Daily Archives: August 3, 2012

Special “Chick-Fil-A Analysis” E-dition

Friday, August 3, 2012

It’s Getting to Feel Like 2010 All Over Again!

  • Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Obama Supporters in the Press couldn’t say enough about audience reaction to Obama’s Class Warfare Speeches in Ohio. It must’ve been a whole lot more newsworthy than those few Romney supporters who stood in line throughout the day to buy chicken sandwiches and waffle fries at 1,600 Chick Fil A restaurants across the country to celebrate “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day.” Now if only all those people remember to put a Romney for President sign in their front yards and show up at the polls in “94” more days.
  • Wednesday seemed like the 2012 mid-term elections all over again. Do you think the majority of Americans are just sick of having the radical gay agenda rubbed in their faces? Maybe they’re just tired of being flogged as “extremists,” “homophobes,” “haters,” and “bigots” for simply affirming traditional marriage. Eating at Chick-Fil-A may have been a good way to stick it in the eye of the left-wingers who won’t accept that the rest of us simply don’t agree with them on cultural issues. It’s something new— it’s called Freedom of Speech.
  • Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Ronald Reagan’s “Sometimes I can’t help but feel the First Amendment is being turned on its head.”
  • In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says according to the Cleveland Pain Dealer, D-RATS got all bent out of shape after Governor Kasich’s communications team used Twitter to rip Obama’s Economy before his over-taxed payer funded campaign speeches in Ohio on Wednesday.

The Tweet reads: “On the occasion of the President’s latest visit to Ohio, we have a question for him.” A link in the tweet then takes followers to a graphic noting Ohio’s improving economic outlook. For months, Disingenuous DemocRATS have argued that Ohio’s success is attributable to the president’s leadership while Republicans have credited Kasich.

The Twitter graphic asked: “If the President’s policies are behind Ohio’s success, why is the rest of the country trailing us?” Are the Republicans getting better at this campaigning stuff or what!

  • Our Compassionate Conservative says as a record number of Americans headed to Chick-fil-A to celebrate traditional marriage and their free speech rights, some liberal leaders were still busy showing their tolerance – by trying to shut down anyone who disagrees with them. The liberal DemocRAT Speaker of the New York City Council, Christine Quinn, sent a letter using her official title asking the President of New York University to expel Chick-fil-A immediately from their city campus because she disagrees with their CEO on gay marriage. Previously, tolerant liberal Speaker Quinn has tried to inhibit the political speech of pro-life groups and shut down pro-life clinics. Nothing demonstrates Liberal tolerance like their trying to destroy anyone for the crime of having a different opinion.
  • Republicans for Higher Taxes remind us that RINO Party Executive Director Ashwin Corattiyil worked for Speaker Quinn through August 2010 and Ashwin refers to her as Ashwin’s political mentor. This is the guy Hamilton County RINO Party Boss Alex T is trusting to run the party’s vital 2012 effort. We suspect most Republicans and “Tea Party” activists will continue to shut up and do what they’re told, without a care in the world that Alex’s DemocRAT Errand Boy is in prime position to sabotage the party on every occasion.
  • Just one day before their 5th Anniversary, Republicans for Higher Taxes investigated the Chris Seelbach “assault” and named the attacker. It was a member of COAST and the Tea Party who eats dinner at Chick-fil-A!
  • And what was former campaign mangler to “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup doing at the law office of Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka Wednesday night? His buddies at COAST hope he wasn’t there airing dirty secrets from Bronze Star’s closet.

  • And in a related item, who do you suppose posted that YouTube Video asking if Brad Wenstrup has a secret? It’s just the sort of dirty, nasty, underhanded, totally unsubstantiated smear job right out of the Larry Flynt Playbook The Blower was warning against back in March, right after “Bronze Star Brad’s” stunning surprise primary victory over “Mean Jean” Schmidt when we tried to be oh-so-subtle when we suggested our war hero get his media relations under control.
  • Something else we thought we’d hear about a lot sooner was Cincinnati’s Clown-cil Gay Chris Squeal-Back’s proclivity for grabbing guys’ asses and making lewd comments in restaurants, according to police reports.
  • Also at the City Hall Circus, after yesterday’s vote to put doubling our Nine Fine Clown’s terms from two years to four, did our Girly Mayor Mark Mallory really reminded our Nine Fine Clowns that if they want to lobby for or against the idea, they shouldn’t use city resources to do so? The Blower wonders if Mallory was looking straight at Laure “Not So” Cleanlivin when he said that.
  • Obsessive Obama Supporters Tom and Rose say yesterday’s fund-raising e-mail from the Obama Re-election Campaign at the White House, told supporters instead of buying your friend a drink— they should each pitch in $5 before midnight to help Obama’s campaign win. Today’s fund-raising pitch was instead of taking the kids to a Reds game, send him $54 and watch it on TV.
  • Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1492 the Santa Maria, Pinta, and Nina set sail for America, but it wasn’t till many years later that Liberals would be blaming Columbus personally for everything bad that was to happen in this country until they began to blame George W. Bush.
  • And guess who’s waiting to congratulate our Olympic medal winners to return from London? Along with the medallions, there are also cash awards (Gold=$25,000, Silver=$15,000, and Bronze=$10,000) and Obama’s IRS agents wants to make sure these athletes who didn’t do it on their own pay their fair share.
  • Lockland superintendent’s biggest mistake was not getting advice from Anthony Smiff, FCPS Director of Schools, as to how he got away with cheating when he was principal of Taft High School.
  • Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says just as the The Blower exclusively reported yesterday after Kentucky’s Fourth District Congressman Goof Doofus would not be missed after he announced his immediate retirement on Tuesday, sure enough, our Feckless Fishwrappers followed up with how well that office was functioning in his absence.
  • The answer to that conundrum over in Hee-Haw land about what to do now that Goof Doofus has left the building was answered for Ohio long ago in a case won by ACLU Mouthpiece and Chairman of The Blower’s Legal Dream Team Scott Greenwood. Under ACLU v. Taft (remember that disgrace of a governor?), the governor can’t simply name a replacement, and has no discretion whether to call an election. It’s mandatory.
  • Finally, Political Insiders at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda were asking Charles Foster Kane if it was merely a coincidence that Reds Broadcaster Marty Brennaman was having his head shaved at Great American Ball Park tonight at the same time Horny Homos will be showing up at each of of the 1,600 Chick Fil-A restaurants across America for their National Same Sex Spit Swapping Day Protest to celebrate their intolerance of Freedom of Speech they don’t like.

“They should have combined the event,” our Beloved Whistleblower explained.

REMEMBER: If you can’t improve on the news, you shouldn’t even be reporting it.


Stories We’re Working On

  • Jobless claims surge (unexpectedly again, claims Obama)
  • Stocks tumble
  • IRS pays out billions in fraudulent refunds
  • Government Motors profits plunge 42%
  • Harry Reid says Romney is guilty of tax evasion until he proves he isn’t
  • Goof Doofus is still resigned
  • Obama says, “Give me four more years!”

Whistleblower Web Poll

This week, here’s why the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said so many Real Americans showed up at Chick Fil A yesterday:
(A) They liked standing in lines: 2%
(B) To support Free Speech and Traditional Marriage: 1%
(C) All that talk about gay sex made them hungry for a chicken sandwich: 1%
(D) Somebody else was buying: 96%

Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!


Who Says Politics and Olympics Don’t Mix?

This week, everybody who thinks the Opening Ceremonies of the 2012 Olympics in London were the worst he’s ever seen, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.

The winner former Gold Medal Winner Turned Sportscaster Louganis Spitz, says it’s a good thing the Olympics only comes once every four years like the US Presidential Elections.

Louganis wins front row seats for every one of the women’s beach volleyball games, dirty Twitters from Greek triple jumper Voula Papachristou, and tickets for Obama’s Olympics in Chicago in 2016, in case the IOC changes its mind. His winning limerick is:

How about a political Olympics event,
Explaining how our money was misspent.
To win medals of gold,
Politicians you’d behold,
Trying to swim with their feet in cement.

And from the Anderson Laureate (who’s still not successfully completed his racial sensitivity correspondence course),

How about a political Olympics event,
Featuring a man of Afro-Hawaiian descent?
It could be “Marathon BS-ing”,
With a TON of window dressing,
And a whole bunch of messianic intent!

How about a political Olympics event?
Where candidates can explain what they meant
When they pull a gaffe from their hat,
Like Obama’s “You didn’t build that”,
He’s lucky the White House doesn’t charge rent.

There’d be a medal for the biggest lie ever told
And we’d have to award Barack the gold
Silver would go to Jay Cardboard
Bronze would be Pelosi’s award
And Clinton’s “I did not have sex” would win “Most Bold.”

The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“Who’ll Be Mitt Romney’s Vice Presidential Selection”


POLITICAL OLYMPICS HOT LINE

E-mail your best events today.

Some political games items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political games playing subscribers.


Link of the Day

Get Out

    Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here