Daily Archives: March 12, 2012

Official “Political Backstabbers Week” E-dition

Monday, March 12, 2012

It’s Almost the Ides of March, Everybody!

            Hurley the Historian says Thursday’s the historic date (March 15, 44 BCE) when Roman Emperor Julius Caesar ignored his soothsayer’s words of warning and went to work that day anyway, whereupon Brutus and the rest of the RINOs in the Senate stabbed him in the back, and the front, and just about every other place on his body. Sounds a little like one of those 2012 Republican Presidential Debates, doesn’t it?

            Our Quote for Today Committee says “Beware the Ides of March” and “Et tu, Brute” are two of the most remembered lines from all of Shakespeare’s plays.

           That’s why the Ides of March is “Political Backstabbers Day.” It’s celebrated as a national holiday by Political Backstabbers and Backstabees (most elected officials have been both), as well as people who’ll knife you in the back just to get ahead, and people in politics you once thought were your friends. We know who all of you are, and more importantly, you all know that The Blower knows who all of you are. Maybe that’s why Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane always sits with his back to the wall when a big backstabber buys his lunch, especially on March 15. Obviously, he learned  backstabbers can only get you when your back is turned.  

            Does anybody remember when Former Hamilton County RINO Party Boss George Vincent (who resigned in disgrace) and local Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka made a deal for their candidates not to stab each other in the back, but Vincent’s replacement (employed at Vincent’s law firm) Alex T., Mall Cop GOP sucked up to liberals working night and day to destroy the GOP, sold his soul to Demonic DemocRAT $tan Che$ley on June 8, 2008, said he wanted his local RINO Party to be a “big tent” (just like the circus), and then got that big tent pole shoved so far up his ass on Election Day in 2008 that the entire Hamilton County turned “Blue” for the first time in history, something The Whistleblower had only been predicting for the previous two years. No wonder Real Republicans still feel they’ve been stabbed in the back.    

           In Northern Kentucky, Our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney E Rob Sanders says unfortunately, political backstabbing isn’t even a misdemeanor. Eric ‘Call Me Crazy,’ Big Mouth, Most Sanctioned, Ambulance Chaser, No Count of a Radio Host, Shameless Self Promoter, Willie Wannabe, Why Haven’t I Been Disbarred, Who Likes Bulldogs and Failed Roadhouse Operator Deters says every member of the Cabal out to destroy him is nothing but a backstabber, and everybody’s wondering why Miss Vicki is having an Ides of March Party on Thursday, instead of her customary more traditional St. Patrick’s Day Party on Saturday. Don’t forget, all of you Bluegrass Backstabbers, this year, it’s BYOK (Bring Your Own Knives).

            On Fox, “Family Guy” has a “Julius Caesar” program on the Ides of March, but Flashlight Theater head writer and producer Mischievous Mike Sadouskas says “Backstabbers from Outer Space” won’t be shown Friday at midnight on Insight Channel 22 because some dirty backstabber stole the film. 

            But what’s the best part about the Ides of March on March 15? Our good friend Bobby Leach says it’s because it means BB&BJ Day on March 20 is only five days away.

            So with the “Ides of March” no more than a few days away, everybody’s been sending in his favorite “Backstabbing” jokes, just to be topical, and The Whistleblower Advisor cautions that by sending a brief memo to a colleague or a superior, you have a paper trail that Backstabber’s can’t erase.

          Now it’s time for Our Beloved Whistleblower Motto (Let’s all say it together). Because wherever there’s corruption, we’ll be there. Wherever there’s injustice, we’ll be there. And wherever there’s a bunch of big guys beating up on a little guy, we’ll be there too…holding the little guy down so you can stab him in the back.

           Some of our subscribers, especially those who purposely misrepresented their credentials and are not really “Persons of Consequences,” and have their daily Whistleblower e-mails from the Official Voice of the Conservative Agenda summarily cancelled, are probably calling distinguished members of our review committee a bunch of no-good dirty backstabbers. But Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane has a message for them— Et tu, you backstabbing bastards!

            Today’s Whistleblower is brought to you by a generous donation during our Ides of March fund-raising drive from Backstabbers Anonymous.


BACKSTABBER OF THE YEAR HOT LINE

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Some backstabbing items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally backstabbing subscribers.


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