TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2020
TRUMP’S 1404h DAY IN OFFICE
NATIONAL TURKEY FEDERATION INTRODUCES 2020’S NATIONAL THANKSGIVING TURKEYS
Another Reason to Give Thanks Every Day
It’s beginning to look a lot like Thanksgiving,
Ev’rywhere you go;
Visit your Kroger store,
They’ve got turkeys and beer and more,
Think of all your money you could blow.
And while we’re all obsessing over white meat, stuffing, and pumpkin pie, Hurley the Historian says everybody’s still supposed to remember where he was on Sunday at 12:30 p.m. Central Standard Time, when President Kennedy was assassinated. And maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose JFK’s “As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.”
So at today’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders asked Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what he’ll be most grateful for this Thanksgiving, and our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher said, “That’s easy. It’s still got to be The First Amendment, where it says “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”
“Of course, Freedom of Religion is important,” Kane explained, “and so are the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances, but what The Blower is really thankful for not just on this Thanksgiving, but every day for that matter, is our Freedom of Speech, and of the press, and we intend to keep using every bit of our Freedom of Speech, and then some.”
And remembering Eric “Call Me Crazy Deters’ historic, unsuccessful, frivolous fool-for-a-client “SLAPP Suit,” meant to chill The Blower’s Free Speech, nationally known constitutional rights and civil liberties lawyer Scott Greenwood said, “Citizens have a nearly absolute right to criticize public figures without fear that they will be slapped with unnecessary lawsuits. Clearly, Mr. Deters was using the courts to intimidate The Whistleblower and others from speaking out against him. People must not manipulate the courts to silence those whose speech they may not like.”
“Even more importantly, The Whistleblower is a publisher,” Whistleblower Legal Dream Team Chairman Greenwood added. “His work is specifically protected by the First Amendment. As a member of the alternative press, The Whistleblower must have the freedom to publish stories on issues that he believes are valuable to the community. If the alternative media is intimidated from reporting on some stories because of the threat of lawsuits, the risk of corruption grows exponentially.”
Other things for which The Whistleblower is thankful include several thousand Persons of Consequence who’ve applied to receive our not-poorly-written publication every day, and we suppose all those Faux Facebook Friends (before FaceBook disabled our account because they said they didn’t believe Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane was a “real person”) should be added to that list as well.
And what would The Whistleblower ever do without our hundreds of credible news sources? Our Snitches and Bitches are everywhere. Every week our columnists, investigative reporters, Suburban Soreheads, and activists like the C.H. Snitch at 1000 Main Street and guys from Republicans for Higher Taxes come up with news scoops the media is too lazy, too stupid, or too dishonest to report.
And what would The Blower be without our creative contributors who constantly spend so much time and effort doing their part to make The Whistleblower a better publication? Our readers are always amazed at what an asset like Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception comes up with.
Hall of Fame Cartoonist and Illustrator Jerry Dowling’s “Mr. Whistle” was the best single piece of artwork we ever filched, since we use it every day at the beginning of our publication. And these days, both Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception and Photo Shop Spoofer Edward Cropper have really established themselves.
Those whacky guys from “Not the Fishwrap” turned out entertaining videos for years. We hope somehow we can convince them to go back in business.
How thankful are we about all those politicians and characters, providing an eternal source of grist for our mill? And blessings be upon all those Radical Leftists in The Establishment Media, because if any of them were actually doing his (or her) job, there would be no reason for The Blower to exist during the Days of Dishonesty and Division for America following the Dark Ages of the Obama Administration, since the First Black President in History was never impeached, after all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For “Crooked Hillary” in 2016’s Rigged Presidential Election, and get all of their “fake news” from News Liars at The Destroy Trump Media, Like The Ones At The Fishwrap And On Channel 5, 9, 12, And 19, Even After RINOs Tried To Give It All Away By Losing The House Of Representatives In Trump’s 2018 Mid-Term Elections And Dishonest DemocRATS Got Caught Trying To Cheat Once Again in 2020, ensured that the Divided States of America would have a government it truly deserves.
And We Are Especially Thankful for Political Correctness
Whistleblower Indiana Bureau Chief Hoosier Daddy remembers when, according to The Blaze, after the Indianapolis Star published a political cartoon that was decidedly against Obama’s Illegal Executive Amnesty Announcement, the paper’s executive editor Jeff Taylor said many readers were offended and called it “racist.”
So the next day, the Star pulled the political cartoon by Gary Varvel. Taylor said Varvel “did not intend to be racially insensitive in his attempt to express his strong views” about the issue but added that “we erred in publishing it.” Read Indianapolis Star Executive Editor Jeff Taylor’s wimpy ass, PC Apology HERE.
And wouldn’t you know, The PC Indianapolis Star is another PC Gannett Publication, just like The Morning Fishwrap in Cincinnati.
Notice how the second version of the cartoon (during the Age of Obama) showed the illegal immigrant without a mustache, but every other element appeared the same as the first version.
WHICH IS WHY OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE CHOSE
this classic definition of “Political Correctness” by Lt Colonel R. J. Wiedemann, USMC Retired: “Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous Mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.”
Charlton Heston’s “Political correctness is tyranny with manners” wasn’t bad either.
WHISTLEBLOWER TURKEY OF THE YEAR CONTEST
(Sponsored by Dummy’s Restaurant)
Winners will be announced on Thanksgiving.
POLITICALLY INCORRECT THANKSGIVING HOT LINE
E-mail your appreciative approbations today
Some politically incorrect items in today’s Blower were sent in by our politically incorrect subscribers.
WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO OF THE DAY
Let’s All Sing The Trump Song For Thanksgiving
Note: We guarantee iPhone subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.