Friday, April 27, 2012
Somebody Finally Noticed!
- Whistleblower Senior National Political Affairs Analyst Britt Humus says, “It finally happened. Somebody actually complained that Obama was using over-taxed payers’ funds for fund-raising and campaigning.” Even some Obama Supporters in the Press are starting to notice. The Blower’s only been telling you that since Obama’s 2012 Re-election Campaign Kickoff at his 2009 Inauguration.
How bad has it become lately? GOP House Speaker John Boehner even called on Obama’s campaign to reimburse over-taxed payers for the cost of a campaign-style trip to battleground states, accusing the White House of a “pathetic” attempt to stir up an election-year fight over student loans.
- And what’s Obama’s re-election campaign come to anyway? How pathetic was POTUS on Late Night TV this week, slow-jamming an election speech? He violated Campaign Finance Law when he appeared on Jimmy Fallon’s show. Who says the punishment should fit the crime –This week it did. Even Jon Stewart told Obama “You don’t have to do this shit anymore.”
No wonder the latest American Crossroads Web Ad slams Obama as the “Celebrity President”: “Four years ago Americans elected the biggest celebrity in the world. And America got one cool president. But after four years of a celebrity president, one-in-two recent college grads are jobless or underemployed, 85% moving back in with their parents, student loan debt exceeds one trillion dollars.”
Or how about this RNC ad on Obama and Romney, showing us “A Tale Of Two Leaders.”
- Today there are only “192” more days until the 2012 Presidential Elections on November 6. On November 7, the 2016 Presidential Elections will officially begin.
- In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says the “Campaign for Ohio” is already in high gear. Presumptive Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney will appear at Otterbein University in Westerville today. That’ll be his second visit to Ohio in just over a week. Obama and Michelle will be back in Ohio for a big rally on May 5. Obsessive Obama Supporters Tom and Rose have already received three spam-grams from the Obama re-election Campaigners at the White House telling them what time the doors open at the Schottenstein Center at Ohio State. Will anybody complain if Obama’s presidential duties interfere with his fund-raising and campaigning?
The Disingenuous DemocRATS are already pulling out all the stops in Ohio, where Demo-Labor Party Boss Chris Redfern is asking for an additional $8 from everyone on his e-mail list to go towards his critical April filing deadline to push back against the Romney/Portman campaign. No kidding.
- Meanwhile, O’dell Owens will be get a $30,000 performance bonus for his first year as president at Cincinnati State Technical & Community College. Has anybody noticed how much O’dell is starting to look like Venezuelan Dictator Hugo Chavez lately?
- Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1773, The British Parliament passed the Tea Act, a bill designed to save the faltering East India Company by greatly lowering its tea tax and thus granting it a monopoly on the American tea trade. That tax really worked out well, but have our Tea Party Patriots forgotten?
- Our Sorehead in the Suburbs says Wyoming Clown-cil woman Vivacious Vicki Zwissler says her City is giving away too much to a developer The City when it hands over a defunct restaurant property the Hamilton County Auditor values at $443,000, along with $270,000 for repairs and improvements on the developer’s BFD “promise” to bring 25 jobs to the City. [SEE THAT STORY HERE]
- In Northern Kentucky, Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says with only 25 more days until the May 22 GOP Congressional Primaries, former U.S. Senator “BeanBall Jim” Bunning now says he regrets endorsing his successor Rand Paul. But that was only after the Randster endorsed Tea Party Favorite Thomas Massie to succeed retiring Congressman Goof Doofus, instead of our Former Hall of Famer’s pick, Trooper Babe Alecia Webb-Edgington. You can ask Senator Paul about it on Monday at 5 PM when he appears at the League of Kentucky Property Owners free League of Kentucky Property Owners event at the Boondoggle County Extension Office. [Register here for your free ticket.]
Also on Monday, a representative of the Taliaferro, Carran & Keys law firm will present the results of an investigation of Mayor Martin requested by a majority of Vanilla Hills City Council. The lynching is scheduled for immediately after that meeting.
- Finally, yesterday during a Bribe Lunch at J. Alexander’s on “Take Your Daughter to Work Day,” a political consultant was asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane how The Blower selects those “Special Days” to promote.
“That’s easy,” Kane explained. “Take Friday, for example. You have a choice among ‘Babe Ruth Day’ (honoring one of Baseball’s greatest players ever), ‘Tell a Story Day” (where you’re supposed to stay home and tell stories to your kids), or ‘Prime Rib Day,” (where you can enjoy big, thick, juicy cut of prime rib, cooked perfectly to your liking.)
“So which one will you choose?” the consultant asked.
“I’ll have the prime rib,” Kane said. “Make that an end cut, and don’t forget the onion straws. I hear they’re delicious.”
Stories We’re Working On
- Big Waiting List for Secret Service Jobs
- Supremes skeptical of Obama’s use of power
- More Americans Than Projected File Jobless Claims
- New Polls show Romney surging with Independents
- Fishwrap announces new editorial page editor
- More Bitching about the Brent Spence Bridge
- How about them Reds?
Whistleblower Web Poll
(A) Economy’s still in the crapper: 2%
(B) Gas prices still more than doubled since he took office: 1%
(C) A new scandal every week: 1%
(D) Can find enough time for fund-raising and campaigning: 96%
Re-Distributing the Wealth
This week, everybody who’s wondering if the Reds will get their money’s worth for all those big salaries this year, e-mailed his entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.
The winner is Typical Reds Rooter Farley Fairweather, who says, “Joey Votto only has one home run, he struck out to end the game Thursday afternoon, and the Reds have only paid him $2 million so far this year.”
Farley wins a ride in Joey Votto’s sports car, a Tweet from Brandon Phillips, and a shoplifting spree with Mike Leake. His winning limerick is:
Here’s what happened to the Reds this year:
Ol’ Toothpick has lost his magic, I fear.
Aside from Joey’s million-dollar at-bat$,
They play like they don’t give a rat’s.
These money-ballers spend too much time with the cashier.
And from the Anderson Laureate (who’s still working on his taxes):
Here’s what happened to the Reds this year,
They may have to raise the price of a beer
Brandon signed for 72 mil
Do we have that much in the till?
They better start getting their asses in gear.
The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“Here’s how to have fun on Cinco de Mayo”
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