Daily Archives: May 24, 2012

Special “Divided DemocRATS” E-dition

One of the best parts about publishing The Whistleblower Newswire is checking our e-mail first thing each morning to see some of those politically insightful items we’ve received from our equally politically insightful subscribers. Our readers’ comments are extremely helpful for our analysis and interpretation of today’s important top stories. 

Thursday, May 24, 2012

More DemocRAT D-Words:

“Discouraged,” “Dissatisfied,” and “Divided”

  • Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says when an “historic” president is running for re-election, primary elections are not supposed to be an embarrassment, but only two weeks ago an imprisoned felon got 41% of the vote against Obama in the West Virginia Primary, and Tuesday, Noted Arkansas Political Reporter Razorback Tadwell says 41% of Discouraged DemocRATS in Arkansas voted for unknown lawyer John Wolfe from Tennessee, while in Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo reports Obama lost 42% of Bluegrass primary voters to “uncommitted.” 

No doubt Obama Supporters in the Press will dismiss those Dissatisfied DemocRATS as racists, claiming white DemocRATS in Appalachia won’t vote for Obama because he is black.

  • Meanwhile, White House Spokes Dweeb Jay Cardboard broke the needle on the BS meter when he told reporters Obama really isn’t mad at Defiant DemocRATs who are repudiating him these days. That was right after Cardboard refused to condemn Obama’s Occupy Protesters after they trashed everything in sight last weekend during the NATO Summit in Chicago.
  • Now here’s Joe Biden’s “Blame of the Day” from his never-ending list of Vice Presidential Verbal Gaffes: “The Tea Party caused the recession.”
  • Today there are only “165” more days until the Presidential Elections in November, and The Blower predicts it’s only going to get worse.
  • Meanwhile, closer to home, Hurley the Historian says when Major League Baseball’s first-ever night game was played under the newly installed lights at Crosley Field on this date in 1935, the Cincinnati Reds beat the Philadelphia Phillies 2-1.
  • That’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose former Reds Manager Sparky Anderson’s: “Don’t call us (ballplayers) heroes. Firemen are heroes.”
  • Finally, at yesterday’s “Bribe Lunch,” a political consultant was asking Charles Foster Kane what he thought about all that money people were losing who’d bought Facebook stock last week. “Maybe that’s why Whistleblower Business Editor Merrill Forbes had advised against buying it,” our Beloved Whistleblower Publisher explained, “especially since financial regulators in the U.S. are now taking a closer look at whether key information about the company’s financial prospects was provided to special select investors in advance of the sale, but withheld from others.”

The Blower’s “Just Say No to Social Networking” Policy is well known, despite the fact that a few prominent people still claim to be The Blower’s Faux Facebook “Friends.”


Bluegrass Ballot Boycotts

  • In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says fewer than 14% of Kentucky voters went to the polls on Tuesday, which means 86% disregarded what Jesse “The Body” Ventura always said: “If you don’t vote, you’ll be leaving the decision to someone even dumber than you are.”  The same 86% will no doubt also pay no attention to The Blower’s admonition that “People who don’t vote have no right to complain.”

Most so-called political reporters are writing about the “Tea Party” victory for Lewis County’s Judge-Executive Thomas Massie Tuesday night.

The Republican establishment in CamBoo Land will no doubt  blame that Texas Super-PAC that spent $560,000 on radio and television ads supporting Massie and attacking his opponents, Boondoggle County Judge-Executive Gary Moore and the Whistleblower’s own Trooper Babe, Alicia Webb-Edgington. Another super PAC, Americans for Growth, Opportunity and Prosperity, spent more than $80,000 on mailers supporting Massie.

But whether Super-PAC money made the difference can be debated forever.  Many NoKY establishment Republicans fear for their future due to this second Tea Party Tsunami.  Rand Paul’s stature was raised again Tuesday night. The short story of the night was that long ago, everybody except Gary Moore knew that Gary did not have a chance.

The real story is the 16-point case of “Whoop Ass’” that was opened up on Trooper Babe Alicia Webb Edgington.  This was the sad byproduct of Goof Doofus’ embarrassing, complete loss-of-power and stature. Tom Massie was very complimentary of Geoff Davis during his speech Tuesday night, but the troops on the ground knew the real deal.  The Goofster must’ve missed that class at West Point where he would’ve been taught not to surrender his reputation, especially over someone not 1/10 his stature. 

Let’s look at what Alicia had to start with:

    • Hand-picked by Goof Doofus, Alicia was the Fourth District Republican Chairperson for nearly three years!  That gave her multiple face-to-face access (at every county Lincoln Day dinner) to each and every Republican elected official (including notes from the Goofster’s campaign about the real power brokers in each county) and each county Republican executive committee in Kentucky’s Fourth Congressional District.
    • Early on, there was the unofficial “whispered” endorsement from the retiring Congressman. Rick VanMeter from Doofus’ staff became Alicia’s campaign manager. Alicia was introduced to  Washington, DC and local Kentucky PACs. Other powerful endorsements included the NRA, Associated Builders and Contractors, and Kentucky Firefighters. Alicia received all the data from Goof’s previous campaigns (including donor lists, private phone numbers of top contributors, voter lists, volunteer lists, etc.) She also had the endorsement of Kevin Sell (Goof Davis’s first pick to run), who is the current Republican Fourth District Chair. Former Senator “BeanBall Jim” Bunning endorsed Alicia, too. So how could those six guys even dare consider running against her?
    • Even with her head start, she couldn’t raise enough money to be competitive. People wanted a change. Goof Doofus had lost the support of several key large contributors and Alecia never got them back. Gary Moore had the Judge Executive power/ threat to raise money. If you add the money reported from AmeriGOP (which was nearly 100% from local contributors ) to what Massie raised, Gary Moore and Tom Massie were nearly even.  It took the “official” endorsements of Goof Doofus and the Old BeanBaller (along with Fishwrap’s front page story, another round of personal calls to former Doofus donors and two fund-raising letters; one personal from Congressman Doofus) for Alicia to raise even a few dollars during the last month. Her campaign was a dismal failure.
  • The sad thing is that Alicia’s staff and supporters actually thought they were going to win.  As the results came in, they were as surprised as the time Massie’s “Unendorsement” ad first ran during the UK championship game! Maybe her campaign should’ve run The Whistleblower’s “Legs” commercial on TV a few more times.  Her victory would’ve been by a landslide. [WATCH IT HERE]


  More Proud Sponsors and Avid Fans

 Today’s edition is brought to you by a generous “in-kind” donation during our May fund-raising drive from Slinky Legs Stockings. You’ll never guess who their new Spokesmodel is. 


DIVIDED DEMOCRATS HOT LINE

e-mail your divisive documents today.

Some divisive items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally divisive subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use more.


Link of the Day

Crossroads GPS: “Basketball”

 

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