Daily Archives: October 12, 2017

Special “Locker Room Banter” E-dition


image009This Time Last Year…
Our Political Junkie We’ll Call “Cincy Dave” was telling us there were only 26 more days until Election Day (see that E-dition HERE) and while everybody was really busy watching all that fake outrage the Liberal Media Conspiracy Hypocrisy had generated over Donald Trump’s Sex Talk Tapes, The Blower was busy trying to explain the meaning of “Locker Room Banter.”

Thank Heavens Trump Didn’t Use the “C-Word”
image005At this morning’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about the way Members Of The Liberal Media Conspiracy don’t seem to understand the meaning of “Locker Room Banter” these days, you know, those locker-room jokes and rude sexual remarks that men are thought to enjoy when they are in the company other men and no women can hear what they’re saying.

image006Or maybe they really do understand about “guy talk,” and Hillary’s Harpies are only using those vile-and-disgusting words uttered in 2005 to bash Donald Trump, while ignoring each and every one of Hillary’s crimes and scandals during the past 30 years. Curiously, Pussy-Whipped Politicians like Portman and Kasich would find locker room banter more offensive than adult males showering with young girls in their locker room.

Or maybe our Liberal Media Conspirators are just trying to fool all those Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put The Positively Worst President in History In The White House—Twice, and Now Plan To Give Obama a Third Term By Voting For Crooked Hillary, And Get All Of Their “Fake News” From Our Obama Supporters In The Press, Like The Ones At The Fishwrap, And On Channel 5, 9, 12, and 19.

image007“Actually, as any graduate of the Failed Cincinnati Public Schools can tell you, “Locker Room Banter” is right there in the Declaration of Independence,” Kane added, because Thomas Jefferson wrote, “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Pussy.”

image026And even the Pledge of Allegiance says, “One nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and Pussy for all.”

image026Do you remember when Patrick Henry said, “Give me Pussy or give me a death?”

image026Nathan Hale said, “I regret that I have but one Life to give to chasing Pussy.”

image026John Paul Jones said, “I have not yet begun to Fight For Pussy.”

image026George Washington said, “I cannot tell a lie. It was only Pussy that made me cut down the cherry tree.”

image026Samuel Adams said, “Someday they’ll name a beer after me, and when they do, I’ll be grabbing Pussy.”

image026Daniel Webster said, “One country, one constitution, one destiny, and hours of Pussy.”

image026At Gettysburg, Abraham Lincoln said, “The world will little note nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget Pussy.”

image026William Tecumseh Sherman said, “War is hell– without Pussy.”

image026George Armstrong Custer said, “Where in the hell did all that Pussy come from?”

image026Woodrow Wilson said, “The world must be made safe for Pussy.”

image026Will Rogers said, “I never met a Pussy I didn’t like.”

image026General George S. Patton said, “No bastard ever won a war dying for his Pussy. He won it by making the other poor bastard die for his Pussy.”

image026FDR said, “We have nothing to fear but Pussy itself.”

image026Douglas McArthur said, “I shall return– for Pussy.”

image026Harry Truman said, “The Locker Room Banter stops here.”

image026Dwight D. Eisenhower said, “I think that people want Pussy so much that one of these days government had better get out of their way and let them have it.”

image026Albert Einstein said, “”The hardest thing in the world to understand is Pussy.”

image026Sigmund Freud said, “Most of men’s problems can be traced to their subconscious feelings about Pussy.”

image026John Kennedy said, “Ask not what you can do for your Pussy.”

image026Neil Armstrong said, “A small step for man, one giant step for Pussy.

image026Barry Goldwater said, “Extremism in the defense of Pussy is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of Pussy is no virtue.”

image026Vince Lombardi said, “Locker Room Banter isn’t everything.”

image026Ronald Reagan said, “My fellow Americans. I’m pleased to announce that I’ve signed legislation outlawing Pussy in Russia. The bombing starts in five minutes.”

image026John Wayne said, “Sure Women have the right to work wherever they want, as long as they have your dinner ready when you get home along with a big helping of Pussy for dessert.”

image026Rev. Martin Luther King said, “I had a dream about Pussy.”

image026Bill Clinton said “Nobody ask if I ate her Pussy.”

image026Charlton Heston said, “Let my Pussy go.”

image026At every patriotic rally, Lee Greenwood always sings, “God Bless Pussy.”

image026George W. Bush said, “Pussy Accomplished.”

image026Not to be outdone, Obama now still insists that only Mean-Spirited Republicans would ever mention Pussy.

image026And Donald Trump says, “You should hear what Bill Clinton told me about Hillary eating Pussy.image003

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Some Locker Room Banter items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Locker Room Banter subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.image003 image008