Friday, March 2, 2012

Top Ten List

Today it’s the Top Ten Reasons Ohio Second District Republican Congressional Candidate Fred Kundrata was recruited to get into the race and attack “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s war hero opponent Brad Wenstrup:

10. I forgot
9. The dog ate it
8. She told me she loved me
7. I did it to help the homeless
6. The Devil made me do it
5. I just wanted to be loved–is there anything wrong with that?
4. I’m a pilot
3. I was framed
2. This whole thing is just one big terrible mistake

…and the Number One Reason Ohio Second District Congressional Candidate Fred Kundrata was recruited to get into the race and attack “Mean Jean” Schmidt’s war hero opponent Brad Wenstrup is… the guys at the “Mean Jean’s” Office said nobody would ever find out.


Only Four More Days

  • In Columbus, Buckeye Bureau Chief Gerry Manders says Liberal Media Outlets across the state are trying to create dissention in Republican ranks by harping on the fact that 2012 Presidential Candidate Ron Paul will not be attending the taping of Fox News’ Huckabee show Saturday at the former DHL facility in Wilmington where more than 8,000 people lost their jobs when the place closed. Optimistic coverage would be that the stage will be three-quarters full, when Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, and Rick Santorum show up. 

Newt Gingrich announced his Ohio leadership team this week with Revered Former Congressman Bob McEwen at the helm. Other notable names in that group include Bill “The Ethnic Cleanser” Seitz, former NFL player Rocky Boiman, named Greed Township to replace Tracy Wrinkles; State Senator Gary Cates; and State Rep-tile Ron Maag, a long-time Whistleblower Faux Facebook Friend.

    • Louis Blessing will be on the ballot this Tuesday for 29th District State Rep-tile.  Republicans for Higher Taxes remembers when Louis Blessing was arrested for DUI after blowing a 0.11 on I-71.  Louis Blessing should fit in well with the rest of the Legislative drunks.
    • And with only four more days until Super Duper Tuesday on March 6, everybody’s still talking about all those gazillions of dollars the Ohio RINO Party is spending to keep their stooges on the Republican State Central Committee, and how much the Ohio GOP House Caucus spending to protect its lackeys like $tate Rep-tile for $ale Peter $tautberg. The Blower says all that money would be better spent trying to tell the truth about Obama and his Disingenuous DemocRATS before this November’s elections in only “248”  more days.

  • Elsewhere in the Spleen of it All, did Mean Jean’s News Flack Barrett Brunsman really call the Highland County Press to intimidate the publisher into retracting his endorsement of Brad Wenstrup. [READ THAT ENDORSEMENT HERE]  And is it sadder or funnier that one of the mystery opponents Jean managed to draw into the race to split the opposition vote also called and complained? Was that you, Fred?

Here’s a hint: Never pick a fight with a guy who buys ink by the barrel!

  • And how about that lying? Have you seen our Bitch in a Ditch’s new television ad?  Does she really call herself a “Job Creator?” No kidding. She’s been “leading the fight” for jobs in Piketon for years, and still no jobs!  Three of the counties in the Second District have some of the worst unemployment rates in the state:  Pike, 14.3% unemployment as of December, 2011; Adams, 12%; Scioto, 11.5% Just imagine how bad unemployment would be in these counties if they weren’t represented by such an effective “Job Creator.”

The Cincinnati City Mess

  • Just as The Blower predicted, Cincinnati New Extreme Liberal City Clown-cil approved giving away one million dollars in over-taxed payers’ funds to a deadbeat black woman.

Only Chris Seelbach, SMLP Christopher Smithermouth, and Foxy Roxy Qualls voted against the soon-to-be down the sewer drain giveaway.  The rest of the fools voted for it, including rich boy lazy dilettante P.G. Sittenfeld, who campaigned on helping the city pay its bills.

Deadbeat restaurant owner Liz Rogers will shutter the not-yet-opened Banks Soul Food Bistro within two years, unless she talks our Nine Fine Clowns into giving her another million dollars to protect their investment.

  • Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1807, Congress abolished the African slave trade, but according to The Whistleblower, The Empty Uppity Oprah Winfrey Campaigning for Obama, Under-funded, Ugly-ass Poorly-Planned Unnagraown Rayroe Museum Not-so-Free-dom Center “Permanently Enslaves the Over-Taxed Payers of Hamilton County.”  

Maybe that’s why our Quote for Today Committee chose “White Guilt, it makes you keep on giving.”


More Media Bias

  • The Forest Hills Urinal really outdid itself this week trying to convince its Dumbed-down, Self-absorbed, Media-influenced, Celebrity-obsessed, Politically-correct Uninformed Short-attention-span Readers to vote for the Forest Gump School’s humongous tax hike so township property owners of $200,000 houses can pay $2,000-a-year to support the greedy teachers and administrators. Just read the headlines on all of these unfairly biased so-called guest columns:

“A yes vote will continue quality education”
“Supporting levy is a wise investment”
“More money does mean better education”
“A yes vote may save you money”
“Levy is a deal”
“Kids worth the yes vote”
“Support Education”
“Support is needed for excellence”
How much can we afford to lose if the levy fails?”
And “Thank school teachers with a yes vote on the levy.”

And you thought Liberal Bias was confined to the mainstream media.

  • Yesterday, The Blower reported those unsigned Green Door Hangers were telling Anderson Over-Taxed Payers that the school administration and teachers were illegally using school property and public resources to influence the vote. The Blower has been reporting about such illegal abuses for nearly 20 years, long before those mercenary attorneys at COAST ever thought how calling yourself an “anti-taxer” could help make you rich.
  • Take our “Ignorance of the Law Update” published on Monday, September 13, 1993 where we asked:         

If Section 3315.07 of the Ohio Revised Code says that no Board of Education shall use public funds to support or oppose the passage of a school levy or to compensate any school district employee for time spent on any activity to influence the outcome of a school levy or bond issue, how do you explain all those complaints about what’s happening in the Cincinnati Public Schools these days?

Our answer was: Perhaps they’re as illiterate as some of the students they’re graduating!

  • Finally, at yesterday’s meeting of the Conservative Agenda, Political Insiders were asking Beloved Whistleblower Publisher Charles Foster Kane why they weren’t able to see the premier broadcast of CFK-TV’s Political Science Theatre 2012 on Anderson Community Television’s Channel 18 at 10:30 P.M. Wednesday night. Did something unexpected really happen with automatic switching?

Or maybe they were serious about their disclaimer that says: “Opinions expressed do not necessarily represent those of the Anderson Community Television (ACT), the ACT Board of Directors, the staff of ACT, or the community governments or the cable company.”

Until we find out when the program will be on again, you can always watch it here.


Bluegrass Bellyachers

  • Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo says there’s not a whole lot of news in Northern Kentucky this morning, probably because everybody’s waiting to see the winner of this week’s Whistleblower Limerick Contest, since the first line is “Don’t worry about ‘Crazy Eric’s suspension.”

Everybody expected one of that Cabal Out To Destroy Eric “Call Me Crazy,” Big Mouth, Most Sanctioned, Ambulance Chaser, No Count of a Radio Host, Shameless Self Promoter, Willie Wannabe, Why Haven’t I Been Disbarred, Who Likes Bulldogs and Failed Roadhouse Operator Deters, would be the winner.

Most people thought our Good Friend Kenton County Commonwealth Attorney E Rob Sanders would take time off from writing a special e-dition of his bombastic e-newsletter showing this picture of Jerome Simpson after the Bungals wide receiver pleaded guilty to a felony drug charge in Northern Kentucky. This is a real photo, not something by Award Winning Photo Illustrator Artis Conception.

Others thought Rick “The BatBoy” Robinson might take time off from writing a guest column for some Northern Kentucky publication nobody ever heard of, or even another chapter of his latest book nobody has ever heard of also.

Some people thought Phil Taliaferro would win, like when they give an Academy Award to one of those geezers for his fine body of work over the years.

And long-time Whistleblower reader William T. Robinson III might even think being president of the American Bar Association would impress our judges.

But the winner is announced below, and we think you may even be surprised when you see who it is.


Stories We’re Working On

  • After Wyoming caucuses, Romney only needs 983 more delegates
  • Obama’s drunken uncle due in court for DUI
  • New ad at DC Metro station tells Obama to “Go to Hell!”
  • Hillary defends administration record on Israel
  • Is “Mean Jean” paying for Fred Kundrata’s yard signs?
  • Guy who once lived in Hebron gets to have dinner at the White House
  • BB&BJ Day in Fort Mitchell on March 20

Whistleblower Web Poll

This week, here’s how the first 17,648 Whistleblower Web Poll respondents said they planned to spend their extra $40-per-month payroll tax cut extension victory GOP House Speaker John Boehner and his spineless Republicans gave Obama and his Disingenuous DemocRATS:
(A) Obamacare: 2%
(B) Raises for school administrators and teachers: 1%
(C) Obama’s $5-per-gallon gasoline: 1%
(D) Giving it to their grandchildren, who’ll have to pay the debt: 96%

Note: Everything we write doesn’t have to be so damn cynical and mean-spirited, it’s just so much more fun that way!


Suspension of Disbelief

This week, everybody who thinks Eric “Call Me Crazy,” Big Mouth, Most Sanctioned, Ambulance Chaser, No Count of a Radio Host, Shameless Self Promoter, Willie Wannabe, Why Haven’t I Been Disbarred, Who Likes Bulldogs and Failed Roadhouse Operator Deters’ 61-day suspension is not nearly long enough, e-mailed an entry to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest. The winner is Radio Hottie Lady Lawyer Lisa Wells who says, “Crazy Eric is really a wimp. He promised to fight his suspension all the way to the Supreme Court.”

Lisa wins a big raise at WLW for taking over Crazy Eric’s old program that he used to do for free, an offer to join the Cabal out to Destroy Crazy Eric, which like WLW Hate Radio up till now has been an all male bastion; and selection as spokesmodel for Patty Brisbane’s Dildo World. Her winning limerick is:

Don’t worry about Crazy Eric’s suspension
It’s no cause for your old hypertension
He’ll just be counting the days,
And planning the ways
To still have plenty of media attention.

And from the Anderson Laureate (who now knows why his poetic license is being revoked and now has something to tell the padre at this week’s confession):

Don’t worry about Crazy Eric’s suspension
At least he’s not facing detention
He got 61 days
For his unethical ways
Which we know are too numerous to mention.

The first line of next week’s limerick is:
“After Super Duper Tuesday’s Elections.”


POLITICAL STOOGES HOT LINE

e-mail your payoffs and prices today.

Some extremely critical items in today’s Blower were sent in by our extremely critical subscribers, but we could always use more.


Link of the Day

Jimmy Obama

     Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


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