaign against Political Correctness, the Devolution of American Culture.

That’s because Mid-Term Elections were a National Election, a referendum on everything Trump has accomplished, and Congress, the Deep State, the Radical Media Establishment will continue to lie and say really stupid things without a smidgen of journalistic integrity in their effort to advance their Radical Leftist Agenda.

Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane Says The Conservative Agenda Is Now Working On Donald Trump’s Sixth 100 Days To Make America Great Again. Today Was Day Number 686 And There Are Now Only 696 More Days Until Trump’s Re-Election Day on November 3, 2020