SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 2018
Are You Ready For Our Boycott
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1932, Governor Franklin D. Roosevelt inaugurated the Winter Olympics at Lake Placid, N.Y.
OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE chose Thomas Sowell’s “WHAT is called Black History Month might more accurately be called “the sins of white people” month. The sins of any branch of the human race are virtually inexhaustible, but the history of blacks in America includes a lot more than the sins of white people, which are put front and center each February.
THE LATEST POLLS: Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says in the past 10 years, the New England Patriots have won two Super Bowls and made it to the big game four times. Perhaps it’s no surprise, then, that nearly half of Americans think the Patriots will win the championship this year. A new Rasmussen Reports national telephone and online survey finds that 46% of American Adults think the Patriots will win Super Bowl LII, while 25% think the Philadelphia Eagles will win. Twenty-nine percent (29%) are not sure.
THURSDAY, OUR LATE NIGHT TV JOKEWATCHER SAID LATE NIGHT COMEDIANS WERE STILL TAKING CHEAP SHOTS AT TRUMP, LIKE JIMMY FALLON’S: Some more news out of Washington. The government is spending $24 million to replace two refrigerators on Air Force One. Until then, they’re keeping perishables cold by putting them between Donald and Melania.
CONAN O’BRIEN: It’s come out that President Trump’s director of communications, Hope Hicks, may have partially obstructed justice. Trump said he’s furious with Hicks because he hired her to fully obstruct justice.
JAMES CORDEN: Today was Groundhog Day, the day where we predict six more weeks of winter if the groundhog sees his shadow. The groundhog has been predicting weather since 1887 and has been wrong 61 percent of the time. And yet, this is still front-page news every year. So I guess fake news isn’t a recent phenomenon. You know that this isn’t actually based on any science, right? And for that reason, Donald Trump has just appointed the groundhog to a special committee on climate change.
SETH MEYERS: The Republican chair of the House Intelligence Committee, Devin Nunes, yesterday claimed the changes made to a controversial memo about the FBI before he sent it to the White House were minor grammatical edits. That’s right. He had to make the grammar worse so Trump could read it.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, The Odious Octegenarian, who says with all those presidential birthdays coming up this month, it’s no coincidence this poem appears in his “Sentimental Poems of Presidential Birthdays,” found in better bookstores everywhere, except in Cleves.
Honesty Might Not Be the Best Policy
They called him “Honest Abe”
He meant just what he said.
But Washington couldn’t handle that
So they shot him in the head.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL: Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible. This week, let’s all re-read the “Schnozzy Heimlich Story.
IN THIS WEEK’S COLUMN FROM PATRONAGE COUNTY TITLED “MISSION IMPOSSIBLE” “President Jimmy Carter called the IM Team to help free those 50 members of the Carter-Mondale Re-election Committee held captive by terrorists for four months in Iran. That op-ed column first appeared in the legendary Mt. Washington Press on March 8, 1980.
MEANWHILE, OUR MUCKRAKER is wondering why the entire Swamp (including the swamp media) kicked and screamed so viciously to prevent the Nunes Memo’s release if there’s “nothing in it.”
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” No. 137 says, “Tell a joke”: Q: How do you starve an Obama supporter? A: Hide his food stamps under his work boots.
GOING GALT means taking the John Galt Pledge. Let’s all say it together: “I swear by my life, and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.”
WHISTLEBLOWER SENIOR BUSINESS EDITOR MERRILL FORBES says this week: Both the House and Senate gathered to hear President Trump’s first State of the Union address. Both chambers also passed legislation to impose new requirements for Olympic sports organizations to prevent and report suspected sexual abuse. Separately, the House passed a defense appropriations bill for fiscal year 2018, while the Senate approved a number of nominations.
Next Week: The House will vote on the Mortgage Choice Act, which will change qualified mortgage rules. The Senate will consider various nominations. Both chambers will also have to act on the fiscal year 2018 government funding bill by Friday or risk another shutdown.
THE FREE GRAIN PARTY still stands as the last refuge of anyone who’s willing to help himself from the stores of others, and Kent Yoshimura says, “Although I’m not a big fan of birthdays, I am totally willing to take full advantage of it.”
Free Grain Party Members include all DemocRATS, RINO Republicans, some TEA Partiers, quite a few Independents, disgruntled postal workers, senior citizens demanding free prescriptions, those who believe bigger government is the answer to all their problems, everybody who said “what Bill Clinton did was indefensible, but he shouldn’t be removed from office,” and those who think pork-barrel spending is OK as long as their district gets the money.
Unfortunately, that group probably doesn’t include all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Failed Trying To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Hillary, and get all of their information from our Obama Supporters in the Press, like the ones at The Fishwrap and on Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.
FINALLY AT SATURDAY’S MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane if Delusional Ohio Republican Governor John Kasich’s used Disingenuous DemocRAT Taking Points for the GOP’s release of that controversial Nunes memo on Friday. “ Ohio has always (last 40 yrs) voted for the Presidential winner by the exact margin that he carried the country, Kane explained. That was until 2016 when Trump carried Ohio by a greater margin than he carried Texas. Trump carried 82 counties…..many that had never voted Republican, much because of the constant attacks from Kasich and the Ohio Republican Party. Doesn’t anybody remember when Ex. Mrs. Matt Borges, then wife of the ORP Chairman, said in an interview that went viral that every time Trump appeared on Television, she wanted to vomit? Each time Kasich and his vicious minions attacked Trump, the Trump margin grew larger. Now, Kasich thinks that by continuing to spout the Pelosi/Schumer line on his weekly trips to Iowa, will cause Americans to make him POTUS. The Blower will take that bet.
Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Hamilton County’s Disingenuous Double-Dipping Democrat Auditor, who still hasn’t explained exactly how his office came up with its Fair Property Values for your Jacked-Up Property Taxes in Anderson, because word around the local real estate offices is that there are still a lot of new inquiries for homes in West Clermont school district. Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception shows us another successful audit.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:
MONDAY (FEBRUARY 5) we’ll be getting ready to celebrate Ronald Reagan’s 108th Birthday by reminding everybody once again what he did to those left-wing agitators at Berkeley.
TUESDAY (FEBRUARY 6) our Real Subscribers will be commenting on what Ohio’s Delusional Republican Governor John Kasich was doing during The Trumpster’s visit to Cincinnati on Monday.
WEDNESDAY, (FEBRUARY 7) The Blower will be checking for more revelations from last Friday’s FISA Memo.
THURSDAY (FEBRUARY 8) we’ll be catching up on Black Lives Really, Really Matter History Month, and checking all those white people’s “Guilt Indexes.”
THE FIRST LINE OF FRIDAY’S (FEBRUARY 9) LIMERICK IS: “When The Auditor Jacks Up Your Taxes.”
AND SATURDAY (FEBRUARY 10) we’ll see if the Senate Judiciary Committee gets its FBI, DOJ Bashing Memo declassified, after seeing how much the vermin were squirmin’ after the Nunes released the House Blockbuster Memo last Friday.
Plagiarism Count: Unattributed material was filched from a mere 742 different websites for the production of today’s Blower, many of our filches were from our friends at Weasel Zippers.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political score-keeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political score-keeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Tonight’s Whistleblower Video
20,000 Calorie Superbowl Challenge (Wings, Doritos, Pizza…)
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