The Whistleblower Newswire | Some of the News They Seem to Lose
Special “More Politics As Usual” E-dition
Most People Just Want It To Be Over!
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers
During the 2012 Olympics in London, please don’t remind voters how Obama was humiliated in 2009 when Olympics Officials “just said no” after he and Michelle demanded the 2016 O-lympics be given to Chicago. —Obama Supporters in the Press
Obama’s failure to grab the gold in his personal quest to send the 2016 Olympics to Chicago was a stunning setback for a president who had until then enjoyed a pop star reception abroad. —Fox News
Obama’s arrogance turned off the IOC. —The Danish News
Obama’s rejection on the world stage because he failed to bring the 2016 Olympics to Chicago will be nothing compared to the pain he feels when the polls close in “97” more days. —Mitt Romney, from his unprecedented fund-raiser in Israel
How’s this for campaign strategy: The White House just told us to call Romney a “Wimp.” —Newsweak Magazine
Even as the U.S. National Debt approached $16 Trillion, House Republicans have no plans to move forward this week on a catch-all spending bill to avert the government shutdown. Congress will instead leave town for a five-week recess without voting on a continuing resolution or even introducing it. —GOP House Speaker John Boehner
On this date in 1975, Teamsters Union Goon Jimmy Hoffa went missing, but he’s still registered as a DemocRAT. — Hurley the Historian
That’s why we chose Dave Barry’s “Florida’s number three industry, behind tourism and skin cancer, is voter fraud.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
Just like everywhere else in the country, Disgruntled DemocRATS are less enthusiastic about voting this year. —Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders
Even though we already spend more per student than 98% of Ohio’s school districts, we are in violation of Ohio law by having six schools that have failed to submit the required safety plans and floor plans that would help emergency personnel in a school emergency. If only we had even more money. —Princeton School Board
We believe this calls for the under-taxed residents of the Princeton School District to pass another big property tax increase. —Republicans for Higher Taxes
We would be happy to endorse another big property tax hike. —2008 Tax Hiker of the Year Virg “the Scourge” Lovitt and “Royal Doyle” Webster
I’ll also endorse another property tax just like I endorsed the last two. Say, is there any correlation between all these property tax hikes I’ve been endorsing and the fact 2/3 of the building I “manage” is vacant? —Julie “Campaign Expert” Matheny
When we say we’re going to consider “merit pay increases” for top employees, will that include unqualified political hack soon-to-be ex wives of party chairmen like Jennifer Triantafilou who are incapable of performing their jobs at all? —Greed Township Trustees
I can’t wait for Republicans for Higher Taxes to write more about my long-time support for the Cincinnati streetcar project!” —Sean Donovan
It’s a good thing the Reds didn’t win 20 games in a row, or I’d have to let the Ghost of Marge Schott shave my balls. —Marty Brennaman
Please don’t ask how much I’m still ranking in from my 2012 Olympics scam. —Nick Vehr
Tomorrow will be “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day,” and in Cincinnati everybody’s wondering when Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory will be calling his Extreme Liberal Clown-cil back into session to pass a resolution to ban Chick-Fil-A from opening up any more restaurants within the city limits, especially after a few other gay-loving Liberal Big City Mayors threw a hissy fit when the restaurant’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage.” —Gay Wads at City Hall
We used to think all Liberals supported the First Amendment. We must’ve been wrong. —First Amendment Attorneys
I can’t wait to try Chick-Fil-A’s new homophobic sandwich, when its “Queer-Hatin” Cordon Bleu’ goes on sale. —Phil Burr-Ass, the Queen City’s Homo Hater in Chief
If it’s too crowded to get into the Chick-Fil-A in Anderson tomorrow, would it be OK just to masturbate in the parking lot? —Anderson Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien
Are the only two Chick-Fil-A locations in Northern Kentucky on Houston Road in Florence and at the Airport? —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
Don’t forget, the same-sex kiss-in protest is scheduled for Friday. —Whistleblower Alternate Life-Styles Contributors Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis
Sarah Palin likes Chick-Fil-A. —Northern Kentucky Tea Partiers
We wish we had a Chick-Fil-A so we could boycott it. —Gay Students at NKU
I like watching Lesbians make out. —Horny in Hebron
Trish the Dish says the chicken tasted better before she knew it was basted in hate and homophobia. —Channel 19 News
Sheree Paolello says the Waffle Potato Fries at Chick-Fil-A are really delicious.—Jack Atherton
—Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer —
Sometimes The Blower makes fun of political boycotts to show that trying to ruin somebody’s business is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who has figured out that political boycotts just don’t work.
This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental, especially people who publicly join a boycott just for the publicity.
LIBERAL TOLERANCE HOT LINE
e-mail your egregious examples today.
Some Obama Campaign Bashing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Obama Campaign Bashing subscribers, but we could always use more.
Link of the Day
Obama Promised In 2008 He Would Not Run Negative Ads
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Obama Supporters in the Press could hardly contain their glee over what was supposedly Mitt Romney’s big gaffe Wednesday night. The presumptive Republican presidential candidate made the mistake of telling the truth about well-known preparedness concerns for the 2012 Olympics, Obama pal UK Prime Minister David Cameron and London Mayor Boris Johnson couldn’t wait to slam Romney, the British press chimed in calling our next president “Mitt the Twit,” and the 2012 Political Olympics in London had officially begun. Hurley the Historian said it was the biggest American Insult since the War of 1812.
And wasn’t it funny when Liberal Commentators back home continued their Mitt-picking and British Guy Piers Morgan said he thought Romney was absolutely right. CNN’s new Larry King explained, “It’s no secret over here that for the last three weeks the security around the Olympics has been a shambles.” No wonder Jim Walton, the long-time President of CNN Worldwide, says he will leave the company at the end of the year.
It’s a good thing Romney wasn’t asked his opinion about the Brits’ $43.2 million Opening Ceremonies that couldn’t suck enough and turned out to be nothing more than an Ode to Socialize Medicine.
And how about that outrageous Olympic Attack Ad the Obama campaign unleashed on Romney on the day he left for the Olympics. It called attention to places the Obama campaign claims Romney stashed cash and outsourced jobs around the globe. The ad was so offensive, it’s no wonder Olympic officials banned it. But get used to it, Sleaze Fans. Obama’s re-election campaign still has “98” more days to go.
Friday night, the Obama campaign ran this phony baloney “I Believe” class warfare ad during the opening ceremonies of the Olympics.
No wonder the White House Press Corps rolled their eyes when Obama’s $172,000 per year Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard claimed he heard Obama saying “I love the Olympics, I can’t wait for the Olympics to start.”
The Blower is still waiting for somebody in the Lame-Stream Media to recall the story about Obama’s humiliating defeat when he spent all that time and over-taxed payers’ money groveling before the Olympic Committee trying to bring the 2016 Olympics to Chicago.[SEE OBAMA’S PERSONAL PLEA HERE]
On October 5, 2009 in our Special “Agony of O-lympic Defeat” E-dition, The Blower described Obama’s “Failure of Olympic Proportions,” as ABC’s Charlie Gibson went to Chicago for Obama’s “Crushing’” Olympic Defeat, and the Obama Suck-up called it a real “Kick in the Pants” for Obama.
What a bummer that was for Obama. Those of us following Obama’s Permanent Campaign at Over-Taxed Payers’ Expense Every Day Since His Inauguration recognized the 2016 O-lympics in Chicago as a great kickoff for his “Historic Third Term.” Do you think Obama’s“Special Olympics Joke” on Jay Leno helped America’s cause?
According to Fox News, Obama’s failure to grab the gold in his personal quest to send the 2016 Olympics to Chicago was a stunning setback for a president who had until then enjoyed a pop star reception abroad.
But Obama’s stumble cost him more than the $1.2 million of over-taxed payer’s money to make the overnight dash from Washington to Copenhagen. Obama and first lady Michelle Obama risked their political capital and the prestige of the presidency on an enormous Olympic campaign that resulted in an early exit for Chicago and the top prize going to Rio de Janeiro.
The Danish News said, “Obama’s Arrogance Turned Off IOC.” No wonder when Karl Rove was asked to comment on Obama’s Olympic Failure, Dubya’s former Chief of Staff said, “Obama got what he deserved,”even as Liberals blamed George W. Bush.
Now The Blower says Obama’s rejection on the world stage because he failed to bring the 2016 Olympics to Chicago will be nothing compared to the pain he feels when the polls close on Election Day
Closer to home, The Blower remembers all those gullible donors who pissed their money away on Nick Vehr’s failed wet dream to bring the 2012 Olympics to Cincinnati.
OBAMA’S O-LYMPIC DEFEAT HOT LINE
e-mail your best shots today.
Some gold medal items in today’s Blowerwere sent in by our equally gold medal subscribers.
Link of the Day
Obama got jack squat for Chicago and the Olympics
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
OUR NUMBER ONE STORY THIS WEEK was on the eve of a week-long trip abroad meant to demonstrate his command of foreign policy issues, Mitt Romney blasted Obama’s handling of the U.S. alliance with Israel, his efforts to stop Iran’s nuclear bomb capabilities, and his handling of national security secrets. Chiming in with a timely blog entry, Congressman Steve Chabothead wrote about foreign policy Wednesday, calling Obama every bit as disastrous on the international scene as he has been on the domestic front. But isn’t that what Congressmen are supposed to do? Somebody ought to remind Alex T.’s hand-picked campaign mangler on “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s campaign.
OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEKwas how dull and boring those $42.3 million 2012 Olympics Opening Ceremonies turned out to be. SB Nation writes: It’s hard to imagine the Brits would outdo the Canadians for “worst opening ceremony in memory,” but they found a way to do it. Slow, boring, disjointed, everyone at my viewing party was left yawning and we eventually were forced into a game of “Wits and Wagers” to keep from falling asleep.
Not only that, in this week’s Whistleblower Web Poll, the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said most people won’t be watching the 2012 Olympics in London:
(A) Too cold for women’s beach volleyball bikinis: 2% (B) Can’t understand the language: 1% (C) Reds have won seven straight: 1% (D) Not enough coverage on TV: 96%
Worst of all, the Twitter Olympics had hardly begun, and Greek triple jumper Voula Papachristou was expelled for her Twitter posts commenting on African immigrants (“So many Africans in Greece at least West Nile mosquitoes will eat homemade food”) and expressing support for a far-right party. Voula will really be missed. Our Good Friend Booby Leach says he’d like to triple jump her.
AND OUR NUMBER THREE STORY THIS WEEK was Back home, Liberals just couldn’t stop whining about Chick-Fil-A restaurants after the company’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage.”
Liberals just couldn’t stop whining about Chick-Fil-A restaurants after the company’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage.” Left-wing Lunatic Roseanne Barr even went postal when she wished everybody who at Chick-Fil-A got cancer. Maybe that’s why Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception says, “How would you like to see this Chick Fil A’d?” For the location of the nearest Chick-Fil-A, CLICK HERE.
In Cincinnati, everybody’s wondering when Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory will be calling his Extreme Liberal Clown-cil back into session to pass a resolution to ban Chick-Fil-A from opening up any more restaurants within the city limits, after other gay-loving Liberal Big City Mayors got all bent out of shape when the company’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage” last week. We used to think all Liberals supported the First Amendment. We must’ve been wrong.
Now with some breaking news from “The Onion”: Chick-Fil-A will be debuting its New Homophobic Sandwich when its “Queer-Hatin” Cordon Bleu’ goes on sale.
MONDAY in our Another “Mourning in America” E-dition,The Blower said this time, it was for the largest mass shooting in U.S. History.
Is it just us, or does it seem as if Disingenuous DemocRATS and their willing accomplices in the Liberal News Media always exploiting Death, Tragedy, and Crisis for Political Gain?
Their views on religion, global warming, women’s rights, gay rights, minority equality, abortion, gun control, the death penalty, evolution, consumerism, corporate influence, the poor, the middle class, the wealthy, and patriotism are well known, and whenever something bad happens, Liberals can hardly wait to use that event to divide our nation and advance their ideology.
Maybe that’s why nobody was really surprised at Saturday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda when Political Insiders asked Political Insiders asked Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane how long it would be before Obama would being to exploit the Midnight Movie Massacre in Colorado.
TUESDAY in our Special “Campaign Resumes” E-dition,The Blower said, “Gentlemen, restart your acrimonious attacks!” and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
Was I wrong not to say anything bad about Obama on Sunday while the Mourner-in-Chief was pandering for votes following the Batman Movie Shooting in Colorado? —Mitt Romney
Obama’s Aurora appearance offered us another wonderful opportunity to present him as a healing unifier, while we continue to wage our slash and burn campaign featuring unsubstantiated charges against Mitt Romney, warfare, and charges of racism. —Team Obama
Why would anybody say Disingenuous DemocRATS are always exploitingDeath, Tragedy, and Crisis for Political Gain? —Their Willing Accomplices in the Liberal News Media
Now, during Obama’s “historic” presidency, we have the largest mass shooting in U.S. History. —Charles Manson
And we did our best to blame the Tea Party. —ABC’s Cracked Brian Ross and George Stephanopoulos
It’s not as if Obama hasn’t played politics with shooting victims before, except if you count his shamelessly exploiting the Death of Trayvon Martin, the Virginia Tech tragedy, and the shooting of Arizona Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. —Hurley the Historian
WEDNESDAY in our Special “Insanity Defense” E-dition,The Blower said, “Only His Hairdresser Knows For Sure?”
Noted Legal Scholar Napolitano Tadwell said following recent events, what everyone seems to forget about Obama’s attack on success is that it isn’t just a tool to deny successful people the credit they deserve, it also allows some people to escape responsibility for their failures, especially since Movie Murderer James Holmes received a $26,000 federal grant from the National Institutes of Health.
Also at Obama’s photo op to exploit the Colorado Movie Massacre, there were no calls for “civility” after this murderous mayhem like there were in after DemocRAT Congresswoman Gabby Giffords was shot in Arizona. What a difference a re-election campaign makes. Today, with only “103” more days until the November Elections, our DC Newsbreaker says White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard has had nothing to say about the need for Washington to set an example of “civility” because America’s Source of Incivility is sitting in the White House.
THURSDAY, in our Special “Healing for Dollars” E-dition,The Blower said today Cincinnati had another reason to be proud:
Monday, The Fishwrap featured a photo essay gallery of readers’ choices for the Top Ten Events they’d like to see in Cincinnati. First Choice by far was Major League Baseball’s All Star Game with 653 votes.
Curiously not included was yesterday’s Racial Racketeering Road Show featuring Al Sharpton and Trayvon Martin’s Headline-Hunting, Settlement-Seeking, Obama-Supporting, Unmarried Parents showed up at the Duke Energy Convention Center’s Grand Ballroom. Costs to attend were only $250 for adults and $50 for students. Did Cincinnati’s Girly Mayor Mark Mallory wear his hoodie? Couldn’t you just feel all that Racial Healing going on?
FRIDAY in our Official “Ignoring the 2012 Olympics” E-dition,The Blower was just waiting for Women’s Beach Volleyball to begin:
Presumptive Republican Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney began his a weeklong trip to Britain, Israel, and Poland, to meet with leaders of some of America’s allies who’ve received some really shabby and offensive treatment from the Obama Administration. Amazingly, Romney hasn’t bowed to a single foreign leader yet.
If Obama wants an Olympic Gold Medal, like his bogus Nobel Peace Prize, maybe he can retrieve Muhammad Ali’s that he threw into the Ohio River in the 1960s.
SATURDAY in our Special “Obama’s Gaffes Scorecard” E-dition,The Blower said, “It’s too bad gaffes aren’t an Olympics Event!”
At yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane what were the three biggest gaffes Obama’s made lately.
“That’s easy,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, as he checked his Obama Gaffe Scorecard. “On June 8, Obama said ‘The truth of the matter is that, as I said, we created 4.3 million jobs over the last 27 months, over 800,000 just this year alone. The private sector is doing fine.’
On July 13, Obama said, ‘If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen.’
And on July 24, Obama said ‘Just like we’ve tried their plan, we tried our plan — and it worked.’ Ever since Obama’s been weaning himself off his teleprompter, he’s really been on a roll. In fact, he’s beginning to sound a lot like Vice President Biden lately.”
Now Political Photo-Shopper Edward Cropper shows us how well Obama’s plan worked.
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
PRESIDENTIAL POLITICS 2012:After watching Obama’s national debt skyrocket, it’s not surprising that his campaign is operating in a similar fashion. Reports that Team Obama raised less than they spent in June is the kind of economics we’ve come to expect from this president and his cronies. We’ve also come to expect that his obscenely expensive ideas, always financed with other people’s money, always fail miserably. That’s probably why Michelle Obama’s campaign stops in Dayton and Columbus on Tuesday had so little impact all over the country, except in The Fishwrap.
Before leaving for Europe, NBC’s Brian Williams asked Romney if he planned to pick an incredibly boring white guy for VP, and Romney quipped, “You told me you were not available.” Meanwhile, with Obama is still jetting around to campaign events on Air Force One making statements like, “Our union may not be perfect, but it is perfectible,” whatever the hell that’s supposed to mean. No wonder Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says voters trust Romney more than Obama on the Economy 49%-43%.
OHIO RINO PARTY:In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chef Gerry Manders reported Ohio Republican Party Chairman Boob Bennett issued the following statement on Friday’s dismal gross domestic product (GDP) numbers: “Under the Obama economy anemic economic growth continues. The latest GDP report is another reminder that President Obama’s economic policies are failing America’s working families.
THE LATEST POLLS:Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says during this past week, Mitt Romney opened his biggest lead in over a month over President Obama. During the same week, consumer confidence fell to the lowest level of 2012. It’s no coincidence that they happened during the same week.
OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Jimmy Kimmel’s “At the Beijing Olympics in 2008, they handed out 100,000 condoms. This year it’s 150,000. That’s 100,000 for the U.S. basketball team and 50,000 for everyone else.”
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1981 Prince Charles married Lady Di. Why didn’t we see that reenactment as part of Friday night’s Opening Ceremonies from the 2012 Olympics in London?
OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE: chose Prince Charles’ “Do you seriously expect me to be the first Prince of Wales in history not to have a mistress?”
VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo heard drug money has been funding voter fraud in Clay County, Kentucky. The good news is, it’s bi-partisan. According to Fox News, more than $400,000, part of it drug proceeds, was pooled by DemocRAT and Republican politicians over several elections, and spent to buy the votes of more than 8,000 voters, usually at $50 apiece. One voter was even able to bid up the cost of his vote to $800. Meanwhile, Congressman Goof Doofus wonders, “How come Clay County isn’t in my district?”
THUGS ‘R US: AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka says he fears Republicans will do to labor unions at a national level what they’ve sought achieve in the states, if Mitt Romney wins the presidency and the GOP control Congress come next January. What was his first clue.
HAMILTON COUNTY RINO PARTY: According to their Facebook page, 699 people like the Hamilton County RINO Party. So how come it’s so hard to get volunteers to make phone calls?
MEDIA MENDACITY:According to Scott Whitlock at “Newsbusters,” the same networks that hyped a “humiliating” “fiasco” leading up to the 2012 Olympic games have now turned around and mocked Republican “Mitt the Twit” Romney for pointing out the same thing. NBC’s Today, ABC’s Good Morning America and CBS This Morning all played up comments by the presidential candidate questioning “disconcerting” problems leading up to Friday’s opening ceremonies (the same problems they were previously pointing out).
LIBERAL LUNACY:In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #217 says ask them to guess who said this: “The soundest way to raise revenues in the long run is to cut taxes now. The purpose of cutting taxes now is… to achieve the more prosperous, expanding economy which can bring a budget surplus.” Ronald Reagan? One of the Bushes? F. A. Hayek? Arthur Laffer? No, it was JFK.
DELUSIONAL DEMOCRATS: House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi said she believes Republican Jews are “being exploited.” Is that because if Jews don’t mindlessly vote DemocRAT, they’re being manipulated?
MORE FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERY: Did The Blower happen to mention Skaggie Maggie is raising prices?
RACIAL HEALING UPDATE:Wednesday, the Chicago Teachers Union Chief blamed “lower-class” black students for their poor teaching record, and in our DemocRAT Voter Fraud Update, according to a two week sampling of voter registrations in Galveston County, Texas, 47% of all NAACP voter registrations were definably suspicious, if not fraudulent.
LEGAL BRIEFS: Prosecutors on Friday released a text message that ex-Bun-Gals cheerleader and former teacher Sarah Jones allegedly sent to a former student she’s accused of having sex with. Special prosecutor Sara Farmer filed a motion in response to Jones’ attorney “Crazy Eric” Deters who claimed police “acted with reckless disregard for the truth” and that the case is based on false statements. Farmer is trying the case after our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney Rob Sanders recused himself from the case because after kicking “Crazy Eric’s” Ass all those times, The Robster decided to let somebody else have the fun this time.
HOW ABOUT DEM REDS: Typical Reds’ Rooter Farley Fairweather says he plans to watch Dusty’s boys instead of the Olympics, as long as they’re still in first place.
THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower):Police Chief James Craig knew before he was hired last summer the state of Ohio would require him to take the state peace officer exam to earn full police powers. Craig even signed his name to a state document on July 13, 2011, indicating he understood the state requirement. Now Craig says he “misunderstood” the meaning of that state document. Does Craig have a learning problem, too?
CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET: The Fishwrap made a BFD about Discouraged DemocRAT Odd Todd Opportune’s vital testimony on sewers before a House subcommittee in Washington. There must;ve been 87 people in that group scheduled to “testify.” The Blower hopes Hamilton County Over-taxed Payers got their money’s worth.
IN ANDERSON:Everybody’s waiting to see if Township Dis-Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien still actually entered the Anderson’s Got Talent competition doing his now famous “Choking the Chicken” Act. Cell phone photos would be most helpful.
SOREHEADS IN THE SUBURBS: Are wondering when the folks at 8240 Clara Avenue will be having a big grand opening party for the new Romney Victory Center in Colerain? There’s something else the Hamilton County RINO Party forgot to publicize.
OHIO’S SECOND CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT: This week, The Fishwrap couldn’t stop whining about the fact that our Lame-Duck, Corrupt, Evicted, Lying, Plagiarizing, Meddling, Overblown, Bought-and-paid-For, Tax-and-Spend, Wrinkle-Puss RINO Bitch-in-a-Ditch would not agree to be interviewed.Do you think it’s because they always use the photograph with the most wrinkles?
CLERMONT CRONIES: Our Clermont Crusader says that defamation lawsuit against former Clermont County Commissioner Archie Wilson has finally been settled. Terms of the settlement are not being disclosed and the parties “agreed to be bound by a confidentiality clause that has some punitive measures if it’s violated (especially to The Blower), especially the attorneys.
THIS WEEK IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says Northern Kentucky Tea Partiers planning to attend the Republican National Convention in Tampa will see some really high class entertainment. The Sarah Palin Lookalike Stripper will be there, and so will the Leftist Ladies from “Code Pink.” Their slogan is “Bring Your Vagina to the RNC.” What a “Family Values Event” this is going to be.
READING THE TEA LEAVES: About 50 Tea Party Patriots showed up at the Northwest Tea Party meeting in Colerain Monday night. Sheriff candidate Jim O’Neil attended and passed out a campaign flyer that proudly stated on the front page: “Opposed SB5″ and “Opposed to Right to Work laws.” Maybe the geniuses running his campaign should advise him to leave the anti-free market union goon propaganda in the car the next time he tries to win the votes of patriotic right wingers.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES:Summer still sweltering and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.
Summer Sports Summer is the time for sports So search for a lovely doll Who is yearning for some action And willing to play ball.
THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane who the thought was really behind that Chick-Fil-A controversy, where all those Liberal Whackos are trying to put that great chicken sandwich restaurant out of business. “My best guess,” Kane explained, “It’s the chickens.”
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:The Blower’s Campaign Countdowns to will continue. Speaking of which, the 2012 Elections are only “99” days away.
Monday we’ll be going for the gold when we politicize the Olympics.
Tuesday is “Mutts Day” for all you mixed-race people to celebrate.
Wednesday is “Chick-Fil-A Day,” and all those whiny Liberals out there might just as well boycott the place, because with all the great publicity they’ve given those restaurants, they’ll be so packed, they’ll never be about to get near the place.
Thursday is “National Ice Cream Sandwich Day.” So It’ll be good eating this week.
And the first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “How about a political Olympics event,” so give it your personal best.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political scorekeeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political scorekeeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Why does President Obama keep visiting the Middle East, but skipping our closest ally there?
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
At yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane what were the three biggest gaffes Obama’s made lately. “That’s easy,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, as he checked his Obama Gaffe Scorecard. “On June 8, Obama said ‘The truth of the matter is that, as I said, we created 4.3 million jobs over the last 27 months, over 800,000 just this year alone. The private sector is doing fine.’ On July 13, Obama said, ‘If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen.’ And on July 24, Obama said ‘Just like we’ve tried their plan, we tried our plan — and it worked.’ Ever since Obama’s been weaning himself off his teleprompter, he’s really been on a roll. In fact, he’s beginning to sound a lot like Vice President Biden lately.”
No wonder Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen wasn’t surprised that 59% of business owners disapprove of Obama’s performance, according to a Gallup pollreleased on Thursday. It also explains why there’s such a lack of enthusiasm from Discouraged DemocrATS, compared to 2008.The Economy lost more than 200,000 small businesses between 2008 and 2010. That’s 3 million jobs, according to Census figures.
And did you see Romney’s new “Built by US” web site where you can download a sign to show your support? How timely is that?
Meanwhile, WhistleblowerBusiness Editor Merrill Forbes says despite Obama’s claims about a resurgent GM ready to repay its bailout tab, the automaker and its former bank still owe over-taxed payers nearly $42 billion, according to an inspector general’s report. And Obama’s health care law would raises taxes by $1 trillion, according to a new report from the Congressional Budget Office. That ought to do wonders for the Economy.
This weekend, Ohio Senator Rob “Fighting for the FDIC” Portman is on a Surrogates Blitz in Pennsylvania, while Romney is overseas. Of course, seven other potential Romney Running Mates are hitting some of the other swing states. Bob McDonnell and Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal are headed to Iowa. South Dakota Senator John Thune was in Virginia to bracket Obama’s visit to the Old Dominion state on Friday. Also on Friday, former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani was in Florida, a place where voters know him well. Former Minnesota governor and one-time presidential candidate Tim Pawlenty will make an appearance in Raleigh, North Carolina. Florida Senator Marco Rubio will spend Saturday in Las Vegas. Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus will be traveling on a bus through Wisconsin this Sunday, and Congressman Paul Ryan of Wisconsin will probably be there too. South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley will travel to Michigan on Romney’s behalf.
Is it only a coincidence that all of these people are being considered for Romney’s Running Mate?
In Cincinnati, everybody’s wondering when Dainty DemocRAT Mayor Mark Mallory will be calling his Extreme Liberal Clown-cil back into session to pass a resolution to ban Chick-Fil-A from opening up any more restaurants within the city limits, after other gay-loving Liberal Big City Mayors got all bent out of shape when the company’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage” last week. We used to think all Liberals supported the First Amendment. We must’ve been wrong.
Let’s face it, the Nation of Islam can open a restaurant in Chicago, but not Chick-Fil-A. Our Compassionate Conservative says the perfect solution to all that liberal whining about Chic-Fil-A would be to locate the restaurant inside a mosque. There’s no way our oh-so-tolerant liberals would be against that!
Remember when ABC praised Free Speech for the Dixie Chicks? Now they’re slamming Chick-Fil-A for a firestorm of hate.
Maybe that’s why as Chick-fil-A experiences the full frontal assault of the homosexual movement’s efforts to squash those who publicly uphold and defend traditional views of marriage and sexuality, a number of high profile leaders have joined The Blower to offer a little encouragement by promoting next Wednesday as Chick-fil-A Day, when according to “The Onion,” Chick-Fil-A will be debuting its New Homophobic Sandwich when its “Queer-Hatin” Cordon Bleu’ goes on sale.
Speaking of Downtown Restaurants, wasn’t Mahogany’s supposed to open in time for this weekend’s Soul “Full’ Festival? How come da Mayor and da Dough Boy aren’t down at the Banks washing windows and getting the soul food servers trained on how to be respectful to da white patrons when they don’t tip! WLW Hate Radio’s Scott Slone said they still had a “Coming Soon” sign up. Maybe it’s like when the Maisonette and Jeff Ruby’s didn’t want to be open during the Festival so they took that week off every summer.
Meanwhile, Testy Troublemaker Tino Delgato says Cincinnati’s so-called Police Chief has now spent more time avoiding his test than the hours he could have used to study and take it. How embarrassing for Cincinnati. Next time, check the qualifications and pre-requisites before you hire somebody. Craig did a TV commercial for the online University of Phoenix. Didn’t he have to take any tests to graduate from there? Maybe he can retire soon. Go Figure!!!
And why is the city delaying turning over documents about chief’s knowledge of testing requirement? Do you think their excuse is that David A. Pepper was in charge of finding out what documents had to be turned over, just like he was responsible for figuring out if the commission could grant the waiver?
Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1868, the 14th Amendment guaranteeing citizenship to African Americans was officially adopted into the U.S. Constitution, and without a whole lot of DemocRAT help— just like these days.
Today, with only “101” more days until the November Elections, the phone banking effort is in full swing and all those Romney Victory Centers will be open so volunteers can bug the crap out of their neighbors on the phone. The Americans for Prosperity Victory Center will be open, too, and Phil Burr-Ass’ Citizens for Community Values Action Center will have mini-sub sandwiches and plenty of refreshments. At the same time, maybe “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup should stop waiting for his RINO Party Appointed Campaign Mangler to begin to get things organized and just tell his patients that walking door-to-door delivering campaign literature would be a great way for them to get some much-needed exercise for their broken feet. Now, if only somebody had remembered to order the campaign literature.
Meanwhile, Obsessive Obama Supporters Tom and Rose got six e-mails from Michelle on her over-taxed payers’ funded Olympics junket asking them to join at those other Dumbed-Down DemocRATS at that 2,198 square-foot home at 1753 Bloomingdale Avenue to encourage Obamabots to sign Obama’s Birthday Card and send in $3 for a chance to be invited to Obama’s Birthday Party.
This weekend at Anderson Daze, if you can’t find Disgraced Township Dis-Trustee Kevin O’Brien at the Trustees Booth, you find him shaking hands at the Masturbators Anonymous booth.
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says everybody in Northern Kentucky is wondering who will win the Sexual Olympics. Forbes.com has its money on Durex. More than 10,000 Olympic athletes with be capping willies with the Durex brand. According to recent media reports, within one week athletes routinely tear through the 100,000 condoms, turning the Olympic Village into bed-hopping sex fest. In Vancouver, 70,000 condoms lasted a week. In Beijing, it was 100,000. It’s not a stretch to say that number could hit 130,000 at the London Olympics.
Which is why our Quote for Today Committee chose Jesse Owens’ “Olympics: A lifetime of training for just ten seconds.”
Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, everybody was talking about Friday night’s $42.3 Million Opening Ceremonies show at the 2012 London Olympics. How much is that in Euros anyway? It’s a good thing Channel 5 is back on Warner Cable, or else we’d all have to pack ourselves into the waiting room at Beechmont Subaru to watch the overpriced festivities on Direct TV. And what a coincidence—that would be right across the street from Chick-Fil-A.
REMEMBER: If you can’t improve on the news, you shouldn’t even be reporting it.
SEXUAL OLYMPICS HOT LINE
e-mail your favorite events today.
Some sexual Olympics items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally sexual Olympian subscribers.
Link of the Day
Our Favorite Sexual Olympics Event
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Presumptive Republican Presidential Nominee Mitt Romney began his a week-long trip to Britain, Israel, and Poland, to meet with leaders of some of America’s allies who’ve received some really shabby and offensive treatment from the Obama Administration. Amazingly, Romney hasn’t bowed to a single foreign leader yet.
If Obama wants an Olympic Gold Medal, like his bogus Nobel Peace Prize, maybe he can retrieve Muhammad Ali’s that he threw into the Ohio River in the 1960s.
Before leaving for Europe, NBC’s Brian Williams asked Romney if he planned to pick an incredibly boring white guy for VP, and Romney quipped, “You told me you were not available.” Meanwhile, with only “101” more days until the Presidential Elections, Obama is jetting around to campaign events on Air Force One making statements like, “Our union may not be perfect, but it is perfectible,” whatever the hell that’s supposed to mean. No wonder Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says voters trust Romney more than Obama on the Economy 49%-43%.
The Twitter Olympics had hardly begun, and Greek triple jumper Voula Papachristou wasexpelled for her Twitter posts commenting on African immigrants (“So many Africans in Greece at least West Nile mosquitoes will eat homemade food”) and expressing support for a far-right party. Voula will really be missed. Our Good Friend Bobby Leach says he’d like to triple jump her.
Back home, Liberals just can’t stop whining about Chick-Fil-A restaurants after the company’s president Dan Cathy stated his support for “traditional marriage” last week. Left-wing Lunatic Roseanne Barr even went postal when she wished everybody who at Chick-Fil-A got cancer.
Maybe that’s why Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception says, “How would you like to see this Chick Fil A’d?” For the location of the nearest Chick-Fil-A, CLICK HERE.
Our Clermont Crusader says that defamation lawsuit against former Clermont County Commissioner Archie Wilson has finally been settled.Terms of the settlement are not being disclosed and the parties “agreed to be bound by a confidentiality clause that has some punitive measures if it’s violated (especially to The Blower), especially the attorneys.
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says city leaders in Steubenville, have decided to change their official logo after the Freedom From Religion Foundation threatened to sue because the emblem included a silhouette of a cross atop the Franciscan University chapel. Maybe they could replace it with a new Chick-Fil-A location.
From the Great White North, at the ten-minute Clearcreek Township meeting in Warren County, Police officer Larry Cornett was assigned to guard the two trustees (one was missing in action). Officer Cornett weighs 350 lbs (the maximum weight limit in Ohio is 235 lbs if you’re 6 ft 5 in tall). He leaned up against the back wall fell fast asleep just like all the other overweight police officers here in Clearcreek Township do while on late shift duty. The police chief Terrill is in the same condition. When asked by one of the trustees to take the physical test to be a legal officer, he refused. Shouldn’t they have their guns taken away since they’re only a secondary police force? Maybe they should only be allowed to hand out warning tickets.
The Cincinnati City Mess (You only Read About in The Blower)
Cincinnati police chief James Craig knew before he was hired last summer the state of Ohio would require him to take the state peace officer exam to earn full police powers. Craig even signed his name to a state document on July 13, 2011, indicating he understood the state requirement. Now Craig says he “misunderstood” the meaning of that state document. Does Craig have a learning problem, too?
Bumbling city manager Dough Boy Honey was informed of the police chief test requirement by the state on July 11, 2011. Under a previous formal Freedom of Information request, the city did not include that July 11 document. City spokeshag Meg Olderding said the state document was, um, “overlooked.” Does Dough Boy Honey have an honesty problem, too?
Is the major reason behind Craig’s balking because he can’t pass the 200-question test, even though he’s had seven full time police supervisors tutoring him for months? Craig should take the test and stop the wimpy whining.
This weekend at Anderson Daze, the Anderson Township Republican Club will be sharing space (and hopefully expenses) with local and national campaigns to staff a booth at the 2012 Greater Anderson Days at Beech Acres Park. Disgraced Township Dis-Trustee Kevin O’Brien says he needs a ride home after the event, and he promises not to masturbate in your car.
Meanwhile, Angry Andersonians say there was nary a word about the Mad Masturbator in Wednesday’s edition of the “Forest Hills Urinal,” but Community Press Senior Editor Marc Emral gave himself a column to explain that this month, the cost of a voluntary monthly payment will be $3.50 (up from $2.50) for a kid to throw your FHU in the bushes every Wednesday, Thursday, or whenever he gets around to it.
Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1953, an armistice was signed, bringing the Korean War to an end, and Defeatist DemocRATS in Congress began demanding an immediate withdrawal of all American troops from the Korean peninsula. How’d that ever work out anyway?
Northern Kentucky Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says Congressman Goof Doofus has released a new graphic to help visualize the massive amount of regulations and government red tape facing businesses. The Republican-led House on Thursday passed legislation that would freeze major government regulations until the unemployment rate, now at 8.2%, drops to 6% or below. Hey Goofster, nice artwork—but how could we tell if it’s wrong?
Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane who the thought was really behind that Chick-Fil-A controversy, where all those Liberal Whackos are trying to put that great chicken sandwich restaurant out of business.
“My best guess,” Kane explained, “It’s the chickens.”
REMEMBER: If you can’t improve on the news, you shouldn’t even be reporting it.
Stories We’re Working On
Obama Assault Ban Talk a Dem Dud
Romney questions if Brits are ready for Olympics
New African-American Education Officean oxymoron
Meatless Mondays to Fight Global Warming
Price Hike at The Fishwrap
Southgate House to reopen in Northgate
Lesbians plan kissing protest at Chick Fil A in Florence
Whistleblower Web Poll
This week, here’s why the first 17,648 Whistleblower Readers Poll respondents said most people won’t be watching the 2012 Olympics in London:
(A) Too cold for women’s beach volleyball bikinis: 2%
(B) Can’t understand the language: 1%
(C) Reds have won seven straight: 1%
(D) Not enough coverage on TV: 96%
Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!
Successful Submissions
This week, everybody who thinks Obama really stepped in it when he said “If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen,” e-mailed entries to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is Marty Mocker, who says he really likes watching the way the Romney Campaign pummels Obama every time he goes off his teleprompter and off his teleprompter at the same time.
Marty wins, a women’s beach volleyball (in bikinis) video, a politically incorrect tweet from Voula Papachristou, and front row seats at the Chick-Fil-A in Florence for the upcoming Lesbian kissing protest. His winning Limerick is:
Here’s who to thank when you succeed:
You can skip over those with a leftist creed;
And don’t count those who always sleep late,
Or those who sit in cars and masturbate.
“Early to bed and early to rise” is the only rule you need.
So who can you thank when you succeed?
Don’t listen to those liberal hearts that bleed,
Forget presidents from Kenya,
And government handouts that demean ya.
Thank the Lord Almighty; of Him only take heed.
And from the Anderson Laureate (who says, “The Government didn’t help me write this!”)
Here’s who to thank when you succeed
It’s the Kenyan we elected to lead
If you succeed here or in Japan
Somebody else made that happen
(I think that socialist has been smoking weed)
The Dems are seriously vexed
Claiming Barak was taken out of context
But he said what he said
They should get that through their head
What kind of lies will they try to sell next?
I guess Henry Ford did nothing on his own
And Bell had help inventing the phone
Bill Gates was a fake
Betty Crocker didn’t bake
Obama’s ideology makes me groan.
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“How about a political Olympics event?”
CONSERVATIVE COUNTERATTACK HOT LINE
E-mail your Republican Responses today
Some political strategy items in today’s Blowerwere sent in by our equally political strategic subscribers.
Link of the Day
Romney Web Ad Rips Obama’s “It Worked” Remark
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Monday, The Fishwrap featured a photo essay gallery of readers’ choices for the Top Ten Events they’d like to see in Cincinnati. First Choice by far was Major League Baseball’s All Star Game with 653 votes.
Curiously, yesterday’s Racial Racketeering Road Show featuring Al Sharpton and Trayvon Martin’s Headline-Hunting, Settlement-Seeking, Obama-Supporting, Unmarried Parents showed up at the Duke Energy Convention Center’s Grand Ballroom. Costs to attend were only $250 for adults and $50 for students.
Did Cincinnati’s Girly Mayor Mark Mallory wear his hoodie? Couldn’t you just feel all that Racial Healing going on?
Number Four on the Top Ten List was the Olympics, which will be officially under way tomorrow in London, England. Mitt Romney will be there, going for the gold by supporting a minute of silence at the ceremony to honor Israeli athletes killed at the 1972 Munich Olympics.
NBC Sports anchor Bob Costas says he plans his own on-air commemoration this week of the Israelis killed in Munich 40 years ago, despite the refusal of Olympic authorities to do so during Friday’s opening ceremony for the London Games.
Romney can pick up his Gold Medal when he assures the people of Israel they deserve better diplomatic support and fewer defense secrets released than they’ve been receiving from the United States under Obama, when he visits Israel later on his trip.
On the eve of a week-long trip abroad meant to demonstrate his command of foreign policy issues, Mitt Romney blasted President Obama’s handling of the U.S. alliance with Israel, his efforts to stop Iran’s nuclear bomb capabilities, and his handling of national security secrets. Chiming in with a timely blog entry, Congressman Steve Chabothead wrote about foreign policy Wednesday, calling Obama every bit as disastrous on the international scene as he has been on the domestic front. But isn’t that what Congressmen are supposed to do? Somebody ought to remind Alex T.’s hand-picked campaign mangler on “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s campaign.
What a bummer that was for Obama. Obama Supporters saw the 2016 O-lympics in Chicago as a great kickoff for Obama’s “Historic Third Term.” Do you think Obama’s“Special Olympics Joke” on Jay Leno helped America’s cause?
Obama’s rejection on the world stage because he failed to bring the Olympics to Chicago will be nothing compared to what he feels when the polls close in “102” more days.
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says Mitt Romney may be headed overseas, but his campaign is definitely not taking a pause. The Romney campaign is holding 24 events across 12 battleground states Wednesday all trying to remind voters of comments the president made last week and the great economy he’s created. Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says an event in Columbus was included.
Tonight is the opening of Anderson Daze, and everybody’s wondering if Disgraced Township Dis Tustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien still plans to enter the Anderson’s Got Talent competition with his now famous “Choking the Chicken” Act. Spanky’s Supporters confidently believe that he will be able to beat-off any and all challengers. He considered performing his other act affectionately known as the “Two-finger Tango,” but settled on Choking the Chicken since it was publicized by his enablers at The Forest Hills Urinal. We tried contacting “the old Monkey Spanker, but his lawyer said he was busy in the bathroom rehearsing.
Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1775, the US Postal System was established. Who says bureaucracies don’t last?Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Ronald Reagan’s “A government bureau is the closest thing to eternal life we’ll ever see on this earth.”
Republicans for Higher Taxes discovered that State Rep-tile Connie “The Pillager” has accepted a second donation from a known racist. Their blog reported the Pillager’s first racist campaign contribution in May. Will Connie do the right thing and return this dirty money? Don’t count on it.
About 50 Tea Party Patriots showed up at the Northwest Tea Party meeting in Colerain Monday night. Sheriff candidate Jim O’Neil attended and passed out a campaign flyer that proudly stated on the front page: “Opposed SB5″ and “Opposed to Right to Work laws.” Maybe the geniuses running his campaign should advise him to leave the anti-free market union goon propaganda in the car the next time he tries to win the votes of patriotic right wingers.
Whistleblower Senior Spoiled Sports Editor Andy FurBall wonders if when Bungals owner told Paul Daugherty “His team may be the best in the AFC North,” was that written before he found out the Bungals’ first round draft pick might be out for most of the season with a leg injury?
Over at The Fishwrap, Radio-TV Columnist John Quichwarmer says another reporter is leaving Channel 9 “Substantially True” News. That makes lots of them who’ve left recently, or as Marty Brennaman would say, “of late.” But what Quich never tells you in any of those stories is why all those people are really leaving.
Speaking of Voter Fraud, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo heard drug money has been funding voter fraud in Clay County, Kentucky. The good news is, it’s bi-partisan. According to Fox News, more than $400,000, part of it drug proceeds, was pooled by DemocRAT and Republican politicians over several elections, and spent to buy the votes of more than 8,000 voters, usually at $50 apiece. One voter was even able to bid up the cost of his vote to $800. Meanwhile, Congressman Goof Doofus wonders, “How come Clay County isn’t in my district?”
Finally, Political Insiders at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about all those gullible donors who pissed their money away on Nick Vehr’s failed wet dream to bring the 2012 Olympics to Cincinnati.
“It’s hard to believe people could’ve ever been quite that stupid,” Kane replied.
More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans
Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our July fund-raising drivefrom the Cincinnati 2024 Olympics Committee, because there are still a few gullible people out there.
OBAMA O-LYMPICS HOT LINE
e-mail your personal bests today.
Some Olympic Medal Winning items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Olympic Medal Winning subscribers
Link of the Day
Rove On Obama’s Olympic Failure “He Got What He Deserved”
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Did He Use Obama-Cash to Buy the Ammo?
Noted Legal Scholar Napolitano Tadwell says, following recent events, what everyone seems to forget about Obama’s attack on success is that it isn’t just a tool to deny successful people the credit they deserve, it also allows some people to escape responsibility for their failures, especially since Movie Murderer James Holmes received a $26,000 federal grant from the National Institutes of Health.
Also at Obama’s photo op to exploit the Colorado Movie Massacre, there were no calls for “civility” after this murderous mayhem like there were in after DemocRAT Congresswoman Gabby Giffords was shot in Arizona. What a difference a re-election campaign makes. Today, with only “103” more days until the November Elections, our DC Newsbreaker says White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard has had nothing to say about the need for Washington to set an example of “civility” because America’s Source of Incivility is sitting in the White House.
Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says a new Gallup Poll finds 65% say Romney’s business background will help him govern the economy, and only 29% disagree. Maybe that’s because a record number of Americans took Social Security Disability Payments in July (8,733,461). Didn’t Obama tell Bush in 2003 “Fix the economy, because a $300 Billion deficit was reckless?” Congratulations, Big Spenders! It’s official!” the Federal Government has run another $1 Trillion Deficit, for the fifth year in a row. If we’re not mistaken, that would mean Obama’s amassed a larger deficit than every other president from Washington to Bush combined. How historic is that?
Monday night’s trio of fundraisers made it a total of 185 since Obama filed for re-election 15 months ago. But Tuesday was another busy day for Obama. Just look at his schedule. You’d think he didn’t have a country to run.
10:15 am || Departs San Francisco 11:40 am || Arrives Portland, Oregon 1:50 pm || Attends a fundraiser; Oregon Convention Center, Portland 4:10 pm || Attends a second fundraiser; Oregon Convention Center 5:05 pm || Departs Portland 5:50 pm || Arrives Seattle 6:15 pm || Attends a fundraiser; private residence, Hunts Point, Washington 8:15 pm || Speaks at a second fundraiser; private residence, Hunts Point, Washington
All times Pacific
And watching the national debt skyrocket under President Barack Obama, it’s not surprising that his campaign is operating in a similar fashion. Reports that Team Obama raised less than they spent in June is the kind of economics we’ve come to expect from this president and his cronies. We’ve also come to expect that his obscenely expensive ideas, always financed with other people’s money, always fail miserably. That’s probably why Michelle Obama’s campaign stops in Dayton and Columbus on Tuesday had so little impact, even in The Fishwrap.
In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Romney continues to out-raise Obama in Ohio, according to the most-recent campaign-finance disclosures.
Hurley the Historian says on this day in 1985, Rock Hudson announced that he was suffering from acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS). How could that be? Nobody even knew the tall, dark and handsome Hollywood leading man was gay, in spite of all those Rock Hudson gay jokes that had been around for years. [Read some of them here]
Whistleblower Alternate Life-Styles Columnist Ben Dover and Phil McKrevis say in 1973, the American Psychiatric Association removed homosexuality from its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Psychiatric Disorders. The American Psychological Association followed suit in 1975, declaring that it is “not a disorder.”
So how long will it be until the Left puts pressure on both APAs to remove schizophrenia from its list of disorders, and then starts campaigning to allow one of the “split personalities” to marry the other? You read it here first, it could happen.
Monday, Obama told veterans they are a “Top Priority” for the first time ever. Do you think last weekend’s poll showing Romney crushing Obama among military vets 59% to 35% was a wake-up call for the man who’s supposed to be their Commander-in-Chief. Obama also heaped praise on himself for ending the War in Iraq on the same day over 100 People were murdered by Al-Qaeda. It was the bloodiest day in Iraq during the past two years.
In Congress, DemocRAT Senator Diane Feinstein, Chairwoman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, said the White House appears to be responsible for leaking classified national security information. No wonder Romney casually mentioned Obama’s White House Leaks during his VFW Convention Speech on Tuesday.
Speaking of the Military, word is the Air Force is buying $59/Gal Biofuel from a company connected to a Big DemocRAT Donor. What are the chances of that! Also at one of Monday night’s fund-raisers, a couple of Obama’s Crony Capitalists from Solyndra showed up at the $35,800-per-person event. We’re shocked, shocked!
And there was a real military theme to Sunday’s opening of the Clermont County Fair. Flags were flying. Recruits raised their right hands to be sworn into various military branches. And Whistleblower Faux Facebook Friend State Rep-tile Danny Bubp-kis wore his dress blue uniform. What a great place for a military guy to get some publicity, if only Alex T.’s hand-picked campaign mangler hadn’t sent Congressman “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup somewhere else in the boondocks.
Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says Tuesday the American Legion hosted a job fair aimed at finding employment for veterans. More than 40 employers were expected to attend the “Hiring our Heroes” event at American Legion Boone Post 4, located at 8385 U.S. Highway 42 in Florence.
The CamBoozler also says,Northern Kentucky Tea Partiers planning to attend the Republican National Convention in Tampa will see some really high class entertainment. The Sarah Palin Lookalike Stripper will be there, and so will the Leftist Ladies from “Code Pink.” Their slogan is “Bring Your Vagina to the RNC.” What a “Family Values Event” this is going to be.
In today’s Racial Healing Update, the Chicago Teachers Union Chief blames “lower-class” black students for their poor teaching record, and with today’s DemocRAT Voter Fraud Update, according to a two week sampling of voter registrations in Galveston County, Texas, 47% of all NAACP voter registrations were definably suspicious, if not fraudulent.
In a somewhat related item, our favorite Pervert Attorney James “The Rock” Bogen says word has it that they’re having trouble getting those Penn State wins off the record books because the pages are stuck together.
And at this week’s meeting of Masturbators Anonymous in Anderson, Disgraced Dis-Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien was criticized by all the other pud pullers in the audience for not being anonymous enough.
Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose these words of wisdom from “The Watchtower”: “That masturbation is abnormal and unnatural is also indicated by the fact that abnormal, mentally deranged people are notorious masturbators.”
Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane what happened when all those people showed up to demand Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien’s resignation at last week’s monthly Trustees Meeting.
“I can hardly wait to see how Kevin’s enablers at the “Forest Hills Urinal” cover it up in Wednesday’s E-dition,” Kane explained.
MASTURBATION ANONYMOUS HOT LINE
e-mail your favorite fantasies today.
Some masturbating items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally masturbating subscribers, but we could always use more.
Link of the Day
Family Feud – Masturbate
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Was I wrong not to say anything bad about Obama on Sunday while the Mourner-in-Chief was pandering for votes following the Batman Movie Shooting in Colorado? —Mitt Romney
Obama’s Aurora appearance offered us another wonderful opportunity to present him as a healing unifier, while we continue to wage our slash and burn campaign featuring unsubstantiated charges against Mitt Romney, warfare, and charges of racism. —Team Obama
Why would anybody say Disingenuous DemocRATS are always exploitingDeath, Tragedy, and Crisis for Political Gain? —Their Willing Accomplices in the Liberal News Media
Now, during Obama’s “historic” presidency, we have the largest mass shooting in U.S. History. —Charles Manson
And we did our best to blame the Tea Party. —ABC’s Cracked Reporters Brian Ross and George Stephanopoulos
It’s not as if Obama hasn’t played politics with shooting victims before, except if you count his shamelessly exploiting the Death of Trayvon Martin, the Virginia Tech tragedy, and the shooting of Arizona Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. —Hurley the Historian
With only “104” more days until the November Elections, how long do you imagine the Colorado Movie Massacre will divert voters’ attention from the economy? —Campaign Countdowners
Did you see the latest poll that says twice as many voters now blame Obama for messing up the economy as me? —George W. Bush
Maybe that’s because 72% of Americans disagree with Obama’s “You didn’t build that” claim. —Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen
Want to celebrate Obama’s birthday with him — at the Obamas’ house in Chicago? Donate $3 or whatever you can to be automatically entered today. —Obama for America
Ohio’s economy must be looking up these days. Why else would Vice President Joe Biden have come to town last Thursday trying to claim total credit for the Obama Administration? —Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders
Will Obama and Biden be claiming credit for the improved economy in the rest of our states, too. —GOP Governors Association
Did anybody see me on Sean Hannity’s TV show last Thursday night when I lambasted Liberal Lunatic Leslie Marshall about job creation, outsourcing, and whether Barack Hussein Obama deserves a second term? If only I was that good on my own TV show, I might even have an audience. —WLW Hate Radio Trash Talker Bill Cunningham
Is the Reds Magic Number really only “68” after Sunday’s big sweep? —Typical Reds Rooter Farley Fairweather
We’re really sad about Penn State’s $60 Million NCAA Penalty. —The Ohio State Buckeyes
Thanks for mentioning our price increase. —Feckless Fishwrappers
When the Olympics begins in London later this week, please don’t remind all those gullible donors who pissed their money away on my failed wet dream and made-up job to bring the 2012 Olympics to Cincinnati, and tell them “We told you so.” —Nick Vehr
How many people showed up at last week’s Trustees meeting to demandDisgraced Dis-Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien’s resignation for masturbating in a woman’s car? —Angry Andersonians
Since we published our Diabolical Disclaimer Policy two weeks ago, we’ll never have to apologize again. —Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane
We’d really hate it if one of our NoKY Snitches didn’t tell us the unvarnished truth. —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
You mean some things in The Blower aren’t 100% true? —Congressman Goof Doofus
Unlike newspaper blogs, which pretend to care about maintaining a dose of civility, The Whistleblower might still contain unlawful, threatening, abusive, libelous, defamatory, vulgar, pornographic, profane, or even indecent information. —Scott Wartman at the Fishwrap
Sometimes The Blower uses racial and ethnic slurs to show that bigotry of any kind is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a total retard.—Special Ed (on Crank Yankers)
Sometimes The Blower uses gay bashing and race baiting to show that intolerance of any kind is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a real flamer. —Gay Darkies
Sometimes The Blower makes fun of dead people to show that necrophilia in public is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a stiff. —Coroners in Kenton, Campbell, and Boondoggle Counties
Sometimes The Blower questions a person’s motives to show that dishonesty of any kind is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t an elected official. —Bill Erpenbeck
And sometimes The Blower even borrows a phrase to show that plagiarism of any kind is not appropriate in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t on Skaggie Maggie’s Idiotorial Board at the Morning Fishwrap. —Repeat Bronson
I like the Whistleblower Disclaimer that says: “This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental.” —Rick “The BatBoy” Robinson (who never used a disclaimer in his trashy book about that blow job scene that started on page 64 and didn’t get finished until page 78)
I like the Whistleblower Disclaimer that says: “This publication is a not work of fiction. No names have been changed to protect the innocent. Screw the innocent!” —Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney E. Rob Sanders
I like the Whistleblower Disclaimer that says: “This publication is sometimes a work of fiction, but it may still contain inappropriate remarks and unsupported personal attacks.” —Disgraced Megalomaniacal Former WLW Hate Radio Enabled, Failed Video Blogging, Trash Talking, Racist, Amazingly-Still-Not-Disbarred Loudmouth Lawyer, Failed Restaurateur, Comedian Wannabe Eric “Call Me Crazy” Deters
That’s why we chose Will Ketterson’s “Quibbling is the creation of a false impression in the mind of the listener by cleverly wording what is said, omitting relevant facts or telling a partial truth when one does so with the intent to deceive or mislead.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
Many of the things Trish the Dish says on the air do not reflect the views of this station. —Channel 19 News
Our long local nightmare is now over, Channel 5 settled its account and Warner Cable viewers can once again see Sheree Paolello on the air.—Jack Atherton
—Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer —
Sometimes The Blower makes fun of politicians who show up at hospitals to show that insincere sympathy is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t trying to take advantage of a tragedy.
This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental, especially incumbent presidential Consolers-in-Chief.
POLITICAL INSINCERITY HOT LINE
e-mail your egregious examples today.
Some Obama Campaign Bashing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Obama Campaign Bashing subscribers, but we could always use more.
Link of the Day
Obama on Colorado Batman Shootings
(When in doubt blame it on the Iranians)
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
Is it just us, or does it seem as if Disingenuous DemocRATS and their willing accomplices in the Liberal News Media always exploiting Death, Tragedy, and Crisis for Political Gain?
Their views on religion, global warming, women’s rights, gay rights, minority equality, abortion, gun control, the death penalty, evolution, consumerism, corporate influence, the poor, the middle class, the wealthy, and patriotism are well known, and whenever something bad happens, Liberals can hardly wait to use that event to divide our nation and advance their ideology.
Maybe that’s why nobody was really surprised at Saturday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda when Political Insiders asked Political Insiders asked Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane how long it would be before Obama would being to exploit the Midnight Movie Massacre in Colorado.
“About three minutes,” Kane replied. “With only ‘105’ more days until the Presidential Elections, anything that diverts voters’ attention from the economy is just what Obama and the DemocRATS want. Obama Supporters in the Press couldn’t wait to attack the Tea Party. Flags at the White House are already flying at half staff to show how much he cares. And our Narcissist-in-Chief referred to himself at least 17 times during his speech on the Colorado movie shooting.”
In Fort Myers, Florida, Obama supporters hooted and hollered through Obama’s so-called “remembrance speech for the victims of the Colorado movie shooting,” chanting “Four More Years!” at what was supposed to be a “non-political event.”
Obama even said, “But what if Malia and Sasha had been at the theater?” Then the entire audience would’ve had Secret Service protection. You can’t get much more non-political than that.
The murders in Colorado stunned that political world led to only a momentary pause in Team Obama’s all out campaigning on the presidential trail. Saturday Obama’s Weekly Address was all about “Remembering the Victims of the Aurora Shooting.”Was that a coincidence or what?
Sunday afternoon, Obama jetted to Colorado on Air Force One (at over-taxed payers’ expense) for photo opportunities with victims’ families. Then it was off to California on his full-time job of campaigning and fund-raising, while the Jobs Council lays dormant.
According to Keith Koffler at the “White House Dossier,” Obama’s Aurora appearance offered Obama a chance to present himself as a healing unifier, even as he continues waging his slash and burn campaign that has featured unsubstantiated charges against Mitt Romney, elements of class warfare, and suggestions by Vice President Joe Biden and other surrogates that Republicans are practicing racism.
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus recalls wondering if Obama’s photo-op “Together We Thrive” pep rally memorial service after the Atrocity in Arizona in January 2011 was the official kickoff for Obama’s orchestrated, over-taxed payer funded re-election campaign.
What a classy memorial service it was— complete the presidential seal on the podium and T-Shirts that said “Six people died and all I got was this crappy T-Shirt.” We hadn’t seen that much clapping and shouting at a funeral since that oh-so-political funeral for Good DemocRAT Paul Wellstone.
Unfortunately, in Obama’s America, tragedies like the Colorado Movie Massacre could happen to any one of us. Now, during Obama’s “historic” presidency, we have the largest mass shooting in U.S. History.
That’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose Robert Francis Kennedy’s “Tragedy is a tool for the living to gain wisdom, not a guide by which to live.”
COLORADO MOVIE MASSACRE HOT LINE
e-mail your thoughts and prayers today.
Some sympathetic items in today’s Blowerwere sent in by our equally sympathetic subscribers.
Link of the Day
MOURNING IN AMERICA
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OUR NUMBER ONE STORY THIS WEEKwasthe way the national media mostly ignored Monday’s Just Another Crappy Obama Campaign Event in Cincinnati, and totally ignored that Weak Tea Party excuse for a protest on Fountain Square.
The only thing special was when the Obama met Jerry Springer. Imagine that— the worst president in American history shaking hands with the most embarrassing elected official in Southwest Ohio history. The national media seemed much more interested in the Romney Campaign’s latest tease about his Vice Presidential Pick, and most people hereabouts on Monday were much more concerned about Joey Votto’s knee surgery.
Still, to our local Obama Supporters in the Press, Obama’s visit was like the Second Coming of Christ, especially The Fishwrap. Do you think they were laying it on a little thick with that MacArthur-esque “I will return!” headline?
OUR NUMBER TWO STORY THIS WEEKwas at the City Hall Circus, when everybody was wondering who was picking up the tab for Cincinnati’s so-called Police Chief James Craig’s “I Don’t Wanna Take No Stinkin’ non-Phoenix On-line Test” Legal Team of David A. Pepper, Nathaniel Jones and Jason Groppe plus two law clerk flunkies who showed up at Thursday’s hearing.
Cincinnati police chief James Craig finally made the trip Thursday for the hearing he requested to exempt himself from taking the basic Ohio peace officer certification test. Craig had cancelled two previous hearings.
The peace officer certification board said they had no authority to change the law just for Craig. Craig’s lawyer has seven days to rebut this decision and then there are thirty days for the board to respond.
Craig hasn’t taken the required test, despite having seven full time police tutors. He seeks to be the first person in Ohio history to be exempted.
Did Craig really say it wasn’t in his job description to take the test? Didn’t his on-line college teach him anything? Also at yesterday’s hearing, the attorney for the Ohio Peace Officer Training Commission pointed out to the commission that she didn’t think the waiver Craig is requesting is even legal. No wonder Chief Craig’s attorneys requested time to respond to that. Should Craig’s attorneys have addressed that to begin with? No wonder we’ve never heard about David Pepper’s legal expertise as an attorney before.
AND OUR NUMBER THREE STORY THIS WEEK was the reaction to Friday’s Colorado Movie Massacre Story by some Obama Supporters in the Press:
On “Good Morning America,” ABC News’ Brian Ross and George Stephanopoulos tried to tie the Colorado Movie Shooter to the Tea Party, just like Obama Supporters in the Press attempted to blame the Tea Party for the Tucson shootings in January 2011, shortly after Republicans swept the midterm elections. Now, with only “107” more days until the in the Presidential Elections, the mainstream media seems poised to do the same.
Later, ABC News was forced to retract its claim and apologize for saying the Colorado Movie Shooter was linked to the Tea Party, just because a guy more than twice the age of the shooter had the misfortune to have the same name, and now he has to disconnect his phone before one of those Liberal, peace-loving loons actually follows through on his threat to take out the Tea Party Patriot with the same name as the shooter. Political Photo-Shopper Edward Cropper shows us Brian Ross’ Emily Litella Apology.
MONDAY in our Special “Obama Campaign Update” E-dition,The Blower said if it’s Monday, Obama must be in Cincinnati.
Yesterday at the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Charles Foster Kane why Obama was coming to Cincinnati for just another campaign event today. “He has to be someplace,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, “and Obama’s been campaigning for re-election every day since his Inauguration and with over-taxed payers picking up the $179,750-per-hour tab for Air Force One (which is so convenient for making illegal fund-raising calls), it was just probably our turn again. At least there’s no pretense that Monday’s over-taxed payer funded trip is anything more than a campaign event. And maybe just a little fund-raiser!
Kane said, “It will be interesting to see if John Boehner blasts Obama for misusing over-taxed payers’ fund one more time.”
Not to worry, says Obama’s White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard, “Over-taxed payers don’t pay for Obama’s campaign travel. No kidding!”
TUESDAY in our Official “Obama’s Visit Was No BFD” E-dition,The Blower explained Monday was just another crappy Obama campaign event and our “Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers” included:
Obama’s been campaigning for re-election every day since his Inauguration, so showing up in Cincinnati for Monday’s Just Another Obama Crappy Campaign Event with “111” more days until the November Elections is no big deal.—National News Media
The Obama Campaign has always felt welcome in Cincinnati ever since RINO Party Boss Alex T. helped me turn Hamilton County “Blue” in 2008. —Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka
Was publishing Cincinnati Girly Mayor Mark Mallory’s “Love Letter to Obama” on Monday timely enough? —Feckless Fishwrappers
Would it do any good for Republicans to complain about Obama misusing over-taxed payers’ funds one more time? —GOP House Speaker John Boehner
Does anybody remember whenObama was in Cincinnati to deliver his Historic “Bridge Too Far” Campaign Speech last September? He promised all those shovel ready jobs and there were no jobs? —Gary Girder, a Still Unemployed Member of the Amalgamated Union of Bridge Builders
The Obama Campaign chose Music Hall for Monday’s Just Another Obama Crappy Campaign Event so we wouldn’t have so far to walk when the doors opened at 11:30 A.M. and the event didn’t actually start until three hours later. —City Hall Slackers, Taking a Really Long Lunch
No matter how long the wait, we could easily find time to attend Monday’s Just Another Obama Crappy Campaign Event because over-taxed payers are all working. —Political Parasites Looking for More Free Stuff from the Government
WEDNESDAY in our Special “Post Obama Visit Analysis” E-dition,The Blower asked, “So how much did he make at the fund-raiser?”
Monday was more much ado about nothing during Just Obama’s Crappy Campaign Event in Cincinnati. Obama’s been campaigning for re-election at over-taxed payers’ expense every day since his Inauguration, and Monday it was our turn. It won’t be Obama’s last visit during the then next “111” more days before the November Elections. Somebody will have to speak to the Union Goons on Labor Day at Coney Island.
Obama’s Tuesday schedule showed another busy day for POTUS, as the Obama Campaign raised at least $5.9-million dollars from four fundraisers Obama did in Texas.
9:00 am ET: Departs White House
11:30 am CT: Arrives San Antonio
1:00 pm CT: Delivers remarks at a fundraiser; The Henry B. Gonzalez Convention Center, San Antonio
2:30 pm CT: Attends a fundraiser; private residence, San Antonio
3:50 pm CT: Departs San Antonio
4:25 pm CT: Arrives Austin
5:50 pm CT: Delivers remarks at a fundraiser; Austin Music Hall
7:55 pm CT: Delivers remarks at a fundraiser, private residence
9:10 pm CT: Departs Austin
1:20 am ET: Arrives White House
THURSDAY, in our Special “Historic Headlines” E-dition,The Blower was getting ready to celebrate the 43rd anniversary of Neil Armstrong’s walk on the moon and bemoan Obama’s ending of America’s Manned Space Program:
This morning, Hurley the Historian told us to move over because tomorrow’s e-dition belongs to him. After all, won’t it be 43 years ago (July 20, 1969) since we were all watching Neil Armstrong walking on the moon? From 1971 to 1979 Neil Armstrong was professor of Aerospace engineering at the University of Cincinnati. And no doubt, today everybody will be echoing our Quote for Today Committee choice of Armstrong’s immortal: “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”
FRIDAY in our Just Another “Conservative Counterpunch” E-dition,The Blower asked if Romney had finally taken the gloves off:
Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus said with then only “108” more days until the Presidential Elections, Conservatives were really enjoying Romney going more on the attack these days, especially in Bowling Green, Ohio on Wednesday, when Mitt the Viking accused Obama yesterday of caring more about his own job security than about creating jobs for millions of unemployed Americans.
Meanwhile, the Onion reported Romney came clean and admitted he made $32 Trillion in 2006. [READ THAT STORY HERE]
SATURDAY in our Special “Political Exploitation” E-dition,The Blower asked, What good is a tragedy if you don’t use it?
As if all that hype about the opening of the “The Dark Knight Rises” weren’t enough, some nut job dressed in black and killed as many people as he could in Colorado at the midnight movie screening. Who says there’s no such thing as bad publicity? What was that movie’s rating anyway—“AK-47?” Some people even suggest the Batman movie shooting imitated a scene in a 1986 comic. [READ MORE ABOUT THAT HERE]
Liberals immediately identified the shooter as a “White Caucasian” and began to blame Rush Limbaugh.
TIME Magazine says there’s nothing wrong with politicizing the Colorado Movie Tragedy.
On CNN, Piers Morgan blamed U.S. Gun Laws. NYC Mayor Bloomberg wanted to know the size of the soft drinks being served in that Colorado movie theater and if Obama and Romney would crackdown on Second Amendment Rights in wake of the movie massacre, as our Photo-Shop Editorial Spoofer Edward Cropper puts it all into perspective.
Although our campaign is not associated with the Failed United Way, your liberal guilt giving throughout the year still makes it all possible.
SEEDIEST KIDS OF ALL HOT LINE
e-mail your stories about worthy waifs today.
PRESIDENTIAL POLITICS 2012:The killings in Colorado stunned the political world and led to a momentary pause in campaigning on the presidential trail.
The Romney campaign immediately announced it would be pulling all ads in Colorado until further notice and that Governor Romney would be addressing the Colorado shootings at his New Hampshire event later in the day.
In Fort Myers, Florida, Obama supporters hooted and hollered through Obama’s so-called “remembrance speech for the victims of the Colorado movie shooting,” chanting “Four More Years!” at what was supposed to be a “non-political event.” Obama even said, “But what if Malia and Sasha had been at the theater?” Then the entire audience would’ve had Secret Service protection. You can’t get much more non-political than that.
Aboard Air Force One at over-taxed payers’ expense, Obama Campaign spokesman Jen Psaki said Obama’s reelection campaign has asked affiliates to pull down negative ads in the wake of the movie theater shooting in Colorado. It was not clear whether Obama’s negative ads were being pulled across the country, or just in Colorado.
Obama’s White House Spoke Dweeb Jay Cardboard said “I would say as you know the president believes we need to take common sense measures that protect the Second Amendment rights of Americans while ensuring that those who should not have guns under existing laws do not get them.” What a load of crap that was!
NYC Mayor Bloomberg wanted to know the size of the soft drinks being served in that Colorado movie theater and if Obama and Romney would crackdown on Second Amendment Rights in wake of the movie massacre.
Obviously, with then only “107” more days until the Presidential Elections, politicians will be following Obama’s good friend Rahm Emmanuel’s advice by not letting this crisis goes to waste.
OHIO RINO PARTY:In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chef Gerry Manders reported Ohio Republican Party Chairman Boob Bennett issued the following statement upon Vice President Biden’s Just Another Campaign visit to Columbus: “Neither the latest campaign report released nor Biden’s visit will save the President from the reality that he hasn’t stood up to China for American manufacturing jobs. The fact remains that under Obama, our country’s manufacturing sector has lost half a million jobs and just last month U.S. manufacturing declined for the first time in three years.”
THE LATEST POLLS:Whistleblower Pollster Ron Rasmussen says Voters strongly believe that it’s important for the government to create an environment that encourages economic growth and ensures economic fairness, but growth is seen as the higher priority.
OUR LATE NIGHT JOKEWATCHER liked Jay Leno’s “Jobless claims rose again by 35,000 last week. Not good. But it does show that if you’re unsuccessful in this country, you didn’t do it on your own. You had help. Thank you, President Obama.”
HURLEY THE HISTORIAN says on this date in 1934 Public Enemy Number One John Dillinger was gunned down outside the Biograph Theatre in Chicago. Johnny Depp says, “See, there was violence in America even then.”
OUR QUOTE FOR TODAY COMMITTEE: chose that famous anti-gun control slogan: “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” But The Blower liked Eddie Izzard’s “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people, and monkeys do too (if they have a gun).”
VOTER FRAUD UPDATE: In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Ohio Republicans are now questioning the validity of signatures gathered by Voters First, a coalition pushing a ballot issue to change how Ohio legislative and congressional districts are drawn.
THUGS ‘R US: AFL-CIO Boss Richard Trumka asks Unionists to fight excessive CEO salaries, but he fails to mention he makes eight times as much as the Average American.
HAMILTON COUNTY RINO PARTY: Did Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka really say the Obama Campaign has always felt welcome in Cincinnati ever since RINO Party Boss Alex T. helped him turn Hamilton County “Blue” in 2008?
MEDIA MENDACITY:Conservative Columnists have noted how the Obama Administration gutted the historic Welfare Reform Bill, but so far all those Obama Loving networks newscasts have totally ignored the story.
LIBERAL LUNACY: In Human Events’ “365 Ways to Drive a Liberal Crazy,” #198 says never speak of “Affirmative Action” —only of “Reverse Discrimination.” Elaborate by saying how angry it makes you that talented blacks, Mexican-Americans, and others who secured their jobs and their college places purely on their own merit will forever be looked on with suspicion and resentment as having gotten there purely because of the color of their skin (or other minority-qualifying attributes).
DELUSIONAL DEMOCRATS: House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi the ObamaTax as an “act of fiscal stability” that will save the government money in the long term.
REPUBLICANS FOR HIGHER TAXES: applaud the Northwest School Board for their 4-1 vote to increase property taxes on the undertaxed citizens of the school district. They condemn fiscal conservative Dan Unger, the one no vote, for saying that the taxpayers should be given as much concern as the tax receivers.
MORE FECKLESS FISHWRAPPERY: Metro Mole wonders if Skaggie Maggie really sent a letter to those all loyal folks who’d been forced to retire from The Fishwrap, saying in order for her to get her bonus this year, they would no longer be able to buy their newspapers (that were supposed to be free) at discount prices, and they would have to pay the same prices as everyone else, who by the way, just got a letter saying their prices were going up too.
RACIAL HEALING UPDATE: We’re still waiting to see a list of those Colorado Movie Shooting Victims by race, so our Racial Racketeers won’t fell left out on this story.
LEGAL BRIEFS: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo really misses Lovely Lady Lawyer Lisa Wells on WLW Hate Radio. Where did she go?? As many of you know, 700 WLW replaced “Crazy Eric” Deters with Lisa Wells a year and half ago and while she was firing up the airwaves weekend after weekend, during the past month she has only co-hosted shows? Is it that Lisa openly criticized “Crazy Eric” and the all-powerful Bill Cunningham, Eric’s “close and personal friend?” Or were the Greedy Weasels just using her to demonstrate the appearance of diversify on their staff prior to re-licensing? And if they weren’t just being sexist, why’d Cunningham only post the top half of a photo of bikini-clad Lisa on his blog demanding she release the complete photo, for the entertainment of baloney boppers in his audience.
HOW ABOUT DEM REDS: Typical Reds’ Rooter Farley Fairweather couldn’t stop wondering how many home runs Bronson Arroyo would be giving up in Saturday night’s game.
THE CINCINNATI MESS (You’ll only read about in The Blower):Outraged Over-Taxed Payer Tino Delgato wonders who had more body guards, Obama or Mallory? Thank goodness that $48 million was spent on Washington Park. They had to have Monday’s Obama Event in the afternoon, since park benches are filled with sleepers at night and in the morning. Go Figure!!!
CH SNITCH AT 1000 MAIN STREET: says the reason not many courthouse cronies bothered to show up at Monday’s Tea Party’s Rally on Fountain Square was because RINO Party Boss Alex T., Mall Cop GOP forgot to ask them.
IN ANDERSON:Thursday’s Township Trustees Meeting was cut short so Disgraced Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien could dash out the back door before reporters from Channels 12 and 19 could ask him about all those Angry Andersonians demanding his resignation, before he goes to trial for masturbating in a woman’s car.
SOREHEADS IN THE SUBURBS: wonder if Kevin O’Brien would explain a “sorehead” is what you get when you run out of Vaseline.
OHIO’S SECOND CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT: This week, everybody who wonders why you don’t see directions to “Bronze Star Brad” Wenstrup’s campaign office on his web page, e-mailed entries to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
CLERMONT CRONIES: The story-behind-the-story of the Clermont GOP publicly begging for donations to pay for the party headquarters is that the HQ is in a building owned by the Masonic Lodge, and a lot of the old guard (Tim Rudd and company) are Masons. So, in essence, they want over-taxed payers to support their secretive little club and an organization that is historically anti-Catholic. The Blower is not sure which/ if any members of the local Tea Party are members of the Masons, but, at least publicly, the Tea Party claims to be in favor of openness and transparency. So will the Tea Party show its hypocrisy by supporting the funneling of funds to support a secretive organization?
THIS WEEK IN NORTHERN KENTUCKY: Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says when Mayor Diane “Blondie” Whalen spotted Anderson Township Dis-Trustee Kevin “Spanky” O’Brien at JD Byrider used car sales in Florence, she immediately started making calls to area communities trying to determine which village was missing its idiot.
READING THE TEA LEAVES: Who says our local Tea Partiers are asleep in 2012? Twice as many Patriots as expected laced up their boots and joined the cavalry at Tuesday night’s Anderson Tea Party Meeting.
NOW HERE’S THE LATEST FROM BUNKY TADWELL, THE BARD OF CLEVES:Summer is well under way and we have another timely poem from Bunky Tadwell, the Bard of Cleves.
Seeing is Believing
Ah the wondrous days of summer
The cricket’s cheerful song.
The see-thru clothes the girlies wear
And the break-a-way lacy thong.
THIS WEEK AT A MEETING OF THE CONSERVATIVE AGENDA: Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane about Obama’s ridiculous claim that successful businessmen didn’t succeed on their own. “Obama might have something there,” Kane admitted. “The Blower certainly couldn’t accomplish as much as we have without all our wonderful snitches.
AND COMING UP IN “THE WEEK THAT WILL BE”:The Blower’s Campaign Countdowns to will continue. Speaking of which, the 2012 Elections are only “106” days away.
Monday if the Obama and Romney campaigns are still exploiting the Colorado Movie Massacre, and we’ll take our shot at it too.
Tuesday is “Cousins Day” in Kentucky, and a really special time for family fun, if you know what we mean.
Wednesday is “Culinarians Day” which most cooks would enjoy most be eating out.
Thursday is “All or Nothing Day.” Extremists will like that.
The first line of next Friday’s limerick is: “Here’s to thank when you succeed” and some of you limerick writers might see who you might find you give you some help.
And Saturday we’ll probably be reviewing Friday night’s opening of the London Olympics, so we’ll all have to get in shape for that.
WEEK IN REVIEW HOT LINE
e-mail your revolutionary recaps today
Some political scorekeeping items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally political scorekeeping subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use a lot more.
Link of the Day
Obama Suspends Campaign Totally to Mourn Colorado Shooting Victims
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
During the 2012 Olympics in London, please don’t remind voters how Obama was humiliated in 2009 when Olympics Officials “just said no” after he and Michelle demanded the 2016 O-lympics be given to Chicago. —Obama Supporters in the Press
How’s this for campaign strategy: The White House just told us to call Romney a “Wimp.” —Newsweak Magazine
Even though we already spend more per student than 98% of Ohio’s school districts, we are in violation of Ohio law by having six schools that have failed to submit the required safety plans and floor plans that would help emergency personnel in a school emergency. If only we had even more money. — Princeton School Board
It’s a good thing the Reds didn’t win 20 games in a row, or I’d have to let the Ghost of Marge Schott shave my balls. —Marty Brennaman
I can’t wait to try Chick-Fil-A’s new homophobic sandwich, when its “Queer-Hatin” Cordon Bleu’ goes on sale. —Phil Burr-Ass, the Queen City’s Homo Hater in Chief
Sarah Palin likes Chick-Fil-A. —Northern Kentucky Tea Partiers
Some Obama Campaign Bashing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally Obama Campaign Bashing subscribers, but we could always use more.
Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.
