Special “Best Spring Break Ever” E-dition

TODAY IS
TUESDAY, MARCH 23, 2021
TRUMP’S SIXTY-SECOND DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
This E-dition Has Been Quarantined In The Whistleblower Archives Due To China’s Deadly Kung Flu Virus.
Although Last Year’s “Let’s All Go on Spring Break” Issue Had Been Previously Scheduled For Updating, It Would Have Been Impossible For Our Staff To Edit It Under Current Government Social Distancing Protocols.

Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers    

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image003This year on Spring Break at the Nude Beach in Florida, I’ve been personally working on a list of guys who took their wives and families to the Redneck Riviera, Naples, Destin, or Key Largo, just so they could spend all day on the beach ogling young girls’ breasts. You’ll never guess whose names are already on that list. —Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane

image003Maybe that’s why we chose Robin Williams’ “Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’” Your Quote for Today Committee

image003Are all of my snitches still on Spring Break, too? —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo

image003We’re not on Spring Break. It just always seems that way. —Northern Kentucky Legislators

image005image003Usually it’s a sure sign of spring when UK is playing basketball in the NCAA Tournament while UC and Xavier aren’t. —Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall (Now heard on 220 radio stations, locally 1360)

image003But it’s Spring Break in Florida. The temperature tomorrow in Punta Gorda will be 75 degrees,  teenage tramps will go wild, and thongs are always particularly lovely this time of year. —Frank Weikel

image003Please add Venice, Florida to the list of places The Blower is watching guys who took their wives and teenage children on Spring Break so they can spend all day on the beach ogling young girls’ breasts. —Larry Laptop

image003Here’s a Spring Break Poem: What could be nicer, than a nice set of boobs? A pretty young girlfriend who just tied her tubes. —Odious Octogenarian Bunky Tadwell, The Bard of Cleves

image003image015Did you know some of our smarter phones allow The Blower’s photos to come through? —Barry Blackberry

image003According to my countdown, because next year will be leap year, there will still be 365 more days until the next BB&BJ Day. —Horny in Hebron

image003When does The Blower’s 2019 Girls Gone Wild on Spring Break video come out? —Will “The Thrill” Terwort

image003Where’s our video? —Wilder Women

image003Do they have any videos of women faking it? —Uptight Bitches from Fort Mitchell

image003Does what happens on Spring Break stay on Spring Break? —Political Philanderers

image003Do guys still drink a lot on Spring Break? —Nathan “Cornbread” Smith and Michael Liquid Plummer

image003image016Spring Break is a great way to get a great tan in only one day.—Larry the Loser

image003Do guys get to eat a lot on Spring Break? —Clueless Marc Wilson and Scott “Pass the Biscuits” Kimmich

image003I always used to go “crazy” on Spring Break. —Your Good Friend, Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney E Rob Sanders

image003Come to think of it, maybe that’s what happened to my former patient. —“Crazy Eric’s” Crazy Psychiatrist

image003Trish the Dish claims she still wants to know what BB&BJ stands for. —TV 19 News

image003She really knows, she’s just saying that. — WCPO-TV Helicopter Reporter Dan Carroll (Formerly with TV 19)

image003And if all of that isn’t Newsworthy enough, Geezers looking for Major Yabbos on the beach should check out “The Makeover.” — Our Aging Attorney Acquaintance Still Searching For His Lost Youth And Vigor On Spring Break, Who Just Returned From Naples

image022Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Older Oglers On The Beach.

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           Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer

         image022Sometimes The Blower ridicules old guys who take their wives and children on Spring Break to show that ogling young girls’ breasts on the beach is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a dirty old man.

          This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental, especially Ollie Ogler.

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 SPRING BREAK HOT LINE

e-mail your Major Yabbo sighting photos today.image020

Some Spring Break items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Spring Break Watching subscribers.

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 WHISTLEBLOWER SPRING BREAK VIDEO OF THE DAY

(Possibly sent in by Women’s History Month Faux Facebook Friend Addia Wuchner, Bluegrass State Representative, who doesn’t need a makeover)

image022Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.

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Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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