TODAY IS
THURSDAY, MARCH 04, 2021
TRUMP’S FORTIETH DAY OUT-OF-OFFICE
AND WE ONCE AGAIN HEAR FROM OUR LOCAL POLITICAL JUNKIE WE’LL CALL “CINCY DAVE”

Well, today is inauguration day, the day when Trump will be inaugurated as the 19th president. Yes, the 19th! According to the Q followers, which number in the millions, and include many Republicans and even a couple of House members, Ulysses S. Grant was the last legitimate president, and all the subsequent presidents were illegitimate. (That includes Trump himself, but logic is not the Q’s forte.) Anyway, they are certain that today’s the day, and it will be Trump’s day.

To help celebrate, the Trump National Hotel, a few blocks from the White House, has tripled its rates for March 3rd, 4th, and 5th, which were already significantly higher than other hotels in D.C. The Trump family would never waste a good opportunity to take advantage of true believers. Q followers, however, take the rate increase as proof that Trump will be sworn in today.

No one really knows what will happen on the off-chance that Trump is not inaugurated. Will there be a second Capitol riot? Perhaps the inauguration will be postponed, until like, say, January 20, 2025, or maybe sometime between then and now? Most folks think another inauguration today is unlikely, especially only a month and a half after the last one, but the House is taking no chances, canceling all business for today. The Senate is doing business as usual, so they obviously don’t believe a word of it.
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No word on what precautions former V.P. Mike Pence is taking today, but he should be wary, as he and Nancy Pelosi were on the hit list for the Jan. 6th Putsch. Nancy was supposed to get a bullet to the head, but Mike was scheduled for the much more gruesome fate of death by hanging.
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Thousands of National Guard troops are ready for whatever may happen, be it a riot, insurrection, putsch, or even an inauguration.  

We’ll Probably Still Be OK, Even If The Martians Attack

More Good News And Bad News Next Time